WWF 1998 Review

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: Cactus Jack & Chainsaw Charlie
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF RAW is WAR
March 30th, 1998
Albany, New York

So a little backstory, this is the first ever episode of RAW i watched. It wasn't live cause I was 7 at the time. But I remember my mum's friends kid, the guy that first showed me Shawn/Taker - HIAC recorded this on VHS. So, IDK what day like if this was the weekend or like months later after this but he gave me this on tape to borrow so I did and never gave it back. I still have it to this day.

Vince McMahon comes out holding the Attitude Era Big winged eagle belt Vince is also met with BOOOOOOO's. He thinks the mic isn't working because the crowd boos so loudly, cause he can't hear himself. He then says he's pleased to present to you the NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION CHAMPION STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN. Austin comes out with the old title, he quickly grabs the new one and drops the old one on Vince's foot. Vince congratulates him and he wants to clear up any misunderstandings, and misinterpretations about what he may have said several weeks ago. The truth is, he's proud of him becoming the WWF Champion. He's proud of him to represent his company, and together. the key word is together. with his vision and Austin's charisma, he might become the greatest WWF Champion of all time. Austin says to cut through all the BS and he knows for a fact that he hates him. But that's okay, cause I hate you right back. What he has to understand is that there ain't no "we". He ain't gonna mold him or break him. What you see is what you get, and if he doesn't like that, tough luck. Vince says he is incapable of hate and it's not a word in his vocabulary. He finds him to be a genuine human being. A swell guy. I LOVE YOU! He's a hell of a guy. Austin makes him say he loves him again. Vince says not to get confrontational but repeats himself off mic. Austin makes him say it on mic and Vince says it's a figure of speech. Austin says to look in his bloodshot eyes when he says he won't do things his way. He'll continue to raise as much hell and chaos and give him more grey hairs every single day of his life. Nobody, especially Vince McMahon, tells Stone Cold what to do, and that's the bottom line. Vince says they can do this the easy way or they can do this the hard way, and that's gonna be his decision. Austin says he want's to know what Vince's definition of that? Vince says the easy way is to learn to be flexible and adapt, Adaptation is a key to life and as well as in business. The hard way? He'll wind up doing things his way anyhow if he has to force him and they don't even need to discuss that. Austin says he needs 10 seconds to think about this......He looks into the crowd.............AND HITS VINCE WITH A STUNNER! Austin grabs the mic and says " IF YOU WANT STONE COLD TO CONTINUE THINGS THE HARD WAY, GIMME A HELL YEAH!"

In the back, Vince is being attended to by, Brisco, Patterson, and Sarge.

The Legion of Doom (w/Sunny) vs. Los Boricus
LOD SQUASH!

After the match; Sunny dubs LOD...LOD 2000

At ringside, JR talks about how the tag titles have been held up by some bogus technicality so tonight it will be the Outlaws vs. Jack/Carlie in a cage, to determine the undisputed tag champions.

Backstage: Kevin Kelly says an irate Vince just got off the phone with the police and wants Austin arrested NOW.

Kevin Kelly is now in the men's locker room, he says he heard the DOA try to smarten up Austin, letting him know the police are on their way. But Austin told them he ain't going nowhere, and Vince don't have the balls to have him arrested.

On commentary, JR says there has been a rift in DX, and Triple H is gonna let us know what is going on later on.

Kurrgan (w/Jackyl) vs. Chainz
TRASH! We get split screen of Vince waiting in the parking lot for the cops. Kurrgan wins with his shitty vice claw gimmick.

In the parking lot; The feds arrive, it's 4 of them. Sarge and Brisco are now with him and they all walk in search of Austin. Vince tells them where Austin's dressing room is.

JAKK'S SLAMMER'S COMMERCIAL

Tennessee Lee is in the ring and introduces J E DOUBLE F J A DOUBLE R E DOUBLE T...AIN'T HE GRAT. Jeff comes out on a horse again.

Jeff Jarrett (w/Tennessee Lee) vs. Aguila
A really good Jeff showcase on offense, Augulia has some shaky moments one including a moonsault which he has Jeff too far out so when Jeff rolls in to avoid, Aguila hits his back clean but Jeff acts like it didn't touch him He then locks in the figure four and Aguila taps. On commentary, Lee claims he has a huge surprise next week.

After the match; Blackman runs out and cleans the ring off Jeff, Blackman then goes after Lee but Jeff makes the save and the heels leave.

Backstage: Austin is now in handcuffs and is being led by officers, he yells that this is a hell of a rib. Austin runs into him Vince with his shoulder after Vince says he deserves this, Austin gets pulled away and says he can't keep him in there forever and his ass is his.

During the break, Austin gets loaded into the back of the police car with Austin yelling he's gonna getcha, ass, Vince.

Vince McMahon, Brisco and Sarge come down to the ring. Vince says he says he feels he owes the fans an explanation if they'll show a little respect. Perhaps in the state of mind, Mr. Austin is in, a twenty-four hour cooling off period is appropriate. He didn't want to have to do that and he gave Mr. Austin a choice. He selected his choice and dammit, he selected his.

Backstage: Triple H and Chyna are sitting, Hunter says he will drop the hammer and the WWF as you know is comes to an X-Rated END!

Backstage: The Nation are standing by, Rocky is now holding the small IC title that I grew up on. He tells JR to shut his damn mouth and know his role, but the fact is this. Ken Shamrock tried to end his career last night. The Rock can hardly walk right and has been spitting up blood, but it doesn't really matter because he's still here like the man and a half that he is. He's got a big hand, and that means he's gonna lay the smack down on him tonight. He says Faarooq showed The Rock something he should have seen a long time ago, and he's grateful to him for opening his eyes. He's the reason he's here and has been successful and is still the IC champion, and after tonight, he guarandamntees that the Nation will be the strongest it's ever been.

WELCOME TO THE WARZONE!

Faarooq & The Rock (w/The Nation of Domination) vs. Ken Shamrock & Steve Blackman
Faarooq works 100% of this match and gets his ass kicks for 99% of it. He hits a desperation spinebuster but Rocky refuses to tag in and leaves. Ken then hits the belly-2-belly and covers for the win.

After the Match; Faarooq gets on the mic and says he told Rocky, punk, that no boy grows up to be a man when they cross him. Since he likes high fashion clothes and jewelry, he's got a good ass whooping for him to wear. Rocky comes back to the ring and they go nose to nose. The Nation members get and try to calm it down but it leads to blows. Eventually, officials and refs pull them apart and Rocky leaves he walks up the ramp. Faarooq gets back on the mic and says it ain't over. Rock then raises his eyebrow and Mark, Kama and D'Lo attack Faarooq from behind. They beat him down, and Rock comes back to hit Faarooq with the Rock Bottom. He takes the mic and he says there's a reason The Rock don't ever want him to think he was ever the leader of The Nation. The Rock is not only the leader, but he's the RULER of the Nation of Domination.

Triple H and Chyna come down to the ring, minus Shawn Michaels. Hunter says says a lot can happen in twenty-four hours. Let's start with Mike Tyson. must have asked a thousand times if he's locked in, apart of us, really with us? What he heard was "Don't worry, kid, I've got it covered.", "You worry too much.", and "Let me make the decisions." WELL, YOU DROPPED THE BALL! But don't worry HBK, because Triple H picked it up and now it's in his court. He'll take care of the worries and problems and he'll make the decisions. This is the genesis of D-Generation X. Tonight in front of the world, he forms the DX Army to take care of business that should have been taken care of right from the start. When you start an army you look to your blood. You look to your buddies and friends. You look to the KLIQ!

Triple H says when you've been an indentured servant for two years, you run up a lot of feelings. Talk to em' KID! First things first, he's got a little something-something to get off his chest right now. He heard Hulk Hogan come out on TV and say he couldn't cut the mustard. HULK HOGAN, YOU SUCK, PAL! He better not stop short of Eric Bischoff will go so far up his ass, he'll know what he had for breakfast, He's sitting at home and he gets a call from one of his best friends, Triple H, and he says DX needs his help. Any time he ever needs anything from him, he's got it. Kevin Nash and Scott Hall would be right here with them if they weren't being held hostage by WCW and that's a fact. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. This is a new beginning for DX and they're here to rip ass on the WWF and it starts tonight. SUCK IT!

VAL VENIS IS CUMING!

TAKA Michinoku is in the ring when Mero and Sable come out, Luna shorty comes out after on the stage. Luna comes out and challenges Sable to a match and Sable accepts, Luna then says she wants a special match, an Evening Gown Match. Luna says she's going to strip her down to her bra and panties that is if you even wear any, YOU LITTLE SLUT! Sable says it'll be her pleasure to kick her ass again.

TAKA Michinoku vs. Marc Mero (w/Sable)
FUCKIN MERO SQUASH! UGH!

After the match; Sable and Mero argue all the way to the back..........WHEN 3 JAPANESE GUYS JUMP THE RAILS AND BEAT DOWN TAKA! Before hopping the rails and leaving. IT'S HAPPENING@~!

Jim Cornette is in the ring and introduces Dan "THE BEAST" SEVERN

NWA World Tag Team Championship: The Headbangers vs. The New Midnight Express
Not good, no effort by both teams they kinda just do stuff until the finish. The MNEX hit the rocket launcher and win the titles. After the match; Severn takes down both Headbangers with suplexes and applies a submission to one until Cornette calls it off.

HOLY SHIT! Austin uses his one phone call to call into the show He says he ain't calling a lawyer and says to tell Vince that he's a sorry son of a bitch. Vince's ASS belongs to Stone Cold, and next week Vince is gonna find out how pissed of Austin is. Austin 3:16 says he just whipped his ass, and that's what's gonna happen.

The Blue cage is being set up......WHEN THE LIGHTS GO OUT! Kane and Paul Bearer come out to the stage. Paul says for Undertaker to behold his brother. Did he believe last night after the three count that it was all over? Did he think so? He's looking at his flesh and blood. The only man to ever kick out of his famous Tombstone, NOT ONCE BUT TWICE! The Undertaker has had to change deep down inside that cold cold heart. He's faced his flesh and blood one on one. He beat him all over that ring last night and the whole world seen it. He cowered in the corner as his brother put his fist against his skull. Last night, he put himself in bed and shut his eyes and he was proud. But, he was awoken at 2 am by a dream. In that dream he saw a wrestling ring, he saw it surrounded by fire. In that ring, he saw Kane all alone. He challenges The Undertaker to step into his dream and the fire to face his brother one more time. In order to win, either he or Kane will have to catch fire. The loser must catch fire. AN INFERNO! UNFORGIVEN! IN YOUR HOUSE.

Footage airs of earlier today Funk has a bruise on his hip the size of a stretched out hand.

Steel Cage match for the WWF Tag Team Championships: Cactus Jack & Chainsaw Charlie vs. The New Age Outlaws
Short but awesome, they brawl for a few minutes until The Outlaws handcuff Funk to the cage by his neck. So Cactus works this alone. He takes a sick backdrop into the steel bars and also gets flapjacked into it too. Jack fights back and sends both men into the cage, but as he tries to climb out even though it's pin or submission. DX runs out, Kid then nails Jack 3 times in the head with a chair knocking him out. And the Outlaws hit the spike piledriver onto the chair for the win. **1/2

​

After the match; Chyna, Kid, and Hunter get in. They join in beating up Cactus. Hunter hits the pedigree as the crowd chant for AUSTIN! They send him to the corner and Kid hits the Bronco Buster Gunn and Road Dogg do the SUCK IT! Taunt. Triple H kills Cactus with his own SUCK chair shot to the head as the new DX celebrates to end the show.

WOW, WHAT A FUCKING SHOW!

 

[Chris]

First Val promo and Kai en tai debut on the same night

 

[Cwalker]

Wow Val Venus debuted in 98; I actually forgot that. A shame he peaked in 98 too

 

[Deezy]

Never liked Val Venis.....Only peaked when he did a vignette with Jenna Jameson.

 

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF RAW is WAR
April 6th, 1998
Syracuse, New York

Vince McMahon comes down to the ring, he says last week on RAW when he had Austin arrestest was the toughest professional decision he's ever had to make. He'd like to let you all know he's had second thoughts about it and as a result of his benevolence, Mr. Austin was released later that night. Nonetheless, Stone Cold has learned his lesson, and learnt it the hard way and no longer will Stone Cold be considered a foul-mouthed beer swilling trash talking blue collar WWF Champion. Tonight could very well be the proudest moment in his professional career as you see a new and improved Stone Cold Steve Austin right here in this very ring. He'll guarantee it, or your money back.

Dan Severn (w/Jim Cornette) vs. Flash Funk
It's okay, but it's a worked shoot match. Dan has some nice throws but his open palm strikes look ridiculous. Dan wins with a pretty cool armbar.

In the stairway, DX are making a bunch of noise.

D-Generation X make their way down to the ring, Cole and JR mention the KID is now X-Pac. Hunter says last week he came in this ring and promised the world a revolution and a change. He promised an army, and let's get this straight I live up to all my promises. Dogg says does the full intro which still rulez. He says there's been a marriage made in heaven and you're looking at it. This is combined and comprised of the youngest and most capable athletes in their business today. Pac says he's gonna make this short and sweet, if you came to see grumpy old men stinking the joint up, you came to the wrong place. This is DX and they're getting jiggy with it. Hunter says if the WWF want a war, you got it. This is the army and HIS bazooka is locked, cocked, and ready to unload. SUCK IT.

Backstage: DX bully one of the stagehands as they spraypaint DX on the RAW set, and beat him up.

Steve Blackman vs. Brian Christopher
Tennessee Lee comes down during the match to do commentary, and he announces that at Unforgiven, he's bringing country band Sawyer Brown to backup Double J in a concert. As for the match, it's a basic Blackman showcase, Brian is garbage as usual with his hokey Memphis actions. Blackman locks on a stretch for the win.

After the Match; Tennessee Lee comes back out. He calls for the lights to be dimmed so he can introduce J.E.DOUBLE F J.A.DOUBLE R.E.DOUBLE T. The lights come back on AND JARRETT SNEAKS IN FROM THE CROWD AND BREAKS THE GUITAR OVER BLACKMAN! Jeff gets on the mic and says that's a smash hit.

In the parking lot, Triple H triple dog dares the Outlaws and Pac to piss on DOA's bikes. And they do.

Cactus Jack makes his way down to the ring, as they replay last weeks main event. Cactus is in a neckbrace and is carrying a chair. He says says he's always taken a lot of chances in the ring and some very bad things have happened to him over the years but he's always had the comfort of knowing that when he looked at his career and dreams and things he'd done and set his heart on that it was always worth the pain. But I'll be damned if he'll let a group of scum like DX put Cactus Jack away. Terry Funk's not here and he hasn't talked to him apart from a message on his answering machine. They DON'T miss wrestling matches, so if the Funker was hurt enough to go home, it must have been pretty bad. People will always debate who the greatest of all time, but everyone knows Terry is the gutsiest old bastard they've seen in their lives. And you've probably seen Terry's back and you saw WrestleMania and later that night, Terry was lying on his back with the title belt and a smile and said it had all been worth it, but they don't have those belts now. He won't get into the reason why but when Cactus Jack was laying there, conscious and finding it hard to move, he looked to Terry and heard something that made him sick. There was an announcement to end the show, saying something about Stone Cold, and people started chanting his name. When he came here two years ago as Mankind, people wanted him to be Cactus Jack. He came out in tie-dye and white boots, and they just wanted him to be Cactus Jack. "WELL, I GAVE YOU CACTUS JACK. I GAVE YOU EVERY GOD DAMNED BIT OF ENERGY HE HAD, AND WHEN I WAS LAYING THERE HELPLESS, YOU CHANTED SOMEONE ELSE'S NAME". This is not a knock on Stone Cold, he's happy he's the champion, but what everyone did to he and Terry Funk was disgraceful, disrespectful, and god damned disgusting. He says he'll accept a group apology right now. He says he can finally say that after 13 years that it's not worth it anymore, and it's gonna be a long time before you see Cactus Jack in the ring again.

JR ~ Cactus, Goodbye and thank you.

Earlier today, The Nation attacked Faarooq as he entered the building. They all take turns beating him up.

The Nation of Domination come down to the ring, Rock grabs the mic and says "FINALLY, THE PEOPLE'S CHAMP HAS RETURNED HOME TO SYRACUSE!" HOLY SHIT! It's started.

WWF Intercontinental Championship: The Rock vs. Owen Hart
Good stuff, for the most part, Owen guides Rock through the mat wrestling sequence to start. Kama trips Owen from the floor, and gets on the apron to the ref sends the Nation to the back. Owen goes to lock in a sleeper, but Rocky counters into a DDT and takes over. He hits a dope shoulderbreaker before hitting the People's elbow for two. Owen makes a comeback, he hits the enzuiguri before putting on the Sharpshooter. But, Chyna runs down with a ball bat and nails Owen in the back for the DQ. **1/4

WELCOME TO THE WARZONE!

Vince McMahon comes down to the ring, with two cops. He then presents to us the NEW AND IMPROVED WWF CHAMPION...STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN! Austin comes out in a suit, but also has his Austin hat on. He goes to climb the turnbuckles but Vince says no so Austin just raises his fist into the air Vince says he's overwhelmed and this is the first step in him becoming the greatest WWF champion of all time. He knows this wasn't easy and will take a lot of hard work and yells at the fans to be quiet. He thanks Austin and says it's a step in the right direction. He says they talked about attire from head to toe through and this is still a work in progress. He asks about the Gucci shoes like they discussed, and Austin says the damn things were too tight, so he put on his wrestling boots. Vince says this is about compromise and takes off Austin's hat because it doesn't go with the suit. Austin throws it to the crowd and says that was a damn good hat. Vince says to give it up to the new and improved Steve Austin, he asks Austin when was the moment he had to accept reality. Austin says when he was sitting in jail, and they wouldn't bring him his bread and water, he started to think what does he have to compete with a Vince McMahon and leader, and billionaire while he, on the other hand, is just a redneck from Texas. So, as I sat there and said, Steve, do you think you have what it takes to compete with Vince, give me a hell yeah. But, I had to say HELL NO! You got to understand the power a Vince has, so he asks one of the officers to capture this moment. They then take pictures together to commemorate this with Austin's camera. He says the old Steve Austin would tell him to shove this camera up his ass, and the new Stone Cold wants him to go and get that film developed BECAUSE THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE LAST TIME YOU WILL EVER SEE STONE COLD WEARING A RIDICULOUS SUIT LIKE THIS SON OF A BITCH I GOT ON! Austin rips off the suit, Austin says he told him what you see is what you get. He's a redneck from South Texas, and he ain't' gonna change for nobody. He takes his pants off and says he told him before, DTA, Don't Trust Anybody, AND BACKHANDS VINCE IN THE DICK. AND TAKES THE CAMERA AND TAKES A PICTURE OF VINCE BENT OVER HOLDING HIS GROIN. Stone Cold ain't gonna change for anybody, and that's the bottom line cause Stone Cold Said So.

The DOA come down to the ring, Skull yells this ain't some bullshit high school game for DX to play, and if they got the balls to piss on their bikes, they should have the balls to face them tonight.

Luna is supposed to have an intergender match, but TAFKA Goldust who is dressed as Goldust attacks him. He hits the Curtain Call before the ref rings the bell.

Matt Knowles vs. Luna (w/The Artest Formerly Known As Goldust)
Luna hits a diving headbutt to the dick for the win.

Val Venis vignette airs. He says in his latest film, As Hard As It Gets. He says ladies he really rises to the occasion. Ladies, when he gets up for a role, he NEVER comes down. Ladies, when Val Venis enters the WWF, it'll be a scream.

JR tells us DX has accepted the DOA's challenge.

Marc Mero and Sable come down to the ring, Mero says he allowed Sable to have the spotlight at WrestleMania, but now GET THE HELL OUT OF HIS FACE!

King is lowkey a genius he keeps saying no one is rooting for Sable to win the evening gown match, which is true cause if she wins then Luna is forced into her bra and panties. But the way he says it is like he hates hers.

Marc Mero vs. Ken Shamrock
FUCK YEAH! they trade body blows, but Mero starts feeling himself a bit too much and debuts these awful jabs. Sadly it all goes downhill after that, they just trade stuff until the Nation run down, but Ken sees it coming so he grabs a chair as the Nation surround the ring. Mark attacks Ken from behind, leading to a 4-1 beating. Mark his the splash, and D'Lo hits the Low Down off the top. Rocky grabs the mic and says according to the People's Champ, and the ruler of the Nation, this is the dawn of a new era. A new Nation and a new domination. He stomps Ken in the midsection and the Nation leaves.

Kevin Kelly is in the ring and introduces The Undertaker. Kelly asks him about the punishment he took at Mania, and asks if his body can take anymore at Unforgiven. Taker says at Mania, Kane found out, not only am I his brother, but I am the lord of darkness. As big and strong as Kane is, he did give him the beating like nobody else ever has. But what he has to realize is that the soul powers the body. Kane's is un-pure, but his is, and he was defeated. Kelly asks about Paul Bearers' challenge, he says and Taker says what they have are desperate men resorting to desperate actions. But just like when they were children when he beat him at will, whether there's fire in the ring, outside the ring, or in between them, and when he looks up at him at Unforgiven and his body is on fire, it will be the beginning of his eternal damnation. KANE AND PAUL BEARER ARE ON THE TRON! Paul and Kane are at Taker's parent's graveyard. Paul Bearer says two weeks ago, Undertaker delivered his performance at the grave site of his poor dead parents. The parents that he murdered in a blaze of glory. Bearer says he will ensure The Undertaker dies a slow agonizing death at Unforgiven. First, his Kane will beat him senseless, and then he will set him ablaze. Kane smashes the tombstone and Paul says they will send him straight to hell, and Kane sets the gravesite on fire.

D-Generation X (Triple H & The New Age Outlaws w/X-Pac & Chyna) vs. The DOA
X-Pac joins commentary, this gets 5 minutes or so, DOA run out and they have a shitty brawl for a minute before the match settles down. Gunn's bumping is on 100 here, he's trying the best to make the biker fags offense look passable. DX gets a brief second on heat, but it gets all cut due to the commercial and we cut right back into a Chainz hot tag. He cleans house as all hell breaks loose. Hunter sneaks in a pedigree and covers for the win. **

After the Match; DX all have chairs and they proceed to beat the hell out of DOA with them. The Outlaws hit a spike piledriver onto a chair until LOD 2000 run out making the save. EVERYONE BRAWLS~!

 

[Chris]

The mid/lower card feuds get way better after 'Mania from what I remember. Matches still pretty meh but the angles are fun af usually, I remember Blackman/Jarrett being a pretty good one.

 

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF RAW is WAR
April 13th, 1998
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

FUCK YEAH! This debuts
​

Stone Cold Steve Austin comes down to the ring, He says what he wants to do right now is to get something straightened out between Stone Cold and one Vince McMahon, and he might as well bring his ass down here right now because he knows he'll sit in this ring and hold up the whole damn show. He gives him his word he won't knock his damn lights out, Austin says as WWF champion, he ain't gonna wear is stupid suits or leaves his ring. Vince reluctantly comes out with Brisco and Patterson.....BUT HE HAS TWO ARMORED POLICE too. Austin says he wants to know who he's fighting at the next PPV. Vince says he hasn't made up his mind yet, Austin says Austin asks if he's just not going to tell him, and Vince says it takes great deliberation. Vince says he'll know soon. Austin says he can tell Vince can't stand anything about him. He likes to drink a few beers, uses "colorful language", and gives him the finger. He can't stand the way he dresses and isn't what a WWF Champion is supposed to be. He thinks it's supposed to be someone with an Ivy League education, speaks the proper language, NEVER EVER uses a four-letter word, and certainly not someone with his use of sign language. Someone with polish and manners and that ain't him. But it sounds like what he wants in the WWF Champion isn't just someone like Vince McMahon, but it sounds like HE wants to be the WWF Champion. Vince asks where he's going with this and Austin asks how he felt with this new belt after it got delivered to him. He probably walked around the house and posed with it and asked his wife how it looked. She probably said he looked like a jackass because he did. So what he's gonna do tonight is put the WWF title on the line. LOOK AT ME! You're probably wondering who my opponent will be and that is.................MR. VINCE MCMAHON! Austin asks him if he accepts the challenge or not. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Easy way is Vince handpicks an official, comes down here and fights him. The fact of the matter is, he could probably beat him with one hand tied behind his back. The hard way is he handpicks one of these cameramen, take him backstage, and beats your ass in front of the world anyway. He says he'll give him thirty minutes to make up his mind, and he ain't going nowhere. Neither is Vince because his limo driver's been beaten up and he's got four flat tires. And that's the bottom line, cause Stone Cold said so.

Backstage: A cameraman catches Vince talking to Patterson and Brisco around the corner. Brisco says he has to do it and Patterson says Austin is making fun of him and making a fool of him. He has to stop it tonight, and they know he can do it. Brisco says he's challenged him everywhere and Vince broke the rest of them, so he can break him.

DX come down to ringside.

Chain Match: DOA (Skull & 8 Ball) vs. Savio Vega & Jose Estrada
Welp, Russo's in charge now. Fuckin' random gimmick match. This gets maybe 2 minutes at matx, it's al punches, kicks and chain choking until Gunn and Chainz brawl on the floor. DX then kill him with chair shots and Hunter hits a pedigree on the chair. They follow up with a piledriver on a chair on the ramp lool. DX then enter the ring and attack the other two members of DOA, ref then calls for a bell in a CHAIN MATCH! Get the fuck out.

It's 6-2, and they clear the ring of DOA. Los Boricuas celebrate with them even doing the DX SUCK IT! But Chyna low blows them from behind and DX beat the shit out of them too.

Backstage: Shane is now with Vince, Brisco, and Patterson. Shane tries to be the voice of reason saying they don't understand and Vince gave him a life lesson and he can get hurt. Vince starts to get upset and asks if he's saying he can't take Austin, and then they all begin to talk over each other.

Aguila, Pantera, Lawlers Kid and Scott Tayler are all in the ring, but Vince comes out. He says for over 50 years, the WWF has been a part of his heritage. His grandfather and father and him and he hopes it carries on to his son and daughter, and their children. AND TRIPLE H The WWF is about honor and integrity, qualities that are sorely lacking in their current WWF Champion. Stone Cold Steve Austin has no honor and no integrity. He knows this decision will not sit well those who have preceded him, but sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. WILL I FIGHT STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN, IN THIS RING TONIGHT! THE ANSWER IS? OH HELL YEAH!

JR leaves commentary and says he's going to do what he can to make sure this does not happen.

Aguila, Pantera, Lawlers Kid and Scott Tayler go back into the ring...................BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT! But, it's The Undertaker. He kills them all with Chokeslams and Tombstones. Taker grabs a mic, and says it's time Kane's big brother shows him what evil is all about. No longer is he the hunter, but now he's the hunted. He can feel his presence in the building and this night will go on for an eternity until he shows his face. It's time to come out from the darkness.

Backstage: Kevin Kelly shows us footage of JR, Shane, Brisco and Patterson all talking to Vince. JR says that Vince is not a wrestler. Vince says this is happening and tells Shane to go to the car and get his gym bag and tells JR to go do his job. JR leaves and Shane says this is the dumbest decision Vince has ever made.

During Jeff Jarrett's entrance pamphlets fall from the rafters, hyping up Jeff's performance at Unforgiven.

TAKA Michinoku vs. Jeff Jarrett (w/Tennessee Lee)
During the match, Cole interviews Blackman who's standing by in the back. Blackman says he will be getting revenge it might be tonight, next week or at the PPV. But Revenge will be sweet. And leaves, JR is back but Lee also joins Commentary to hype Jarrett's concert at the PPV. This goes for a few minutes until "Club Kamazakie" attack TAKA for the DQ. They do all their stuff to TAKA before bailing through the crowd again. Jeff then locks in the Figure-Four.

JR interviews Austin, Austin says he's not surprised Vince accepted his challenge, cause he didn't give him much choice. He can get his ass beat in the ring or in the back. He told everyone he was gonna settle this tonight and that's what he's did.

Backstage: Patterson and Brisco are teaching Vince counters out of the stunner.

Faarooq comes out to NEW RAP music, he also has his ribs taped up. He says he knows Rocky is back here and can see him standing here tonight. Sure, he cracked a rib and bruised his body, but it takes a lot more than that to kick his ass. He knows that he gave all of them the chance of a lifetime and him being a man of chance, he'll give Rock ANOTHER chance to finish kicking his ass right now, and calls them out here. The Nation comes out, Rock says he comes out here and runs his mouth and tries to call all the shots like he's the champ like he's The Rock. But obviously, he's not. The Rock understands that he's still half ignorant from the beating last week, so he needs to try and smell what The Rock is gonna cook tonight in Philadelphia. The Rock has a very big hand, and that means he's gonna lay the smack down on him whenever he damn well pleases. There are only two things he can do about that, nothing and like it. Faarooq raises his fist, but Rocky laughs. Ken Shamrock and Steve Blackman come out behind them. They chase the Nation into the ring and Faarooq leaves the ring. Everyone brawls until refs and agents break it up.

FUCK YEAH! RIP Chainsaw Charlie, TERRY FUNK IS HERE!

Funk grabs the mic and says he's here tonight to announce a NEW partner because Cactus Jack waddled out last week and proclaimed to the world that he was quitting. I CAN GIVE A DAMN WHAT THE FANS CHANT! I'm not quitting. And I'm gonna put some Funk in your and everyone's faces. My partner is hardcore, he's always been hardcore. He's never been given a chance by Vince but I will. Bring out the FUNK! Flash Funk comes out in 2 Cold attire. Cole dubs him "2 COLD FUNK"

The Quebecers vs. Terry Funk & 2 Cold Funk
Sadly, this is like 2 minutes, Quebecers isolate 2 Cold for a minute with some cool double teams. Funk doesn't get a hot tag he just chases one away allowing 2 Cold to hit the 450 for the win.

Luna comes out wearing a sailor outfit. She says the anticipation of Unforgiven is worse than PMS. FACT IS! The flow of her adrenaline is so severe that she wants to settle it right now.


WELCOME TO THE WARZONE!

TAFKA Goldust comes out in an old woman dress and mocks Sable's accent and calls Luna little bitch, and says she's gonna kick her ass. Luna then beats up Sabledust. Sable then comes out for the catfight and try and tear each other's clothes off until refs and agents break it up.

Backstage: Austin is putting on his ring gear.

Ken Shamrock & Steve Blackman vs. The New Midnight Express (w/Jim Cornette)
Ken is limping down to the ring, Ken and Dan have a pre-match staredown so the ref sends Dan to the back. Ken's ankle is clearly bothering him a lot so Blackman does 90% of the work, NME has a shitty iso period cause they are shit. Ken's hot tag is okay, but again the ankle holds him back. All hell breaks loose and the ref calls for the double DQ fuckery.

Backstage: Brisco and Patterson are still hyping Vince up, as Kevin Kelly interviews them. He asks Vince about the match and if he's afraid. He says he'd be lying if he didn't admit to butterflies in his stomach. He's proven he's not afraid of the government and he's not afraid of Ted Turner and Time Warner. He's not afraid of the big bad wolf, and he sure as hell is not afraid of Stone Cold Steve Austin.

The Headbangers are in the ring..................AND THE LIGHTS GO OUT! It's The Undertaker again. He destroys them with Chokeslams. THE LIGHTS THEN GO OUT AGAIN AND KANE'S MUSIC HITS! Kane and Paul Bearer come out onto the stage, Paul says asks if he wants his little brother and if he can't wait for Unforgiven. He says this happens on Paul Bearer's terms and says next week on Raw, he'll face his brother, but not in that ring. He's going to meet him and Kane in the cemetery, since he's so worried about what his dead momma and daddy are thinking. He can fight them right on their damn graves, and they'll leave him there and send him back to HELL where he belongs.

Val Venis stuff, he says he's been doing casting for his next film, entitled Lust in Space. The TV show was good, but he has a rocket in his pocket that will take each and every woman on this planet to new and exciting heights. He sits on a couch with two ladies and says to call it Venis Envy. When he explodes inside the WWF, he'll give it his all, inch by inch.

D-Generation X comes down to the ring, Gunn is the only one in-ring attire. Owen Hart then comes out. He says he's supposed to face one of them and wants to know who it is. Hunter says everyone wanted to beat Owen up, so he had everyone in DX write a 500-word essay on who should get to kick his ass. He read all of them. His was a little "Headstrong" if you know what he means. Road Dogg's was in zig zags, X-Pac's should have printed in an adult magazine or something. Chyna's was TOO violent for national TV. But the winner was Billy Gunn's because it came in a clear plastic binder it came with, along with illustrations of Owen and a small barnyard animal, SUCK IT! Owen makes his way down to the ring, but LOD 2000 come out.

Billy Gunn (w/D-Generation X) vs. Owen Hart (w/LOD 2000 & Sunny)
Pac and Hunter join commentary, Hunter says if Vince has enough cheese DX will help. They bury LOD and everyone else for 4 minutes. Owen/Gunn is decent but they don't really put much effort in, DX and LOD almost get into a fight but it gets settled down as we go to another break, when we return we cut right into the finish with Owen winning with a schoolboy. *3/4

FUCK YEAH! MAIN EVENT BACKSTAGE WALK! Vince is walking with Patterson, Brisco, and Sarge. People all in the back watching him walk. Vince and Co come down to the ring, he doesn't have any music. Shane McMahon comes out to try one more time to talk him out of it, but it doesn't work, so they make him leave. Stone Cold Steve Austin comes out, to a huge pop. They face off, AND VINCE SLAPS AUSTIN! The ref backs Austin off and Vince gets on the mic. He says Austin said he can beat him with one arm tied behind his back. Vince pulls out a piece of rope and asks Austin if he's a man of his word and Austin has his right arm tied behind his back. Vince makes sure it's the stunner arm too Austin is ready and Vince stalls a ton. He has Brisco give him a mouthpiece................BUT, DUDE LOVE COMES OUT! He wants to know if they can't all just get along. He's gotta level with Philadelphia because he doesn't feel a whole lot of love here tonight. There's only one cat who can bring peace to the War Zone, and that's Dude Love. He says he knows Austin wants to put the boots to Vince, but the Dude has got to put the veto to this one because Vince writes the checks that let the Dude live the kind of life that the Dude likes to love. Uncle Vinny is his McMain Man. He says when Vince looks at Steve Austin, he's looking at the world's toughest SOB, but Vince shoves Dude. Dude tries the Mandible Claw, but Austin comes over, AND DUDE APPLIES THE MANDIBLE CLAW TO AUSTIN! Dude gets on the mic and says when he puts a cat down, he stays down. Dude beats down on Austin while he has one hand tied behind his back. Vince is held back by his squad and Dude puts the claw back on. From the floor, Vince yells at Dude for stealing his spotlight. Dude gets on the mic and says if Vince wants a piece, he can step on in. Shane, agents, and refs all bring Vince to the back and Austin tries to fight back on the floor with one arm, but Dude throws him into the rails and on top of the commentary table to end the show.

EXTRA ATTITUDE!

Dude gets back on the mic and says Austin isn't that tough after all. Dude leaves, as JR cuts Austin free. So, Austin marches to the back. But DX come out and attack Austin. They brawl back to the ring, KANE THEN COMES OUT TO JOIN IN! But LOD 2000 run out to make the save. Kane beats up Animal in the ring, as Hawk just watches on. THE UNDERTAKER COMES OUT AND HE FIGHTS HIS BROTHER! To the back. Austin is back up and he destroys Gunn and Pac on the floor as the faces all clear house and everyone brawls. Austin then stuns Dogg and a ref makes the three count, wait that was a dark match BRUH! Everyone leaves as Austin celebrates in the ring. He grabs the mic and says he came here to put the title on the line against Mr. McMahon but that chicken shit, bastard didn't come for a fight. But to dance, so he just has to do it next week. OH HELL YEAH!

 

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF RAW is WAR
April 20th, 1998
Nassau Coliseum: Long Island, New York

At the cemetery, Kevin Kelly is standing by, he says he doesn't know what to expect but Kane and Paul were here earlier.

Dude Loves comes out, JR announces that Dude Love is now the #1 Contender and will get a title match this Sunday at Unforgiven. Dude welcomes us to the Love Shack. Vince McMahon comes out, and says with one arm tied behind his back, he had an opportunity to humiliate and embarrass Stone Cold Steve Austin. And he prevented that. He's fining him $5,000 for interfering. He tells Dude not to ever interfere in his business again. Vince leaves and Dude says Cousin Vinny is an emotional man and it's been an emotional week. The WWF is buzzing, his cats and kitties, and people want to know why, dude why? Well, when the Dude made his way to the ring last week, he was merely trying to create a little peace, love, and understanding. But when he stood up to the big Vince MacDaddy, I was a victim of a sucker attack from behind. But now he asks the questions, like why his former tag team partner would commit such a heinous act. He says when he and Steve-O wore the gold, the Dude was a chick magnet, Stone Cold didn't do so well. He says he'll forget this title match and let bygones be forgotten if Steve comes out here and grovels on his knees. If he doesn't, then Unforgiven will be a long night. He always knew he could take him, but he never knew it would be THAT easy. Have mercy.

NEW NATION MUSIC

Long Island Street Fight: Kama Mustafa vs. Faarooq
I'm guessing Sarge came out during the commercial and told the Nation to watch from the stage, cause they all came out through the crowd. This is cool, Kama using a hammer on Faarooq's ribs to gain the advantage. Faarooq's selling is dope, heavy breathing, moving slow and just grabbing the ribs the whole time. JR dubs Kama "The GODFATHER" of the Nation. Faarooq takes off his boot and cuts off a hammer shot by hitting Kama with the boot and then hits the Spinebuster for the win. **1/4

Backstage: DX are watching them piss on DOA's bikes last week, Gunn says Triple H is the only one not doing it and he's the one always talking about his bazooka. Triple H sees the challenge and offers to whip it out right now. Gunn says he knows he will, but challenges him to whip it out in public so the world can see it, and challenges him to pee on something too, and Hunter says he'll go do it right now.

D-Generation X come down to the ring, Hunter has a long raincoat on. Pac yells if the crowd is with them to make some noise. He hands Hunter the mic, Hunter says DOA talked some trash, but they left with their heads up their ass. Dogg does his intro and says his daddy taught him a long time ago that you can polish a turd all day, but it's still a doo-doo, Hunter says they can chant for LOD and Skanky all day and they might come out. He says Owen can put Chyna in a cage above the ring but if she rips off the bars believe she will rip your head off and do something he doesn't want her to do. But no matter the match, between he and Owen, he owns him. Gunn says it's time for a little show and tell. Hunter pulls a super soaker out of his trenchcoat and shoots it into the crowd. LOD 2000 then comes out along with Owen. Hawk says they're a lot alike, but they always do what they say, and tonight, they're gonna walk the walk. Slaughter comes out to stop it and books a six-man tag team match.

Backstage: Vince is pacing back and forth.

At the cemetery, Kevin Kelly says he hears The Undertaker is a few minutes away.

Dan Severn (w/Jim Cornette) vs. Mosh (w/Thrasher)
Another Dan showcase, throws are good, strikes look like shit. He locks in an armbar/reverse keylock for the win.

JR yells something has happened at the cemetery, Kevin Kelly says Taker showed up and walked in and minutes later, he walked out irate and left again. He claims he heard a blood-curdling scream from inside, and Taker comes over and demands to know where they are. He says they're not in there and asked where they are, and he chokes Kelly before storming off again. Kelly speculates that he's coming back to the arena. So, Taker's parents are buried in Long Island. Why would Taker, a man from Death Valley have his parents buried in Long Island?

Luna and Goldust come out, Luna does her weekly Sable promo.

The Artist Formerly Known as Goldust (w/Luna) vs. Bradshaw
Standard 98 TV brawl, they do stuff until "Club Kamazakie" attack him for a DQ. They hold Bradshaw down, and one hits a back senton off the top.

WELCOME TO THE WARZONE!

Stone Cold Steve Austin comes down to the ring, he says last week he came out here and tried to find out who his opponent for the PPV was going to be, and he said he was still making his mind up. He was lying and he knows that, but he's lied plenty of times in the past, so that doesn't bother him. Then he tried to defend his title against him. But Dude Love that psychedelic jackass came out and put his fingers in his mouth and ruined the whole damn match. He's no rocket scientist, but if you ask Stone Cold, it's been a conspiracy between Vince McMahon and Dude Love all along. He says with one arm, Dude Love can beat his ass every day of the week. But he can bet his last bottom dollar, Stone Cold will always pick his ass up and beat his sorry ass, It might not always be the same day, but you can beat Stone Cold's getting his payback. Tonight before the show's over, he'll get his hands on Vince McMahon AND Dude Love. That's all he's got to say because Stone Cold's got some ass kick tonight, and that's the bottom line, cause Stone Cold said so.

In the parking lot, a Hearse arrives at the building.

Terry Funk & 2 Cold Scorpio vs. The New Midnight Express (w/Jim Cornette & Dan Severn)
Faces control early, until the NME isolate Funk who does his great Drunk Funk bumping and selling, NME just punch and kick away, they are shit. IDK if they have no chemistry and seem so basic. Funk makes a comeback with headbutts before tagging 2 Cold in. He cleans house. The match breaks down and the NME hit a piledriver on Funk before dropping him onto the apron, BRUH! I hate what#s happen to the piledriver in 1998, that shit is some filler move. 2 Cold misses a moonsault but comeback like 2 seconds later and hits a 450 for the win. *3/4

After the match; Dan hits 2 Cold with a belly-2-belly, but Funk grabs a chair and Jim forces Dan to leave.

The hearse is still in the parking lot, wait did he just spend the past 8 minutes trying to park

Val Venis shit, He covers up with a towel and says he's a little shy. There's nothing like a hot shower after a hard day's night. When Val Venis comes, there will be no stopping him. Two ladies step out of the shower and towel off while rubbing up on him. He tells all the ladies to get their rest now, while they can.

Michael Cole is in the ring and introduces Sable who looks amazing in this blue evening gown. Cole asks about what Luna and Goldust did last week and asks her about her thoughts on Luna promo from earlier tonight. Sable says this body won't humiliate her. She could care less if Luna strips her of every stitch of clothes on her body, as long as she gets her hands on her. She could care less if she's wearing anything or nothing at all.

In the parking lot, Kane and Paul Bearer step out of the hearse.

Backstage: Cole asks Vince McMahon about the conspiracy allegations. Vince says he would suggest that Mr. Austin has been watching too many Oliver Stone movies and he doesn't want to dignify that with a response. Cole asks about Austin's threat to get him tonight. Vince says he was ready for him last week, and he'll be ready for him this week.

D-Generation X (Triple H & The New Age Outlaws w/X-Pac & Chyna) vs. Owen Hart & LOD 2000 (w/Sunny)
This gets over 5 minutes so that's cool, Owen seems somewhat motivated and has a great interaction with Hunter and Gunn. DX isolate Animal who refuses to bump for anything and just runs through all DX's shit, I like that they tease Owen/Hunter the whole time. Whenever Owen tags in Hunter with run and bail. We return from break with DX now in control of Owen, and now Hunter gets in. Owen goes for the sharpshooter but Dogg distracts the ref allowing Gunn to hit a sweet DDT and DX take over again, Dogg debuts the shake knee drop. Owen fights back and Animal gets the hot tag, he cleans house as shit breaks down. The ref deals with Owen and Hunter fighting on the floor and LOD hit the Doomsday Device on Road Dogg. Chyna grabs Sunny on the floor and Hawk goes out to try and get her free. X-Pac sneaks in and hits Animal with a chair to the back and Gunn hits the Piledriver for the win. **1/4

In the parking lot, Kane and Bearer pull a pair of dirty old wooden caskets out of the hearse and Bearer says it's a beautiful day for momma and daddy. They wheel them away as Paul Bearer starts singing "DIGGING UP BONES! DIGGING UP BONES!"

Kane and Paul Bearer come out with Taker's mom and dad's casket. Bearer says he's here for one reason and believe it or not, he's here for The Undertaker. When his parents perished in the fire that he set, by the way, he didn't get to attend their funeral, so he decided that Kane and himself would go and dig up his poor old momma and daddy and bring them right here so Undertaker can have a funeral for his parents. "LOOK AT THE CHEAP CASKETS I BURIED THEM IN. I PICKED THE CHEAPEST PINE BOXES I COULD FIND" He says this is Undertaker's fault, so Undertaker's music hits and he comes through the crowd. Paul calls for Kane to pour the gas as Taker marches up the ramp. Taker says they'll die a thousand deaths if they light that. KANE LIGHTS ONE OF THEM ON FIRE! TAKER RUNS UP, AND KANE CHOKESLAMS HIM THROUGH THE OTHER CASKET ONTO THE BONES! Bearer yells "REST IN PEACE WITH YO DEAD MOMMA!" This is the greatest feud ever Bearer is the greatest.

They leave and Taker is slow to get up.

Michael Cole is in the parking lot, he says Paul and Kane left while Taker is with the remains of his parents and he'll never forget the look on his face.

Vince McMahon comes out and joins commentary.

Steve Blackman vs. Dude Love
Angle match, Vince says something catastrophic will happen at the PPV or your money back. He says he will be at ringside for SOME of the event. JR presses him into saying he will be at ringside for the World Title match. Vince also hints that Earl Hebner has recovered and will ref the match. JR puts the pieces together but trolls it. Dude locks in an abdominal stretch and the bell rings.

Tim White and Blackman are both confused, and Vince claims he clearly gave up because the bell rung. Blackman goes out and the timekeeper claims he gave up, so Blackman judo throws him. Vince goes to check on him, but Austin runs out and attacks Dude. He then bolts to the floor and puts the boots to Vince. Dude and Austin fight on the floor and Patterson and Brisco come out. Austin goes back in and hits Patterson and Brisco with stunners as Vince bails. Dude is back up and brawls again with Austin, but Austin wins that and chases Vince to the back.

 

[Chris]

Bearer really was the goat in 98

 

[Chris]

Bearer really was the goat in 98

 

[Cwalker]

That 97/98 Kane-Taker angle was amazing. I just wished the matches lived up to the build

 

[Deezy]

If you ever saw Dan Severn in the UFC, you'd understand why his work punches looked like shit.

 

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF In Your House: Unforgiven
April 26th, 1998
Greensboro Coliseum: Greensboro, North Carolina

The Nation of Domination (w/Kama Mustafa) vs. Faarooq, Steve Blackman & Ken Shamrock
D'Lo and Blackman have a fun exchange to start the match, Faarooq whipping the black off D'Lo's skin is the greatest, especially as JR tells the story of how Faarooq brought D'Lo into the WWF and Faarooq was D'Lo's role model. The faces control for the majority for the first 5 minutes or so, Mark gets in and turns the tide but as soon as he tags back out the faces again take over. D'Lo manages to cut Faarooq off so he tags Rocky in for the first time to get some shots in on Faarooq. Nation work over both Faarooq and Blackman, Kinda weird that Ken only has like 20 seconds of ring time, he doesn't even get the hot tag, Faarooq does. The match breaks down and Faarooq hits the DOMINATOR on Rocky for the win. **1/4

After the Match; Michael Cole interviews Faarooq, he asks him how happy he is after this win and Faarooq says very, he thanks Ken and Steve and says this is just the beginning of kicking the Rocks ass.

Stone Cold Steve Austin comes out to the ringside area and grabs the microphone. He brings the timekeeper Mark Yeaton in the ring and asks him if Vince told him to ring the bell last week. Mark says he rang the bell when he was told to. He says if Vince McMahon screws him tonight for that title after he finishes beating his ass up and down EVERY single one of these aisles, he'll drag his carcass up each and every one of those aisles do the same to him. He says if he doesn't ring the bell when Vince tells him to, he might get fired, but he can find another job. But if he don't fire him and he helps screw over Steve Austin, it'll be hard to find another life, because he'll beat his ass so bad he'll never work again. So, he' got a tough decision, so he can take your scruffy ass back and sit in his chair, and think about that all night. Austin says he doesn't mind if Dude Love is good enough to beat his ass and take his title, but if he gets screwed by he and Vince McMahon, he and Vince both get their ass whipped. And that's the bottom line, cause Stone Cold said so.

WWF European Championship: Triple H vs. Owen Hart [Chyna is Suspended Above The Ring in a Shark Cage]
So, as Hunter is getting Chyna into the cage Owen attacks him from behind and beats him up, up the entrance way, down the entrance way and around ringside. It's like 6 minutes of just Owen destroying him and mid-card Hunter bumping for everything. The bell eventually rings and Chyna is lifted into the air. Hunter whether the early storm before sending him face first into the middle turnbuckle and he takes over. Hunter works on the head and neck which Owen actually sells unlike that shitty Ankle stuff from the Mania. At one point, the camera picks up Chyna using a file to saw at the rails but she drops it Hunter uses a dragon sleeper was cool. Chyna eventually bends the bars as Owen makes a comeback, she proceeds to climb out to the outside of the cage. So the cameraman focuses on that instead of the match. Owen locks in the Sharpshooter as the cage is lowered, so he breaks the hold. JR informs us Road Dogg lowered the cage from the back, Sarge and the ref is being restrained from the ring, as Owen hits the pedigree, but Pac runs through the crowd and hits Owen in the back of the head with a fire extinguisher and Hunter covers for the win. **3/4

After the Match; Michael Cole interviews Owen Hart, he says another loss to Triple H and DX has his number. Owen says "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE! THIS BULLSHIT'S GOTTA END. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! AND THINGS HAVE GOT TO CHANGE AROUND HERE"

Jim Cornette comes down to the ring, he says you people are still some of the ugliest people he's ever seen in his life. I guess some idiots here still think the RnREX are still the best tag team of all time, but we're gonna spoil their homecoming. He introduces the New Midnight Express.

NWA World Tag Team Championships: The New Midnight Express (w/Jim Cornette) vs. The Rock n' Roll Express
I know this is a feud, but this hasn't been mentioned in like 4 weeks of TV, so it just seems thrown together. NME are still garbage, Poor JR he tries his best to hype this up, but all Lawler cares about is what panties Sable will be wearing tonight They work the old school tag style, which is a flop in 1998 cause no one here is over, Cornette tries to fight the ref, but when Tim White decides fuck it LETS GO! Jim runs away. Lots of stalling, and heel fuckery. NME win after Bob broke up an O'Connor Roll with a Bulldog.*

Backstage: Dox Hendrix interviews Luna and TAFKA Goldust, Luna says shes just here for one reason only and that's to rip all her clothing off her grotesque body and she will be stripped like a newborn baby.

Evening Gown Match: Luna (w/The Artest Formerly Known As Goldust) vs. Sable
Goes about 2 and a half minutes, and 2 of those was stalling or attempting to pull at one another's clothing. Mero comes out distracting Sable allowing Luna to pull Sable's top off and she wins. After the match; Sable hits Luna with the Sable Bomb. She takes off Luna's gown and chases her under the ring. Sable emerges with Luna's bra and panties. TAFKA Goldust goes under there and Luna comes out in his robe and they retreat.

1998 Sable's tits might be the GOAT!

Mr. McMahon, Patterson, and Brisco come down to the ring. Vince says something catastrophic is going to occur tonight, and that can mean anything. Anything CAN happen in the WWF. He says there's some sort of a conspiracy theory that he's here tonight to screw Steve Austin out of the WWF Championship tonight. He says the real reason he's here is that not that many years ago in Pinehurst, NC, his mother had the pleasure of giving birth to him. He's a native North Carolinian and it's kind of nice to be back home. As far as this conspiracy theory though, am I going to screw Stone Cold out of the WWF Title? He says the very thought that he would screw Steve Austin out of the WWF Title is beneath his dignity and will not dignify that with a response. He says he will not be held responsible or accept any responsibility tonight if Stone Cold screws Stone Cold.

The New Age Outlaws comes down to the ring, Dogg says it's a special night in the WWF so a personal friend of his and theirs has come out of retirement for one night to coach them to victory, and introduces DEAN SMITH! Billy Gunn then comes out with a blow-up doll in a UNC t-shirt.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages. D-Generation X proudly brings to you, it's WWF Tag Team Champions of the world. The Road Dogg Jesse James, The Bad Ass Billy Gunn, The New Age Outlaws."

WWF Tag Team Championships: The New Age Outlaws (w/Blow-Up Doll Dean Smith) vs. LOD 2000 (w/Sunny)
Standard, LOD/Outlaws match. LOD run through all their shit with the Outlaws bumping for all of it. Hawks fucks up some basic things through, which JR covers for. LOD go after Gunn's neck as the match just breaks down. They go for Doomsday, but Dogg chop blocks Animal's knee giving the Outlaws their first real offense of the match. Animal, shockingly sells the leg throught the heat. Hawk had a really shitty hot tag, the crowd seem super dead outside the typical LOD chants they Sunny gets them to do, but that goes about 4 seconds before they die again. The match breaks down, with Hawk hitting a German with a bridge, the ref counts the three.

After the match; The ring announcer announces that the Outlaws have retained. Replay shows Dogg's arms were down, but Hawk's right shoulder was up, but the ref was on the left side so he missed it. JR tries to clean it up by saying he only looked at Hawk's shoulders and missed Dogg's looooooooooooooooool. That means the ref is a fucking moron. Hawks then kill the ref with Doomsday cause he fucked up.

A stage is set up, as Tennessee Lee introduces Jeff Jarrett. Sawyer Brown play a song with Jeff Jarrett. It's not very good. They sing about not being first class, but not being white trash or some shit. BUT FUCK ALL THAT! Steve Blackman attacks Jeff when it's over, but Tennessee breaks the guitar over his head, Jeff then locks in the figure four until agents and refs break it up.

Undertaker/Kane video package.

Inferno Match: Kane (w/Paul Bearer) vs. The Undertaker
I'm not a fan of the inferno match, the concept is cool but it hinders the talent so much. Especially a Kane who is still in the early stages and doesn't bump much. The match is slow, lots of punches and tease spots. Paul does bring in a chair, and Kane whacks the shit out of him in the head, in a rare moment Taker didn't even put his hands up to protect it. I guess Taker is mad cause he doesn't do the rope-a-dope which worked for him at Mania. After maybe 8 or 9 minutes of stuff, Taker throws Kane over the top and past the flames which I guess decided not to raise at this moment. Taker is left alone in the ring, so Kane tries to leave.......BUT VADER RETURNS! AND HIS GOAT PUNCHES ARE BACK! He brawls with Kane back to ringside, where TAKE DOES THE NO HANDS PLANCHA OVER THE TOP TAKING OUT BOTH MEN! Paul hits Taker in the back with a chair, but he no-sells it and takes the chair away. He murders Kane with 2 chair shots to the head taking him out. Taker stalks Paul up the entrance way to where the concert was set up. Taker nails him with a drum, busting him open. Taker continues to give him that work before leaving and going back to Kane. He fights Kane back to ringside, and after a Big Boot, Kane falls back with his arm in the fire so Taker wins. So, Yeah.

Austin/Vince/Dude Love video package

WWF World Heavyweight Championship: Dude Love vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin
Dude attacks Austin once he comes down after the top rope taunt, Austin beats the shit out of him in the ring, out the ring, up the entrance way to where the concert was. Dude bumps his fucking ass off, which includes a hip toss off the stage onto fucking concrete.

Austin kicks him all the way back to ringside and back into the ring. Dude avoids an Austin charge and Austin gets his knees hung up on the ropes allowing Dude to take over. Dude does some things, before locking in a body scissors. Vince, Brisco, and Patterson come down to ringside. Patterson is holding a chair and sets it up for Vince to sit down in. Vince then sends them away. They brawl on the floor again, with Dude getting the better, Vince keeps getting in Austin's face when he's down. HOLY SHIT! DUDE HAS AUSTIN IN THE ABDOMINAL STRETCH AND VINCE SIGNALS THE TIMEKEEPER TO RING THE BELL BUT OUT OF FEAR HE REFUSES AND AUSTIN REVERSES IT! Back to the floor again, and Austin suplex's Dude's ankles into the steps. That gives Austin new life and beats the shit out of him around ringside. Back in, Dude sets up sweet chin music but Austin grabs the boot, he ducks the clothesline and the ref gets taken out. Dude then counters the Stunner and locks in the mandible claw, but Austin fights out but gets kicked in the dick. Dude applies the hold again, as Vince tries to wake up the ref. Austin backdrops Dude to the floor and Austin grabs the chair, but Vince fights him for it allowing Dude to get the chair he charges in on Austin, but Austin elbows the chair back into his face. Vince tries to help Dude up BUT AUSTIN SWINGS AND NAILS VINCE IN THE HEAD WITH A CHAIR! Austin brings Dude in and hits the Stunner. The ref is still down, so Austin counts to three himself and his music plays. AWESOME Brawl, clearly held back setting up the rematch. **3/4

After the Match; Austin celebrates, as Patterson and Brisco come out with EMT's. Brisco then forces Howard Finkle to say "Austin has been DQ'ed for hitting a referee, so Dude Love wins" Vince is then placed on a stretcher with a neck brace on to end the show.

 

[Deezy]

Sable Might've had GOAT tits. ..but she had no ass

 

[Crippler]

WWF Champion: Stone Cold Steve Austin
WWF Intercontinental Champion: The Rock
WWF Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws
WWF European Champion: Triple H
WWF Light Heavyweight Champion: TAKA Michinoku

WWF RAW is WAR
April 27th, 1998
Hampton, Virginia

Earlier Today; DX are outside the arena, Triple H says them embark on a mission, the enemy and they are near and will go down there. DOWN WHERE? DOWN THERE (Dick joke) He says we will blow them out of the water. This mission will start at the Scope with DUBYA SEE DUBYA wrasslin, and end when they arrive at Raw tonight. They get in the Jeep and drive off.

Ken Shamrock & Owen Hart vs. The Rock/Mark Henry (w/The Nation of Domination)
The bell rings, Owen and Ken talk about who should start. Owen panders to the crowd, as Rock says he wants Ken. So, Owen tags out. He and Ken high five................BUT OWEN KICKS HIM IN THE DICK! YES! Owen hits the spinning heel kick and grabs a chair. The rest of the Nation come in and put the boots to Ken. Owen then wraps the chair around Ken's ankle and PILEMANIZES HIM! Not once but twice. Owen locks in the Sharpshooter, as Blackman tries to make the save but he gets beaten down too. Faarooq runs out too, but still, the numbers are too much for him. Referees come down to finally make Owen let go BUT HE THEN BITES SHAMROCK'S EAR FUCK YES! Owen gets up with blood dripping from his mouth and he leaves with the Nation.

The Love Shack is set up on the stage, Dude Love and 2 hippy thots come out. Dude says by the end of the evening, the Dude could appreciate why all these people appreciate Stone Cold and understands why at one time, Steve Austin was his main man, bestest friend. Stone Cold is a tough cookie, the Dude would be lying if he said he wasn't hurting just a little bit. But the Dude took that tough cookie, chewed him up, and he spits him out. After the hanging and banging and the Dude put on the performance of a lifetime, the gas tank was on E, so when he took the ladies to the room. He looked into their eyes and had to break the bad news, the Dude just needs to be held. He says not only did he not get some but he has no gold as Austin took the easy way out, but his McMain man forced him back in. Then finally, when the chips were down, he resorted to a blatant cheap shot when he took out the head honcho. He says we have 3 choices, 1, find the ex-champion and have him face the dude for the title. 2, have a tournament or 3, Steve Austin should be fired and stripped of the belt and it should be handed on over to the Dude.

Earlier Today: DX are on the road, Hunter asks a crowd do they think Eric Bishoff sucks? YEAH! Does WCW Suck? Some get quite a couple yell, some woman then yells NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Hunter says WCW proudly starts the war and first the first shot. So, SUCK IT!

So we not gonna mention LEX leaving, Hogan joining, Nash/Hall? Results? Woman title thing?

DX are now with more fans, he asks this woman if WCW sucks she says yeah, and he asks who rules Wrestling she says DX.

Vince, Patterson, and Brisco arrive.

Terry Funk & 2 Cold Scorpio vs. The Headbangers
I think this is an unofficial Tag Team #1 Contenders match, cause JR and Cole keep talking about it. Super short, but a good time. Everyone basically stays in the ring and does double teams and counters. Terry Funk does a crazy Moonsault dive onto all of them. Everyone fights back into the ring, Ref Time White tries to break up Thrasher and Funk but they shove him so he calls for the bell. 2 Cold hits a moonsault and goes for a cover, but the match is over, this keeps going cause no one realizes the match is over

Earlier Today; Hunter makes jokes about WCW handing out free tickets, Pac says he just wants to say wats up to their boyz Hall and Nash. LET MY PEOPLE GO!

Vince McMahon comes down to the ring, he gets boooooo'ed out of the building before the fans chant for Austin. Vince says, tonight he comes before them with a heavy heart. Over the last 24 hours, he's had to make some very difficult decisions. But personally, he wants to clear up any speculation as to whom Stone Cold Steve Austin was attempting to strike with that metal chair. The more naive of them may assume it was Dude Love, but he knows Stone Cold was trying to take his head off. As a result of that brutal and blatant attack, he has sustained a mild concussion, experienced dizziness, and even nausea. None of them have in any way clouded his judgment tonight. Should he fire Stone Cold Steve Austin? Not yet. Firing him would be too good because he has other plans. Right here, in this very ring tonight Stone Cold will defend the WWF title against Goldust. He introduces the official who will be refereeing this match and brings out Gerald Brisco. He comes out to shake Vince's hand and Vince says if Austin lays a finger on him tonight, Austin's contract will be terminated and he will be stripped of the WWF Championship. He asks if he will be biased tonight, and Brisco says "YASSIR MR. MACMAHON" Vince asks should Goldust become WWF Champion, what kind of representative he would make, but says ANYONE would be better than the champion they have now.

Earlier Today; DX drive up to the building where WCW is but the gates is being closed. Hunter yells stuff, the Outlaws pound on the door. SHOOK?!?!?!

Tennessee Lee is in the ring and introduces J E DOUBLE F J A DOUBLE R E DOUBLE T! Ain't HE GREAT!

Jeff Jarrett (w/Tennessee Lee) vs. Bradshaw
About a minute, until "Club Kamazakie" attack Bradshaw for the DQ. At least during this Cole dubs Bradshaw's LARIAT! The Clothesline from Hell. They beat him down again, but TAKA makes the save. A, fourth one with a suit and mask on comes in to distract TAKA. They put the boots to TAKA, but bails once Bradshaw starts to get up.

Backstage: Kevin Kelly interviews an Irate Dude Love, he says this isn't the way this was supposed to work out. He wanted him to wear tie-dye, so he wore tie-dye. He wanted him to beat Austin, and he beat Austin. He shoves Kelly away and walks over to Vince backstage. He says not to screw him and says this is not what they talked about. Vince freaks out when he sees the camera picking this up so he yells at them to cut this and the mic off.

X-Pac, Chyna and Triple H of D-Generation X come down to the ring. Hunter does a Buffer impression, it's pretty terrible. The New Age Outlaws then come out on scooter bikes to mock the DOA DOA then come out with LOD 2000.

The New Age Outlaws (w/D-Generation X) vs. DOA (w/Chainz, Sunny & LOD 2000)
This goes about 3 minutes or so, Outlaws do what they do, bump around and make DOA stuff look decent. Gunn hits a piledriver, but for some reason gets distracted with DX having a group meeting, so that allows DOA to use twin magic. Gunn goes for a cocky pin, which allows him to be rolled up into a crucifix pin for the win.

WELCOME TO THE WARZONE!

The Undertaker vs. Barry Windham
Taker immediately hits the Chokeslam and then the Tombstone for the win. LOOOL Windham

Undertaker grabs a mic, he says Kane last night, you looked into the eyes of the dragon and got burned.He wanted a fight with his brother and last night wasn't the end. It was only the beginning. So what he wants him to come down to ringside and FINISH IT! Kane and Paul Bearer come out onto the stage, Paul screams that this has got to stop. This has all got to come to an end. UNDERTAKER! It wasn't supposed to be like this. It was all his idea. He was the one that was supposed to burn, but his Kane once again had to suffer the pain and agony of the inferno. That poor 3-year-old child laid up, you didn't see him, I did. He was there when they soaked him in saline and scraped those burns off his body. They have to have a truce. Last night, he tasted his own blood and saw Kane on fire again. Don't you understand "IT WAS HIS SON WHOSE HAND WAS ON FIRE"

JR says what we're hearing is Paul Bearer is KANE father, and Lawler cuts in saying that means PAUL BEARER HAD TO SLEEP WITH THE UNDERTAKERS' MOTHER!

Backstage: Kevin Kelly interviews Goldust, Goldust says he's not surprised by this match. And that he's a star already. He was born a #1 Contender. He will be a champion people would be proud of. He doesn't believe in foul language and he has an ivory snow mouth. After tonight, people will never forget the name of Goldust. Dude runs over and attacks him yelling "IT'S MY SHOT" Luna tries to defend him and people break it up. Earl and Brisco pull Dude Love off and away.

Triple H and Chyna storm down to the ring, Hunter says he should be on top of the world tonight as DX expands to take over. Nobody kills his buzz. Get it, DOA? He says they made him hot and someone has to get their ass kicked. He says he'll give anyone a shot at the European Title right now. 8-Ball or Skull, Chainz comes onto the stage, anybody in the back. Dan the Beast Severn runs down, as Jim Cornette tries to talk him out of it. He grabs him and slaps him, SO SEVERN HIP TOSSES HIM AND PUTS ON THE SUBMISSION! He chokes him in it too and referees run out to pull Cornette off. Hunter and Chyna just leave.

Backstage: Michael Cole interviews Stone Cold Steve Austin, Cole says it's been an eventful 24 hours for him. But, Austin cuts him off and says ever since he won the title it's been eventful. Vince McMahon has tried to do everything possible to get him to drop the belt to someone else, but it ain't gonna happen. You can have a special referee and timekeeper and a special jackass, but it doesn't matter to him. He'll defend the title every night of the week if he's got to. You ain't gonna screw him outta nothing because he'll beat their ass. If someone beats him, so be it, you ain't never ever gonna get rid of Steve Austin, and that's the bottom line.

More Val Venis shit, OVER IT!

Marc Mero comes down to the ring, He calls Sable out right now, and she comes down to the ring. He says she humiliated him last night, standing in the ring in nothing but her little bra and panties, and she should be ashamed. When he's not in her corner, she says she liked it, and says all the people liked it too. Sable says she's going to finally put him in his place and he starts laughing. He asks if she's gonna beat him up and she says she's gonna try. She says she wants away from him and time to stand up on her own. Mero asks if that's a challenge. She says she says DAMN RIGHT! Give her two weeks and she'll kick his ass on Raw.

Backstage: Vince and Brisco are talking, they mockingly talk about calling this right down the middle.

Vince sprints out to be the special guest timekeeper.

WWF World Heavyweight Championship: The Artist Formerly Known as Goldust (w/Luna) vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin [Special Referee: Gerald Brisco]
So, Goldust is still in Goldust attire and has gone back to his original music, but is still going by the TAFKA Goldust. Okay. Austin's pop again is ridiculous. 100% Angle fuckery, to the point where it's not even a real match. Brisco counts slow for Austin, but speed counts for Goldust. Same with corner 5 count, quick ones for Austin while Goldust gets like double that. Brisco also taunts and dares Austin to hit him, Brisco lets Goldust get away with a low blow too. They do a spot where both men get double KO'ed so Brisco does the standing 10 count, but Vince gets up and tells him to shake it off. He then restarts the count and counts slowly. Austin hits the Stunner, and Brisco counts SUPER slow and then fakes an eye injury. Dude Love runs out and attacks Austin. He throws Austin to the floor but when he comes charging in Austin backdrops him to the floor. They continue to fight...................BRISCO THEN TRIES TO POSITION AUSTIN INFRONT OF VINCE SO WHEN HE SWINGS THE TITLE AUSTIN DUCKS AND NAILS BRISCO WITH IT!

Austin's music hits and he celebrates, as Brisco is now busted open on the floor with Vince trying to help him up.