UWF 2013: Royal Rumble Trashtalking

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CaptainxBumout

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking



Derrick Bateman gets off the announce table and climbs ring apron. He looks very angry and is staring a hole through Antonio Cesaro.

Derrick Bateman
Hey Idiot! Don't ignore me you commie! You think all these people are competition? You know that Sinead O' Connor song "Nothing Compares 2 U?" That song was about me because nobody can compare to me. You think all these people keep writing me off because I’m new? Because I'm a rookie. Because I'm not that good. No quite the opposite. Everybody knows that I'm just too good for them. I'm gonna wait until you're all in the ring at once, go out under the ropes and lift up the entire ring and throw you all out!

I know you Antonio. You're just like every other person who has tried to invade this great country, a failure! Sure you've done a lot in your career here but none of that matters. This match isn't about how many championships you've won or how many dominant you've been in the ring. No only two things matter and one is luck. And I'm the luckiest bastard on the planet. When people don't think I can win, I prove them wrong. Nobody aside from my friends think I can win but I'll do it. And I'll do it in god damn style!


The crowd cheers for Derrick as Johnny Curtis and Maxine clap for him outside the ring.

The other thing you need is power and like I've said, I got that in strides! The Royal Rumble is national pastime. A classic event. I'll be damned if I let some commie like you, Barrett, Edge, Christian, any of you damn un-Americans win this match. Even if I have to eliminate myself, I'll do it for the good of this country! USA! USA! USA!

The crowd follows Bateman's lead and chants "USA!"

You here that boys? USA! And what exactly makes The United States of America so damn good? Men, manly men. And I don't see a manly man in this whole ring. Austin! (Points his finger at Aries) You always come out in your expensive suits and like to throw around how you're a former UWF Champion and say you're better than the entire NXT roster. You weren't looking so much better when you were laying flat on the mat at New Year's Revolution! Hold on, Johnny, Hey look up the closest hospital because somebody's heading to the burn unit! You're not a real man. You're almost as bad as Damien Sandow. Yeah I'm talking to you buddy! You're lucky we never got a chance to square off for those tag team titles before you lost them. Yes you lost them! You’re only as strong as your weakest link.

Johnny Curtis walks up next to Bateman and starts to speak.

Johnny Curtis
You know you should all really be paying attention to my man Derrick here. I mean none of you even look that impressive. I haven’t even heard of a lot of you. Derrick watches TV so he knows what’s going on but I’m busy making sure I look this damn good every time I step out here. It doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman, every time I shake my hips, the world takes notice. Now I may not be in the Royal Rumble match for some reason but you can be sure that whatever I’m doing that night will be the talk of the town.


Aside from me winning the rumble of course.

Yeah but I’ll definitely be on people’s minds after that night

But not as much as the 2013 Royal Rumble winner Derrick Bateman!

It’s not always about you Derrick.

You had your shot bro it’s my turn!

How’d you even get in the Royal Rumble over me? I’m the one who won our match last Tuesday.

Well I’m the one who will beat the NXT Champion Bully Ray this Tuesday.

Oh you mean like last time!

Maxine
Enough you two! No one‘s going to see either of you as a threat if you keep acting like children! And you‘re doing it in front of everyone!


The duo looks around to see everyone staring at them in silence, some chuckling to themselves.

Disregard all that.

Don’t tell me what to do!

Both Curtis and Bateman look angry at each other as Maxine has her face in her hand in shame.

curtisBateman.png


 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Throughout that entire ordeal, Christian has stepped forward with the microphone to his mouth. He once again looks quite unimpressed with the trio of Bateman, Curtis & Maxine.

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Christian: Bateman, did you not hear what I said? I told you to turn around and walk back up that ramp and to the back to Johnny and Maxine, not bring out Johnny and Maxine from the back! You've just proven to the world that you're an idiot, and this is the exact reason why I'm done wasting my breath on you.

Christian turns away from Bateman and co in disgust, choosing to move on immediately. His focus is on Antonio Cesaro.

Christian: Antonio, you're wrong, both with bringing European Class to Wrestlemania and you allegedly being superior to all of us. First of all, to make it to the main event of Wrestlemania you'll need to win the Royal Rumble, which you won't be doing. Why? Well this brings me to your lack of superiority. I'm sure you're far more superior to many of the other pretenders in this ring, but the same can't be said for me. See it's been just one week since we faced off one-on-one on Raw, and let's just say that night saw your undefeated streak end. That night was no fluke, Antonio, as much as you'd love to believe it was, but it was a sign of things to come. I've beaten you in the past, which contributed to the eventual downfall of The European Revolution, and now I've beaten you again but this time one-on-one. With that being said, what makes you think next Sunday night will be any different? You may be the United States Champion, but history tells its own story when The Swiss Sensation tangles with Captain Charisma. After all, Antonio, there is a saying for this very situation - history tends to repeat itself. That feeling of resentment you hold against me is going to continue for the foreseeable future, frankly for as long as I see fit. At the Royal Rumble, I'm going to prove that we Canadians are a far superior breed to the Swiss and to Europeans in general... and bring some Canadian class to Wrestlemania.

There is minimal reaction from the UWF Universe considering their dislike for both men. The mention of Canadian class prompts Christian to turn his attention to his former best friend, Edge.

Christian: If there's one thing you and I can agree on after all these years, it's that a Canadian WILL be winning the Royal Rumble in 2013. I know we've grown apart for some time and are no longer on terms of any kind, but I will say that the Edge I see in front of me is the Edge that I was hoping would re-emerge. You may not be able to recall the one time our paths crossed on Raw, but I'll jog your memory for you. Before you'd signed a Smackdown contract, you were backstage on Raw one night and were visiting some old friends. For whatever reason I'll never know and don't care to know, I was not one of them. You went on to question the undefeated streak I held at the time and basically shoved in my face that my career in comparison to yours... was a failure. That night I went on to extend my undefeated streak, going some way to proving you wrong, but when it came to becoming UWF Champion? Well, we all know what happened there. My point is, Adam, you pushed me that night. When your best friend since high school criticises everything you stand for and all you're attempting to become, it drives you to prove them wrong. Now don't get too ahead of yourself, I'm not in this position because of you, that night only played a minor part in earning myself one... more... World Championship match at The Great American Bash. Now you're going to play a different role, when I earn one... more... World Championship match at your expense after I toss you over the top rope! Don't worry, it's nothing personal.

Christian shoots a sly grin at Edge before turning away and allowing the threat to sink in. Christian paces around the ring a little before he now focuses on Damien Sandow.

Christian17.jpg


Christian: I think I speak for all my peeps when I say nobody asked for YOUR irrelevant opinion either. Nobody wants to hear the opinion of a man who claims to be elegant, intelligent, and wears a bathrobe to the ring. You can sugar coat that however you like, claiming it's a gown befitting of someone of your stature, but the fact is I've seen that exact robe before in Bed, Bath and Beyond. In all seriousness, Damien, you've had a successful career on Smackdown, which is something I can't deny as it's fairly obvious. But there's a catch to that statement - Smackdown's not Raw, and that's a bad thing. Ever since I ended the longest UWF Championship reign in history, handing victory to my former New World Order colleague, Cody Rhodes, Raw has solidified itself as the number one brand in this company. Not even an incompetent General Manager can prevent Raw from being dragged down to Smackdown's level, which is why your success on Friday nights accounts for nothing. It has come on a sub-par show with sub-par competition, yet it's all gotten to your head. You look ridiculous, you sound even worse, and it would be a low point in UWF's short history if a joke like you was to win the Royal Rumble. Unlike you, I've been robbed of the success I deserve, but that's going to change next Sunday night. I don't care if I enter the Rumble match first, I'll outlast and throw every single entrant over the top rope, and that includes you, Damien. You're welcome.

Sandow takes Christian's words with a grain of salt, but Christian is confident he understood them all. It's now four men down, two to go, as Christian decides its The Miz's turn.

Christian: I can't believe I'm about to stoop to your level, like it disgusts me to even consider doing this, but it's the only way you'll understand my thoughts as you've never been too bright. Miz... really? Really? I'm unoriginal? Miz if I'm unoriginal then you're a hypocrite. Your whole "I'm Awesome" shtick was barely original when you first brought the genius idea to the table, but now? Now it's just old, it's so 2010, and frankly you just don't get that. Nobody here thinks you're awesome, in fact you won't find one member of the UWF Universe who does think you're awesome. Calling yourself awesome is something an arrogant high school dropout would do, not a man in his early thirties looking to win one of the biggest matches in UWF history. The only reason you labelled me unoriginal was because you're like everybody else - you don't listen to what I have to say, but you know I'm right. I'm a man of my word, Miz, I don't lie or break promises. I have only five defeats to my name in my UWF career and they have all come from either being screwed by incompetent men in power, my mind being elsewhere and not focused on the match at hand, or my partner being incapable of holding up his end of the team. I'm a trailblazer, Miz, I always have been and will continue to be. I paved the way for aspiring kids like you to come through and seize the opportunity to make something of yourself, but instead you decide to waste a spot on the roster and become a comedian instead. You're a joke, Miz, and you won't be winning the Royal Rumble match over UWF's Captain. That's for sure.

Christian shakes his head, very happy that that's over with. It leaves him with one final person to address - Jeff Jarrett.

Christian: Speaking of unoriginal, that's you in a nutshell, Jeff. I mean come on, you're going to be the one millionth individual to state that I've hidden behind tag team partners my entire career? That's the thing with tag team wrestling, Jeff, you don't hide behind anybody. You work as a team, not as individuals, and if somebody isn’t holding up their end of the team then you're going to lose. If I didn't hold up my end of the team, I wouldn't be standing here boasting an extremely enviable NINE tag team championship reigns with THREE different men. Is that the sign of a man who hides? No, it's not, Jeff, because that's the sign of a man who knows what success tastes like. It's a taste that has eluded me in UWF thus far, but that's not by my own accord. I shouldn't be in the Royal Rumble match as I should already be known as the UWF Champion, that's a fact and nothing less. See Jeff, I've proven that I have what it takes to forge a successful singles career all by myself. I've dominated Raw from head to toe, and may I remind you of what I said to Damien earlier - that Raw is UWF's flagship show, all thanks to me. Jeff, you're not the only one who has dismissed my chances, and that's fine as I've become accustomed to hearing it, but at the Royal Rumble it all ends. After I throw you over the top rope, I want you to watch from the back as I SINGLE HANDEDLY win the 2013 Royal Rumble and book myself one... more... World Championship match. I will main event Wrestlemania, I will become UWF Champion, and I'll make sure I find you and hold the title right in front of your face!

As Christian's arm falls to his side whilst glaring at Jarrett, it becomes evident that he has finally stopped speaking. It's time for somebody else to step forward and say their piece.

 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Damien Sandow:

This is precisely the issue we have with today's society, for when someone of a higher intellect speaks like myself or even Mr. Cesaro here…

*Sandow raises his hand up as if showing an actual level*

SD_694_Photo_038.jpg


Those beneath said intellect simply do not comprehend anything stated even if it is for their own betterment. Miz you said you didn't understand what I said, yet you made the excuse that you were simply not paying attention. When in reality it is simply because your feeble mind is of the same level of those in the audience here today, so when someone’s vernacular is higher than your own, which is not a great feat, you simply scramble to find an excuse to not reveal your lack of intelligence. It's quite desponding knowing someone of your stature and intelligence believes himself to be awe-inspiring in any way, for it shows just how low the intellect of the average human being has fallen. You are nothing more than a hot headed egotist, whose mediocre rise has clouded his mind to think he is actually relevant. You actually have a lot in common with this other ignoramus.

*Sandow motions towards Jarrett*

For however small his accomplishment is he believes it to be of the same level of actual accomplishments like my own, I lead my team over your own Mr. Jarrett, which should of opened your eyes to reveal your proper place and yet it seems that lesson did not stick in your mind which points towards my having to impart yet another lesson towards you. Perhaps you should pay more attention so that you may not live your life with disappointment anymore, see for someone of your level you aren’t have bad and you can live a proper career at that lower stage. And these people will think nothing less of you, mainly because even their simple minds have no room to think about Jeff Jarrett.

*The crowd boos as Sandow turns, getting a smirk on his face as he extends his hand out to Antonio*

Mr. Cesaro, a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I have the outmost respect for a man who indulges in learning multiple languages, especially when these simpletons barely have a grasp on the English language. Thank you for noticing I speak proper Queen’s English while these people simply…make noises come out of their mouths and call it speech. And in said common respect I take no offense to your desire to win this bout, just as I expect a competitor of your stature not to take personally when I take that goal for my own. Mindless squabble is for simpletons, we are competitors searching a common goal, and I’m sure holding that United States championship onwards will be a great consolation prize to my shining victory.

*Sandow turns his head and the smile fades off slowly*

And then there’s you two imbeciles, allow me to enlighten you as I never lost that championship. I am in currently in the process of regaining it, and as far as not facing you two, it is simply because you two have never and will never deserve to be mentioned in the same breath as Mr. Bryan or myself. You two are nothing more than two men with the collective mind of an elementary school child. The thought of either of you main eventing a weekly show is despondent enough, let alone the appalling notion that Bateman would somehow emerge victorious and drag down the name of Wrestlemania by main eventing it. You two are not of my concern, because simply, Derrick is just another number one that I’ll probably be lucky enough to avoid having to soil my extremities of once I earn the number 30 entrance.

*Sandow looks towards Christian, adjusting his robe*

This leaves only Christian, the human representation of disappointment at its finest. For a man so arrogant about his so called accomplishments, it seems your only triumph is when you’re standing in the background of someone else’s glory. Whether it be a Rated R Miscreant in current company, or the crazed man who currently holds the title of your brand. You bragged about someone else gaining a championship? Honestly is this how delusional society is or are you just a “special†case? See Christian this is not a matter of what show is greater for that is completely irrelevant. Only an ignorant fool would put such effort towards what different colored serial is better than the other, which is precisely why I see that matters to you and to the audience. For this is not a matter of Smackdown besting Raw or NXT, this is a matter of Damien Sandow besting each and every one of you. And that is a lesson I shall be imparting upon you and the rest of the cohorts in this bout, it shall be my grandest lesson until Wrestlemania, where the rest of the world will be enlightened by my message.
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Jarrett smiles and finally has to interrupt.

JeffJarrett.jpg


Jeff Jarrett: Wow, I really hate to interrupt this sad excuse for a pissin’ contest, but…nah I don’t.

He continues to grin as he turns to Cesaro.

Jeff Jarrett: Tony. How in the world can you compare Swisserland to Tennessee? Come on! When the Texans were fightin’ fer there independence, the Tennesseans owned up to their nickname and VOLUNTEERED for war! World War 2 breaks out and you’re all like, “Hey, I got the snacks! Let’s just have a talk!†I mean, really. It’s like never playin’ the game because you’re too busy refin’! Don’t pull that NEUTRAL bullshit on me. If ya don’t wanna fight, just say yer yella and get it over with! That’s why, if ya ask me, I’d take a Redneck over some metrosexual, European fencesetter anyday. Especially one that thinks that HE made any title prestigious. How long did YOU have the European title? I had it almost six months and beat some of the biggest names in the WWE AND the UWF. You wanna think yourself superior? How about you put that title up against a REAL AMERICAN like ole Double J, cause I’ll teach you that under AMERICAN in the dictionary, it says simply ASS KICKER!

The crowd erupts as Jarrett waits out the positive response from the crowd. Suddenly, Jarrett turns to Derrick Bateman who is still on the apron.

Jeff Jarrett: And, you two need to shut the hell up. I unfortunately have to agree with Christian here. You’re not proving any points tonight. In fact, you’re helping prove the coward’s point, instead. How about tweedledee and tweedledum follow Alice there back to Wonderland and let the adults finish their conversation? As much as I appreciate the chants and flag waving, it doesn’t help when it comes from a couple of idiots ruining the curve for all of us! I mean, you’re right. You’re only gonna find real men in America. And, some day, you two will make fine uns. But, for now, how about listening to your den mother and scram!

Jarrett turns his back on the younger superstars turning his attention to Christian.

Rumble1.jpg


Jeff Jarrett: Ok, fair enough. I took the cheap shot. But, seriously, it just seems you play the part of the 'bridesmaid never the bride' all too easy. And, besides that, from the beginning you have been nothing but mouth and flash. Incessantly whining about not getting yet ANOTHER title shot. Do you hear me complaining about not getting another shot at Edge? Nah. Cause I've already moved on. And, Ole Double J has decided that instead of cryin' like a little girl...AKA...Christian. I figured I'd man up and just kick a few asses come Rumble. I mean, I ain't here ta lose, that's fer sure! I'm here to win. And, unlike yourself, I've had the taste of victory and gold since I've shown up here and I'll have it again. (Glances and grins at EDGE.) But, if there's one thing I'll dedicate myself to it's keeping sorry asses like yourself, Edge, Sandow...HELL...every damn one of yuns...OUT of the ring and out of the Rumble! But feel free to keep spoutin' that mantra of yours. Won't make a bit a difference!

Jarrett takes a walk around the ring as the crowd begins to get restless. Suddenly, Jarrett turns and grins at Sandow.

Jeff Jarrett: NO! Damien, it's not that we don't understand the crap you spew. It's that no body gives a shit. You're not worth my time to try and discect whatever it is you're trying to get across. If you're so much damned smarter than anybody else, why are you the only one of YES without either a title or a golden ticket? (Puts his finger up) Ah...Ah...before you go off on how you're gonna win the Rumble to accomplish that, let me assure you that, if I have to eliminate myself, I'm gonna dedicate myself to personally dispensing with your prissy little ass! Wrap you head around that fact, Sandy! You wanna call what I've done in wrestling not on the level of your accomplishments? What the HELL? Seventy championships verses your...wait...you haven't even won seven yet? Have ya? I'm sorry but your opinion is invalidated, Slapnuts!

Jarrett stops and looks at the camera.

Jeff Jarrett: Ya know. It all comes down to experience and stamina in a match like this and with a KING OF THE MOUNTAIN winner and legend in this business, I gotta say that yours truly is THE CHOSEN ONE.

Jeff-Jarrett-tna-superstar-11.jpg


Jeff drops the microphone and lays out one of his patented struts right in the middle of the ring; smiling all the way.​
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

[video=youtube;GvMcfb57MjA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvMcfb57MjA[/video]

"Coma White" by Marilyn Manson begins to play as the fans in attendance erupt into boos and everyone's attention is directed to the stage. "Smackdown's Forgotten Signee" himself soon makes his presence known as he walks through the curtain, a cold indifference to everyone and everything around him in his facial expression as he stops at the top of the stage, raising the microphone in his possession to his mouth as his music fades out to silence.

EddieGuerrero1_display_image.jpg


Remember me?

This causes the crowd to boo Eddie more intensely, something that causes him to lower his microphone and look around at them for a moment before raising his microphone again.

On the fourth day of the eleventh month of the two-thousand and twelfth year, it happened, the Ultimate Wrestling Federation secured the most dangerous free agent on the circuit when they signed Eddie Guerrero to a talent contract. It was a day that was to live in infamy, it was a day I cherished close to my heart and in my mind, I took a trip backward in time in that moment to the days of my youth, the days I discovered not only that I wanted to wrestle, but that I was meant to. Signing with the Ultimate Wrestling Federation was such an invigorating choice and life decision that it was like my career was starting all over again in some ways, this was a place that I could enter into and do what I love for the people I love, and no one would hold any of my past mistakes against me because here, those mistakes are memories that are dead and gone.

But quickly I realized that things weren't as sunny as they seemed, ese', I saw the writing on the wall when day after day, week after week, and even month after month, there was nothing here for me to do. It all started when Desmond Wolfe revealed my placement on Smackdown before the world was supposed to know it, effectively ruining the surprise, murdering my momentum, and rendering all the hype behind who Friday nights were gaining in place of the loss of their precious, "Animal", a complete waste of time and energy. But then there was an unexpected shift in power. Survivor Series was in a state of limbo and no one knew when it was going to go live on pay-per-view; several of the biggest matches had not been mapped out by any of the talent, the agents, the trainers, no one. Smackdown had dropped the ball and it looked as though the entire federation was going to suffer for it, until the man in charge of bringing you Raw every week and the men in charge of bringing you NXT every week stepped up to the plate and shoulder something they weren't responsible for and weren't expected to shoulder. They put all of the matches together and gave you what you paid for, Survivor Series.

Well, Desmond Wolfe didn't like that very much. He called it a car crash and horrible booking, instead of being grateful that someone else picked up the flack, he acted out like he always did when he did things like make sure Stone Cold Steve Austin looked like a jobber the week he appeared on his show and issue challenges to D'Angelo Dinero for a wrestling match, because it was the match everyone wanted to see, in his mind. Unable to act like an adult, he took his ball and went home, leaving Smackdown hanging once again, triggering deja vu to occur when the man behind Raw became the man behind Smackdown. And this is where what sounds like a directionless, rambling, nonsensical train of thought drives home its point. When the person in power changed on Smackdown, I thought that things were going to change for me, judging by how Survivor Series went down I had no reason not to think that. But once again the writing was soon on the wall and my smile was ripped from my face and replaced with an all too familiar frown of bitterness, as though I'm some sort of living, breathing Latin Potato Head.

Even though he was the one that signed me to my contract two months ago and signed off on the trade that sent me to Smackdown and Batista to Raw and justified the switch by saying he wanted to light a fire under me, HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ME. Because I'm not someone that's had months of months of storyline establishment like a Dean Ambrose or a John Cena or a faction like Y.E.S. that this entire show has revolved around since its inception, I'm just not worth investing the time or effort into. The fire was lit when I told you it was weeks ago, holmes, you just haven't put anything over the fire for me to cook! By the way, how'd that trade work out for you in the long run? Batista left the company and now you've got Shelton Benjamin and an actress pretending to be his mother! Good luck with that comedy act, vato, it's only a matter of time before he usurps Cody Rhodes as UWF Champion and becomes the longest reigning titleholder!

There have been three people put before me in the past two months; Rob Van Dam, Edge, and Jeff Jarrett, but my match with Rob Van Dam was on a lackadaisically thrown together results show put together by the previous powers that be, so in terms of true matches I've only had two. When I faced Edge, I beat Edge. Yes, the legendary Adam Copeland himself. The man that was the heart and soul of UCW Smackdown during his title reign, the man that came this close to being UWF Champion time and time again, I beat THAT man, and what did I get for it? A non-title match against Jeff Jarrett. But what did Edge get? A European Championship title shot at New Year's Revolution. He was rewarded for me kicking his ass! Why? Because he's one of those pendejos that's been here since day one and has all this character development and I'm just getting my feet wet!

When I saw this business venture as my career restarting, I didn't want it to be, nor did I have any reason to suspect it would be, happening in this fashion. I don't want my mistakes held against me, but my accolades and accomplishments? Those things should carry over! And I know what you're thinking, "Here's Eddie pissing and moaning again because he's not getting his way", and you're absolutely right, I am complaining because the way I've been treated in the past and continue to be treated is unacceptable and unfair! But what am I so worked up about, right? I've got two matches on Smackdown this week, I've been booked for promo time, and I've been given a spot in the Royal Rumble. I should be thankful to Triple H, right? NO!

I walked into Triple H's office last week and I asked him if I had any plans for me moving forward, and he told me that he didn't and that if I asked to be released from my contract, he would understand and would gladly let me go. So not only did I just validate my suspicions and confirm that none of these accusations are rooted in paranoia, I also proved why I shouldn't be thankful for any of this! He didn't book me in a match against Jeff Hardy to test my abilities, he didn't book me in an over-the-top battle royal for the number thirty spot because he wanted to see me secure a better chance at victory, and he certainly didn't put me in this Rumble match to do me any favors. He did all of it because he's sick of hearing me belittle him and his product for underutilizing me and mistreating me and wants me off of his show.

Now I understand why Stone Cold wanted to retire, because for some reason guys like me and him and Sting and Kane, we aren't welcome on his shows. We can trash talk until we lose our voices, we can wrestle until we're injured and keep wrestling, we can win every title in this place and we'll still be resented because we just don't have the consistency of a Christian or the creativity of a Damien Sandow. Well that just isn't going to be the norm around here anymore, holmes.

You see, Triple H said one thing that I actually agree with. He said it's time for me to put up or shut up, and he's right, but if any of you think it's going to be the latter you are sadly, sadly, sadly mistaken, vato! That glass ceiling I talked about? I'm going to shatter it into twenty-nine pieces, each one of them having a name and a face and a placement for me to lacerate. And when I do lacerate you, when I do get what I deserve and each and every one of you have fallen to the outside floor, there won't be enough kind words in the English or any other language that anyone can string together to console your depression. Out of all the possible match-ups contained within this entire roster, there isn't a victorious outcome that can alleviate the pain you're going to feel from this loss.

And when I come in swinging, whether it's at number one or number thirty, and you sweat and cry and BLEED, THERE AREN'T ENOUGH DOCTORS AND PARAMEDICS ON STAFF TO PUT YOU BACK TOGETHER! The question to ask yourselves in the following days isn't how you're going to eliminate Rhino or Derrick Bateman or anyone else, all twenty-nine of you need to ask yourselves how you're going to eliminate ME. This industry killed me once, and I...came...back, ese'! How can you win a Rumble match against someone stronger than death? Sure you've had more time to talk amongst yourselves and maybe this will be all I get to say before this contest occurs, but that doesn't budge my confidence even slightly, holmes. So I've got a question for you, UWF, can you feel the heat?


Eddie lowers his microphone as he looks down the ramp to the ring, waiting to see who will reply.
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Curt Hawkins
And that's it! I've had enough. This is getting tiring, this is getting boring. You all claim that you're going to win this when all of you have gotten your chance. I haven't and its time for change!

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Curt unbuttons his jacket to show his "Change" shirt underneath it. Reks points at the shirt.

Curt Hawkins
That's what this is all about, change, my friends, change! Change to the main event scene around here. Change from the normal faces always being on the cover of everything. Well guess what pals, you all had your chance, now back of the line because its time for the young, hungry superstars to take their place at the helm of this company. I'm tired of seeing the same title holders, and the same title contenders. When is it going to be my turn? Well, I'll tell you. Now is my turn. I'm not waiting for it anymore, I'm taking it!

Curt Hawkins looks towards Reks and the two of them start to head down towards the ring, talking on the way down.

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Curt Hawkins
Its like the Royal Rumble match is the time where everyone in the back grows a pair and decides that they actually have a chance at winning something big. See, I'm not like that. I've known I could win the big one, I've just been waiting for it to get to me. Unlike all of you out here who have been given that big break, and weather you failed, or you passed, I've never had my big break. My one shot, my chance. Well my friends, this is it. Right here, right now. One match, 29 other men, this is as big as it gets and I will be damned if I let this one pass right by me. Long enough have I been patient waiting for my chance at the big one. This is my payoff for all the matches I've had to do here. All the times I've been treated like a jobber. This time I'm going from zero to hero. From the bottom to the top. It's possible, it's happened before, and all of you better get ready for it to happen again.

Curt reaches the ring, and climbs up on the top rope. He sits down on the corner turnbuckle and once again shows his shirt.

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Curt Hawkins
Soak it in. Take it all in because this is all that it's about. This isn't about Austin Aries getting another main event. This isn't about Christian STILL trying to prove that he belongs and that he isn't just a shadow of Edge. The difference between us is that I broke out from Edges shadow, while you will always be there. You say I've never been anybody, and I never will. Lets look at the tale of the tape between the two of us, buddy, I'm 25 years old. You're 39 years old. It took you until you were almost 40 years old just to barely, BARELY be seen as his own man, and someone who could wet his toes in Main event waters. What took you so long, huh, Christian? Was it that YOU knew it yourself that you would never be anything more then the Marty Jannety to Edge? That the most you'd ever be was one half of a tag team? Now don't get me wrong, I'm no stranger to tag teams, but in every team I've ever been in, I have been the break out star, I have been the Shawn Michaels, if you will. You're crowning moments came as a tag team champion. Does anyone even remember you're world title reigns outside of this company? You know, those ones that only lasted a couple of weeks. You talk about yourself like you're a living legend with in all actuality Christian, you're nothing more then a washed up never was. Sure, I talk a big game, but I'm on on the tail end of my career. I should be the one in Main Event matches. When my music hits, and I come down to the ring, the fans know that that is their best match for the night. Nothing is going to beat that match. I want to be the type of guy that when I don't main event, the people in the crowd and at home go, "Hm, somethings wrong if this guy is main eventing." Yeah, that's me Christian. You can say that you don't know who I am, and that you never hear anyone talking about me. Hell, take all credit away from my hardcore championship reign because when it comes down to it, after this Rumble match, not only you will know my name, but everyone else will, and EVERYONE will be talking about me. That's a promise.

Curt moves is attention from Christian to someone who he has not yet addressed, Damien Sandow.

Curt Hawkins
Damien Sandow. You too are a new face to me, and I'm glad you could join the party my friend. But I've got to be completely honest with you here, you sir, are the text book definition of a Buzz Kill. You see we're all out here having ourselves a good time, fighting on who's going to win the Rumble and then...we hear that GOD AWFUL song that you chose to be your entrance theme and I kid you not, I saw 10,000 heads drop at once and go to sleep. I couldn't find a more boring man if I tried. Sure, you speak in a lot of big, fancy words but no one cares. No one cares what you want to say. "I Shall be the Worlds Heavyweight Champion. I shall win the Royal Rumble on the 20th day, of the 1st Month of 2013 hibjajba abacazam." Let me tell you something. You're nothing more then a cheap Hunter Hearst Helmsley but with darker hair. I thought you were NEVER going to finish. Just when it seemed you were done you decided to raise that microphone again and bore us all the death. We didn't ask you for an essay, buddy. Actually, we didn't ask for you at all. Look around here, we already got enough boring pricks around here. We got Austin Aries, Antonio Cesaro, the Miz, Edge, Christian, Wade Barrett. God, so many terrible people in one place. And what exactly are you doing that warrants us to say "Thank You."? I'm welcome for what? I didn't say thank you. The only time I even thought about saying thank you is when you decided to finally shut up. Do use all a big favor, if you really want to help, do us all one big favor and would you please shut the hell up!

The fans pop for the usage of a famous Chris Jericho line spoken by the party starter, Curt turns away from Sandow to face Edge.

Curt Hawkins
Edge...man, look at you. I used to look up to you. I used to sit in your corner, and help you win matches. But look at you now. You are nothing more then a bitter, aging man that can't accept the fact that his glory days have come and gone. I will hand it to you though, you have had a pretty amazing career but I'm about to have one better then you. See, I learned everything I needed to, and now I'm going to use all of your own teachings against you. This is going to be a classic case of the student out doing the teacher. The last time you saw me, I was young, and I was just starting to get a feel for this business. Well, it's been a long time since then. I've only gotten stronger, better, and wiser, and I don't think you know what's coming your way at the Royal Rumble. I'm going to embarrass you when I flip you over the top rope. I'm going to enjoy getting my payback for all the many times you made me fight your battles for you. For all the times I put my neck on the line just to help you win a match, or keep one of your precious championships. Well the time for learning is over, and now it's time for fighting. It's time for the test, Edge, and like it or not I'm going to Ace this thing and send you back home packing to whatever rock you climbed out of.

The confrontation between Edge and Hawkins left the crowd excited as Curt moves to another man in the ring, Antonio Cesaro.

Curt Hawkins
My God, do I still have to deal with you? I'm going to be honest right now, you are my least favorite man in this match, and in the entire UWF. Everything you say just makes me want to get a baseball bat and swing it at that bald dome of yours like I'm Babe Ruth. Everything that comes out of that nasty European mouth of yours is the same thing over and over again. You bag on the US, you claim how disciplined and Superior you are, you say that you're OUR United States Champion. Well, yeah. Whatever. The only reason you're OUR United States Champion buddy is because our match on Raw is non title, and I've never had a shot at that belt. But, but, you know what? Thats' fine. Mmhm. Perfectly fine. Because I don't need your sloppy seconds. I'm going to do something you've failed to do, and something you'll never do and that is became YOUR World Champion! Kinda has a nice ring to it, don't it? Just flows right off the tongue. UWF Champion Curt Hawkins. I like it. Almost as much as I'll like kicking your ass on Raw, and eliminating you from the Rumble.

Curt gets into Cesaro's face and both say nothing. After a couple of seconds Hawkins backs up to turn and face Jeff Jarrett.

Curt Hawkins
Well if it isn't old Jeff Jarrett. Double J. Wow, I gotta be straight with you man...I didn't even know you could still walk, much less wrestle. But good for you, good for you. Use that walker to get down the ramp. Actually, make sure your hearing aid is turned on right now because I got something important to say. Jeff Jarrett, you we're a nobody, and you're always going to be a nobody. You're barely an afterthought. The fact that you're in this Rumble Match is just...sad. Sad that people like you that have had all the chances, and all the time in the world to do something great and make history...still fail. People like you hogging up the young mans spot light just so you can say, "Hey, look at me! I still matter!" Well guess what pal, you don't. You don't matter. You never have, and you never will. It's a little to late for you to be doing this, and come the 20th when you step into this Rumble, this fight, this brawl, you'll see that it's a young man's game now, and you're just a little too old to be Partying for the Party Starter.

Curt looks dead serious into the face of Jarrett. Curt slowly shakes his head and walks away from him. He looks down at the mat for a few seconds before addressing his Final superstar, the Miz.

Curt Hawkins
Better than me, huh? Better than me, is that what you said? Well that's fine by me, you can think that all you want in that delusional mind of yours because it really makes no difference to me. Miz, you wanna say that you've been over looked, and under estimated, I don't think thats the truth. I don't think that's the truth because you've had your chance, and what did you do with it? It was one of the biggest flops in wrestling. I know this thought is kicking around in the back of your head, and I know it hurts you to say this but Miz, you will never be anything more then a glorified Mid Carder. Someone who never should have made it but somehow did it, and it turned out being one of the most embarrassing things in wrestling. You can gel your hair, spike it up all nice, wear a fancy suit and think you're hot shit but you are is a sad mid carder trying to be a main eventer. If it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, then it must be a duck. Wear that main eventer mask all you want because at the Royal Rumble I'm going to rip it off and expose you for who you really are. A failed reality star trying to be a wrestler who can't even make it on the C show. Come talk to me when you can make it in the big leagues on the A show. You're a high school actor trying to perform on Broadway and the reviews are about to come in and they don't look good Miz. No, they don't look good.

Curt steps into the middle of the ring and looks around from superstar to superstar, checking his competition.

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Curt Hawkins
I don't care who you are, where you come from, what you've done. I'm a shark in a sea of fish and it's just not funny anymore. I'm heads above the competition, and I'm going to make that clear. Laugh at me now, think I'm a joke now. Underestimate me now! Because on the 20th of January the Party's over. The time for laughing will be gone. Because nothings funny about UWF Royal Rumble winner Curt Hawkins. That's just a sign of whats to come. An inside look into 2013, the year of change...the year of Curt Hawkins!

Hawkins extends his arms to his sides and closes his eyes, seeing the future that he has painted in his head.
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Jarrett leans on the ropes and glares at Hawkins.

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Jeff Jarrett: Curt, You want change? Make your own. That’s the only way you’re going to get that far that fast, son. Nobody is gonna give it to ya. Nobody is gonna give ya a leg up in this business. As another big mouth used to say, you want some, come get some. No offense, kid, but you’ve got a ways to go before you ascend to the greatness of half of these seasoned competitors. Can you do it? Sure. Everyone has a chance in the Rumble. Will you? Doubtful, but, if you do, it will be because you dropped the party and got serious!

He starts to walk off, but decides instead to look back at Curt.

Jeff Jarrett: Ya know, kid, you ain’t the first greenhorn to pull the old joke on me. Yeah, I’m up in years. I’ve seen a lot. Mostly championships. Did I mention I’ve had seventy of them? Well, I have. I’ve fought in every type of match. Hell, I’ve won every type of match. But the Royal Rumble is one I never got. You say that we’ve all had our chance. Well, this is my first chance at the Royal Rumble; my first shot at Wrestlemania. And I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let someone as green as you pass me up. I respect what you’ve done, but this is gonna take more than a catchy, artsy T-shirt!

The crowd gives him a slight pop as he moves on.

Jeff Jarrett: Eddie! Mi Amigo! Been a while. I know we had a match on Smackdown recently, but we’ve seriously missed a lot of time. After the Rumble we oughta get together and catch up. Now, I know we’re not buddy buddy. But we were on the same show and same page sinking in the same boat….and still are, aren’t we Eddie? I mean, If I hadn’t took the title when I did, Hell, I may never gotten another chance. They just don’t know what to do with us, do they, my friend. Well, I know you deserve more and all, but I’m not givin’ ya a pass at the Rumble and I don’t expect you to give me a pass either. It’s about givin’ our best and throwin’ it all on the line for that once in a life time shot. Right? I mean, guys like us, Eddie, we don’t know if we’ll get another chance, do we? The management is already passing us up for fresh faces; even when we beat the hell outta them. The two of us and, soon, guys like Edge and Christian will have to give twice as much to get noticed half as often.

Jarrett smiles and Eddie nods in agreement.

Jeff Jarrett: But that doesn’t stop us, does it, Eddie? We just keep on givin’ cause this is what we do! This is what we are! This ring is an extension of what it means to be Eddie Guerrero and Jeff Jarrett. Am I right?

Jeff turns and steps up suddenly to the Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Micheals.

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Jeff Jarrett: Well, Shawn, am I? I mean, you’ve seen first had what management can do to make or break a wrestler! You’ve been used as a tool of the machine more than once only to be passed up by one of these upstarts. Vince just rolls you out when he needs to build some new guy or push some angle or boost ratings. Guys like us are just actors in a sad play that is in its third and final act. And we don’t know if this Rumble will be our last. We don’t know if that one injury that will break us is waiting in that ring.

Jarrett suddenly turns to Edge.

Jeff Jarrett: Right, Edge? No, we know this, but it doesn’t stop us. It doesn’t even slow us as we race to the ring; as we jump in a brawl of bodies all bent on destroying us to make them the next big thing. (Looks at the Miz) Trying to make themselves look awesome (gives Sandow an angry look) or more intelligent (shoots Aries a grin) or relevant. But what they don’t realize is that we’re far from done. That we’re never gonna give up. We’re never gonna go away. That we have to do what we do, because what happens in that ring is our past, present and future all wrapped up in one marvelous night of givin’ everything we are to not only try and grab the brass ring one more time, but give the fans a night they will remember for EVER. No, that’s what we do and we’ll do it till we die. The Rumble will be no different. That you can count on!
 
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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: NXT Championship - Bully Ray [c] vs. CM Punk

CM Punk is scratching his head

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CM Punk: Hmmm apparently you have been hit in the head one two many times with a steal chair because what you hold is exactly why I am out here. I'm not here for some big payday. Are kidding me with that talk. Do I look like Dwyane, do I look like Hulk Hogan. No I don't and it's because I am not a sorry excuse like both of them are. I have never cared about being paid the big boy dollars. I was never in this business for that aspect as I have always been about being the best in the world and I am exactly just that. I could have stayed with Ring of Honor back in the day, hell I can go back there right now and take a major pay cut and I wouldn't give two cents about it because that's not why I am here. I am here to compete to be the very best in any company and any show I am put on and I am going to keep doing that until I no longer can compete in this ring or until someone else comes along and proves to me that I cannot and they have surpassed me. WrestleMania is a culmination of showcasing why I am the best in the world and I am going to do so as the NXT World Champion, but let me be honest with you Bully Ray, that's not happening for a very long time. Whether I'm on NXT, Raw, or Smackdown, CM Punk is here to stay and I am going to go through the UWF roster faster than you can take a shower. And speaking of needing big paydays, you might be needing one soon because I can smell you from across the ring.

The crowd laughs while Bully Ray doesn't see any humor in CM Punk making fun of him

CM Punk: I can throw out a few jokes from time to time, but I'm not out here to play games. Every time I come out to this ring I am out to speak the truth about whatever it is I have to say. I did that with your old pal, Rhino and I shut him up. I didn't just get by him. Maybe if you actually paid attention and observed your opponents you would know that. I was put through a table, slammed through steel steps. Hell it felt like a hardcore match out there which was in Rhino's advantage, but yet he still couldn't get the job done as I single-handedly beat him and used his own finishing move to decimate him. I didn't use a low blow to get the job done like you did to beat The Miz. So my question for you is what makes you think you have any shot against me in twelve days, huh? I'll answer that one for you, you don't. I am on a streak right now that now one who comes before me will break. You can give the me old, I'm the NXT World Champion story and that's the reason you'll beat me. Or you can give me the crappy excuse that your this big so called tough guy because your bigger than I am, but yet that still will not be enough to keep me down. I'll admit it, you're a bigger guy than I am, but I have put down much bigger guys than you at ease. You are no different than the rest of them. You're a joke compared to those others who came before you. I am a much different guy compared to when we had our battles before and yeah you put me through a table. Wow what a shocker that you had to go to the EXTREME to keep me down. Is that all you ECW losers know how to wreslte. I mean seriously it's a complete and utter joke and it makes you look like a bitch rather than a man.

CM Punk lowers his microphone as Bully Ray steps closer to Punk as the two lock in eye to eye with Bully Ray starring down at Punk as the height difference is shown

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CM Punk: Ohhh you're giving me that evil stare look that you do every time you send someone through a table. That doesn't frighten me, B-Ray. You don't frighten me, your little ECW boys do not frighten me, nothing frightens CM Punk. And speaking of which about ECW since you mentioned it when you were speaking. Yes, yes I was in ECW with Vince McMahon and yes I was the poster of that brand years ago when Vince first noticed me in WWE. But once again had you been paying attention to when Rhino and myself had our little feud, I settled those talks. It was a joke working for that show. What kind of showcase was I presenting to the world, that I could win a match via a hardcore style match or an extreme rules match. I wasn't showcasing my talents as a wrestler, I was showcasing them as a hardcore bully and that's not why I am in this business. I am in this business to be a wrestler and during that time I wasn't able to showcase those talents being on that brand so luckily they eventually moved me. So since that move from ECW to present time right here in NXT, I have been able to showcase my talents as the best damn wrestler that this business has ever seen and it's because I back up every single damn thing I say I am going to do!

More cheers are heard for CM Punk after that statement is made by him

CM Punk: You keep forgetting who I am, Ray. I am the man that in twelve days is going to take that NXT World Title off of your shoulders. I have been involved in the World Title picture for the last five years from any company I have been with you. I know what it's like to be in big match situations. Hell I was the first ever Undisputed Champion in this company. While you were probably playing the UWF Video Game making your own character and boosting your ratings to become the champion and yet still failing because I was the guy you were trying to beat in it. What has happened between you and I is in the past. Times have changed and attitudes have changed. I am at a whole other level now these days. At the Royal Rumble I am going to prove just that when I end your title reign. Oh one last thing because I know how badly these fans really want to hear you speak once again so I am going to end my speech sooner than I want to, but about that payday well here....

CM Punk pulls out a few single dollar bills and throws them at Bully Ray

CM Punk: Do me a favor and buy yourself a bar of soap with that payday!

The crowd can't believe CM Punk just basically punked out Bully Ray. Bully Ray looks on ready to start pounding on CM Punk though, but controls himself and gets ready to speak
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Guitar riffs are heard before drums and a screaming vocal as Rollins has a brand new theme 'Battle On (War of Ages'). Rollins comes out wearing black clothing which looks like some sort of bulletproof vest. He stands by the entrance ramp as he yells out as he looks towards the crowd.



Rollins then walks down the entrance ramp as the crowd heavily boo's Rollins, ignoring the crowd he hops up onto the steel steps as he shakes his head before entering the ring.



Once entering the ring he goes to the nearest turnbuckle and poses to the crowd allowing the crowd to boo him some more.



Rollins then hops down from the turnbuckle as he then lets his hand go down, he then asks for a microphone.



Seth Rollins:

This is a waste of time, a complete waste of time. Hearing you pretenders speak about being the winner, of course this match has everyone wanting to win. Striving for that utmost opportunity, but have you ever looked at yourself and realised what you've accomplished lately is nothing equivilient to what the 'Purveyors of Poison' have been doing? After all we're the hottest trend in U-W-F right now, does it cross your egotistical minds that I am in fact dangerous and this match isn't ordinary to my liking whatsoever, tossing one over the top-rope is the easiest thing in the entire world. But battling a match one-on-one for a good twenty five minute can be deemed as a challenge. There isn't a challenge in this match at all, throwing one over the top rope is not a challenge to me. I see this stipulation as one of the most stupidest thing wrestling's ever invented, the opportunity is sure what I crave for but really... Having so many people in the ring trying to push one another with limited wrestling, tossing one another over the top rope... I could be four-hundred pounds and you wouldn't be able to push me over the ropes, don't you think this match is unfair? There are many in this match that doesn't deserve such opportunity. Only one can win, the rest... known as losers. I shouldn't have to stand out here, speak for hours and say why I am going to win, my chances don't look too great regardless... Some have already been in Rumbles before; in fact... Lately on N-X-T, I've had to face these no-namers, I've been screwed around week in, week out... I'm being screwed once again by being placed in this match, surely I'll compete but I'm happily eliminating myself first and I'll tell you why... I've got better things to do at the Rumble, this match doesn't include it... I'm unpredictable.

Rollins drops his microphone as he walks out of the ring and heads out back somewhere.

OOC: Excuse my shitty TT but I am very sick and wanted to get one up.


 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

As everyone is looking at each other fans in the arena sit and wait all of a sudden

[video=youtube;euqR1YhrHgw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euqR1YhrHgw[/video]

Roode music hit as Robert Roode comes out, and he dosen't look all to please. Roode begins to look around as he kicks one of the chairs down from Hawkins and Reks as he looks upset Roode begins to speak

summerofdestinyresults35.jpg


Robert Roode: Cut it... Cut my damn music

fans boo as Robert Roode begins to speak

Robert Roode: Before I get to you degenerates let me say one thing... first off once again I Robert Roode the IT FACTOR of the UWF was screwed. Not only did I not get my rightful number 30 spot, but Triple H the Smackdown general manager came out to the ring and set up a match with Shawn Michaels. Now Shawn I know your out here, and I know your mad about what I did to your friend Triple H, but right now is the time and the place to deal with you. Second off, now I have to wrestle two... not one but two matches at the Royal rumble are you kidding me this is a freaking joke. I am Robert Roode I don't have time to waste with Shawn, and I definitely don't have time to waste with any of you maggots in the ring.

Roode's frustrations continues to show as he grabs the other chair and he throws it over the stage and he begins to speak once again

Robert Roode: You people if you eliminate me don't think you're better then me. No! Just consider yourself lucky. I mean do you guys not understand what is going on here? I have to wrestle two matches? Not one, but two matches and the fact you people on Smackdown have to fight for the Royal Rumble number 30 spot is ridiculous. A man like Damien Sandow for all the good he has done on Smackdown doesn't get rewarded he just gets vilified and hated for his actions, but then a man like Jeff Jarrett could wrongfully earn a spot like that? Don't you see how ridiculous this is?

I've had enough and even though I am forced in the situation to wrestle in two matches, and even though I may be at the disadvantage in this match let me tell you all something.. all of you will pay. All of you men in this ring keep talking about your dreams.. keep talking about how you want to headline Wrestlemania, because you know what no matter you say or do I will be there to crush them. After I crush Shawn Michaels in my match later that night I will be there to crush every single on of you. You all know I have the capability to beat every single one of you in that very ring. Didn't you see what I did to the man use to be known to us as Triple H? I crushed him! I destroyed him. I showed him why it pays to be rude.


fans boo as Roode looks on as he begins to speak once more

Robert Roode: Hate me all you want. Tell me I suck I don't give a damn you people are just a load of crap anyways... but what I am telling you right now it is not my dream to win the Rumble... no it is my right and my pleasure to win the Royal Rumble. I don't give a damn who steps in my way. I don't give a damn who is in front of me. Most of you can spew out all the nonsense all you want. You can tell me that you are better then me, but until you beat me one on one in this ring, until you make me submit, or make me pin you will never be as good as me. I am the IT FACTOR! I am the one at the end of the night when smoke is all clear will be standing on the top of turnbuckle pointing at the Wrestlemania sign... and when it is all said and done I will be the next UWF Champion.

Fans boo as Roode just looks on with major intent in his eyes
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Eddie makes his way down the ramp and enters the ring, raising his microphone to his mouth again as he points in the direction of the "Party Starter" Curt Hawkins.

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You might want to take a closer look at your surroundings, ese', before you go throwing your weight around anymore than you already have and end up looking like a fool when one of the men you're slandering inevitably rises up and usurps you in this match. In the eyes of these fans, it doesn't matter, they flock to your verbal diarrhea like the proverbial flies that they are, they hang on your every word, they love to be pandered to as much as you love to do the pandering, but that's because they're only buying the tickets to watch the show, they aren't a part of it like the men standing out here are, and because they won't be competing, that and their diminished states of intelligence keep them from viewing this situation the way that I'm warning you to view it.

When you take a second look at things I want you to realize that one of the fish swimming amongst the school isn't like the others, he's a piranha and just like you, he smells blood in the water and will seize every drop of it until his palate has been satisfied. You and I are both feeling as though our brand isn't utilizing us correctly, you and I are both hungry for the opportunity to shine brighter than any of the other stars that make up the constellations that are our respective brands, which means the Royal Rumble isn't a tossing competition between thirty men, it's a foot race between two. But I'm finished with using unrealistic numbers, because in all actuality holmes, the Rumble isn't being contested between thirty men, it's being contested amongst thirteen.


The crowd boos this statement for a moment as Eddie becomes silent, the fans not appreciating Eddie downsizing the competition and discrediting seventeen superstars as though they don't have a dog in the fight. Eddie continues.

Where do I get that number from? It's simple. Seven of the participants are nameless and faceless, and eight of the announced participants have yet to come out here and say anything. Mister Anderson, Christopher Daniels, Zack Ryder, Brock Lesnar, Darren Young, John Cena, Brian Kendrick, and Rob Van Dam have seemingly taken their ticket to the big dance and wiped their culo with it, ese', and that makes me absolutely SICK because these are the men that continue to get booked week after week! These are the men that have guaranteed spots on the show every time Smackdown, Raw, or NXT go on the air while the Eddie Guerreros of this promotion flounder in obscurity and starve after the same morsels of food that these ungrateful pendejos are throwing away!

You've raised that microphone the most out of anyone standing out here in the ring and lounging back there in the backstage, and while that puts you at an advantage, it also puts me at one. When you addressed everyone from Christian to Miz, you forgot me, and now that I'm addressing that fact and I'm addressing you, you'll have no choice but to respond to me, and that's where my advantage exists. You only have one bullet left in the chamber, one last opportunity to make your voice heard, so you'll be especially pressured to ensure each and every word counts and you say everything you need to say, because you won't get another chance. When you next finish speaking, your microphone will be cut off and that'll be it!


Eddie looks at Curt with intensity, becoming silent again as the crowd boos his comments, showing their support for Hawkins and their disdain for Guerrero. After a moment, Eddie continues speaking once more.

Me on the other hand, I have three bullets left in the chamber, which means while you're put on the sidelines after your final bullet is fired, my biggest competition in this match is eliminated from this verbal exchange and I am better able to stand out in this crowd of lesser life. That's right vato, I give you your due, but don't confuse it for respect or a change of heart on my part, I was born a rudo and I'll die one ese', regardless of the alignment of the other members of this roster. I acknowledge you as a credible adversary because I would be stupid not to, a man that underestimates his opponents is headed for embarassment, holmes, and that's where you messed up.

And I'm not talking about you selling a man like Jeff Jarrett short or overlooking the accomplishments of someone like Christian, those things don't affect me. Your fatal error was insulting me in the greatest way you possibly could by saying absolutely nothing to me, by not acknowledging me as someone that should be considered not only a credible opponent or a legitimate threat, but someone who is worthy of being a participant in this match. You treated me like these people have treated me, in the same way every member of management has treated me, in the same way my friends and family have treated me! YOU...FORGOT...ME!


Eddie is turning red and shaking from the frustration as the vein in his neck is visibly bulging. He falls silent once again, looking down at the mat, seemingly unable to stomach looking at Curt Hawkins any longer, then he looks up and stares at him intensely again, continuing with what he has to say.

No more of this disrespect will be tolerated, I'm going to make you an example, Curt, but don't worry, you'll go down as an honest man because these people will remember your name, they'll remember it in conjunction with the reminder of my name. Their psyches will forever be embedded with who and what Eddie Guerrero is after they witness the things I do, and they'll remember Curt Hawkins not as the man that was quickly and painlessly stricken down, but as the one that was placed on the rotisserie for awhile and suffered through a slow burn!

And not only will they remember your name, but I'll be keeping another one of your vows when the party effectively comes to an end. But you see, even though you're a grown man, when I hear you call yourself the, "Party Starter" I don't envision a celebrity packed club event with hot music, alcohol, and senoritas as far as the eye can see, not at all, holmes. You're the Major brother, the pendejo that traded his antics with Zack Ryder for a Chippendale's act with a man I can most accurately describe as the Tyson Tomko to your Christian Cage, as much as that comparison is going to bother you.

Because of that, I see the events you start being more along the lines of a child's birthday party with all of the fixings from the clown and the cake to the balloons and the children's games. I view things that way for three reasons, Curt. For starters, when you carry yourself as someone who shouldn't be taken seriously, you won't be, so you brought this on yourself. Secondly, I do it for the simple purpose of belittling you. But thirdly, and best of all, viewing it that way, a picture of happiness and overall contentment with life, makes what is going to come to pass all the more enjoyable.

I will be the drunken relative that sabotages the entire ordeal; destroying the presents, knocking over the picnic table that the food and the cake are sitting on, popping some of the balloons and simply untying others and watching them fly away, etcetera. Except instead of being under the influence of alcohol, I am drunk with power, Curt, inebriated with rage and because of this I possess the clarity to be able to carry out these things and where it's a mishap brought about by the distorted bodily functions of the relative, I will intend to do every act that these hands commit, ese'!


Eddie points at every man standing in the ring around them.

Until one of these men gives me a reason to divide my attention, this is exactly as I explained it earlier, an issue between two men, a race between you and I to see who gets the change they want and the opportunity they hunger for. So you make certain that you're still in the match when I come in as number thirty, because it would be a shame not to get my hands on you after I've put so much time into envisioning it in my head and painting the picture with my words.

A vindictive smile appears on Eddie's face as he lowers his microphone and waits for Hawkins to respond or another superstar to join the fray.
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

[video=youtube;mlR-NLWfOy4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlR-NLWfOy4[/video]

As John Cena's entrance music blares out of the speakers, the audience stands up on their feet and explodes in cheers for one half of the Tag Team Champions. Once the intense drums kick in, Cena makes his way out onto the stage, excited as always, with his Tag Team Championship slinging across his waist. Cena is rocking brand new gear, as we see cargo shorts, and blue armbands, a blue cap and shirt. Cena stops mid-stage, as he turns his head to the camera before saying "Thirty men, one winner, and one John Cena. Y'all are looking at the winner already folks, let's do this!" Cena faces forward before slowly raising his hand to his face, saluting the ring as he springs forward before charging down the entrance ramp. Cena continues his journey to the ring as he passes the entrance ramp and slides into the ring. Cena springs up, as he claps his hands, and bounces off the ropes. Cena has a huge smile on his face, as he nods his head, in approval of the reception tonight. Cena walks over to the corner, grabbing a microphone as he begins to speak.

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John Cena: Look at all of these people here tonight in Phoenix, Arizona! From the very first row of seats, to the guys keeping it steady in the nosebleeds, we even have people in the ceiling because this is going to be a historic event, and it will be remembered, and it will go down in history, because after this intense match, for the first time in history, the Royal Rumble winner will be crowned! For seconds, minutes, days and months I have been waiting for this moment to arrive, and I gotta tell you, excited would be an obvious understatement. From the days of recent memory when I was down and out. To the days of those where they told me the mission at hand was impossible. I have been chasing, scratching and clawing for one thing and one thing only, and that thing, is the very thing I shall fight, and it is the right to main event WrestleMania and become the World Champion!

Cena is cheered by the audience for stating his promise in the Royal Rumble match. Cena looks around the ring, scanning the participants, as he continues.

John Cena: However, this match does not come without a cost. I know if I were to be unsuccessful in this match, everything I worked hard to achieve on this very day would be diminished. All effort for no reward. I can live with that. Coming into this match, or better-yet fighting to earn it back. This isn't gonna be easy, nor should it be for that matter. Because every man who is about to step foot inside this ring, is walking in there with the intention of winning. The stakes are high, and this is it. You either walk out the winner, or you'll be eliminated as a failure. And if there's one thing I'm not, it's a failure. I have been to hell and back, and my career isn't exactly going as I pictured it. My luck has been here, there, and everywhere but where I need it to be. But you know what I realize? You don't need luck to get where you're going. You just need to find a way to adapt and overcome. And in the Royal Rumble? I will adapt and overcome.

Cena nods his head, soaking in the cheers from the audience.

John Cena: I've been in plenty of Royal Rumbles, and I am a former Royal Rumble winner myself. I most certainly have the experience, folks, and you bet your ass I'm gonna use that to my advantage. However, I've lost plenty of them. I looked failure in the face before. I woke up the next morning and what I saw in that mirror whilst brushing my teeth, was far from the regular routine. What I saw, was a guy who had to give absolutely everything in order to win. But, he didn't. At the time, and as it were happening? I thought I did. Don't get me wrong, I went out there with nothing but the utmost intention to walk out the winner. But when I woke up the very next morning and I didn't win? I knew otherwise. I knew that I didn't give that match enough. And you know, it's like they say. "Most of the time, ninety-nine percent is good enough". Just not good enough to win those Royal Rumbles. And I know that now. Believe me, I know it all too well. I've been there before, and this time I will be there again. Only this time...

The audience awaits in confusion, as Cena cracks a slight smile, before continuing.

John Cena: This time; I will conquer the Royal Rumble. I will give this match one hundred and ten percent. I will walk away the victor, I will outlast the other twenty nine men, I will main event WrestleMania, and I will become the next World Champion! Speaking about the other twenty nine men, I see, uh, a lot of new faces. A lot of familiar faces. I've faced off against plenty of these guys present currently, and there's still a lot of guys I haven't been in the ring with. That doesn't matter because there's one thing in common they all have. They all are willing to battle in this war known as the Royal Rumble with one thing in mind. That's emerging victorious and main eventing WrestleMania. And, nothing makes me more excited because once these guys are eliminated and they realize they don't have a chance to win? Their faces are gonna be pretty, uh, priceless, so make sure you folks are ready to snapshot them, he-he.

The audience laughs along with Cena, as the other participants in the ring aren't agreeing with the "joke". Cena scans the ring once more, before continuing.

John Cena: There's upcoming newcomers in this match, there's men who're so close to seizing the opportunity and making the most of it, and there's legends in this match. They've all made great points, honestly. However, instead of expecting to win because of how good you seem to think you really are? You all need to ask yourself one... simple... question. How bad do you want to become the Royal Rumble winner? How bad do you want to that main event spot in WrestleMania? Because when it comes to me? I can't stop, won't stop, and simply cannot be stopped! I have worked way too hard to get to where I am today, and the bus ride for all of you gentlemen ends when John Cena is entered into this match. You can all talk about it, or we can do something about it because me? I'm winning this match and I'm going on to main event WrestleMania for each and every single one of my fans!

Cena nods his head, as the audience explodes in cheers. Cena has a huge smile on his face as he continues for the final time before someone else speaks.

John Cena: This goes out to everyone in this match, I haven't said this in a while but now since it's every man for himself, if you want some, you know where to find me. With that being said, come get some!

With passion and fire in his words, Cena lowers the microphone, as someone else in the match speaks.​
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking

Damien Sandow:

Silence! Will you simpletons be silent for one moment, the sheer scale of your ignorance is causing me a migraine, for the fact that people so…

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*Sandow looks around almost looking like he’s about to vomit from what he sees*

Like all of you, are allowed a microphone to speak your “minds” is almost sickening. There is a reason we do not hand out microphones to the audience here, and that is because some people are too ignorant to be allowed the influence of speech in front of such impressionable ignoramuses such as the UWF Audience. Which is precisely one of the factors I am saving them from, for once I claim the Worlds Heavyweight Championship my word will become the only one listened to and with that these people will learn how to do just that…learn. Something all of you should try before you come out here and behave like children.

*Sandow turns in the direction of Hawkins*

Children like the two of you, who make grand claims and yet have no validity behind their mottos. You want change, and yet how is that change going to come? Because if it is somehow brought by your rise to the top, the only change I foresee is a lowering number on the IQ of the average viewer and society itself. I would be worried for these peoples safety if I weren’t so certain that dimwits such as you have no chance of being taken seriously even by their simple minds. You however have gone to call me boring, I am not boring if anyone is weary and not interesting it is the two of you. You simply do not comprehend anything I speak because you’re the troublesome child who does not understand the lesson so he must cause trouble to distract from the fact that he is ignorant. My entrance music is not awful; your taste in music is awful. If I were to say to you The Symphony number 9 in E Minor you wouldn’t even know where to start to figure out what I speak of. That however is irrelevant, which is what most people’s jabs at me have been. You can talk about my taste in music, which is obviously more sophisticated than yours, even though it has no importance whatsoever. Or you can talk about what I wear, which I’ll have you know Mr. Christian that this is made of the finest Egyptian cotton, my facial hair or my in ring attire. All of this is irrelevant, which is precisely why I believe so many other superstars seem to focus on it because they themselves are irrelevant.

Sandow turns his head to Jarrett

Like you Mr. Jarrett, I held two championships simultaneously I only lost them because of factors beyond my control. See the issue with you is that you do not comprehend what you really are, nothing...you are not talented and yet you convince people in charge that you are which awards you opportunity after opportunity. You are not intimidating and yet you insist in attempting to talk down to people like you could do whatever you’d like, I’ve proven my superiority over you and yet you speak as if you could defeat me whenever you wanted. You are nothing more than a hot-headed imbecile, one who I would suggest learns a lesson but I see now that your simple mind cannot handle such a task. Therefore I suggest you simply remain silent and stop embarrassing yourself, so that your incompetence cannot infect the last brain cells left in these people’s minds. Thank you.

*Sandow adjusts the sleeve of his coat with a tug, before turning towards Eddie Guerrero*

Mr. Edward Guerrero, it seems to me you are quite irritated, which is what I often feel when having to deal with the lot of this roster. Often times my simple teachings feels like trying to explain arithmetic to a toddler, however I feel you need to collect yourself for if this is your state going into the Rumble bout I’d hate to see your level of anger once you come up short. I say this for your own good, for you seem to worry yourself with your position in the company or on the card, and you put so much behind this that I fear you might snap your capable mind into nothingness if you continue down this road. Look no further for an example than that of the person holding the championship on Raw, he put so much into what happened with the people in charge that he became deranged maniac who cannot enjoy any success because of that insanity. My advice to you Mr. Guerrero is to accept this level for what it is, so I will impart towards you an offer, if you really want to persevere in our business to show up to this bout not for your own victory but for the victory of someone else. Assist in my assured victory, and your stock will rise as I will impart towards you the lesson of self-worth, you will realize that I am the answer to this dilemma and sacrifice your own spot for the greater good. Myself. Please do contemplate this offer.

*Sandow speaks out towards Robert Roode*

An offer I would even extend towards you Mr. Roode, for you are a man whose eyes are not clouded by the smoke and mirrors put up to keep these ignorant people in the dark. You know this generation has turned into one of selfishness; however that is what I am attempting to right. So that the truly talented emerge in our world instead of having people with less be put in a pedestal simply because they knew how to manipulate these people and chose to do so. You face Mr. Shawn Michaels at this event, and in my debut here in UWF I defeated Shawn Michaels, I know you have what it takes to down this closed minded simpleton with little effort. However while you may have abandoned these fans because of their ignorance, I choose to save them, to show them how to think and realize that people like these men are not to be made an idol. You have two bouts, so I suggest you secure the salvation of this company, no…society itself by assisting in my message. For once I do emerge victorious, you will have full reign over your own serial to rise to the top with my reign over my own. However if you choose not to take said offer I assure you I understand wholeheartedly, for you would do it respectfully. Something I can’t say for this false idol among us.

*Sandow faces Cena with a look of disgust on his face*

John Cena, Do you remember the offer I imparted towards you when we first met? It was one where you joined my word and used your manipulative control over the ignorant masses to spread my lessons and save these people from their own self-imposed ignorance. But you refused, because you want these people to stay the way they are, so you can continue to turn their children to side with you. So they follow your bad example, just so you can remain relevant. These people are suffering from the disease of incompetence, but you are the one who is infecting them with it. This is why I will take back my tag team championship from you, and win this bout so your influence dwindles down to nothing. I will save these people from their ignorance, but I shall also save them from the likes of false idols such as you.

*Sandow turns to the crowd, looking up as he speaks out to everyone*

As for the rest of you, you are all behaving atrociously, you are handling this opportunity like children and you do not understand that you should simply be honored to be part of my grandest lesson. So please do stop embarrassing yourselves, comprehend that this bout is only mine to emerge victorious from, and learn that you can either assist in my teachings or be eradicated like the rest
.​
 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: Rumble Trashtalking



bateman-1.jpg


Derrick Bateman looks astonished by the amount of trash coming out from everyone's mouth. He soon becomes irate.

Derrick Bateman
Shut up! I can't even think with all you yapping. Just give me a second.


Derrick Bateman gets very upset as he jumps off the apron and heads to the back with Johnny Curtis and Maxine.

 

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Re: UWF Royal Rumble: NXT Championship - Bully Ray [c] vs. CM Punk

Bully looks at the dollar notes on the floor as the crowd lap up the mockery. After a few moments the face tells a story as Bully looks at Punk dumbfounded, and almost confused.

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Bully Ray: Did you… Did you really just throw bills at me?! Ha… oh… You are NOT serious right now are you? We all know that is how you got your relationship with old Amy Dumbass! Matt Hardy, Edge, and Kane of all peoples, sloppy seconds started up, but I do not play second fiddle to no-one, mister best in the world on UWF Video games. That is why it is I that can proudly hoist this championship up in the air, showing the world that I am indeed the man… and it is you that can only look on, dreaming that you could be in my position, with that vein popping out of your neck, wishing that the belt would grow a pair of legs and walk over to you, THAT is the only chance you would have of holding it. You can come out here and make your jokes that are so bad only people from Phoenix, Arizona would find any humor in, you can come out here and tell everybody about your past successes, but in the same sentence say times in your career that made you look your weak and puny self are all in the past and should be forgotten about. Undisputed champion in this company, that you were, but what you fail to explain is that you were that Undisputed champion at its inception, at its weakest. Before I even arrived you had lost that title and spiralled down into a non-entity. But if what has happened between me and you has gone in the past, then so has that accomplishment, your US title accomplishments, in which you would have lost to me had I been given the chance on Monday Night Raw. But like you said. History is history, all of that goes behind us and we base everything on the here and now.

Bully waits for Punk to agree, before continuing to speak.

And the here and now is as simple as this Punk. I’m the champion; You’re not. I’m the star; You’re not. In my dominance here on NXT the nay-sayers had one more pop at me saying I could not defeat the undefeated Miz. The high-rising unstoppable juggernaut run into me at New Years Revolution and rebounded off me like as if he hit a brick wall, and when I put him through the table, and defended my title, there was no more anybody could say. I had proved every single doubter wrong in three steps. I defended my championship against The Miz, before that I captured the championship against Randy Orton, and I guess the most important step right now, was me gaining contendership by beating your sorry ass! And yeah, that time I didn’t take the “ECW loser†route and put you through a table did I? No, that time, I beat you your way, the hook the leg and the one.. two… three way. You talk about how you back every thing you say up? I don’t even need my words to do the talking for me. My actions and my destructive path make all the noise I need made.

The only noise being heard right now is booing, of The Bully’s rant on his supremacy. Not that the booing puts him off though….

You’re on a streak huh? You’re on a roll, a good set of victories behind ya? Good for you. So did The Miz. The Miz had arguably a better one than you and that finished uglier for him than a car wreck. I have been in this situation already as champion, I am prepared for you. The thing that people fail to understand is simply, that there’s a misconception of when people get the championship in their possession, and they are suddenly not going to improve no more. They are at the very top that they could be at this moment in their career as a world champion, and they’re just waiting to be taken off their perch. That might be some peoples way of doing it but where I’m from, the Hells Kitchen way? If you’re at the top you got the furthest to fall, you’re the most vulnerable and the most likely to be taken out, so you gotta really up your game not to get to the top, but to stay there! So in saying that who’s the one that is really on a streak here, me or you? I’ve been on my streak ever since coming back and taking you out of the gold rush tournament, and I have never looked back. You made a match with Rhino look like a difficult task and you scraped through with the right result. That’s not a streak that’s a scrap of good fortune, and I wouldn’t bank on it continuing.

Come the Royal Rumble Punk, you will realize that your victory against Rhino, is your loss in the long run. You so desire to make it to Wrestlemania so much that you have fought for a one on one match with me. But a one on one match with Bully Ray, is a guarantee of a loss for you. You would have been better off just sacrificing this match you have with me, waiting in line like all the other rejects, has-beens, and superstars who have already had their chance, and take a ticket to the lottery that is known as The Royal Rumble match itself. In the main ambition of making it in the main event of Wrestlemania, it was the only chance you had. Spanning way back to even my Monday Night Raw days, my ambition has always been the same… and it’s the same as yours. I will headline Wrestlemania. Walking in, Walking out... Champion. Royal Rumble? It’s just a dress rehearsal.


Bully stares at Punk seeing whether he is going to respond or not.​​
 
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