Extreme Rules 2010
Right away, the show is supposed to start with Triple H vs Sheamus in a Street Fight. But as it turns out, Sheamus jumped HHH backstage and took a pipe to his neck, which causes nerve damage and giving him a handicap later. So then The Miz and Big Show, who were the tag team champions with the WORST MASHUP THEME EVER, come out even though they’re not supposed to be on the show and demand a challenge. Teddy Long comes out because he loves tag team matches and says that Miz and Big Show will face a tag team, and Miz keeps talking shit so Teddy makes it 2 tag teams, and Miz keeps talking shit so Teddy makes it 3 tag teams. And he says that if any of the teams are able to beat Show and Miz, they’ll get a title shot on Raw the next night. Because apparently, in the time Miz and Show were talking before Teddy got out there, he not only got 1, but 3 teams ready, all wearing their gear already despite none of them were booked so they didn’t even need to show up. Really making it hard for me to suspend my disbelief here.
Match 1: Gauntlet Match - The Miz & Big Show def. R-Truth & John Morrison via DQ, MVP & Mark Henry; The Hart Dynasty def. The Miz & Big Show (5:22)
As you could probably tell, I had no idea how to format that result since it was really just a gauntlet match for Miz and Show that would’ve ended if they lost. First team was Truth and Morrison, who again, are already in their gear. How convenient. As you could also see, despite it being a gauntlet match it was also very short. First match was the longest with Truth just getting bodied by Big Show. Morrison gets his team DQ’d by putting Big Show in a Tarantula over the ropes and not letting go before the referee counts to five. MVP and Henry are next to come out and again, very short match. Big Show knocks MVP out with a punch and Miz covers him. And then The Hart Dynasty run out, knock Big Show off the apron and hit their version of the Hart Attack on Miz to win this definitely impromptu match.
My Rating: *
Match 2: If Punk lost, he would get his head shaved - CM Punk def. Rey Mysterio (15:57)
Pretty damn good match, it just felt like it was missing something honestly. I don’t know if this is a hot take or not, but I enjoyed their match at Over the Limit more. The first half of the match isn’t anything to write home about. Punk wears down Mysterio, but eventually Rey, manages to reverse a GTS attempt and arm drag Punk into the ropes. Mysterio goes for the 619, but Serena Deeb trips him, which makes the referee send her and Gallows to the back. Rey hits a sick springboard moonsault onto Punk outside and from here, the match is pretty well paced. Rey springboards off the ropes and Punk hits a perfectly timed dropkick to him out of the air. Rey manages to avoid the GTS a couple more times and he head scissors Punk into the ropes, hits the 619, but as he waits for Punk to get up, some guy in a hoodie (probably Solo Sikoa), slides a chair into the ring behind the referees back. And while the referee is distracted by that, he grabs Rey in a powerbomb position and falls back, dropping Rey on his face. Punk throws Rey back in the ring and finally hits the GTS to put Rey away.
My Rating: ***3/4
Match 3: Strap Match - JTG def. Shad Gaspard (4:41)
An alright match, but it just was too short and hardly had any time. But to be honest, I’m surprised they gave these guys this match considering they did absolutely nothing with either of them afterward. Basically, they whip each other with the strap. JTG plays smarter in order to beat Shad. This was touch all corners rules. Shad drags JTG behind him as he goes around to touch the corners, but JTG touches them as they make the rounds. Seen this strategy before, many times in fact. Before Shad can reach the last corner, JTG hits a slingblade and touches the final corner. So Shad turns heel and gets a new gimmick and loses the feud. Not a good look for him.
My Rating: *1/2
Match 4: World Heavyweight Championship Extreme Rules Match - Jack Swagger (c) def. Randy Orton (13:45)
Ya know, for a PPV titled “Extreme Rules”, there isn’t a lot here thats very extreme. And despite this being an Extreme Rules Match, there was hardly anything extreme about this match. The build up to this match was awful by the way. Not that I’m a Jack Swagger fan, but if you’re going to put the title on him, you probably shouldn’t book him to lose every match he has after winning the thing. Orton beats up Swagger in the early going, but then it turns into Swagger dominating Orton in the most boring fashion. Like, my god guy. It’s an Extreme Rules Match my guy. You can literally cheat legally! Orton eventually starts to make the comeback and now the match starts to get good. He bashes a trash can off Swagger’s head and brings a steel chair into the ring. After hitting a draping DDT, he goes for an RKO onto the chair, but Swagger counters and throws Orton onto the chair, then picks him up for the Gutwrench Powerbomb to continue his underwhelming World Title reign. And then after the match, Orton RKOs Swagger on the floor. Hmm… So I’m confused, do you like Jack Swagger orrrrrr?
My Rating: ***
Match 5: Street Fight - Sheamus def. Triple H (15:50)
And as Orton is making his way up the ramp, Sheamus walks out and says that if HHH won’t bring himself out there, he wants to be declared the winner by forfeit. We cut backstage to show HHH walking out of the trainer’s room. And even though Triple H is suffering from nerve damage, he beats up Sheamus for a few minutes after making it down there, but a Pedigree attempt shows he can’t use his left arm. And from here, Sheamus just beats up HHH for like 10 minutes. Like good lord. This is the second match in a row which has a No DQ stipulation and yet the heels treat it like its a regular match. Fucking hell. Yeah, unlike the last match which got a comeback to hold up the final stretch, there was no engaging comeback. Triple H does grab a kendo stick, which he uses against Sheamus, sometimes with both arms, sometimes with one. Sheamus back drops HHH onto the stage from a Pedigree attempt and hits him with a Brogue Kick. He drags HHH back in the ring and hits another one. HHH stands himself back up slowly in the corner. Sheamus hits with another, the only thing holding Triple H up are the ropes and Sheamus drops him with a 4th Brogue Kick to win the match and because his name isn’t Roman Reigns, Triple H doesn’t kick out of it. Sheamus wins and HHH refuses medical help, wanting to leave on his own power, but Sheamus runs back out and kicks HHH again, making sure, that he would be getting medical help which was actually kinda sick.
My Rating: **1/2
Match 6: Women’s Championship Extreme Makeover Match - Beth Phoenix def. Michelle McCool (c) (6:35)
What can I say about this match? It’s pre-four horsewomen WWE match so you know they ain’t getting a lot of time and on top of that, they’re getting a match insulting of them and to us because we have to watch it. Beth beats up Michelle for a couple minutes. Michelle sprays hairspray into Beth’s eyes and brings in a couple ironing boards into the ring because of course she does. There is a makeup table outside the ring, which hardly any makeup gets used, but then again, what the hell was I expecting? Beth goes for a superplex onto the ironing boards, but Vickie Guerrero and Layla swat at her feet with a broom and a mop. Yes, I’m serious. Now that I think about it, what the hell does ironing boards, mops and brooms have to do with makeup? Michelle throws Beth off onto the boards. Beth escapes a Widow’s Peak attempt and hits the Glam Slam to win the title.
My Rating: *1/4
Match 7: Steel Cage Match - Edge def. Chris Jericho (20:00)
Huh. Somehow I remember this being better. They made it seem like this was gonna be a war. But I don’t know, this just felt really tedious. Especially since Jericho constantly had to stop himself from winning the match to give Edge time to catch him. It’s a far cry from the cage match they had on SmackDown in ‘02. Before the match begins, Jericho grabs a steel chair to the door and Edge goes out for Chris himself, causing Jericho to drop the chair at the door. Halfway through the match, Jericho slams the cage door in Edge's face and has an opportunity to escape. But chooses to stay and beat up Edge some more. At a later point in the match, there is a moment where Edge is standing on the top rope, leaning back on the cage to balance himself. And Jericho springboards off the ropes along another side to hit a Codebreaker! Not crazy about this match but that spot was sick! I also like when we come close to the end, when Edge attacks Jericho's ankle, the body part Edge injured last year and that Jericho mocked him for. Edge tells Chris to "leave" in a mocking tone, although it was clear Edge wasn't letting Jericho go anywhere and finishes him off with a Spear.
My Rating: ***1/4
Main Event: WWE Championship Last Man Standing Match - John Cena (c) def. Batista (24:33)
After an underwhelming event, at least the main event ends the show on a high note. Yeah, this match was great. The first half of the match wasn’t anything to write home about. It was mainly Batista attacking Cena’s legs, trying to make it harder for him to stand. I will say it and stand by it, the short lived Batista heel run from late ‘09 to May 2010 is underrated. He was more aggressive and more pissed off than he’d ever been at around this time. If they weren’t limited by the PG restrictions, I can only imagine the things they could’ve done with him at this point. Batista grabs a toolbox from underneath which would come back to bite him later in the match. This match is also where the infamous clip of the kid screaming “I hate you Batista!” And him yelling back “I hate you too!” comes from. Which is hilarious. Batista whips Cena into the barricade which completely collapses the thing. Batista sets up the steel steps over by the announce table and takes Cena up the steps with him and plans to drop him through with a powerbomb. But Cena escapes and lifts Batista up on his shoulders before dropping him through the table! Batista gets back up and Cena goes outside to grab a table, before setting it up in the middle of the ring. He picks Batista back up and tries to drop him through that table, but Batista slides off, sends Cena off the ropes and when Cena comes back, Batista drops Cena through the table with a spinebuster. Cena gets back up and a pissed off Batista picks Cena up and hits the Batista Bomb and yells at the referee to count. Cena gets up again, and Batista immediately goes outside to grab the steel steps, specifically the bottom half and places it in the ring. He tries for the Batista Bomb on the steps, but Cena drop toe holds Batista to the mat and puts him in the STF to try to get the big man to pass out. But Batista gets back up and Cena goes outside to grab the duct tape that came out of the toolbox. He trips Batista and pulls him back against the ring post, crotching him and then tapes his feet together. I’ve heard that there are people who hate this finish. Me personally, I thought it was brilliant. A hot explosive finish is awesome but I love a good clever finish. Where somebody uses their smarts to take the win. And taping Batista’s legs together around the ring post was a smart move on Cena’s part. Great match to end the night.
My Rating: ****
Cagematch Rating: 6.23
My Rating: 5.5/10
Not a horrible show per se. I’ve certainly seen worse. But they never really give me a reason to give a shit about it. I wasn’t exactly enthusiastic about revisiting this show. Matter of fact, I don’t think I’d ever watched it all in one sitting before. This show has two matches worth watching. That’s it. Cage Match was solid, but it went 20 minutes. I’ll say it over and over again, a match that long needs to be better. At least the night ended in a high note.