WrestleMania VII
Match 1: The Rockers def. Haku & The Barbarian (10:41)
The night starts off with a very good match. A nice battle of speed vs power. And early on in the match, The Rockers keep the powerful team on their toes with double teams. Really liked when The Rockers are doing their usual double hip toss, double elbow, double superkick spot, The Barbarian just bowls over them both. Haku has Marty in a powerbomb position, and Barbarian jumps in, grabs Marty by the hair and drops him throat first on the top rope. From there, Haku and Barbarian wear down Jannetty and isolate him from Shawn. And they do this for a while so that unfortunately slows the match down, but it makes them go even more crazy for Shawn Michaels. Barbarian counters a dive from Jannetty into a powerslam and makes the mistake of trying a diving headbutt. Marty tags in Shawn, who takes on both men at the same time pretty much. We get a fast paced finish with the Rockers sending Barbarian to the outside. Jannetty hits Haku with a dropkick from the top rope and Shawn ends the match with a crossbody to Haku to win the opener at WrestleMania.
My Rating: ***1/2
Match 2: Texas Tornado def. Dino Bravo (3:11)
Actually kind of a sad match when you think about it. This match happened in 1991 and both men would be gone by 1994. Dino jumps Kerry as soon as he gets in the ring and takes the fight to him immediately. Not a bad match actually for 3 minutes. Just a fight that’s over quickly. Kerry kicks out of Dino’s side slam, Dino comes off the ropes and Kerry catches him in the claw, before spinning and knocking him out with a punch to the head.
My Rating: **
Match 3: British Bulldog def. The Warlord (8:15)
Weird fact for you. Bulldog and Warlord had the longest feud of this entire year because holy hell. They fought each other on every PPV WWF put out this year. They crossed paths in the Rumble, fought one on one here, the 6-man tag at SummerSlam, a great Survivor Series Match and again one on one at This Tuesday in Texas. Although this match was much better than that one, even though it still isn’t good. Warlord was using the Full Nelson at this point, and was Chris Masters before Chris Masters ever came to WWE, because he does an interview and says “nobody’s ever broken out of my Full Nelson. So of course, the match hinges on that. Not a great match, but its okay enough. What was great about this match was how Bulldog, despite being just as strong (if not stronger) than Warlord, he was much, much more athletic and this actually did a good job of proving that point. Warlord slaps the Full Nelson on Bulldog and has it in (kinda) for about a good minute and a half before Bulldog breaks the hold and hits the running Powerslam to win the match.
My Rating: **1/2
Match 4: WWF Tag Team Championship Match - The Nasty Boys def. The Hart Foundation (c) (12:10)
I know that Bret was about to get his singles push, but at the time I would’ve been like “how tf did The Nasty Boys win?” Like, the Hart Foundation looked so much better by comparison in this match. The match is decent though, so I can’t give it too much shit. The Nasty Boys soon find themselves in control of the match, clotheslining Bret along the top rope and then wears him down, keeping him away from the big man. Neidhart gets the tag, but the referee was distracted by Knobbs, so they drag Bret away. They whip him into the corner and Sags whips Knobbs into the corner, which Bret moves out of the way of and clotheslines Sags to the mat. Now Bret makes the tag in view of the referee and Neidhart. Neidhart turns the tide for his team. He body slams both men before picking Sags up and tossing him into his own partner. Bret and Neidhart go for the Hart Attack, but Neidhart goes to chase Sags around the ring. In a genuine 3 stooges spot, Bret whips Knobbs off the ropes, Bret ducks and at the same time Knobbs runs over him, Sags gets in the 2 partners collide with each other. The Foundation hit Knobbs with the Hart Attack and looks like they have the match won, but the referee is busy trying to get Bret out of the ring that he doesn’t see Jimmy Hart throw Sags his megaphone and Sags hits Neidhart in the back of the head with it. Knobbs covers Neidhart and we have new Tag Champs. So now Bret can go on to do bigger and better things.
My Rating: ***1/4
Match 5: Blindfold Match - Jake Roberts def. Rick Martel (8:34)
I’ll give credit to the 2 men in the match, I think that they did the very best they could with a stipulation like this. Really thought this was the best match they could possibly have in this situation. But it still sucks. I wasn’t a fan of the Marco Polo match. I did like that Roberts used the crowd to help find Martel. Whenever he would point at Martel, the crowd would cheer, telling him to go in the direction he’s pointing. Martel eventually finds the bag with Damien inside and backs off immediately, freaking out, I did like that. But other than those 2 things, I thought this was stupid. Jake eventually hits the DDT to win the match. Let’s move on.
My Rating: *
Match 6: The Undertaker def. Jimmy Snuka (4:20)
Every good story has to start somewhere. The Undertaker’s first WrestleMania marks Undertaker’s first victim of the streak. Kinda crazy how this match has become history with hindsight. Really, this match is about building up Taker as an unstoppable monster. This man beat on Snuka for the full match. This is quite literally a squash match. Snuka gets a few bodyshots in, and a headbutt, but it has no effect on The Deadman. Snuka springboards off the ropes and Undertaker catches him, and puts him in a Tombstone position, dropping Snuka to win the match and his first match at WrestleMania.
My Rating: **1/2
Match 7: Career Ending Match - Ultimate Warrior def. Randy Savage (20:48)
Wow, this is storytelling at is finest. This is one of those matches that remind me of why I’m a pro wrestling fan. An amazing match and an amazing moment after the match. Now I debated on whether or not this match deserved a 5 star rating, and I don’t think it did. And I’ll explain why. As far the match goes, this was a battle of brains vs brawns. Warrior may had the power but Savage was working smart and had Sherri on the outside to help him. So Warrior was at the disadvantage. Warrior overpowered Savage and Savage realizes pretty quickly, he has to be smart about this. Sherri accidentally hits Savage in the head with her heel, but Warrior makes the mistake of trying to chase Sherri instead of pinning Savage. And when Warrior makes it back in the ring, Savage drops Warrior on the top rope, hangs him up by leaping over the ropes. He body slams Warrior and then proceeds to drop 5 elbows on him from the top rope in succession. This is where my problems with the match come in. I thought 5 elbows was too much. Because Warrior still kicks out after that. 2? Fine. 3? More annoying but I’ll take it. But 5?! Macho Man hit his finisher 5 times and still lost? What’s Warrior’s overall in this game because that’s crazy. But to be fair, they did sell the insanity of it happening. And it’s not like it was the usual way Warrior kicks out, he barely gets his shoulder up and Savage sells it beautifully with his face. Warrior slowly begins to get up and lays Savage out with clothesline after clothesline. He press slams him and hits the big splash. 1, 2… Savage kicks out now! Warrior looks to the referee like “what?” and then looks to the sky talking to his “warriors” or something. I thought that was goofy. Warrior steps onto the apron and Savage knocks him off the apron. Sherri drapes Warrior’s throat over the guardrail and Savage leaps off with an elbow to drop Warrior’s throat on it, but Warrior dodges and Savage hits the guardrail instead! Warrior tosses Savage back in the ring, gives his 3 shoulder tackles and places a foot on Savage’s chest to win the match. Despite my grievences, this was an amazing match. Definitely Warrior’s best match of his whole career!
My Rating: ****3/4
So after the match is over, Warrior leaves. Sherri begins to attack Savage, literally kicking the man while he’s down. The man just lost his career. But he would have a savior in the form of Elizabeth, who watched the match from the crowd. She goes over the rail and runs to the ring. She pulls Sherri off Savage and throws her out, then tries to help Savage up, who tries to reject her help at first, not knowing its her. He gets back up and nearly strikes her. He sees Elizabeth and is like “what are you doing here?” He sees Sherri on the outside screaming at him and he soon realizes what happened. And he embraces Elizabeth in the ring, the crowd goes wild. For my money, the best babyface turn of all time. He holds the ropes open for Elizabeth and lets her leave before he stands in the ring and takes a moment to drink it all in. We know now that this wasn’t Savage’s retirement match. (If you know what his actual last match was, you might wish it was) But I heard that Savage actually planned on this being his retirement match. It wasn’t just a gimmick. So it really makes the moment more special as he looks out at the crowd and says “goodbye.”
Match 8: Koji Kitao & Genichiro Tenryu def. Demolition (4:44)
No longer the Ax and the Smasher. Now it was just the Smasher and the Crusher. Yeah, Demolition was pretty much done at this point. Crazy to think that Tenryu has a Mania Match under his belt, even if it was a pretty shitty one. Yeah, I didn’t like this. The crowd was pretty much burnt out from the last match. Demolition isolated Kitao from his corner, but Kitao reaches Tenryu, but he only gets a few shots in before Demolition beat up him too. Demolition go for their backbreaker/elbow drop finish, but Kitao pushes Crush off the top rope and Tenryu puts Smash away with a Tiger Bomb. Not a good display of the japanese talents.
My Rating: *1/2
Match 9: Intercontinental Championship Match - Big Boss Man def. Mr. Perfect (c) via DQ (10:47)
This match was okay, but I know it could’ve been better. Boss Man was actually a decent wrestler at this point and Mr. Perfect, well he’s Perfect isn’t he. This man wrestled a classic with Bret Hart with a broken back after all. Boss Man turned the match into a brawl. And Perfect sells all of Boss Man’s punches and shots like crazy. Boss Man swings Perfect by his hair early in the match. Boss Man just overwhelms Perfect at first. But Perfect takes control of the match, looks like he’s targeting Boss Man’s neck. But Boss Man starts fighting back sooner than later. He throws Perfect into one of the ring posts by his hair. Boss Man however makes the mistake of going after Bobby Heenan, not focusing enough on Perfect, who throws Boss Man into the ring steps from behind. Heenan takes the opportunity to give Boss Man a few stomps, but who comes to the ring? None other than Andre the Giant, looking larger than ever. He grabs the Intercontinental Title, and they take a long time just to get to this spot. Heenan argues with the referee over Andre even being there. Perfect goes over to Andre, who hits Perfect in the head with the title. But Boss Man is down too, so the referee definitely should’ve known Andre did something there. Boss Man is the first man to recover and goes to finish Perfect, but Haku and The Barbarian run down, attack Boss Man and cause the DQ finish. Andre helps Boss Man fight off the two attackers while Perfect and Heenan retreat with the IC Title. Boss Man celebrates when they announce him as the winner like an idiot.
My Rating: **3/4
Match 10: Earthquake def. Greg Valentine (3:14)
As you can expect from the time, there wasn’t a whole lot to this match. I did like how they tried to make Greg look like a tough man. Earthquake is mainly the one in control of the match, but Valentine lays into him with chops and elbows to the head that actually staggers the big guy. Jimmy Hart distracts Valentine, who gets chopped and thrown to the mat and then Earthquake takes a run and just sits on this man’s chest to beat him.
My Rating: *1/2
Match 11: The Legion of Doom def. Power & Glory (0:59)
Quick, simple match. Power and Glory jump LOD at the start and they just fight up to the point when Animal picks Paul Roma up on his shoulders and Hawk jumps off the top rope with a clothesline. LOD squashes Power and Glory. Let’s move on.
Match 12: Virgil def. Ted DiBiase via countout (7:41)
Roddy Piper comes down to the ring on crutches and is gonna be in the corner of Virgil. This match was nowhere near as good as the match they had at SummerSlam later that year. The match starts out okay, Virgil jukes and jives, laying DiBiase out on his ass a whole lot. But soon, DiBiase turns the match around and starts wearing down Virgil, it’s ahhh boring. DiBiase sends Virgil outside wearing Piper is seated. DiBiase tosses Virgil back in and pushes Piper over. DiBiase gets back in the ring. Virgil reverses an irish whip and Piper pulls the top rope down with one of his crutches, causing DiBiase to fly over the ropes. DiBiase now has his focus on Piper and is out for so long that he gets counted out so Virgil is declared the winner. But he doesn’t look like a winner as DiBiase gets back in and puts Virgil in the Million Dollar Dream as Virgil goes to check on Piper. Piper gets in the ring to help his friend, but doesn’t see Sherri come down. She jumps Piper from behind and the two begin ganging on Piper. DiBiase attacks Piper’s knee with his crutch until Virgil gets back up and chases them off. Virgil won the match, but not the war.
My Rating: **1/4
Match 13: The Mountie def. Tito Santana (1:21)
Now probably because they realized they were running out of time, I bet this match got cut short. To sum it up, Tito beats up the Mountie, Jimmy Hart hands The Mountie his stun gun, Hart distracts the referee so Mountie can taze Tito. Mountie covers him and wins. Collect your paychecks boys.
Main Event: WWF Championship Match - Hulk Hogan def. Sgt. Slaughter (c) (20:26)
So you guys may be surprised to hear this match wasn’t as bad as it sounds. But it's not good either. Certainly not good enough for 20 minutes. I kid you not though guys. The first 10 minutes of the match is Hogan beating the shit out of Slaughter. Think of SummerSlam 2014 when Brock whooped Cena's ass the whole. I thought that's where this was going. The first 10 minutes are just that one sided. Only when Hogan decides to go to the top rope does Slaughter start come back. He uses a chair twice in full view of the referee, but the ref was feeling lenient, which I wouldn't wanna end WrestleMania like that either. The match starts to get dumb in the last 10 minutes. Because during this time, Slaughter starts working Hogan's back, which isn’t so dumb, but he puts Hogan in the Boston Crab, right next to the ropes. All Hogan has to do to escape is touch the rope with is right in front of his face. Here's where I facepalmed. Then it gets even dumber because Slaughter is pinning Hogan, and Gen. Adnan decides now is the perfect time to get on the apron and argue with the referee. Meanwhile Slaughter has Hogan down for like a 20 count. Even larger facepalm. Adnan does it again, probably mistimed it, so Slaughter can go back out, grab a chair and bust Hogan open with it. Slaughter punches at that wound and puts Hogan in the Camel Clutch. He eventually lets go, thinking Hogan is out, he goes out and grabs the Iranian flag and lays it over Hogan as he pins him. Hogan kicks out, rips the flag in half. Does his whole spiel. Big boot, leg drop. It's over. Hogan wins as literally 95% of people probably saw coming.
My Rating: **1/2
Cagematch Rating: 6.13
My Rating: 7.5/10
An odd WrestleMania to rate. Cause there are some points at this show which are really great. Savage and Warrior plus the post match moment specifically. From match 1 to match 7, with the exception of the blindfold match, the show was enjoyable. After that it just started to drag. But definitely one of the best WrestleManias out of the first 10.