WWE Champion: John Bradshaw Layfield
WWE United States Champion: Carlito Caribbean Cool
WWE Tag Team Champions: Rene Dupree & Kenzo Suzuki
WWE Cruiserweight Champion: Spike Dudley
November 18th, 2004
John Cena comes down to the ring, he says he's gonna win back the United States title, he cuts some spoken word RAP, tons of lame insults clearly gearing up for his main event push.
Backstage: Al Snow is with the tough enough contestants, Chris Nawrocki is eliminated and Show leads the remaining 5 to the ring. Al Snow announces a capture the flag contest. You have 30 seconds to get past two wrestlers and grab the flag which is on the other side of the ring.......AND THEY WILL BE FACING...........................THE FUCKING BASHAM BROTHERS! UGH! You can't punch, grab, kick. LAME! Long segment less long, THEY ALL FAIL BECAUSE THIS IS STUPID AND HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WRESTLING OUTSIDE WHEN WRESTLERS ARE DOING THAT LEAP OF FAITH HOT TAG SPOT! So maybe this does have a purpose
Backstage: RVD and the debuting Michaelle McCool are doing yoga stretches when Rey comes in and joins in. They make fun of Kenzo and Rene.
Backstage: Carlito and Jesus walk into Theodore Long's office, Carlito has his arm in a sling, he claims he was injured at Survivor Series and says the match should be postponed 6 weeks, T Long refuses so Carlito busts out the doctors note, but Long says he doesn't care. And says if he refuses he will be stripped of the title.
Heidenreich (w/Paul Heyman) vs. Charlie Haas (w/Miss Jackie)
Broken Heidenreich beats the shit out of Haas but doesn't cover, he then crawls out of the ring and begins crying about "NOT FAILING" he ends up getting counted out. WASTE OF TIME!
Rey Mysterio & Rob Van Dam vs. Rene Dupree & Kenzo Suzuki (w/Hiroko)
Oh look, the tag champs are still alive. This is cool it's kept around 10 minutes, RVD busts open Kenzo's nose with a legdrop cause he's RVD. Heels iso Rey who does his thing, it's a shame they dropped the knee work they started at the start of the match and went into the basic head and neck rest holds. Taz shiting on Kenzo because he played Rugby and because he doesn't believe it cause he's Japanese is AWESOME! For some reason, Cole says Smackdown dominated at Survivor Series which LOOOOL! Not one of their matches even touched the main event. RVD has his usual hot tag, he either connects stiffly with kicks or doesn't connect at all. Shit is hilarious, Rey hits Kenzo with the 619 and RVD finishes it off with the Frog Splash for the win. **1/2
Kurt Angle comes down to the ring, he says with Thanksgiving only a week away he's in a giving mood. He says to demonstrate he's come up with the "Kurt Angle Invitational" he says every week he is giving a local wrestler the opportunity to wrestle him, and he will do it to prove he is the GREATEST WRESTLER OF ALL TIME! And if he does lose, he is willing to give the winner his Olympic Gold medal. Some local comes down to the ring, Kurt asks him his name. It's Dean Visk.
Kurt Angle vs. Dean Visk
Kurt beats the shit out of the kid for 2 minutes, before hitting the Angle Slam and locking in the ankle lock for the win.
Backstage: OJ walks into JBL's locker room where JBL IS TALKING TO..........................WAIT FOR IT..........................................AMY WEBER He tells OJ he's hired her as his Image Consultant Amy says JBL's speech is up next so he should go. And remember Image is everything.
WWE Champion John Bradshaw Layfield and Orlando Jordan come down to the ring, JBL says he is on a ROLL and he is a once in a generational talent. He compares himself to Michael Jordan, and says Booker and Eddie are great but no one will remember them because they were in the same era as the JBL ERA! He says he told everyone he guaranteed victory at Survivor Series and he delivered, he says he has defeated them all, and since he has been champion the economy has gone up. And since he has been champion. NOT ONE MAJOR TERRORIST ATTACK HAS ACCRUED! I LOVE JBL. JBL calls himself the symbol of America and says he is proud to be WWE Champion. Booker T comes out, Booker says no one is trying to hear that crap, he says he never saw MJ's houseboy slip him the WWE and cheated for him. Booker challenges to a WWE title match tonight. Eddie comes out now, driving that beauty pumpkin color low rider. Eddie also has his best church pimp suit on. Eddie says he's sick and tired of listening to JBL and say he hasn't forgotten what he did to his mom and the Guererro name Eddie says it's time for him to get HIS belt back. Eddie and Booker have words about who should get the title match.............................BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT! And the Undertaker comes down to the ring. Taker signals for the WWE Championship, so JBL runs away. He leaves the ring and yells at them from the ramp that they don't get it so he has to tell them in Spanish, Hip-Hop, and Monster "NONE OF YOU ARE EVER GETTING A TITLE MATCH" GM Theodore Long comes out now, he says as GM he agrees with JBL, that none of them are getting singles matches, cause JBL will be facing all 3 of them for the WWE Championship at Armageddon.
Al Snow gives the Tough Enough contestants 30 seconds to talk about why they should stay. WORDS!
FUCK ALL THAT JOY MAKES HER SMACKDOWN DEBUT! She's tending to Carlito's hurt shoulder. She tries to loosen it up, but he says she's terrible and forces her to leave. Carlito says that THUG is not taking his title.
Jesus tries to jump Cena in the ring, but it backfires and Cena beats the shit out of him. Carlito who has his arm all bandaged up tries to leave, but Cena beats him up around ringside. Jesus recovers and grabs a chair, but Cena blocks it and fucks him up some more. Cena then wraps Carlito's injured arm around the ring post and hits it with the chair. He rolls Carlito into the ring and the bell rings.
WWE United States Championship: Carlito Caribbean Cool (w/Jesus) vs. John Cena
Cena picks him up and hits the FU for the win. LOL!
After the match; JESUS ATTACKS THE KIDNEY THAT WAS STABBED BUT HAS NO SCARING! He wraps his fist with the chain and punches it. Carlito and Jesus bail, as Cena is stretchered out.
WWE World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Shelton Benjamin
WWE World Tag Team Champions: William Regal & Eugene
WWE Women's Champion: Trish Stratus
WWE Monday Night RAW Episode 600
November 22nd, 2004
Buffalo, New York
FIST TIME WATCHING!!!!!!
Chris Benoit comes out onto the stage, he says tonight he's in charge. Benoit says he didn't know what to expect when he turned up today, but after all the politicking, ass-kissing tried to get their way. He put a piece of paper on his door and anyone that wanted a match just wrote it down and got their match. So, TONIGHT! it is Maven vs. Gene Snitsky, Batista vs. Chris Jericho, Lita vs. Trish vs. Molly for the Woman's title. Benoit says Coachman, wanted a real match with JR and will get it. Benoit point's out the cage above the ring. He says after all the interference last week, there will be no excuses when he faces Triple H for the WORLD TITLE
Gene Snitsky vs. Maven
Snitsky although his character is amazing, he's still green and basic in the ring, And Maven has never been good. They kinda just do stuff, Snitsky applies this god awful looking half Boston Crab, they both take turns targetting one another's legs and they both tag turns not selling it. Shit is all filler. Snitsky hits the Pumphandle Side Slam for the win. *1/2
Backstage: Evolution are talking, Hunter is pissed and says this is CRAP! Flair tries to calm him down, he says he survived last week. Batista says he has his back, Hunter says just like last week? he says he won't calm down. Hunter says he didn't have his back at Survivor Series too, and very slowly explained last week, and again he didn't have his back. Triple H says he made this group so he wouldn't have to jump through hoops and Batista tells him to calm down. Batista goes to leave but Triple H pulls him back, he asks where he's going, and Batista says he has a match with Jericho, Hunter then says that he's got $100 that he'll lose that one too. Flair calms Batista down.
In the ring, Stacy Keibler comes out to plug the ECW "Rise and Falls" DVD when Simon Dean come out. He starts plugging his own DVD. He hits on Stacy so she insults him, and he tries to intimidate her. Hurricane runs out to save, but Simon low blows him and beats the shit out of him until Rosey makes the save.
Backstage: Candice is talking to some THOT (Malina) She gossips about Evolution's issues when Batista barges out of a room. Flair tries to calm him down. Flair tells Batista that Triple H didn't mean it, but Batista says they both know that's not true, and if he thinks he can talk to him like that, he's dead wrong.
Chris Jericho vs. Batista (w/Ric Flair)
This is a good time, Batista does all his monster power offense and Jericho bumps his ass off for all of it. Jericho busts out all his 200 babyface dives and highflying offense to get Batista off his feet. Jericho counters the Batista Bomb into a roll-up for two, Flair gets on the apron for the distraction allowing Batista to hit the spinebuster. Batista then places Jericho upside down in the corner and begins choking him from the floor for the DQ. After the match; Batista kills Jericho from behind with the KNOCKOUT LARIAT! **1/2
Backstage: Batista walks past Triple H who sarcastically claps and asks if Batista wants to give him his $100 now or later, Batista says he's not in the mood, and he walked out while Jericho is being carried out. Hunter says the bottom line is he told him to win, and he didn't do that. Flair tries to break it up, but Hunter yells to stop interrupting him. He says Batista blew it, and he's got a million dollar body and a ten cent brain. He says he needs someone he can rely on, and if that's not Batista, he should just get out, so Batista yells "SCREW YOU!" and walks off. Hunter tells Flair to go talk sense into him, and Flair says he will, but with all due respect, he needs to back off of Batista.
Backstage: Todd Grisham interviews Edge, he shows footage of Edge beating up Christian last week. Edge says he's taking the lone wolf approach, he's no longer a tag team wrestler. And should be getting shots at the World title, but oh no, Benoit gave it to himself. He says he deserves the match and takes the mic to ask random people if they agree. He asks Maria and Christy if they think he deserves the title match, they say NO! A random worker says NO! And says he voted for Shawn Michaels at Taboo Tuesday. Edge shoves him into a wall Chris Benoit pulls him off. He says if he has a problem with how he's running the show tonight, he should do something about it, and Edge walks off.
Coachman comes out for his match, by Benoit appears on the tron. Benoit says there has been another miscommunication when he wrote down JR, he thought JR stood for JUST RHYNO!
Coachman vs. Rhyno
WWE Woman's Championship: Lita vs. Molly Holly vs. Trish Stratus
Trish and Molly team up early, but Lita fights them off. I love that all of Lita' offense towards Trish is directed to the face and even pulls some dickish moves like pulling the face mask and sending it back into Trish's nose. Trish and Molly go back to double team but it ends when Trish tries to pull a face one with a roll-up for two. Trish then blames the face protector and says she couldn't see I love heel, Trish. Lita makes a comeback on the both of them, she hits Molly with the snap DDT but Trish pulls her to the floor and covers Molly for the win. **1/2
After the match; As Trish is celebrating Lita locks her in the rear naked choke.
Backstage: Batista is getting his arm iced up, Flair warns him not to make the mistake that Orton made, because this is a good unit, and everyone has bad days growing up in this business, but he's got a future. He says he's the handpicked successor of Triple H when he steps down to be the next Champion, but Batista asks at what price, and if he has to get treated like dirt, like some muscle-headed idiot by Triple H, it's not worth it, and he's tired of waiting. Flair yells that tired is nothing, and he's been tired for 32 years, but he's still here. He says they owe Triple H, and he should apologize and calm down. Batista says he's gotta be kidding him, and Flair says not to make a mistake he'll regret. Batista says he'll think about it, but if he does something about it tonight, he WON'T regret it.
Shelton Benjamin backstory video airs.
Shelton Benjamin, William Regal & Eugene vs. Christian & La Resistance (w/Tyson Tomko)
This is mostly La Resistance isolating Eugene, so fuck everything. Christian barely gets in and Shelton only tags in to get the hot tag. He cleans house and the match breaks down. He hits Conway with the T-Bone Suplex for the win. FUCK THIS! After the match; Eugene brings some bum ass kids in the ring to dance and hug.
Muhammad Hassan cuts a promo on airports and being stopped during travels. GIVE US RESPECT!
The Steel Cage is being lowered around the ring.
Chris Benoit comes out for the match, they play Triple H's music but he doesn't come out. The camera goes backstage, with Flair yelling at Batista that he's lost his mind. Triple H is shown laid out on the floor. Flair yells at the doctors. Chris Benoit comes over and the Doctors say he's "unconscious and can't compete" Flair yells at Benoit if he touches him, he will have a lawsuit. Edge comes over and asks how it feels to be robbed of a title match like he was, and says he would have beaten Triple H, but Benoit would have failed. Benoit says he's got a lot of pent-up aggression, so he orders Edge to take Triple H's place in the cage match RIGHT NOW!
Steel Cage Match: Chris Benoit vs. Edge
OH MAN! IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS! They get right to it with punches, chops, forearms, and boots to the face. Edge takes a page out of Hunter's playbook and sends Benoit into the turnbuckles hard and Benoit does his awesome hard bump. Edge targets the back, in between trying to escape, and Benoit does the same. They start utilizing the cage now with Benoit hitting a baseball sliding sending Edge's whole upperbody into the cage. During the break, Edge sent Benoit into the cage beam busting him open. This is super violent, so man stiff punches, straight elbows, and headbutts. Edge goes to escape but Benoit takes out the legs and Edge takes a fantastic bump off the top turnbuckle and stumbles into 5 rolling German's from Benoit. Benoit begins to climb out, but Edge meets him at the top. SO BENOIT RAPIDLY HEADBUTTS EDGE TO THE MAT! He follows up with the Diving Headbutt for two. Benoit tries to lock in the Crossface, but Edge rolls to the cage so Benoit begins pounding at his face. FUCK YEAH! Edge gets his own back and now he baseball slides Benoit's ribs into the cage. He continues to slam and punch at Benoit who is sandwiched between the cage mesh and the ropes, but out of desperation, Benoit slams the door into Edge's head. The match ends when Benoit was turning to open the door as Edge ran to Spear him, and he got him right in the side of the ribs, forcing Benoit to fall out the door and hits the floor for the win. GOOD SHIT! WOW! I love this pairing. ***3/4
Backstage: Batista is watching on and Flair asks Batista if he's lost his mind, Hunter is back on his feet. Batista says good cause he's going out to the ring and is CALLING HIS ASS OUT! And Flair had better decide whose side he's on.
Batista is in the ring, he says he's not after Triple H's title tonight he's after him. Triple H comes stumbling out, as Flair tries to stop him along with a doctor. He gets a mic and gets in Batista's face, and says he only has one thing to say to him, and that is.....................................................................Hunter starts laughing, and says "well done, man", and they all hug.EVOLUTION IS A MYSTERY! Triple H says he loves it when a plan works, he hands the doc $100 and says it was well worth the money. Hunter goes over his plan and says Batista's performance tonight deserves an award, and they high five. And says in all seriousness, he still should have beaten Jericho Hunter says he's not one to brag or rub it in all their faces but ladies...........Randy Orton comes out onto the stage, he says he pulled a good one. Orton says he's the GM next week. Triple H mocks him about not being able to compete for the World Title. Orton says he's gonna give him 2 options. The first choice is Triple H vs. Orton and if Orton wins, he can challenge for the belt again. Hunter says nobody wants to see that and asks the crowd. They cheer, so he says in that case, it's a definite NO! Orton says in that case, Orton will face everyone behind door number two. The entire locker room comes out, AND ORTON SAYS IT'S A BATTLE ROYAL FOR THE BELT NEXT WEEK!
WWE Champion: John Bradshaw Layfield
WWE United States Champion: John Cena
WWE Tag Team Champions: Rene Dupree & Kenzo Suzuki
WWE Cruiserweight Champion: Spike Dudley
November 25th, 2004
Rochester, New York
Tonight: Eddie/Booker vs. JBL/OJ
JOY IS SETTING UP THE THANKSGIVING TABLE OF FOOD FOR THE BIG SHOW!
Torrie Willson comes down to the ring to introduce the first match.
Rey Mysterio vs. Rene Dupree (w/FiFi)
Rene is sporting a real serious black eye, and Taz claims he had a run in with FiFi This might be my favorite matchup of theirs so far, it's kept short and they right to it. Rey wants to do all his flying around, but Rene puts a stop to that early dropkicking him out of mid-air. Rene is still super average and doesn't take Rey serious so he taunts way too much. Rey does Rey things during his comeback, they exchange moves in the ring until Rey hits the 619 and drops the dime for the win. **1/2
Backstage: Kenzo is drooling at the sight at Torrie Willson when Hiro tries to talk to him, but all he does it look at the TV at Torrie.
Tough Enough recap fuckery challenge from last week.
Al Snow and the Tough Enough cast come down to the ring, Snow claims that RYBAK broke his ribs in last weeks challenge he asks him if he wants to quit. He says NO! Daniel Rodimer is eliminated. Al Snow says this week challenge is an arm wrestling competition. Puder vs. Miz, and Justice vs. Rybak. Puder wins his match, and Rybak wins his so it's Puder vs. Rybak in the finals.......................................DA BIG GUY! Daniel Puder wins.
Backstage: Eddie and Booker are talking, Booker says he has unfinished business and asks Eddie if he's ready, Eddie says he has a history with JBL and is ready to tear into him. Amy comes in, she introduces herself to them. Eddie asks what she whats, she says as a team they could be great, it's just a shame they're gonna be opponents at Armageddon. Booker claims he's gonna win, but so does Eddie. Amy leaves and they argue over who will win and who deserves the match. Eddie says Booker has never won the big one here. Booker says when he wins and if he loses he won't go blaming it on his "Family" Amy comes back and says don't forget about the Undertaker.
Tonight: A Big Show's Thanksgiving
At ringside Cole tells us after last weeks assault, Cena was pissing blood backstage.
Backstage: Carlito and Jesus cut a promo, Carlito says Cena is to blame for all of this. He says last week he brutally attacked him, and he got what he deserved. And thanks to Jesus the pain he has to go through is nothing compared to what Cena's going through. Carlito says Cena may have stolen his title, but he still has his chain. Carlito gives Jesus the chain as a token of gratitude for last weeks attack. Jesus says he did to Cena what Cena would have done to him, and he proved what happens when you mess with him and his compadre Carlito. Jesus says he just got his "WRESTLING LICENCE" And if Cena wants to do this again, he just has to name the time or place.
Backstage: RVD and Rey are talking, RVD says he excited for their title match at Armageddon. RVD speaks Spanish as they make fun of breaking Kenzo's nose with the move they call the 4:20
Torrie Willson is back for ring introductions.
Rob Van Dam vs. Kenzo Suzuki (w/Hiroko)
Terrible, these two are the worse.
Torrie comes into the ring, to announce the winner, Hiroko slaps her so Torrie attacks her. Kenzo grabs Torrie from behind and makes sexual advancements towards her so RVD cockblocks and throws him out of the ring.
The ring is set up of tables of food, Joy is in the ring along with Josh Mathews. The Big Show comes out, he says this is his favorite holiday and wanted to spend it with you fans. He talks about his childhood and shit, this goes on way too long. Cole, Taz, ring crew, Tony Chimmel all come into the ring for food and shit, when Luther Reigns comes out. Luther talks about her trash ass background too, HOLY SHIT! I HATE THIS SHOW! Luther comes down and forces Joy to serve him food, it ends up in a food fight cause yeah.
Kurt Angle comes down to the ring with two armed police officers (one of them who is the spitting image of Darren Young ), one holding a box. Kurt grabs the mic and says unlike the Big Show who lured Luther down to the ring for an ambush Kurt has the officers open the box and it's his Gold Medal. Some kid comes out, his name is Cody Steele.
The Kurt Angle Invitational: Kurt Angle vs. Cody Steele
Kurt allows the local to start on top, but Kurt escapes and beats the shit out of him. 2 minutes later, the Angle Slam and ankle lock ends it.
The Tough Enough contestants come out onto the stage and talk about what they are thankfully about.
Backstage: Paul Heyman cuts a promo on Heidenreich actions last week
Dawn Marie comes out dressed as an Indian, and Jackie is dressed as a pilgrim.
Dawn Marie vs. Miss Jackie
CATFIGHT and shit. Ref stops the match for no reason, like LEGIT all they have been doing is rolling around and he asks for the match to be stopped. SMH! Haas comes out to pull them apart and shit. YAWN!
Booker T & Eddie Guererro vs. John Bradshaw Layfield & Orlando Jordan
This gets 5 or 6 minutes, Eddie/JBL interactions rules, as usual, oh I've missed that JBL/Booker is still solid. OJ is just useless. Heels isolate Booker it's meh, and kept short, Eddie hot tag is a ton of fun. He cleans house and the match breaks down, with everyone in. Eddie ducks the Clothesline from hell and Booker catches JBL with the axe kick. OJ and Booker fight on the floor, when GOD DAMMIT NO! A MAN IN A REY MASK NAILS BOOKER WITH A RIGHT HAND.................IT'S DANNY BASHAM! Eddie is unaware when Doug punches Eddie off the top and JBL covers for the win. FUCK NO! **
After the match; The lights go out, and Taker is in the ring. He hits OJ with a Chokeslam and Tombestones JBL.
WWE World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Shelton Benjamin
WWE World Tag Team Champions: William Regal & Eugene
WWE Women's Champion: Trish Stratus
WWE Monday Night RAW
November 29th, 2004
FIRST TIME WATCHING!!!!!
The entire RAW roster minus GM for the night Randy Orton and Triple H are in the ring, Vince McMahon then comes onto the stage. He says this World Title battle royal isn't gonna happen, cause anyone can win a battle royal. "I MEAN C'MON! What if, Steven Richards was to win and be World Champion" lmao Vince says we will be getting the World Title match, just the winner if this battle royal will go on to face Triple H in the main event TONIGHT!
#1 Contender's Battle Royal
Half the wrestlers team up and throw Viscera out, Tajiri then throws his tag partner Rhyno out Tomko is out next after Shelton suplexes him out. The fucking camera keeps panning away from Regal/Benoit/Flair awesomeness. Maven dropkicks Sylvan out, and from behind Eugene throws Maven out. During the break; Coach eliminates himself when he runs from Benoit's chops. Snitsky throws Regal out and Rosey out, as Batista clotheslines The Hurricane out. Snitsky and Batista STAREDOWN! But the jobbers break it up and get BOOOOOO'ED for doing so. Batista starts wrecking shit and eliminates, Eugene, Tajiri, Christian, Val................BUT OH SHIT! HE THROWS FLAIR OUT TOO! Coming back from break, Jericho dropkicks Snitsky to the floor. t's down to Benoit, Jericho, Batista, Edge, Shelton, AND MOTHERFUCKING STEVIE RICHARDS! Richards challenges them all so Jericho, Benoit, and Shelton jump him and throw him out. Shelton tees off on Edge in the corner while Jericho and Benoit do that "Hold Batista up against the ropes" spot. Edge tries to throw Shelton over but he lands on his feet onto the apron, so Edge spears him to the floor. Edge/Benoit pair off and so does Jericho/Batista Batista catches Jericho in a crossbody attempt, he then runs and throws Jericho to the floor. Edge spears Batista, but from behind Benoit German suplex him. Batista hoists Benoit up like he did to Jericho, but from behind Edge dropkicks Batista who falls over the top and to the floor, as Benoit hangs on. We're down to Benoit & Edge They have a pretty good apron battle, and both men knock each other to the floor with both men's feet hitting at the same time.
After the break, the refs argue and different angles are shown.
Backstage: refs give their opinions to Orton, they leave and McMahon comes in, Orton asks for his opinion and Vince says it doesn't matter he's the GM tonight. Edge pleads to Vince about deserving this match, Vince says he agrees with him but in the end, it's not his opinion that matters, and leaves. Edge tells Orton he knows they've had problems, but he deserves this, and after he beats Triple H, he'll give Orton a title shot. Orton says he'll think about it, and Edge yells that there's nothing to think about, and Orton again says he'll think about it and leaves.
Backstage: Maven and Shelton are talking, Maven says he's had 2 chances at being the World Champion in 3 weeks and NOTHING! Eugene comes in and asks for help putting his belt on. Maven yells at him for throwing him out and now wanting help. He says he's been busting his ass for 3 years around here, but Eugene just walks in and probably can't even spell the word title. Shelton tries to calm him down and Regal comes over. He says it was every man for himself, and they'd all have done the same thing and asks if they have a problem. Maven sits back down and says NOTHING!
Backstage: Orton is walking when Candice Michelle introduces herself, she asks him if her dress is too interoperate and is showing too much Cleavage. Orton says it's not. Benoit comes up and says they need to talk. He yells at Orton that they won at Survivor Series, yet they keep getting shafted over and over again. Orton says he's right and is gonna put an end to all this controversy.
Randy Orton comes onto the stage, he says La Resistance has used their rematch clause at a shot for their tag team titles. Orton says JR WON'T be wrestling tonight. It will be Jerry Lawler celebrating his birthday vs. Ric Flair in a LEGENDS MATCH Orton says Edge and Benoit both have valid points and he could book them in one on one matches, but that still gives Triple H a 50% chance so TONIGHT! IT WILL BE EDGE vs. BENOIT vs. Triple H for the World Championship.
Lawler leaves to get ready for his match, so Coach takes his place.
Lita & Victoria vs. Trish Stratus & Molly Holly
Decent woman's match outside Victoria still being terrible, Lita pins Trish after the snapDDT.
Bum ass Baltimore Ravens are in the crowd.
Muhammad Hassan video package. OH NOZ HE'S COMING
Ric Flair vs. Jerry "THE KING" Lawler
It's sad that these two at their age is still better than 80% of the RAW and Smackdown roster. They have a good feeling out process to start, Lawler mocks and toys with Flair, so Flair lights his ass up with chops. Now Lawler takes it seriously with jabs. Flair half ass works on the knee, like a couple of kicks at it, in between chops. Flairs CHOPS LAWLER IN THE FACE! Which pisses him off, and down comes the straps. Lawler makes his comeback, he connects with a first drop but gets cocky and hits it a 2nd time, but on the one hurts the knee. Flair chop blocks the knee and locks in the Figure Four, behind the refs back he grabs the ropes and Lawler is forced to tap. FUCKIT! *** God bless the greats.
Flair/Lawler FEUD plz
Backstage: Randy Orton is with Malina, he says he's hired her to be a new Diva on RAW. She says if there's anything she can do to return the favor, let her know. Maria comes in, and Orton says he has an idea for them, to give back to the fans, and says to meet him in the ring.
WrestleMania Recall: 2004 "BENOIT"
Shelton Benjamin upbringing video.
Randy Orton is in the ring with Maria, Candice, and Melina. Orton says as acting GM he has to give the fans the hottest show, and what is a hot show without hot women. Orton says 3 women are nice but 5 are better so he brings out Stacy and Cristy Hemme. Orton has then take part in the first ever Raw Lingerie Fashion Show. ASS-TITTIES AND STUFF!
WWE Tag Team Championships: La Resistance vs. William Regal & Eugene
4 minutes of nothing, champs retain.
After the match; Maven runs out and throws Eugene into the steps. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
Backstage: Trish bumps into Chris Jericho, Jericho says it's funny that she's going around calling Lita the walking "KISS OF DEATH" when the walking KOD beat the walking STD Trish says still champion, and asks how long it's been since Jericho won anything notable. Jericho laughs and says he's GM next week, so it'll be Trish defending the Women's Championship against Lita.
Backstage: Flair asks Batista to give him 1 good reason why he threw him out earlier tonight, Batista says it was an accident. Flair says this might have cost Triple H the title and says they could have masterminded a plan so one of them won, and they'd lie down for Triple H. Flair says he would, and Batista doesn't say anything. Flair asks if he would, and Triple H comes in. He talks about how unfair it is, and Flair says he's got his back. Hunter looks at Batista waiting, and Batista finally says he's got his back too and pats him on the arm. Hunter and Flair walk off, and Batista stays there glaring. OH SHIT!
RAW NEXT WEEK IN CHARLOTTE, NORTH CAROLINA
Triple Threat Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Edge vs. Chris Benoit vs. Triple H
Before the bell, Benoit attacks Edge and they fight as Triple H watches on from the corner sarcastically clapping and shit Triple H knocks Edge off the apron and goes right to work sending Benoit hard chest first into the turnbuckles who does his amazing corner bump. Benoit makes a brief comeback, but Edge comes in ending that. They briefly team up, until Edge now turns on Hunter. Benoit then takes the fight to both of them and hits them both with a double suicide dive to the floor. Back from break, Edge and Benoit are going at it in the ring, with Hunter on the floor. Benoit vs. Edge is clearly an amazing match which I wish would have gone on longer. Hunter sneaks back in but gets caught in the Crossface. But, Batista and Flair run down. Flair distracts the ref as Batista drags Benoit to the floor and hits the KO LARIAT! Benoit is out so we get Hunter/Edge, it's not bad but they don't have the best chemistry together. They counter one another finishers, and thankfully Benoit is back wrecking and suplexing both men around. He suplexes Edge onto Hunter face taking him out of the ring, Benoit then locks in the Sharpshooter on Edge, on the floor Huter shoves Orton who has been at ringside since kicking Evolution to the back into the ringpost and breaks up the hold. Back in the ring, Benoit backdrops Hunter to the floor, the ref gets bumped so Hunter grabs a chair. He brings it into the ring, but Orton grabs it and nails Triple H with it sending him into the first row of the crowd. In the ring, Edge goes for the spear but Benoit grabs the arm and locks in a modified crossface. Edge fights, as another ref runs down. Edge rolls it onto his back as the ref counts to three at the same time Edge taps and the original refs spots that. ***1/4
After the match; refs argue who won. 1 ref awards Edge the title, while one signals Benoit. WHO DA CHAMPION!?!?!?! Hunter slowly awakens and yells no.