Before things officially go live, there is one image shown on the screen, and that is the image of the Anarchy graphic with writing below it, seemingly the tagline for the brand.
"UWF Anarchy. Not...for the faint of heart."
The IZOD Center is practically shaking from the raucous ovation of the fired up New Jersey crowd as each and every one of them came to see what UWF can bring to East Rutherford and how hard they can bring it. Suddenly their cries of excitement and anticipation are overpowered as a new theme begins to play.
[video=youtube;un9UR2SGiKc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=un9UR2SGiKc[/video]
"Violent Revolution" by Kreator begins to play as the official theme song of Wednesday Night Anarchy, plays over the PA system as the pyrotechnics go off all around the stage and the camera pans around the arena, catching all of the droves of passionate fans on film, each adorned in their respective choice of UWF memorabilia, waving around various signs such as, "That's The Bottom Line", "Best In The World", "Gore! Gore! Gore!", etc. After the camera has panned around the entire arena, things head to the commentary table where the voices of Wednesday nights are seated.
Joey Styles: Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the beginning of a new era in the Ultimate Wrestling Federation. This is Wednesday Night Anarchy and I am one-half of the commentary team that will be calling all of the hard hitting action and joining me here at the table to help call it is none other than the "Hardcore Legend" himself, Mick Foley!
Mick Foley: Trust me when I say that it's an honor to be back on commentary and a privilege to be doing so on such a momentous night alongside such a dear friend. I'm just sorry that Matt Striker had to be replaced as a result.
Joey Styles: I can't say I feel the same way, Mick, but I do agree with this being a momentous night. And what better way to kick things off than with a word from the General Manager himself?
[video=youtube;ijXQ6Lyc6Us]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijXQ6Lyc6Us[/video]
The crowd is seemingly brought to their feet in unison as the infamous sound of the breaking glass pierces the sounds that were going on in the arena and everyone cheers and waves about their signs as the General Manager of Anarchy and "Texas Rattlesnake" himself makes his way from the backstage and heads down the ramp with a purpose.
Joey Styles: Well I've only got three words for you, Mick, "Oh Hell Yeah". The General Manager is here and the roof has practically come off the IZOD Center!
Mick Foley: I'm loving this already!
Stone Cold quickly makes his way down the ramp as he climbs onto the apron and steps through the ropes, entering the ring.
Upon entering the ring, Austin heads to the nearest turnbuckle and poses for the capacity crowd.
Stone Cold descends the turnbuckle and heads over to the far ropes, getting a microphone from the ringside official as he turns and raises the microphone, ready to address the crowd.
Stone Cold: Sounds ta' me like you approve of what ol' Stone Cold's done with the place!
The crowd goes ballistic in response, voicing their approval as loudly and passionately as they can.
Stone Cold: Oh hell yeah, it's a whole different animal we're dealin' with now, boys an' girls, and despite yer overwhelming enthusiasm, I bet yer wonderin' why exactly that is. I know because that's what ninety five percent a' the Tweets fans from around the world have sent me entail is that very question. (What?) They're sendin' letters to the Broken Skull Ranch askin' about it. (What?) They're sendin' texts ta' Stone Cold's cell phone wonderin' what the deal is. (What?) They're leavin' Stone Cold voicemails about it. (What?) Sendin' 'im e-mails. (What?) Hell, I went ta' use the restroom earlier an' the guy standin' at the urinal next ta' me asked me what gives, so for all of you and all of them, here goes nothin'.
Why rebrand In Ex Tee? Well I answer that question with another question, why the hell not? In Ex Tee is an institution that was doomed ta' fail from the start and that's simply because people laugh or shake their heads when they hear those three letters, it just isn't something that they take seriously. When people hear or see those letters they think of the stupid little challenges the contestants were put through like it was a reality television program. They remember that it had ta' relocate ta' Dubya Dubya E dot com because it couldn't hold solid enough ratings ta' justify remaining on television. It had the reputation of being a developmental territory with rights ta' broadcast, it suffered from the third wheel syndrome which meant, regardless a' what In Ex Tee accomplished as a brand, whether it's brand of the month or had the best feud of the month or what have you, it was always going to be looked at as unnecessary and inferior to Raw and Smackdown and a joke show that no one wanted to appear on.
Not ta' mention, I don't know if you could smell it, but In Ex Tee absolutely reeked of Jay Bee Ell, and while I thought I was content with comin' in and showin' another man how he should've done his job and how his brand is suppose ta' be run, I decided ta' do away with his creation entirely and make the Wednesday night program somethin' that I could call my own. But why Anarchy? Why not E See Dubya? Why not iMPACT? Why not Thunder or Nitro? Why not Warzone? Because none of those other brands encompass Stone Cold's vision for the product quite like Anarchy does. For those of you familiar with the See Dubya Aye, you'll remember it for being gritty and hard hitting, cutting edge and unforgiving with its brutality and not a damn bit stingy with its action. That's what I plan ta' bring you each and every week, great action that keeps you on the edge of your seats from the opening pyro to the fade ta' black and makes you hungry for more. But of course we couldn't do a rebranding without changing the roster a bit, an' that's why Stone Cold arranged for some fresh faces ta' ring in this new era.
Gone is Chris Jericho, Aye Jay Styles, and that son of a bitch Austin Aries, but I doubt you'll miss 'em too much cuz we've got the "Party Starter" Curt Hawkins, The Undertaker, Ryback, the team of Matt Hardy and Shannon Moore with Reby Sky, Beer Money, and Bully Ray. That's what Stone Cold calls a pick-up, an' I'm not talkin' about trucks. But of course...
"LOOK IN MY EYES!
...
WHAT DO YOU SEE?"
[video=youtube;oq4Lbe_Vl5w]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oq4Lbe_Vl5w&feature=player_embedded[/video]
The fans in attendance respond with a mixed reaction as "Cult of Personality" begins to play throughout the arena. CM Punk walks out from the back with a smirk on his face as he looks down the ramp at Steve Austin.
Joey Styles: What blatant disrespect! Stone Cold's out here making one hell of a presentation and CM Punk just waltzes out to ruin the whole thing!
Mick Foley: My guess is the locker room wasn't big enough to hold his ego anymore so he came out here to give it more space to grow. You can practically see the chip on his shoulder, somebody pass the salsa.
Punk arrives at the bottom of the ramp and enters the ring, raising the microphone he's holding up to his mouth as "Cult of Personality" fades out to silence.
CM Punk: All of this is very interesting, Steve, in fact the past few weeks have been very interesting when it comes to you, haven't they? At Wrestlemania ten days ago we found out that the only thing you're still any good at is running your mouth, gone are the days that you can back up your threats and stomp the proverbial mudholes and open the infamous cans, those days are over. They've been replaced by the days of now, where the old and broken down Rattlesnake slithers into a patch of tall grass that doesn't belong to him, has a scuffle with the alpha male that oversees the territory, and narrowly escapes with his head intact. At Wrestlemania it was me, the time before that it was Christian. Not to sound like another bald headed idiot with a goatee, but who's next? Who is going to be the next person to embarass you and humiliate you in this ring, or have you finally learned your lesson?
Stone Cold balls up his fist as it begins to tremble at his side.
Go ahead and hit me, Steve, use your little General Manager powers to call a referee down here and we'll sanction the official rematch and just like at Wrestlemania, I will kick your ass except this time I will maim you and cripple you and make sure that you are never able to set boot or beer can on any part of UWF property again. I understand you're emotional because you weren't quite ready to come to grips with the fact that you're a has been and your all of a sudden best pal D'Angelo Dinero decided to hit the bricks, but for once in your life think before you do something irrational, because it's a special night and I'd hate to ruin it for you. I actually wouldn't, but for decency's sake, let's pretend I have a shred of compassion for you.
The crowd is booing Punk tremendously as Austin drops his microphone and removes his shirt, inspiring cheers from the crowd. Stone Cold is ready for war as he cocks his fist back and gets ready to unload on Punk.
This is my last warning to you, Slingblade, if you put your hands on me I am going to kick your bald head into the rafters. Now back off because riling you up isn't the reason I came out here. It's proven for a nice perk but the reason I came out here and interrupted your announcements is because I have an announcement of my own. You see, following Wrestlemania I had a little chat with Vince McMahon, and he and I both agreed that if it's that easy for you to be provoked and coaxed into a physical altercation and a sanctioned match, then you are unfit to be the General Manager of not only this brand, but any brand in the company.
The crowd boos this intensely as Austin grabs Punk by the shirt collar. Punk pushes Austin off of him.
I wasn't finished yet! That's why it's important to actually listen instead of just waiting for me to stop talking so you can butt in with your two cents and slop your redneck jargon all over the English language and set professional wrestling and fans of professional wrestling back another thirty years! While you are no doubt unfit to run a brand period, that's not what we agreed upon. Vince put you in power so he's inclined to be more than a little biased, so we met halfway, which means you get to remain the General Manager, only you will no longer be running it by yourself.
The crowd boos this as well as a smile forms on Punk's face and Austin continues to stare a hole through him.
And with the ball in my court, the choice for a co-General Manager was easy. I wanted Vince to employ a man that you absolutely can't stand, someone that made your time in UCW hell, a man that I consider my friend and mentor, Mr. Paul Heyman. But unfortunately, Brock Lesnar made the decision to return to active competition and managing him was something Paul couldn't pass up, so I was left having to think about who I was going to ask Vince to give the position to.
Stone Cold cuts Punk off before he can continue.
Stone Cold: And that's where I'm gonna stop ya, kid, before you put yer foot any farther in yer mouth. The fact of the matter is Stone Cold's the General Manager, and since he's the General Manager he knows about any behind the scenes discussions that happen because I'm either part of 'em or one of the other General Managers or Vince himself, whoever it was that was involved, contact me about it. So while you stand there thinkin' ya pulled a fast one on me, think again son, Stone Cold knows all about yer little meeting with Vince. Vince told me I needed ta' reel my anger in a little bit, an' he and I agreed on what he agreed on with you, that I would be assigned a co-General Manager. Now stay with me, cuz here comes the good part.
Vince told me that you wanted Paul Heyman as the co-Gee Em, so Stone Cold made a call to the "Next Big Thing" and convinced him ta' bring his big ass back to the You Dubya Eff and naturally he did, signed a contract with Raw, and Heyman followed suit. I put the wrench in yer plan, Punk, and don't bother wastin' yer time tryna' come up with a replacement, cuz me an' Vince already picked one, but revealin' 'em now would be givin' away too much at once. Instead the co-General Manager will be revealed when I come out here later tonight and call Rhino to this ring to receive his new championship belt. Now I suggest you get outta my ring and enjoy yer night off if ya know what's good fer ya.
Stone Cold's music hits again as he heads to the nearest turnbuckle and ascends it, posing for the crowd. Punk looks up at him in disgust before exiting the ring and making his way up the ramp as Anarchy heads to its first commercial.
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COMMERCIAL ONE
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Joey Styles: Welcome back folks to Wednesday Night Anarchy! Before the break we were joined by General Manager Stone Cold Steve Austin who explained to everyone just why the change that you see around you occurred.
Mick Foley: But never one to respect another man's spotlight, C.M. Punk interrupted and after a bitter back and forth between the two, we discovered that Anarchy has been given a co-General Manager to run operations alongside Stone Cold every week. Who do you think it is, Joey?
Joey Styles: Not a clue, Mick, and that's the beauty of the unknown. What I do know is we plan on kicking off this powder keg of a program right with a singles match of epic proportions when the protege' of the "Icon" Sting, Seth Rollins, takes on the legendary "Phenom", The Undertaker.
Mick Foley: Hearing that match-up alone gives me goosebumps. Do you think the young Rollins has what it takes to give The Undertaker a run for his money, or even better, pull off the victory?
Joey Styles: Seth Rollins seems to be refocused and rejuvenated in comparison to how he's behaved in recent months, so really I think the kid's got as much of a chance as his veteran opponent.
Mick Foley: Well the great thing is we don't have to wait long at all as the beautiful Christy Hemme is standing by to introduce the competitors.
The camera pans away from the commentary table and to the ring where Christy Hemme is standing by.
DING DING!
Christy Hemme: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is the first match of the UWF Anarchy brand! Introducing first...
[video=youtube;ckTHxaZ_50A]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckTHxaZ_50A&feature=player_embedded[/video]
"Guys Like You Make Us Look Bad" by Blessthefall begins to play as Seth Rollins comes running out from the backstage, fired up and ready to compete.
Mick Foley: I have to say that while I don't have a basis of comparison as far as the change you were referring to him undergoing, I do see the focus in his face and the fire in his eyes. Seth Rollins is ready to do some big things on Anarchy, the first thing being toppling the Deadman.
Joey Styles: It's quite possibly the first match in history to be so bad blooded and personal between two men that've never met before.
Mick Foley: How so?
Joey Styles: Well, one could argue that Seth Rollins is responsible for Kane no longer being here on Wednesday nights since Seth's removal from the match left the "Big Red Monster" to fend for himself.
Mick Foley: Ah, so it's a case of the big brother standing up for his baby bro. I love it, but since Kane and Rollins tagged together for so long, I see Seth fighting for his honor as well.
Joey Styles: Honor, survival, however you want to slice it. You know from experience how dominating an opponent The Undertaker is.
Mick Foley: My back hurts just thinking about it, Joey.
Rollins makes his way down the ramp and enters the ring, ascending the nearest turnbuckle and posing for the crowd.
Christy Hemme: From Davenport, Iowa. Weighing in at two hundred and seventeen pounds. Seth...Rollins!
Rollins climbs down from the turnbuckle and hops back and forth, psyching himself up in preparation for the match ahead.
Christy Hemme: And the opponent...
The lights in the arena go out as the fans pop simultaneously.
GONG!
GONG!
[video=youtube;BAnCYz3j55k]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BAnCYz3j55k&feature=player_embedded[/video]
As the gong hits first time through the Anarchy, crowd goes wild and lights goes off. Everyone in the arena, including Seth Rollins looking at the entrance, waiting for Deadman to come to Anarchy for the very first time. And there he is! Through the mist, you can see the big body of The Undertaker!
Mick Foley: And the chills are being felt all throughout the arena as the Deadman makes his presence known here live.
Joey Styles: It's unlike anything I've ever experienced before.
Mick Foley: Seth Rollins is either wishing he was someone or somewhere else right now or is like a kid on Christmas morning ready to open the big gift. I always loved the big gift.
Joey Styles: What he needs to worry about is escaping with his soul, not winning or losing.
Mick Foley: You have to wonder how closely Sting is going to be watching this one.
Joey Styles: It's hard to say. With the monumental loss at Wrestlemania still fresh on his mind, he may not be watching it at all.
He walks down the ramp slowly. Seth's eyes are locked on Undertaker. Undertaker walks on the steps and gets on the apron.
Christy Hemme: From Death Valley. Weighing in at two hundred and ninety-nine pounds, The Undertaker!
He enters the ring and takes his hat off as he looks to Seth with furious eyes as the lights come up and the ring bell sounds.
DING DING!
VS.
The bell rings and the "Phenom" wastes no time going on the offensive as he hits Seth with a hard right, a blow that sends the young man staggering back into the ropes. Seth steps away from the ropes and heads in the direction of his opponent as the Deadman tees off and pops Seth with another hard right that sends him back into the ropes. Rollins is a bit flustered now as he walks towards Undertaker quickly and hits him with a right of his own. Undertaker's head rocks with the impact but he stands his ground as Seth hits him with another and then another, the Deadman still not budging. Rollins becomes increasingly flustered as he cocks his fist back as far as he can and launches forward, catching Taker as hard as he can in the jaw, his head rocking violently with the impact of the blow as he is forced to take two steps backward.
Seth goes to follow up but Taker fires back with another hard right, catching Rollins right in the mouth as he falls to the mat but places his arms at his sides slightly behind him so that he is able to somewhat catch himself with his hands. Seth begins to push himself upward as he plants his heels but before he can get any closer to a vertical base than that, Taker comes at him and connects with a big boot that levels the young upstart.
Mick Foley: Yowza, right to the melon.
Joey Styles: When Seth landed that punch, he looked to be sliding into the driver's seat, but the "Deadman" is still in control of this match-up.
Mick Foley: What Seth needs to do is play to his own strengths when attacking instead of fighting fire with fire and attempting to beat the "Phenom" at his own game.
Joey Styles: Still one of the best strikers in the business is The Undertaker.
Seth rolls over onto his knees and elbows as he clutches his head in agony, burying his face between his elbows in the mat. Taker shows no mercy as he grabs a handful of Seth's hair and yanks him backward, leaving Rollins in a seated position at the Deadman's feet. Undertaker goes for a sleeper hold but as he does Seth extends his arms outward to his sides, a hand on each of the Deadman's biceps, and pushes outward, forcing Taker's arms apart so that he can't apply the hold. Undertaker is none too appreciative of this as he headbutts Seth, Undertaker's forehead connecting with the top of his opponent's as Rollins slumps forward in a daze and Taker stands up, palming Seth's head with his left hand and slamming it violently against the mat.
Seth lie there in a daze as the Deadman delivers a violent stomp to his solar plexus, causing Rollins to sit up coughing as he holds his abdominal area in pain. Taker crouches behind him positioning his left knee between Seth's shoulder blades and wrapping his left arm around Seth's throat as he wrenches back, choking Rollins with his wrist and causing pain due to the upper back due to the placement of the knee. Taker releases the hold after a moment and stands up, grabbing Seth by the sides of both shoulders and swinging his leg backward before bringing it forward quickly, driving his knee in between Rollins' shoulder blades with sickening force. Rollins rocks forward but Taker pulls him back into a seated position and grabs a handful of Seth's hair with his left hand as he pulls backward, forcing Seth to look up at him as Taker bends his own arm upward and begins striking Seth in the forehead with the point of his elbow with quick strikes.
Mick Foley: Seth's still trying to outdo The Undertaker in strength and brawling. Break out the high-flying stuff, kid. Use your agility.
Joey Styles: With all the energy he came out here with, I thought it was a given he was going to.
Mick Foley: He's just a chew toy in the big dog's yard right now, Joey.
Seth is opened up by the fourth shot as blood begins to form where he's being attacked, some of it on his forehead where the wound has been created and some of it on the elbow of his attacker who just keeps lighting into him. After about twelve quick and brutal strikes, Taker grabs Seth by the shoulders and yanks him upward, placing him on his feet before pushing him as Seth staggers into the nearest corner, his back turned to the Undertaker. Taker takes off running, looking to sandwich Seth between himself and the turnbuckle but right before he makes contact, Seth grabs the ropes and throws himself upward so that he slips behind Taker just as he's colliding with the turnbuckle.
Rollins begins attacking the upper back of his opponent with a flurry of hard rights but Taker turns and catches him in the side of the jaw with the point of his elbow, sending Seth towards the mat but before he can fall, Taker grabs his wrist and pulls him to a vertical base, leading him over to the corner as the Phenom goes to the top turnbuckle.
Mick Foley: He's going for it!
Joey Styles: If The Undertaker connects with this, it could be the beginning of the end for Seth Rollins.
Undertaker walks along the top rope, still having hold of Seth's wrist, and gets ready to execute
Old School but Rollins has had enough as he turns and punches Undertaker in the groin, causing the Deadman to hunch over and lose his balance. As he falls forward, Seth hooks his head and uses the momentum that Taker is falling with to counter into a Spike DDT that gets gasps from the crowd. Seth ascends the top rope of the nearest corner to follow up his offense, but suddenly the Undertaker sits up. Wasting no time, Rollins leaps from the corner and connects with the top of the Deadman's head with a double foot stomp that causes Taker to rock as far forward as his body will allow, his forehead touching the mat. Seth leaps from the point of impact and does a front roll through the air as he lands on his feet and turns, swinging his leg forward and kicking Taker in the head like it was a soccer ball as Taker is sent onto his back hard.
Taker sits up, a small patch of blood above the bridge of his nose reflecting where Seth kicked him as he climbs to a vertical base, showing signs of dizziness following the Spike DDT and double foot stomp to the top of his head from earlier. Taker and Seth stare one another down for a moment before the Deadman taunts him by rolling his eyes back into his head and doing a cutthroat gesture, sending the crowd into a cheering frenzy. Rollins responds to this by going for the
Avada Kedavra superkick but Taker sidesteps and Seth finds himself hung up in the ropes. Taker goes for a big boot but Seth springs off the mat with his free foot and leaps over the top rope, landing on the apron and dodging the attack, his back turned to Taker. Undertaker grabs Seth by the hair and gets a handful but Rollins leaps upward and hits him with a Pele' Kick, sending Taker backwards and falling to the mat and somehow sticking the landing and saving himself from a crash and burn.
Joey Styles: That was impressive.
Mick Foley: This whole exchange has been impressive. I told you all he had to do was play to his strengths.
As Taker is lying there flat on his back, Seth follows up with a bit of an unorthodox maneuver as he backflips from the apron over the top rope, lands on the mat, staggers backward as though he can't maintain his balance, and then falls to the side, driving the point of his elbow directly into the heart of the Deadman. Seth goes to get up but before he can, Taker grabs his arm and pulls him towards him, grabbing Seth by the back of the head and manuevering the situation into the Gogoplata submission hold.
Joey Styles: Hell's Gate! Hell's Gate! What is Seth Rollins going to do now?
Mick Foley: That Deadman's a cunning one.
While Seth suffers in the hold, Taker decides to add insult to injury as he delivers headbutts to his opponent, further opening the wound created earlier as the blood begins to run down Seth's face. As a crimson mask is created, Taker releases the hold and throws Seth backward, sending him into the ropes. Taker climbs to his feet quickly to meet him but Rollins impressively leaps over the Deadman, locking his legs around Taker's neck and rolling through with his head going through his opponent's legs as Taker soon finds himself with his shoulders to the mat as Seth holds his ankles, having reversed the situation into a pinning predicament. The referee counts.
ONE!
...
TWO!
...
NO!
The Undertaker gets the shoulder up to keep himself in the match as Seth throws Taker's legs to the side and gets to his feet as Undertaker climbs to his. As both men return to a vertical base, Rollins goozles the Phenom as the fans erupt into a mixed reaction.
Joey Styles: He can't seriously be thinking of this!
Mick Foley: He is, Joey!
The Undertaker responds by goozling Seth as the crowd erupts into another mixed reaction as both men stand there locked in a stalemate, Taker's right hand locked around Seth's throat and Seth's right hand locked around Taker's throat. Taker suddenly takes a wide swing at Seth with his left hand, catching Rollins in the ear as Seth releases his hold of his opponent and Taker releases his hold as Seth covers his ear with his hand, hunching slightly in pain. Taker kicks Seth in the stomach with the tip of his boot, causing him to hunch further, then grabs Seth by the shoulders and pulls him forward, positioning his head between his legs as the crowd erupts into another mixed reaction.
Taker is ready to end this as he locks his arms around the waist of his opponent and lifts him into powerbomb position but as he hoists him onto his shoulders, Seth connects with the Undertaker's temples with the point of his elbows simultaneously, sending Taker crashing backward to the mat, Seth sitting on his chest as he reaches back and hooks the leg. The referee counts.
ONE!
...
TWO!
...
THR...NO!
Taker gets his shoulder up, punching Seth in the solar plexus as Rollins falls onto his back off of his opponent as the Deadman stands up. Undertaker rolls his eyes back into his head and does the cutthroat gesture again, signaling Seth's time is running out, but as he does, Rollins dives at his knee, clipping it and sending Taker to the mat on his face. Seth follows up quickly as he sits on the Deadman's back, a foot planted on each of his hands to pin them to the mat, and locks his arms around Taker's head, his hands meeting at the chin as he wrenches upward, lifting Taker's head and upper body off of the mat as Rollins applies a form of camel clutch.
Joey Styles: What a brutal looking submission!
Mick Foley: True, but I wouldn't count the Phenom out yet.
Mick was smart to say this as The Undertaker didn't stay in the hold long at all, managing to slide his hands free from under the weight of Seth's feet as he threw his arms backward and hit Seth in both sides with the point of his elbows. Seth cries out in agony as he releases his hold and staggers backward from his opponent. Undertaker begins to push himself upward and that's when Rollins attacks as he leaps onto his back and applies a sleeper hold, locking his arms around Taker's head and his legs around the upper rib and lower chest area. Taker responds with frustration as he runs backward and throws himself back first into the corner, sandwiching Seth as Rollins cries out in agony. As Taker walks out of the corner, Seth's legs are hanging down lifelessly but he still has the sleeper hold somewhat applied, even though his feet are now on the mat.
Taker reaches back and grabs Seth by the back of the head with his right hand, pulling him upward and throwing him over his shoulder as he locks both arms around Seth's waist, sending the crowd into yet another mixed and frenzied reaction.
Joey Styles: Tombstone! It's over!
Mick Foley: Well, thanks for coming, Seth.
Taker hits the
Tombstone Piledriver with sickening force as Seth lie there, his hair frizzed and all about and his face covered with blood. Taker folds Seth's arms over his body and does his signature taunt of rolling his eyes back in his head and sticking his tongue out as the referee counts the fall.
ONE!
...
TWO!
...
THRE...NO!
At the last possible moment, Seth throws his legs up from the mat and hits Undertaker in the forehead with a sort of from the mat Pele' Kick as Taker is sent staggering to his feet backwards as he rests on the ropes. Seth rolls backward onto his feet and stands up, then turns to face the Deadman who takes a swing but Seth sidesteps the punch and grabs his wrist, irish whipping him into the nearest corner. Taker looks to come running out of the corner but Seth hits him right on point with the
Avada Kedavra superkick and he's sent right back into the corner. Seth hits him again with the
Avada Kedavra as Undertaker is rocked against the turnbuckle he's trapped in before staggering forward towards Seth, who whips him into the opposite corner and hits him with a third consecutive superkick. Taker comes staggering out again and takes a weak swing but Seth grabs his wrist and whips him into the corner downstage from him, connecting with yet another superkick.
Taker now dons a crimson mask as Seth whips him into the fourth and final corner, the Deadman beaten and exhausted, the crowd booing more than cheering as they feel like there's no way Rollins could do what he's planning to do. Surely enough, Seth sizes the Phenom up, and BAM! Hits him with the fifth
Avada Kedavra superkick in a row. Taker staggers out of the corner with the last of his strength and hits Seth in the mouth with as hard of a right as he can throw at this point, then falls to his knees, his left hand on the mat, his right hand with a fistful of Seth's shirt, and his head hung, blood dripping from his face onto the mat. Seth grabs Taker and raises him slightly to his feet, hooking his head.
Joey Styles: What's he going for now?
Rollins screams, "BLACKOUT!" as he turns Taker so that he's facing upward and falls, hitting him with a move familiar to many, the Scorpion Death Drop!
Joey Styles: Well that was unexpected.
Seth hooks the leg as the referee heads over to count.
ONE!
...
TWO!
...
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Christy Hemme: Here is your winner, Seth Rollins!
Joey Styles: A brutal match-up with an unexpected finish, Seth Rollins has not only beaten The Undertaker, but he has done it with his mentor's finishing move.
Mick Foley: Let's be honest here though, Joey, any of the five superkicks could have possibly done it, and I'd say Taker was done by the third, the other two were just showing off and the Death Drop was the unnecessary cherry. There's defeating someone and then there's taking it to disrespectful extremes, and that my friend was a disrespectful extreme.
Joey Styles: Disrespect or no disrespect, this is a new Seth Rollins we're seeing, and if he can keep this up the future looks bright indeed for the Purveyors of Poison.
Seth Rollins celebrates his victory as Anarchy returns to commercial.
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COMMERCIAL TWO
Let's see if I can keep this up.
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The first ever edition of UWF Anarchy rolls on as we witness the titantron light up. Our attentions are drawn to a bright sky with barely a cloud floating by, when a voice peaks the UWF Universe's interest.
???: It's a DAMN good time to be champion!
The camera pans down and we're shown who the voice belongs to, but the camera is too slow as the UWF Universe already know who it is - it's the newly crowned UWF Extreme Champion, Taz.
Taz: So right now I'm standing out the back of the Izod Center here in East Rutherford, New Jersey, and it's gonna be the very setting the world remembers every frickin' detail of how The Human Suplex Machine went about becoming the UWF Extreme Champion at Wrestlemania 2. I spoke earlier in the week regarding my match tonight against Curt Hawkins and I said that I'd save the details for now, so consider this me keeping my word once again.
Taz pauses momentarily for effect.
Taz: For weeks I traded words with Trish Stratus while that bone head, Umaga, stood in the background looking stupid rather than menacing. In saying that, I have to give the idiot credit where it's due - he's one tough son of a bitch, but that's something we all knew. For months he's mown through the NXT roster and nobody showed even the slightest sign of stopping him, so it was about time somebody taught him and Trish a lesson. Frankly, I've never been so sick of hearing somebody's voice as I am of hearing Trish's, so losing at Wrestlemania was simply not an option. I didn't care what I had to do, whether it meant the usual circumstance of putting my body on the line to get the job done. I was willing to do absolutely whatever it took to see to it that Umaga is no longer seen as an unstoppable beast that he's portrayed as being, and that Anarchy can finally get some peace and quiet, even if brief, from Trish's words. For somebody who was so widely respected, not just as a competitor but also as an individual, Trish has fallen so far from grace that it's unbelievable. She has lowered herself to petty threats and immature insults expected from some punk kid with no respect, and if Umaga's dominant streak was to continue... well, god knows how bad she would've gotten. In fact, I'm not surprised to hear her run her mouth again throughout the week, dishing out the usual excuses, but that just makes this victory all the more satisfying!
Taz briefly smirks before getting on with it.
Taz: But now that that's out of the way, it's time for details. Now I know I'm a man who does things by the book and prefers to take every challenge head on, but sometimes you need to change it up a little. Throughout the majority of my NXT career, I'd been stepped on, mistreated, disrespected, and seen as a washed up old fool who should've stayed behind the announce table. I've been stabbed in the back, I've been screwed around with, and frankly it was about time I got some payback! All I needed was my target, so I set my sights on my old pal, Rhino, the very man whose actions forced me to alter my perception and stop doing things for everybody else and instead to focus on myself. I set out to ruin Rhino and his hollow reign as the new NXT Champion, and sure enough I was handed an opportunity to land myself in a number one contender's match for a title shot at Wrestlemania. I fell short in my attempts, but the fault wasn't mine - it was Trish's. My opponent for the night was Umaga, and right when it all looked promising, Trish pulled her little tricks and I was screwed out of my spot in that contender's match. So even though I was given Rhino the following week, I looked at it as an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone - pull everybody's attention towards beating the crap out of Rhino, followed by pulling off the shock of the night by simply destroying Umaga!
Taz bites his bottom lip, really enjoying that thought.
Taz: Sure enough I beat the crap out of Rhino, only for Coach to pull the same crap Trish did the previous week so Rhino could escape with his tail between his frickin' legs instead of in pieces. But don't worry, the time will come when Rhino gets what's coming from him seeing how Sting failed to do the job for me, but in the meantime I went ahead with the other side of my plan by manhandling Umaga in a way nobody has ever witnessed before. Trish criticised me for attacking Umaga from behind, but really all I did was even up the score, even if I put to side my "by the book" ways. I needed to get their attention... and I did! Sure enough I landed myself a title match at Wrestlemania after all, but here's the kicker - I shocked the world for a second time! It's not because I was the Last Man Standing, it was because of the way in which I was victorious. I pulled off the mastermind of the century, every little detail planned out to perfection, and it scored me the Extreme Championship and one hell of a night to remember. See I spent the weeks telling Trish and Umaga that I would beat Umaga so badly he wouldn't be capable of answering the ten count, but the fact is Umaga lacks the common sense to comprehend when enough is enough. Umaga's too stupid to know when to go down and stay down, so I decided to play Trish at her own game... and lead them both into a trap.
Taz rubs his hands together, preparing to recount the end of the match.
Taz: I was more than prepared to cop some painful moments for the greater good, and I did just that to ensure nobody speculated a thing. I had to be patient and bide my time, holding off until the right moment before pulling the trigger so nobody suspected a thing. I had Umaga down and Trish looked me dead in the eyes and said "you can’t keep him down", which proved the opportunity to do the deed. So I went ahead and walked to the side of the stage and began to climb the scaffolding, only to look back momentarily and see Umaga following me like a lap dog. Umaga will follow you off a frickin' cliff if you jumped, so there was no chance in hell Trish could convince him not to join me on the scaffolding. Next thing I know we're up there, we fought, and I pulled out the concealed crowbar, meeting it with Umaga's head, followed by tying his feet up with the chain. In hindsight the chain wasn't necessary as pushing Umaga off the scaffolding and watching him fall through the stage would've done the job without a doubt, so in reality Trish should be thanking me for taking the alternative just so she has something to talk about. But what's done is done, the chains worked a treat, and Umaga hung their helplessly as I watched my plan result in success over a ten count. See that's the thing, and I hope you're listening to this, Trish - in a match with no rules, there's no book to follow!
Taz shrugs his shoulders, proving he was well within his rights.
Taz: And as a result I'm the NEW UWF Extreme Champion, the first of the Anarchy era. There'll come a time when I'll lose this title, that's an inevitable fact, but it's going to be on MY terms. I welcome any challenge, whether a newly drafted superstar or a survivor of the NXT roster. Now that I have vindication and a reason to continue on in the face of adversity, there's not a damn man on Wednesday nights who can stop The Most Miserable Son of a Bitch on the Planet when he's on a roll like this! Next month is the Money in the Bank pay-per-view, so I'm issuing the call to the entire roster to step up and show your worth. If you want a shot for the Extreme Championship at Money in the Bank, prove to Stone Cold you're worth one. That's all the proof I'll need, but just know you'll be walking into the most brutal match of your life. Don't say you weren't warned!
And with that, Taz shifts out of the camera's view and no time is wasted. The camera shuts off and Anarchy returns to the commentary table.
Joey Styles: Strong words from our new Extreme Champion. After a speech like that, who wouldn't be inspired to step up their efforts and challenge Taz?
Mick Foley: I'm retired and it inspired me to want to challenge for the Extreme Championship! I'm going to stay on this side of the table though.
Joey Styles: Well someone that better step up is the "Party Starter" Curt Hawkins as he takes on the man we just heard from, the "Most Miserable Son of a Bitch on the Planet" Taz.
Things return to the ring where Christy Hemme is standing by to introduce the next match.
Christy Hemme: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first...
[video=youtube;dgjBOdZsK_0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgjBOdZsK_0&feature=player_embedded[/video]
"Deadman's Hand" hits the arena, prompting the UWF Universe to burst into cheers for the arrival of Taz. Taz quickly emerges from the back in street clothes, eyes covered by his trademark sunglasses, a scowl etched across his face, and the UWF Extreme Championship around his waist.
Christy Hemme: From the Red Hook Section of Brooklyn, New York. Weighing in at two hundred and forty pounds. He is the Extreme Champion, Taz!
Taz doesn't take the time to soak in the atmosphere, instead choosing to make his way down the ramp and towards the ring, whilst the crowd continue to cheer a man with a new and arguably improved attitude.
Joey Styles: The confidence in Taz is undeniable, and rightfully so after what he went through to win that belt draped over his shoulder.
Mick Foley: I appreciate his attitude but at the same time I advise he be careful, Curt Hawkins is a new opponent so who knows what he can expect.
Joey Styles: I don't think he's too worried about that, Mick, Taz is looking for a submission tonight and one way or another, he's going to get it.
Taz eventually reaches the steel steps, not breaking stride along the way, as he makes his way up them and promptly enters the ring. He crosses his arms as he awaits the arrival of his opponent.
Mick Foley: Is he going to wrestle in his street clothes?
Joey Styles: You wrestled in flannel.
Mick Foley: Good point.
Christy looks at Taz, seemingly wondering the same thing, then shrugs and resumes the introductions.
Christy Hemme: And the opponent...
The fans pop as "In The Middle of It" plays and Curt Hawkins walks out onto the stage with Tyler Reks in tow. He looks to both sides of the stage, watching the fans cheer for him. Hawkins raises his cane in respect as both men make their way down the ramp.
Mick Foley: I didn't know he had some muscle with him. That changes the dynamic of this one.
Joey Styles: Nah, Taz is still gonna tap him.
Mick Foley: I love Taz as much as you, Joey, but let's try to be unbiased here. After all, isn't that what annoyed you most about Matt?
Joey Styles: Fair enough.
Hawkins continues to make his way down the ramp before rolling into the ring under the bottom rope and posing for the fans, Tyler remaining at ringside.
Christy Hemme: From Queens, New York. Weighing in at two hundred and twenty-five pounds. He is the "Party Starter", Curt Hawkins!
Curt and Taz make eye contact as the bell rings, signifying it's time for things to get underway.
VS.
Immediately Curt Hawkins launches into an attack on Taz with a lunging Forearm Smash to the top of the hand which sends Taz stumbling back into the corner. Hawkins immediately goes on the attack in the corner with big shots to the top of Taz's head until 'The Human Suplex Machine' drops down in the corner. Curt Hawkins then begins to stomp the fallen Extreme Champion. Curt steps onto the throat of Taz and chokes him under his weight as the referee counts. Eventually the referee does his five count and Curt Hawkins is forced to let Taz free in the corner. Hawkins turns around and takes some time to throw his hands up into the air, this however comes to bite him as Taz immediately gets to his feet, wraps his arms under those of Hawkins which are raised in a Full Nelson before lifting Hawkins up into the air and back down to the mat with a sickening Release Dragon Suplex which spikes Curt Hawkins on his head and leaves him loopy as he tries to regain some composure. Taz has no interest in letting Hawkins to his feet and as he gets to his knees Taz runs and kicks him square in the jaw dropping Hawkins down to the outside.
Foley: The Brooklyn Boot!, hey did you know I tried to patent a Long Island Boot but apparently some other guy said it was his move.
Styles: I'm sure Hawkins knows who that would be, although after that kick I doubt he'd be able to tell you with his jaw wired shut!
Taz drops down to the outside and continues his assault on the Anarchy newcomer. He grabs him by the head and smashes it off of the ringside barricade and then off of the edge of the ring. Still holding the head of his opponent he tosses him shoulder first into the Steel Ring steps showing no remorse. Tyler Reks come walking around the corner in an attempt to intimidate Taz no doubt but Taz shows little sign of intimidation as he steps up to Tyler Reks and invites him to take a shot. Before he can Hawkins comes up from behind and clubs Taz over the back of the head before hitting him with a Vertical Suplex on the outside. Hawkins picks Taz up and throws him into the ring. Hawkins then sets about climbing up to the top rope but before he can get to a vertical stance on the top rope Taz throws himself into the ropes which causes Hawkins' legs to split which causes him to crotch himself up on the top turnbuckle. Taz then climbs up to the top rope and wraps his arms around the arm and head of Hawkins before throwing himself back and Hawkins flying through the air to the mat below with a Super Tazplex!
Styles: Oh my god!, what impact!.
Foley: I've been on the receiving end of that and that's a real devastating move right there.
Tyler Reks gets up on the ring apron but Taz is aware of this as he gets to his feet and launches an attack on Hawkins' heavy. Taz drags him into the ring and hits him with a release T-Bone Tazplex. Reks can barely get to his feet by the time Taz has slapped on the Tazmission!. Reks writhes in agony as Taz cranks the choke hold. The referee seperates the two. Taz eventually releases and gets to his feet just as Hawkins goes for a Superkick. Taz grabs the foot, brings Hawkins in and hits him with the Capture Tazplex into the ring corner!. Hawkins crumples in the corner but Taz is quick to his feet and locks in the Tazmission. He drags his opponent to the centre of the ring before dropping down and wrapping the legs around in a Body Scissors, Hawkins has no other choice, he's been beaten resoundly in his debut and he knows it, Taz forces the submission as Hawkins taps violently on the mat!.
Winner via Submission - The UWF Extreme Champion Taz!
Taz releases the hold and looks down at his fallen foe, entirely unimpressed. Taz is handed the Extreme Championship by the referee and he has it wrapped around his waist before leaving the ring.
Foley: Damn impressive from Taz there Joey.
Styles: He certainly left no question marks regarding his mean streak in that non-title match Mick.
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COMMERCIAL THREE
CATWOMAN!!!!
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Wrestlemania. The one platform that every athlete in our industry once to perform on more than any other platform. It's the one night of the year that whether you win or you lose, you're just grateful that you were there, it's a proud night because even if things didn't go your way as far as the outcome goes, you still got to perform. I don't find myself feeling proud or even all that grateful, and that's because I made a mistake and cost myself the thing that I wanted most. I wanted my career to have that final highlight, one last run on top, one more reign with a championship but I allowed myself to get overly confident and underestimate my opponent, and because of that it didn't matter how much of an effort I put forth, he already had me beaten.
What was supposed to be the proudest moment of my UWF tenure ended up being the most humiliating night of my career. It's something that I'm not sure I have it in me to forgive myself for, something I can't run fast enough to escape or live down. The question on everyone's minds regards what's next for the Stinger over these next few weeks, they're dying to know, all of you. Well I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I don't have an answer. I'm not sure what's going to happen over the next few weeks, I'm not sure what's going to happen next week. Even tonight is a mystery. It's appropriate though, isn't it? For my entire career I have proclaimed that the only thing for sure about Sting is nothing's for sure. I'm living that out right now, there's barely enough light ahead for me to see my own two feet as I walk forward.
This is the moment I find myself at a crossroads, an ultimatum weighing heavily on my heart. Do I seize the spotlight once again and be the "Icon" that everyone wants to be, or do I let that Wrestlemania loss be the last that anyone sees of me and quietly fade off into the shadows? I certainly don't feel like a Hall of Famer right now, that's for sure, at least not a deserving one. Sorry folks, but Anarchy is an entity that may just have to exist without the Stinger.
Joey Styles: Sting certainly isn't acting like himself tonight.
Mick Foley: Of course not, Joey, a defeat like that takes a lot out of a man.
Joey Styles: I just can't imagine not having him around after he's been such a huge part of things.
Mick Foley: I guess we'll know more when he decides to appear live, Joey. Speaking of mysteries though, one of Anarchy's newest signings has a seemingly insatiable appetite and he's looking to snack on Kurt Angle here tonight.
Joey Styles: Kurt's got his hands full with the "Big Hungry", but Ryback shouldn't count his chickens just yet. After all, Kurt Angle's undefeated for a reason.
It is once again time for some in-ring action as the camera pans over to Christy Hemme.
DING DING!
Christy Hemme: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first...
The marching drum roll of Kurt Angle's brand new theme kicks in and the crowd is set ablaze into wild cheers, some fans are even chanting "USA!" while others are chanting "Kurt! Kurt! Kurt!" but it all is pointing towards one single thing, the arrival of Kurt Angle, the fans are looking everywhere for him, that's when he slowly begins to merging coming out the ground.
Mick Foley: Well that's certainly one way to make an entrance!
Joey Styles: Ryback better hope Kurt doesn't have access to a milk truck tonight.
Mick Foley: What?
Kurt Angle has his hood up but he looks intense as he appears from the backstage, he slowly walks forward and takes a moment before doing his signature opening pose setting off more pyros.
Christy Hemme: From Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Weighing in at two hundred and thirty-seven pounds. He is the "Olympic Gold Medalist", Kurt Angle!
The fans are set ablaze by Kurt Angle as he marches down the entrance ramp, high-fiving some of the younger fans en route but Kurt is all business tonight, he runs up the ringsteps and through the middle rope, spinning on the spot to demonstrate. Kurt Angle stands in the middle of the ring and the fans go nuts, chanting his name, but then all that is interrupted by...
"FEED ME!"
"Meat On The Table" by Jim Johnston begins to play as Ryback comes out from the backstage and stands at the top of the ramp, hanging his head and closing his eyes, nodding along with the beat of his music. He looks up and at the ring as he says, "More", followed by, "Wake up!" as he makes his way down the ramp with intensity.
Mick Foley: What a beast of a man we have in Ryback, I've never seen anything like him.
Joey Styles: There's certainly a lot of people he reminds me of, but there are several ways that he's unique, I'll give you that.
Ryback enters the ring and begins swinging his arms and starting a "Feed Me More!" chant with the crowd as Christy introduces him.
Christy Hemme: From Sin City. Weighing in at two hundred and ninety-two pounds. Ryback!
Ryback turns to Angle and shouts, "Feeding Time!" as the bell rings again and the match gets underway.
DING DING!
VS.
Ryback runs at Angle like a bat out of hell with an attempt at a clothesline but Angle ducks. Ryback turns round into a right hand from Angle, Angle proceeds to hit Ryback with the right hands until Ryback is against the ring ropes. Angle Irish Whips Ryback across the ring and off the opposite ring ropes, Angle grabs the rebounding Ryback and wraps his arms around his waist however Ryback seeing it coming transfers his weight down onto Angle taking the Olympian down with a Lou Thesz Press. Ryback grabs Angle by the neck and smashes him down onto the mat several times before raising him to his feet. Ryback lifts Angle up and runs him into the corner of the ring before hitting him with repeated Shoulder Thrusts in the corner, driving the wind from Angle. Ryback then grabs the hand of Angle before pulling him from the corner and attempting the Short-Arm Clothesline but Angle ducks, he gets behind Ryback and proceeds to wrap his arms around his waist and lift him into the air, dropping him down behind him with a German Suplex. Angle keeps the waist-lock applied as he drags 'Big Hungry' back to his feet to hit him with a second German Suplex.
Foley: This Ryback has strength and size to his advantage but strength and size don't mean much when you're being tossed around by a former Olympic Gold Medalist like Kurt Angle.
Styles: True, but the resolve of Ryback can't be questioned and I'm sure it will take more than a few German Suplexes to put away 'Big Hungry' tonight.
Angle has the waist-lock applied still and drags Ryback to his feet for a second time before attempting the third consecutive German Suplex but Ryback manages to grab hold of the ring ropes and uses his amazing strength to hold on no matter how hard Angle pulls back. Eventually the referee has to force a break at the count of five and Angle is put into the corner where the referee warns him that if he doesn't break the hold to his count he will be disqualified. Unfazed Angle moves forward but only into a Spear from Ryback!. With Angle down Ryback begins to feel some power rushing to him from the crowd, he goes into the corner and pumps himself up. He pumps his fist as the crowd chant 'FEED ME MORE!' in rhythm to his moves. As Angle slowly gets back to his feet he turns around as Ryback runs towards him going for the Meat Hook Clothesline but he ducks under it and sweeps the legs of Ryback and immediately locks in his signature Ankle Lock!. Angle really cranks the Ankle as Ryback reaches for the bottom rope. The crowd are still chanting 'FEED ME MORE!' for their new hero Ryback as he struggles to escape Angle's clutches.
Styles: Ankle Lock applied this could be the end for Ryback!.
Foley: I know the kid's resilient but by god, that is a sickening angle that Angle has his ankle in!... did you get that?.
Styles: Just about!
Ryback eventually gives up on trying to reach the bottom rope and instead uses his strength to pull himself up and turn himself around allowing him to kick Angle in the chest and push him away, breaking the hold. Ryback struggles to his feet but Angle is already on them as he grabs Ryback around the waist and hits him with another German Suplex!. Angle keeps the arms locked around Ryback's waist and proceeds to drag him to his feet and hit another German Suplex. Ryback is knocked loopy by this one landing on the back of his head, but still Angle keeps the waist-lock applied as he lifts him again and slams him down to the mat with a third German Suplex this time releasing the giant Ryback into the air with him crashing to the mat with a sickening thud with the fifth German Suplex in total. As Ryback writhes in pain on the mat Angle is already on his feet where he proceeds to pull the straps of his singlet down and roar with intensity waiting for Ryback to get back onto his feet, the crowd know what is happening next and they chant 'Let's Go Angle!' as he prepares for his finishing maneuver.
Styles: The straps are down, that can only mean one thing!.
Foley: He's feeling a bit overdressed?... he's too warm?... OH I GET IT!, OLYMPIC SLAM COMING UP!.
Ryback is struggling to get back to his feet but is remarkably doing so after the punishing German Suplexes he has withstood. He eventually gets back to his feet and Angle is just waiting there behind him. As Ryback stumbles backwards Angle goes for the Olympic Slam but Ryback gets out and lands down behind Angle, Angle turns around and Ryback absolutely kills him with a sickening Meat Hook Clothesline!. The crowd go crazy for Ryback as he slaps his head, cranks his neck and yells out 'FINISH IT!'. Ryback goes over to Angle and reaches down to pick the fallen American Hero back up to a vertical basis but the wiley veteran takes advantage of Ryback's outstretched arm and brings him down into a Triangle Choke!. Angle is choking Ryback out between his thighs but Ryback refuses to go, he lifts Angle up and drives him down to the mat with a Powerbomb but Angle refuses to relinquish the hold. Ryback repeats the escape attempt but still Angle holds on with great tenacity. Ryback goes for a third attempt but this time he's faded so much that he cannot lift Angle and simply falls to the side as Angle tightens his grip. Ryback is unconscious and the referee if forced to call for the bell!.
Winner via TKO: Kurt Angle!
Angle releases the hold as the referee checks on Ryback who is already beginning to come around.
Styles: That's two matches in a row that Angle's forced his opponent to pass out in a submission hold.
Foley: There was simply nowhere for Ryback to go in that Triangle Choke showing that Angle can pull anything from anywhere to finish off a match.
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COMMERCIAL FOUR
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[video=youtube;ijXQ6Lyc6Us]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijXQ6Lyc6Us[/video]
The crowd is seemingly brought to their feet in unison as the infamous sound of the breaking glass pierces the sounds that were going on in the arena and everyone cheers and waves about their signs as the General Manager of Anarchy and "Texas Rattlesnake" himself makes his way from the backstage and heads down the ramp with a purpose.
Joey Styles: Are you ready to have the new World Championship unveiled, Mick?
Mick Foley: I haven't been around long enough to see the current one!
Stone Cold quickly makes his way down the ramp as he climbs onto the apron and steps through the ropes, entering the ring.
Upon entering the ring, Austin heads to the nearest turnbuckle and poses for the capacity crowd.
Stone Cold descends the turnbuckle and heads over to the far ropes, getting a microphone from the ringside official as he turns and raises the microphone, ready to address the crowd.
Stone Cold: When I came out here earlier tonight I promised ya two things, that I was gonna reveal who my co-General Manager is and that we were gonna bring the "War Machine" out here and give him a new belt ta' suit all the changes 'round here. Well let's not mince words and waste anymore time. Ladies and gentlemen, the co-General Manager of Wednesday Night Anarchy...
[video=youtube;gPJK4MLEieE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gPJK4MLEieE[/video]
The capacity crowd is on their feet as none other than Jim Cornette appears from behind the curtain and makes his way down the ramp. As he walks up the steel steps onto the apron and enters the ring, Stone Cold gives him a microphone and as the music fades out to silence, an audible, "Welcome Back Corny!" *clap clap clapclapclap* chant is heard starting up. Jim raises his microphone as he looks out at all of them.
Jim Cornette: Oh you better believe it, UWF, I'm back and unlike that piece of shit Bischoff used to falsely advertise, I really am better than ever. When Stone Cold gave me a phone call and told me that he wanted me to help him run this joint and clued me in regarding all the changes and the vision he had for this place, well, needless to say I couldn't get here quick enough. We are the powers that be on Wednesday nights from here on out, calling all the shots and making all the decisions and there's not a damn thing a CM Punk or a Trish Stratus or anyone else that may disagree with the decision can do about it except like it or or pout about it, I can't say I really give a rat's ass either way. What I do care about is this other matter of business we have to take care of, and that's getting that Sesame Street, this title reign is brought to you by the letter 'X', Toys 'R Us belt off of our champion and giving him a real belt to wear. So Rhino, if you wouldn't mind, charge your ass out here.
[video=youtube;LlnmNkMivHc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlnmNkMivHc[/video]
Rhino's theme, 'War Machine' by Kiss begins to play, the famous riff playing over the snapping snare drum before finally the the drum fill plays and the theme kicks into full swing. Rhino emerges from the back alone, no Coach tonight, as lyrics are belted out through the audio system Rhino marches down to the ring the NXT Heavyweight Title wrapped tightly around his waist. He makes the run at the bottom of the ramp and slides into the ring, he walks straight past Cornette and Austin before he heads to the top rope and unwraps the title proceeding to beat his chest and throw both hands into the air with the title belt in one hand and the other a clenched fist. Rhino lets out a primal roar as the crowd too roar with approval before stepping down as he shakes Cornette's hand and then Austin's.
Rhino: I'll be honest, Steve, ever since this whole thing was announced I've been feeling a lot of anxiety. (What?) I've been under a lot of stress. (What?) Hell, I've been downright angry. (What?) And the reason I've been all of those things is because I thought with the changing of the guard around here, I was going to be stripped of my World Championship. Because you see, I'm the NXT World Champion, if you were keeping that title around I wouldn't be worried, but you're introducing an entirely different belt, one that I'm not the holder of, and damnit I fought hard to become the top of the food chain around here. I Gored my way through the best of the best like they were tissue paper, and if after all that you were going to strip me of what's mine just because you got a wild hair up your ass and wanted to do away with NXT, I was going to aim my next Gore at YOU!
The crowd reacts to this with mostly boos.
Rhino: But I know you're not that stupid, as does Coach, which is why I calmed down about it and stand here referring to that way of thinking in the past tense instead of the present tense. So let's have it, let's see my new belt.
Austin looks at Rhino and strokes his goatee. Cornette goes to raise his microphone but Stone Cold stops him, affirming him that he'll handle it.
Stone Cold: Sounds ta' me like someone's getting a little damn big for their britches. You're the World Champion, that's true. You fought your ass off to become the World Champion, that's also true. I know that and I respect that, and that's the reason I'm not going to strip you of the belt yer holding and make you fight to rightfully hold the new one, not because I know better. You stand there threatening me? Let me remind you of something you fat sumbitch, you might be the top a' the food chain around here, but me and Cornette are above it. You work for us and if we wanted ta' strip you of the In Ex Tee belt and make you fight for the Anarchy one, we could and there wouldn't be anything you could do except piss and moan and fight for it or take yer ball and go home or go elsewhere. Now you stand there and be damn grateful that, even after yer disrespect, neither of us are gonna do that. You wanna see the damn belt? Here's the damn belt.
A wire is lowered from the rafters to the ring with a belt on the end of it. The fans go wild as Rhino looks at the belt, then at his own, then back at the new belt. He takes the NXT World Championship off of his shoulder, holds it out in front of him, kisses it, and then tosses it into the crowd to a huge pop. Rhino grabs the new belt and puts it around his waist before heading to the nearest turnbuckle, ascending it and posing for the crowd.
Stone Cold and Cornette applaud Rhino before Cornette takes his microphone and resumes speaking.
Jim Cornette: There's just one more order of business to take care of, Rhino. Stone Cold and I won't make you fight for it, but you're sure as hell gonna have to fight to keep it because at the Money in the Bank pay-per-view, you're defending it. In the Anarchy main event it's going to be the UWF International Champion Rhino defending his belt against the man cashing in his rematch clause, the "Best in the World" CM Punk, and the undefeated "Olympic Gold Medalist" Kurt Angle!
Rhino doesn't look happy as Cornette and Austin exit the ring and the camera pans back to the commentary table.
Joey Styles: What a blockbuster announcement, Mick! The main event of Money in the Bank decided on right here tonight!
Mick Foley: The inclusion of Angle seems a bit out of left field, but I suppose there's more than one way to earn yourself a contendership.
Joey Styles: Speaking of contenderships, up next we have the number one contenders to the UWF Tag Team Championships in action. But first, they've got something to say.
The following is brought to you by UWF.com
Ladies and Gentlemen, it's time for the moment 4 of you have been waiting for. It's time for the-
I'm your host with the most...hair, Derrick Bateman! And to my right we have the man, the legend, the myth, Johnny Curtis.
What's up bro! This is our Wrestlemania round up edition of the Double Dragon's Lair. We are going to talk about the card from top to bottom. And with us as always is the new and improved Maxine!
So glad to be here Johnny. I managed to escape from the clutches of Kane and save the day but we'll get back to that later.
You bet your sweet ass we will.
But first we start off with the guys who are trying to bring down this whole company, YES.
You know what, they're a bunch of bullies. They're worse than bullies and we've fought Bully Ray.
These clowns must be so pleased with themselves. You beat two guys who only won the titles because the other team broke up. Big whoop. Try all that stuff against us. I mean I don't know about you Curtis, but when I see a 300 pound man running towards me, I move out of the way.
I would too. He might damage my assets. But those two will get what they deserve because the next match may go down as the greatest match in the history of Wrestlemania.
That’s right bro! A team by the name of the Modern Day Double Dragons were able to secure a victory over Kane and become the new number one contenders to the UWF Tag Team Championships!
Bateman and Curtis jump out of their seats and high five.
But we couldn't have done it without our little minx.
Johnny and Maxine embrace each other as Derrick looks on with disgust.
Actually we couldn't have done it without the help of the Bate Man. I sat down earlier today to have a little one on one with the mysterious fro'd crusader.
The camera cuts to an empty room with Bate Man standing in front of a camera.
Hello fellow citizens. I will make this short because there is justice that needs to be served. I want you all to remember to always report bad things. Many a treacherous villain roam these halls day after day. Only one man has the power to stop them. Only one man can bring about the justice. That man is the Bate Man. He will always be there when you least expect him. He will always be watching from the shadows. He will be swift and merciless. Respect the Bate Man.
Did you get it?
I think so.
How cool did I look?
Dude, so cool.
I was thinking we do another take where a girl is being kidnapped and you see me runnin-
The camera cuts back to Derrick, Johnny and Maxine.
Riveting stuff from the mysterious Bate Man. Up next was Angle vs Jericho. These guys put on a hell of a show. Obviously you got to put on a filler match after a terrific match to make sure the crowd doesn't tire out early but these guys sure did try.
You know, it's kind of sad when people try so hard. It's like pshh try hard bro?
Tooootatly but good job Angle. You'd better hope to never face master technicians such as ourselves.
And up next we got Cesaro vs Hawkins.
As much as I don't like those idiots Hawkins and Reks because they didn't invite us to that party that one time, I hate that that commie got away with another victory. If I was in there reppin' the good ol' US of A, you can bet there would have been a different outcome.
Like an immediate victory for Cesaro.
Why do we let you talk!
These two put on a good show. Cesaro would have lost if he wasn't such a cheater but then again, Hawkins didn't invite us to that party so he kind of deserves it.
And of course we got to see Triple H destroy Robert Roode. I remember when I beat Robert Roode.
That was a long time ago Derrick. Roode was like a different person back then.
Still an asshole to me.
Yeah I guess your right.
HHH has still got it but you have to wonder what's next for him? I mean the man has done a lot in the business and I think it's time for him to step down and let others like myself shine. But up next we got the greatest match next to ours!
Oh geez I know where this is going.
Three guys were fighting over a title but then...The Rock makes his exciting return!
Whoop de do. Who cares. The Rock comes and goes as he pleases and it pisses me off.
Bro he's a movie star! He's busy making movies when he's not wresting.
He should be wrestling full time! That Idiot! Anyways Christopher Daniel retains.
Whoa don't just gloss over that. I know we had your video in so I put one of my own.
Whoa wait what?
Roll it!
Derrick is fighting Johnny over control of the camera as it cuts to this video.
[video=youtube;Z3xM80wQvw8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3xM80wQvw8[/video]
The camera is cut back to Johnny, Derrick and Maxine.
Now obviously it's a movie because The Rock would have killed him instantly
Can we just move on to the next match?
Actually it looks like that clip just ate up the rest of our TV time.
What!?
So for Derrick Bateman and Maxine, this is Johnny Curtis saying goodnight and keep your dancing tight.
As the Dragon's Lair concludes, things return to the arena as the ring bell sounds and the camera pans to Christy Hemme in the ring.
DING DING!
Christy Hemme: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is a tag team match! Introducing first...
Search For: MATT HARDY
Enter Keyword: VERSION 1.0
[video=youtube;S7HIkm5nBnQ]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7HIkm5nBnQ[/video]
The file finishes downloading and out comes the debuting Matt Hardy Version 1.0 with his Mattitude Follower Shannon Moore and his beautiful girlfriend Reby Sky. They have a screen effect where it looks like an old-school quicktime video. A couple of Matt Facts pop up as well, the first one being “Matt and Reby are engaged.†All 3 members are quickly making their way down to ringside.
Mick Foley: Aww, I think that's sweet.
Joey Styles: I can't say I understand it, to be honest with you.
Mick Foley: I just hope we don't ever see friction like we saw when Lita managed Matt and Jeff, or when, ya know, she got involved with Edge.
Joey Styles: As long as Edge is on Raw I don't think Matt has anything to worry about. Besides, Shannon's married.
Reby remains ringside as Shannon and Matt climb onto the apron and enter the ring.
Christy Hemme: From Cameron, North Carolina. Weighing in at a combined weight of four hundred and ten pounds. The team of Shannon Moore and Matt Hardy Version One!
Both men throw up the "V1" sign as the crowd cheers them.
Christy Hemme: And the opponents...
[video=youtube;8FcYfuVW3t8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FcYfuVW3t8&feature=player_embedded[/video]
Derrick Bateman's music hits and the crowd is on their feet in excitement. Derrick and Johnny along with the returning Maxine all come out and walk down the ramp together.
Joey Styles: Well at least I don't have to worry about that idiot Striker marking out next to me over these two anymore.
Mick Foley: Was he really that annoying?
Joey Styles: I found myself envying you for having a damaged ear, I'll put it that way.
Mick Foley: Ah.
Maxine remains at ringside as Johnny and Derrick slide into the ring, each ascending a turnbuckle and posing as Christy finishes the introductions.
Christy Hemme: From the Dragon's Lair. Weighing in at a combined weight of four hundred and sixty-two pounds. The team of Derrick Bateman and Johnny Curtis, the Modern Day Double Dragons!
Johnny and Derrick step down from their respective turnbuckles as they look across the ring at their opponents and get ready for the match ahead.
DING DING!
&
VS.
&
Both teams look at one another from their respective sides of the ring and then begin to converse amongst themselves regarding who is going to start things off. In the Modern Day Double Dragons' corner, it is decided that Johnny Curtis will start things off as Derrick Bateman steps through the ropes and stands on the apron. In the corner of Team Mattitude, it is decided that Shannon Moore will start things off as Matt Hardy steps through the ropes and stands on the apron. The two competitors circle one another, Shannon hopping anxiously as he shakes his hands wildly, seemingly preparing for a lock-up as Curtis looks at him with focus and determination. After circling each other for a moment, the two lock up in a collar-elbow tie-up and are in a dead heat, matched in strength.
Johnny then steps on Shannon's foot, breaking up the tie-up as Moore holds his foot and hops in place, the agony clear in the expression on his face as Johnny takes him to the mat with a clothesline. Johnny walks over to his corner and tells Derrick,
"These two aren't so hard, bro." then takes off running towards Shannon, taking him down with another clothesline as he gets to his feet. Johnny picks Shannon up and grabs his opponent's chin with his left hand, cocking back with his right and connecting with a stiff looking punch. Shannon is taken off his balance as he staggers back into the ropes and springs off of them where Johnny catches him and turns, planting him hard against the mat with a spinebuster. Johnny heads over to his corner again and tells Derrick,
"See? They're nothing." before heading over and stomping Shannon in the chest one good time and dropping an elbow on his lower abdomen.
Johnny starts doing push-ups next to his opponent, his hands leaving the mat as he claps them together twice with each time he goes up. He gets about four in before Shannon kips up, then Johnny climbs to his feet. Shannon goes for a punch but Johnny backhands him, causing Shannon to turn his back as Curtis then grabs him by the ponytail with both hands and swings, throwing him across the ring into the corner as Shannon slouches down into a sitting position, holding the back of his head as Johnny walks back over to his corner.
"See bro? I told you I could play the heel." he says to Derrick as Bateman responds,
"All right, you win the bet." and takes a five dollar bill from his tights and puts it in Johnny's hand.
"Gross bro, you keep your money in your tights?" Johnny asks to which Bateman responds,
"Yeah dude, there's no pockets on them, and since I don't wear a shirt where else would I keep it? My boot? Then it'd be all crumpled and damp with foot sweat. My fro? Then it'd have too much hold to do anything with."
Johnny goes to respond but Shannon goes charging towards him and clotheslines him across the throat, pinning him in the corner. As Moore backs off, Johnny holds his throat and coughs, then speaks in a strained voice.
"Dude, not cool. I was talking to my bro here. Besides, who hits another man in the throat?" to which Shannon responds, "Who throws another man by his ponytail?" to which Johnny responds,
"Who even grows a ponytail?" to which Shannon responds, "Who even grows an afro?" which sends a look of shocked offendedness across the expression of Bateman, who tags himself in as he steps through the ropes and Johnny heads to the apron.
Joey Styles: So are we going to call this match?
Mick Foley: The antics speak for themselves.
Derrick points at Shannon angrily and shouts,
"No one disses the fro, bro!" to which Shannon responds with a standing dropkick that knocks Bateman back into his corner. Shannon gets to his feet and runs at Derrick, leaping into the air and bringing his knees to his chest before extending his legs outward, hitting Bateman in the abdomen with both feet. Bateman gasps for breath as Shannon hits the mat, his feet still on Derrick's abdomen as he monkey flips him to the center of the ring and stands up, ascending the top rope. But before Shannon can do anything, Johnny grabs his ankle and pulls down, crotching Moore right on the ring post as the crowd responds with a collective, "Oooooh!" as Shannon cries out in pain, holding his groin. Derrick runs over and leaps onto the top rope, hooking Shannon's head as he launches backward into a Perfect Plex, sending himself and his opponent crashing to the mat with authority.
Shannon begins crawling towards the corner where Matt is sticking his hand out for the tag but Bateman gets up and grabs him by the ankle, dragging him away from Matt as Derrick heads over to Johnny and tags him back in. Curtis enters the ring and stands there as Shannon begins crawling towards Matt again, but as soon as he gets close, Johnny grabs him by the ankle and drags him away again. Johnny tags Derrick back in who does the same thing except this time, when Bateman goes to stop Shannon, he rolls over onto his back and kicks Derrick in the face, sending Bateman staggering backward into his corner as Shannon tags in Matt Hardy.
"Are you okay, bro? Did he hurt your bread and butter?" asks a concerned Johnny as Derrick just nods and informs him,
"They might be stronger than you thought. I mean he just tagged Matt in, they say this guy's stronger than death." Matt is not willing to play along with the shenanigans of the Double Dragons' stalling as he runs over to their corner and delivers a stiff knee to the abdomen of Derrick Bateman. Johnny goes to say something to Matt but Matt just punches him, knocking him off of the apron. Derrick is holding his abdomen coughing as Matt stands him up in the corner and delivers a knife edge chop across his chest. The crowd, "WOOOOOOOOO"'s as Matt winds back and connects with another, causing Bateman to wince in pain. Matt winds back again but this time puts no delay between them as he lights into Derrick's chest with a rapid succession of knife edge chops.
Mick Foley: It seems like Bateman is no match for Matt Hardy.
Joey Styles: Knocking off the number one contenders would certainly be a big win for Hardy and Moore.
Mick Foley: Team Mattitude.
Joey Styles: Did you just correct me?
Mick Foley: Well, yeah, but only because they actually have a team name. When you refer to them as Matt and Shannon or Hardy and Moore, you make them sound like to singles guys that management randomly threw together.
Joey Styles: You mean like they did with you and The Rock?
Mick Foley: My name's not Sock.
Joey Styles: It's like having Striker out here.
Mick Foley: Be careful what you wish for.
Joey Styles: Or I just might get it? Thank you, Mick, that's very prophetic.
Mick Foley: No I mean be careful what you wish for, that's him in the ring.
Mick's right as Matt is standing inside the ring with his hands on his hips as he heroically dons a Superman costume. Striker grabs Hardy by the shoulder and spins him around, as the two have a staredown, Hardy looking puzzled and Striker looking like a goof. Matt's about to hit the former commentator when Bateman connects with a bulldog, Striker leaping back so that he doesn't get caught in the crossfire.
"Cool costume, bro." says Bateman, prompting a proud smile to appear on Striker's face. Derrick walks over to his corner where his tag team partner is returning to the apron as Derrick tags him in but when he enters the ring everyone in the crowd collectively gasp in marvel as they behold that it is not Johnny Curtis, but Fandango.
Joey Styles: No! No! No! Make the circus act stop! This was supposed to go away! No!
Mick Foley: I don't quite get what you're so upset about it, Joey.
Joey Styles: The Rock name dropped Derrick and made fun of his last name in a recent promo, so these idiots think they're Batman and Robin. Johnny also believes he's a Super Saiyan and has access to energy attacks like the Kamehameha Wave and the Spirit Bomb while Derrick believes himself to have super strength and have access to the Kaioken Attack. Fandango is Johnny's supposed transformed state.
Mick Foley: It's like you crammed months of storyline development into a few sentences.
Joey Styles: Isn't it?
Hardy looks across the ring and can't believe what he's seeing, then gets in a fighting stance, ready for Fandango to come after him. Meanwhile Matt Striker goes after him but before he can hit him, Shannon Moore grabs his cape and pulls him backward to the mat, dragging him out of the ring and beginning to stomp on him. In the ring, Fandango and Hardy begin to circle each other, Fandango moving rhythmically and Matt looking for a fight. Fandango stops and throws his arms out to his sides, pointing at his body and shouting,
"Say it with me! Faaaaaaan.....Daaaaaaan....Goooooooo!" inspiring cheers from the crowd.Matt responds to him, "Oh yeah? You think you're the only one that can do that? I'm Veeeeeeeeeeeeee Oooooonnnnnnneeeee, baby!" as he throws up the V1 sign, which startles Bateman from the apron as he cries out to his partner,
"Fandango, look out bro, he's a Vulcan!"
Fandango whips his head around in disbelief, then looks back at Matt who kicks him in the stomach and brings him in, motioning to the crowd that it's time for the
Twist of Fate. Matt spins but Fandango pushes him into the ropes and as Matt staggers backward, Fandango rolls him up for the pin attempt as the referee counts.
ONE!
...
TWO!
NO!
Matt kicks out of it as he returns to a vertical base and he and Fandango begin circling one another again.
Joey Styles: This has dissolved into ridicule of tag team wrestling. Someone make the pain stop.
"BEER....MONEYYYYYYY!"
[video=youtube;CrJenfct9r0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrJenfct9r0[/video]
"Take A Fall" begins playing as the team of Robert Roode and James Storm rush the ring, Roode clotheslining Fandango to the mat and Storm clotheslining Matt. The bell rings signifying the end of the match as both men double team Hardy and Fandango. Bateman, Moore, and Matt Striker enter the ring to try and even the numbers as Storm and Roode look at one another and laugh, Storm hitting Matt Striker with the
Last Call and Roode planting Moore on top of Hardy with a spinebuster. Bateman goes after both men but they grab him and lay him out with the
DWI.
Christy Hemme: Ladies and gentlemen, as the result of a double disqualification, this match has been ruled a No Contest!
The fans boo as Beer Money stand over Team Mattitude and the Modern Day Double Dragons proudly.
Mick Foley: This is sick. Do you see what wishing gets you?
Joey Styles: Beer Money getting involved is just them putting the roster on notice.
Mick Foley: Whatever you need to say to justify it to yourself. Let's go to commercial.
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COMMERCIAL FIVE
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Joey Styles: Welcome back to Anarchy folks, and what a debut edition we've had tonight.
Mick Foley: We've gotten off to a great start here on Wednesday nights, Joey, I'm already excited for next week.
Joey Styles: As am I, Mick, but before we get there we've got an explosive main event.
Mick Foley: A match that, as I understand, has been given a stipulation in honor of the new gritty and violent approach, right?
Joey Styles: Right you are, Mick.
The camera pans to the ring for the final time of the evening.
Christy Hemme: The following contest is your Anarchy main event and it is a No Disqualification match! Introducing first...
As the tribal music begins to play, the "Samoan Bulldozer" wastes no time as he appears from behind the curtain with Trish Stratus walking closely alongside him as the two make their way to the ring quickly, both with a sour look on their faces given what happened at Wrestlemania.
Joey Styles: What a monster this Umaga is, Mick, I was worried about the brutality of this match-up when it was a regular singles match but Extreme Rules? This is going to be a bloodbath!
Mick Foley: Ever notice how, even when angry, Trish still manages to look absolutely gorgeous?
Joey Styles: Easy Mick, I'm sure your wife is watching, and The Rock, I wouldn't want to piss off either if I were you.
Trish remains at ringside as Umaga enters the ring, anxiously awaiting the contest to begin.
Christy Hemme: From the Isle of Samoa. Weighing in at three hundred and fifty pounds. The "Samoan Bulldozer", Umaga!
Umaga snarls as Christy gets ready to introduce his adversary.
Christy Hemme: And the opponent...
Rhino's theme, 'War Machine' by Kiss begins to play, the famous riff playing over the snapping snare drum before finally the the drum fill plays and the theme kicks into full swing. Rhino emerges from the back alone, no Coach tonight, as lyrics are belted out through the audio system Rhino marches down to the ring the International Championship wrapped tightly around his waist.
Joey Styles: Ya know, Rhino's title reign has been called underwhelming by some, but it doesn't seem to be affecting him that much.
Mick Foley: Ever notice how, even when angry, Trish still manages to look absolutely gorgeous?
Joey Styles: Focus, Mick, we're talking about Rhino now.
Mick Foley: Oh, right. Sorry, Joey. Rhino looks intense tonight.
He makes the run at the bottom of the ramp and slides into the ring, he walks straight past Sting taking time to glare into his eyes before he heads to the top rope and unwraps the title proceeding to beat his chest and throw both hands into the air with the title belt in one hand and the other a clenched fist. Rhino lets out a primal roar as the crowd too roar with approval before stepping down for his introduction.
Christy Hemme: From Detroit, Michigan. Weighing in at two hundred and seventy pounds. He is the UWF International Champion, the "War Machine" Rhino!
The bell rings as both men are ready for the main event to get underway.
VS.
Umaga wastes no time getting things started as he charges across the ring and collides with Rhino, his shoulder hitting the champ in the jaw as he is knocked to the mat. Umaga goes for an elbow drop but Rhino rolls out of the way and gets to his feet, going for a stomp on the downed Umaga but the "Samoan Bulldozer" rolls out of the way to avoid it and pushes himself to a vertical base, charging Rhino and taking a wide swing with his left fist, but Rhino ducks it and connects with Umaga's stomach with a right. Umaga headbutts Rhino in the top of the head and hooks his head, lifting him into a delayed vertical suplex but Rhino swings through with his legs and gets free, landing behind Umaga as he pushes him into the nearest corner.
Umaga catches himself as Rhino goes for a running elbow but Umaga leaps out of the corner and Rhino hits nothing but turnbuckle as Umaga grabs his head and drives it toward the turnbuckle pad, but Rhino blocks it with his hand and grabs Umaga's head, driving his head toward the turnbuckle pad but Umaga kicks Rhino in the back of his leg, sweeping him off balance as he hits the mat hard. Umaga goes for another elbow drop but Rhino rolls out of the ring under the bottom rope, causing Umaga to hit nothing but canvas as Rhino slides back into the ring and dives on him, lighting into his head with several quick punches before Umaga manages to get inside the offense and press his thumb to Rhino's adam's apple, distracting Rhino so that he can reverse the situation and begin lighting into the "War Machine" with quick punches of his own.
After about five strikes, Umaga relents and returns to a vertical base but as Rhino sits up, he grabs the back of his head with his right hand and hits him in the face with his right knee as Rhino's head turns and rocks with the impact. Rhino reacts by grabbing Umaga's leg before he can draw it back and flips him off of his balance, causing him to hit the mat hard, connecting with his upper back first. Rhino gets to his feet, blood running from his nose, as he grabs Umaga's legs and pulls them upward as he falls backward onto his back, launching Umaga through the air as he goes over the top rope to the outside of the ring, but manages to stick the landing and wind up safely on his feet as he turns to face his opponent, but this time flips up the ring apron instead of re-entering the ring itself.
Joey Styles: It looks like weapons are going to come into play already, Mick.
Mick Foley: Well the fact that Rhino's already been busted open is a testament to how personal this is.
Umaga flips the apron back down, having obtained his weapon of choice as he holds it up, revealing a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire, as he slides into the ring where Rhino is waiting for him, attacking his opponent immediately with stomps to the upper back with his right leg but that proves foolish as it leaves his left leg upon as Umaga swings the weapon with his right hand, catching Rhino in the leg. The "War Machine" grabs where he's been struck as Umaga stands up and brings the weapon down, striking Rhino in the top of the head as Rhino now holds there, staggering back into the nearest corner. Umaga charges, holding the weapon out like it's a javelin, but before impact is made Rhino sidesteps and Umaga hits the corner padding chest first as the bat falls through the ropes to the outside of the ring.
Trish picks it up and throws it through the air, meaning it for Umaga but Rhino catches it and swings it directly at the back of Umaga, who gets knocked into the corner chest first again. Rhino lays into Umaga's back with three more good swings and then throws it to the mat, grabbing Umaga and hitting him with a side Russian Leg Sweep that causes the back of his head to connect with the barbed wire. Rhino gets up and grabs Umaga by the dreads, pulling him to his feet as the "War Machine" places his opponent's head between his legs, setting up for the piledriver, but Umaga grabs his thighs and throws him over his head so that as Umaga returns to a vertical base, Rhino lands back and neck first on the barbed wire. Rhino sits up and climbs to his feet but as he turns, Umaga hits him with a
Gore!
Joey Styles: Oh my!
Mick Foley: And now it's been kicked into overdrive on the no love lost.
Umaga stands up and steps through the ropes, dropping to the floor as he grabs Rhino by the leg, pulling him over to the ring post as he grabs his leg and slams it against the post before pulling Rhino out of the ring violently, allowing him to hit the floor hard. Umaga goes to follow up but Rhino rolls and punches Umaga in the groin, then palms his head and drives it backward into the ring post. Rhino releases his hold after impact is made as Umaga responds by charging him and clotheslining him over the ring barricade. Umaga goes to follow him into the crowd but Rhino pops up and hits him in the top of the head with a steel chair, causing Umaga to stagger a bit. Rhino climbs onto the ring barricade and swings with the chair again but Umaga throws an uppercut, knocking the chair into Rhino's face as he falls off the barricade, hitting the concrete floor amongst the crowd hard. Umaga climbs over the barricade, the chair in hand, as he turns it upside down in his hands and drives it downward, sandwiching Rhino's ankle between it and the concrete.
Umaga takes a few more quick hits like that before moving forward and hitting Rhino square in the chest in the same fashion. Rhino begins crawling backward away from Umaga who raises the chair high in the air. Umaga swings it downward as Rhino rolls out of the way, pushing himself to his feet as he staggers backward trying to keep his balance and now finds himself standing behind his opponent. As Umaga turns to face him, Rhino grabs a bucket of popcorn out of the hands of one of the fans standing next to him and throws it in Umaga's face. As Umaga clutches at his now hot and buttery face, Rhino charges at him and hits him in the face with the cardboard bucket, which is enough to take Umaga off his feet because of the way he was angled as he clutched at his face.
Rhino threw down the crumpled bucket and grabbed the steel chair that Umaga dropped, walking over and unfolding it slightly as he placed Umaga's head through the opening and climbed a higher barricade, climbing onto the concrete barrier above the "EXIT" sign as the crowd is going nuts. Before Rhino can go forward with the attack, he feels a tap on his shoulder. As he turns to see who it is, Trish Stratus kicks him directly in the groin as Rhino falls to his knees. Trish places her foot on Rhino's back and pushes then as the "War Machine" goes tumbling forward.
Joey Styles: OH NO!
Rhino manages to flip so that he hits back first, but it's still a doozy of a fall as the pain can be seen in his face. Umaga sits up and then rises to his feet angrily, grabbing the sides of the chair at both sides of his neck and pushing away from himself, breaking the chair as the pieces fall to the ground and Umaga clutches the seat of it in his hands. He charges towards Rhino and looks to swing it down towards his face but the "War Machine" places a foot on his abdomen and monkey flips him so that Umaga hits himself with it and finds himself in a seated position, the downed Rhino's head at his lower back. Rhino sits up and manages to get to his feet as he limps towards Umaga, who is climbing to his feet, unaware of what's happening behind him.
Rhino spins Umaga around and headbutts him, hoping to further daze his opponent but it only seems to anger the "Samoan Bulldozer" as he returns the favor with gusto, knocking Rhino to the ground as he rolls backward, his legs going over his head as he ends up flat on his stomach. Umaga grabs him by the hair and drags him through the crowd, back to the ringside barricade, as he pulls Rhino up to a vertical base, who clotheslines Umaga and sends both of them tumbling to the floor back at ringside. Rhino crawls along the ground and arrives at the steel steps, using them for leverage as he gradually climbs to his feet. Umaga rolls over onto his stomach and begins crawling towards the ring, using the apron for leverage as he uses it to pull himself up.
Mick Foley: Both of these men have thrown so much at each other in such a short period of time, the wear and tear of the war is showing.
Umaga slides into the ring and lies there as Rhino does the same, both men beaten and bleeding. Suddenly...
"LOOK IN MY EYES!
...
WHAT DO YOU SEE?"
[video=youtube;oq4Lbe_Vl5w]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oq4Lbe_Vl5w&feature=player_embedded[/video]
Joey Styles: Oh what is this?
CM Punk comes running down the ramp and slides into the ring, going straight for Rhino as he dives on him and begins lighting into him with a flurry of punches as the crowd boos this viciously. But it isn't long before the cavalry arrives, because...
Mick Foley: The "Olympic Hero"!
Joey Styles: Kurt Angle's coming to get him some!
Kurt comes running down the ramp and slides into the ring as he goes after Punk, grabbing him and connecting with an
Angle Slam! As Kurt spins around and sends the crowd into a frenzy, Trish slides into the ring and hits him with a low blow, sending him crumpling to the mat as the crowd boos intensely. Umaga, seemingly on a second wind from the carnage, grabs Kurt by the throat and pulls him to his feet, throwing him through the air into the corner as he takes off running, sandwiching Kurt in the corner and sending him over the turnbuckle to the outside of the ring. Rhino spins Umaga around and goes to strike him but he gets spun around and Punk catches him in the head with an enziguiri that knocks him down as Punk and Umaga stomp on Rhino.
Joey Styles: This is ridiculous! I know it's No Disqualification but come on!
Mick Foley: Get up, Kurt!
As the numbers game is in favor of the heels, suddenly the lights go out and the crowd erupts into a cheering frenzy as they anticipate who may be on their way.
Mick Foley: Who's this?
As the lights come back on, the crowd goes absolutely ballistic as Raven is standing behind CM Punk with a Singapore Cane in hand. Punk turns around and Raven swats him across the face with it, knocking him down. The roof is coming off of the IZOD Center as Raven hits Umaga in the top of the head, knocking the "Samoan Bulldozer" to the mat. Trish enters the fray but Raven hits her in the stomach with the cane and then throws it down and hits her with an
Evenflow DDT! As Umaga goes after Raven, Rhino charges across the ring and cuts him down with a
Gore! The whole arena seems to pop as Rhino hooks the leg and everyone counts along with the referee.
ONE!
...
TWO!
...
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Christy Hemme: Here is your winner, the UWF International Champion Rhino!
Rhino heads to the nearest turnbuckle and poses with his championship as the crowd cheers for both him and Raven.
Joey Styles: This is completely unexpected! Raven is back in UWF, he's on Anarchy, and he came to the aid of his friend the "War Machine."
Rhino steps down from the turnbuckle as he turns to thank Raven personally, but as he does, Raven kicks him in the gut and hits him with an
Evenflow DDT!
Joey Styles: What the hell was that for?
Mick Foley: Oh I can't wait until next week now. Until then, goodnight folks!
Raven standing in the ring is the last image fans see as UWF Anarchy fades to black.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
CREDITS
Taz promo-
Aniking
Hawkins vs. Taz, Angle vs. Ryback-
Sam
Everything else-
Chris Dresden
CONFIRMED FOR MONEY IN THE BANK
UWF International Championship
Rhino(c) vs. CM Punk vs. Kurt Angle
Loved the ending how Rollins uses a Scorpion Death Drop; could this be a sign of things to come?
Curtis/Bateman is a great pairing to have in E-Feds, always a good laugh.
2:
:
:
::lesnar:
