Dating Advice - How to get the monkey of your back

[Ovaldinho]

I wouldn't get to offended by the lad, sure he comes off as a bellend to some, but I think it's great to read and laugh at.

But yeah, I used this advice and got laid by Tgimveld's mum, because I'm jaded and frivellous lad me

 

[Nick]

Being a nerd is a good thing actually. Skinny and straight egge though?, trust me the women dont want that in their beds. I cannot believe you get fanny

all women have to do is stay in shape, and be less forward.

i get pussy shaking their rumps on me all the time, a bit more relaxed please ladies.

SHES FAT! :steiner:

 

[B.Dazzle]

I look like this:

I never have to worry about not getting Pie, because I get more pie in an hour than you all get in a lifetime combined.

 

[Tgmiveld]

SHES FAT! :steiner:

i did once date a fat women, she stunk of B.O and has bad breath

I sacked her of the first chance I got, bloody con job

 

[Farooq]

I used TG's advice and got some fanny last night.

 

[Crankdeer]

I used TG's advice and got some fanny last night.

Did you get the whole fanny pack or just the fanny?

 

[Farooq]

Did you get the whole fanny pack or just the fanny?

Fanny packs with extra side of fanny sauce

 

[Crankdeer]

Fanny packs with extra side of fanny sauce

How fanny of you.

 

[Tgmiveld]

I used TG's advice and got some fanny last night.

good jubbly

 

[Tgmiveld]

this is the sort of physicque a lad can get away with

 

[Tgmiveld]

if we take away the mullet, the guy above is a decent look. women like that sort of attitude

more good looks

- Dwight schrute

- Mariyln Manson

- Trent Reznor

- Sean Lock

 

[Grams and Ounces]

Alright lads

I notice some of you struggle with the old women. As you are still young, I thought I would throw some of my advice your way.

1. Dont give a shiny shit

Women do not like lads who express feelings, or make an effort. They want lads to be blokes. So, act jaded towards everything, and you will have fanny on all fours. What happened to the day that women looked good for us men. The fact is, a bloke should be a bloke. A hairty chest is the difference between a man and a women, if you shave your chest you might as well be a bloody women. Men should not wash too much, it takes away the manly musk that attract women

2. Big Words

Friverouus and Vacous are 2 words I use to prove my smarts to the lasses. Forget your fancy degree's or a career, it is big words and what music you like that is a sign of smarts. Also put some NIN on, women love smart music they will think you are smart and cool if you like NIN, trust me lads. Dont follow a career, it might be a sign you care too much.

3. Be a bigger built lad, and develop a manly image mixed with a nerdy tint

Women want a lad who is bigger built, not fat but with some prime hairy meat on them. I have glasses and big teeth so people think I am a nerd,but luckily women like that look. If you find the balance you will get prime poontang pie

Carry yourself like a big built lad, practice walking across the room, women love a proper bloke.

Dreadlocks, beards and tatoos are all good for getting the old fanny

4. Local Boozer

Women live to be in the boozer, take her there and they will make their move on you if you conform to the 3 rule I gave above.

they usually doing this by shaking their rump's in your crotch I find.

That is it, this is what works for me. Now run it through your greymatter

Like you.

Like your advice.

Bird getting more friendly than frisky. Need to turn it around. Any tips.

 

[Tgmiveld]

Like you.

Like your advice.

Bird getting more friendly than frisky. Need to turn it around. Any tips.

act indifferent like you dont give a shit

start listening to Nin and make her know that, and use a few big words around her

 

[Grams and Ounces]

act indifferent like you dont give a shit

start listening to Nin and make her know that, and use a few big words around her

Happy days already done the first part.

Going the boozer tomorrow, or later depending on your pov.

Will get my thesaurus out before hand. Can't promise on the NIN though Ozzy is about as heavy as i get,.

 

[Aids Johnson]

Alright lads

I notice some of you struggle with the old women. As you are still young, I thought I would throw some of my advice your way.

1. Dont give a shiny shit

Women do not like lads who express feelings, or make an effort. They want lads to be blokes. So, act jaded towards everything, and you will have fanny on all fours. What happened to the day that women looked good for us men. The fact is, a bloke should be a bloke. A hairty chest is the difference between a man and a women, if you shave your chest you might as well be a bloody women. Men should not wash too much, it takes away the manly musk that attract women

2. Big Words

Friverouus and Vacous are 2 words I use to prove my smarts to the lasses. Forget your fancy degree's or a career, it is big words and what music you like that is a sign of smarts. Also put some NIN on, women love smart music they will think you are smart and cool if you like NIN, trust me lads. Dont follow a career, it might be a sign you care too much.

3. Be a bigger built lad, and develop a manly image mixed with a nerdy tint

Women want a lad who is bigger built, not fat but with some prime hairy meat on them. I have glasses and big teeth so people think I am a nerd,but luckily women like that look. If you find the balance you will get prime poontang pie

Carry yourself like a big built lad, practice walking across the room, women love a proper bloke.

Dreadlocks, beards and tatoos are all good for getting the old fanny

4. Local Boozer

Women live to be in the boozer, take her there and they will make their move on you if you conform to the 3 rule I gave above.

they usually doing this by shaking their rump's in your crotch I find.

That is it, this is what works for me. Now run it through your greymatter

Shh smurf.

Alright, what you want to do is admit that you listen to boy bands circa 1999 (when you were 13) and that you want to find a guy who is likeminded with interests in things he also pretends to be ashamed of. You now need to shave your chesticles, bring kleenex and eyedrops (lubricant) and paint your eyes to look like your favorite star from the wonder years, Marilyn Manson.

Now when this is done, just google backstreet boys; dress the opposite and ask him to tell you what to do now, when he wants you back.