so bill parcells was formally introduced today as assistant coach of the downtown chuckers. the introduction and press conference took place outside chucker coliseum, and it was attended by swarming media, fans, and plenty of trees. when somebody like the big tuna reaches out to be apart of the staff, even if his background consists mainly of football, u gotta jump at the opportunity. his job will be to serve mostly as motivator, but he'll also help me out with the x's, and o's(cheetos). i can only have so many. justin reed will also be back as my other assistant, and will be serving his usual highly important, critical role of defensive coach, and drug supplier for the team. parcells and reed combination is already being touted as a lethal tandem with the knowledge, and efficiency they possess, and alongside myself as the coach/general manager, are a lock to be the GOAT coaching staff.
