Well if anything I am TOO respectful. I don't bend over backwards for them (anymore), because damn, I have a spine. But my second text to a girl I just met is not "let's have a drink sometime" either. It will be after like a week or two.
And then sometimes I mean well and they take offense. For example I was doing really well with a girl a while back and then one day I went to the same town she was going to, and said: "hey let's meet". She said OK and that she was on her way with a friend. So I said "bring your friend along if you want to make it less awkward". And that was the last I heard of her. I meant awkward BECAUSE IT WAS A BLOODY FIRST DATE, and I'm a nerd. I meant no insult, but she was obviously offended.
Also, I don't mind them saying "I like guys who are tall", therefore I am not their type because I'm on the short side of average. Likewise blond guys, guys with tattoos, etc. That's their prerogative. But if they said they're tired of getting rude comments or getting played and then after I'm nice they rebuff me... Or if they play the "lesbian" card when it's obviously not true just to get rid of me (as has happened TWICE now)...hell, just tell me I'm an ugly nerd, whatever. Don't fucking lie to me. Or when they tell me "my friend likes you" only for it to be bullshit...that's what I hate.
I no longer lack confidence (no more than any normal person my age). I know my strenghts, weaknesses, admit to my flaws, and try to work with the body and features I have to be as presentable as possible. I think I'm successful. But it's like, for most women, the fact that I'm not 6'3'' and built like Batista is an elimination factor. If it is, fair enough - but don't act like it isn't. Know what I'm sayin'?