"Invincible" you say? (WMXXVIII Review)

[We Are Legion]

Finally able to write a column again after an arduous move to a different country, but hey, what can you do? SAL's work is awesome and all, but I couldn't let him go on hogging the section all to himself Not sure if this is the right place to complain about the new layout of this section, but what the hell, it SUCKS. Not even quick links on the home page anymore, who's booking this crap?

For the record, Montréal bars are a great place to watch wrestling ppv's. Might have to make that routine. The nachos could definitely use some work, but maybe that just means Canada needs more Mexicans in general. Seriously, nobody knows what a tamale is up here, it's friggin weird.

Anyway, it probably took you longer to read that little intro bit I just typed than it took to watch Wrestlemania's first match. In fact, when I got home from the bar, the first thing I did was log on to read the reactions specifically from that match for sheer lulz purposes. What could I possibly say that hasn't been said? Why even bother get into it? Could I possibly drop more F bombs describing it than most people do? Pretty certain I could, but I'll be different than other critics by actually keeping it clean, which is actually pretty challenging.

World Heavyweight Championship - Daniel Bryan v. Sheamus: Daniel Bryan gets kicked in the head and loses immediately. The end.

Let me start off by saying I've never... ever... liked world championship title matches starting a ppv, especially when the match ends like that. The only ppv I would probably make an exception for is Elimination Chamber because the EC matches consume a lot of time and watching two back-to-back takes a bit of the flavor out of the 2nd one. However... *ahem*... this is WRESTLEFRIGGINMANIA. Just because the card has Cena v. Rock, that doesn't automatically make the World Heavyweight Championship a curtain-jerking affair. Especially when it involves the Royal Rumble winner.

I had very high expectations for this match, though there's nothing you could have told me in advance that would lead me to believe Daniel Bryan had a snowball's chance in hell of leaving Miami with the title. That's very much beside the point though. I thought it was hilarious when Chavo Guerrero was squashed my Kane at Wrestlemania XXIV, but there's two glaring differences between that match and Sheamus/Bryan. Number 1, as mentioned before, the World Heavyweight Championship is at stake. That is supposed to be a considerable "big deal", you know? Correct me if I'm wrong. And 2, it wasn't CHAVO v. KANE. Sheamus has been getting seriously pushed since long before his humongous Royal Rumble win and Daniel Bryan could have at least went out with a bang after showcasing his bottomless arsenal of wrestling ability on a stage the guy has deserved to be on since before even coming to the WWE. I don't want to hear the excuses and "oh it's okay, Daniel Bryan will have his Mania moment eventually" nonsense. Sheamus doesn't even come away from the match looking like a superhuman stud, the only thing that was accomplished was Daniel Bryan looking like a tremendous idiot. WWE cheated the fans and cheated themselves with that call. Not a great way to start off the ppv considering a lot of fans were probably just hoping nothing else would suck nearly as bad as that, and they still had Maria Menounos to look forward to.

"We got nothing else for either of you" - Randy Orton v. Kane: Okay, I know what you're thinking. How could anyone possibly expect anything special out of these two wrestlers considering neither of them have ever been known to put on any "puro wrestling clinics". I honestly couldn't even type that with a straight face. Unsurprisingly, the match was extremely boring. Miraculously, even more boring than their inpromptu rivalry. This was a match that probably should have been no-holds-barred for the sake of making it more interesting, but unfortunately, there's a Hell in a Cell match later on the card. What's the point?

Despite how utterly uninteresting the match was, I was actually pleasantly surprised to see Kane win. What's even more interesting is that he won cleanly. I was glad to see Kane get the rub because the guy was, in my opinion, the most solid heel on the entire roster for most of the past year and I was furious that he probably wasn't even going to get a match on the Mania card. It will also be interesting to see where they go with Randy Orton after this. Orton has really just seemed like a nuisance to bookers during Mania season the past few years. It's almost like they're just acknowledging many people are fans of the guy, but... they don't really want to do anything serious with him. Like his presence on the card is nothing more than patronizing the fans. The last guy I remember WWE pushing as hard as they were pushing Orton in 07-09 and just bail completely on was Chris Ben... oops, I mean that's never happened.

In short, the match warrants the skip button on the dvd, but the result will likely make things very interesting for these two wrestlers in coming weeks.

Intercontinental Championship - Cody Rhodes v. Big Show: I honestly didn't have much interest in this match before hand and I wasn't a fan of the outcome either. It was actually pretty comical, and I was trying so hard not to drop to the floor laughing when Big WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION Show hoisted that tiny little belt that was small enough to be his bracelet above his head like he just did something incredible by beating someone 1/3 his size, especially considering how utterly irrelevant the IC championship is these days and what a colossal underachievement it is for someone whose been with the company for 13 years. Michael Cole did a great job at least trying to sell how "prestigious" the title allegedly is with relentless Wrestlemania history lessons. I truly appreciate the effort, Cole and I am totally not being sarcastic.

Since I'm pretty sure this match served no other purpose than to pat Show on the back for all his wonderful jobbing service at the event over the years and Cody will no doubt win the belt back at Extreme Rules, I'm not too disappointed about the match. Though next time WWE wants to reward a hard-working talent, I suggest they at least try.

"Token divas match" - Eve and Beth Phoenix v. Maria "Not really a wrestler" Menounos and Kelly "Not really a wrestler" Kelly: Okay, honestly... it wasn't the worst match on the card simply because it lasted longer than 2 seconds, but aside from one move Kelly Kelly did off the top rope, there's nothing else worth mentioning. Of course the Hollywood celebrity's team wins, and I really want to know who these "Extra" fans are that bought a $60 ppv to see this match. I want to understand how this woman being involved in a match makes any difference whatsoever in ppv buys. I definitely think Beth and Eve's appearance on "Extra" helped a bit, but why does Maria need to actually be in a match? What purpose does that serve? I wonder if someone in WWE really thinks there was a room full of 16-year-old soCal blondes somewhere that actually looked up from their Allure magazines, saw that "challenge" and said, "OH NO SHE DI-IN'T! I'm gonna watch Wrestlemania just to see that bitch get..." well, you get the idea.

"End of an Era Match (Even though there's half a dozen other wrestlers still on the roster from that era) - Undertaker v. Triple H: Say what you want about CM Punk/Jericho, this was definitely my favorite match of the night. It was a thousand times better than their match last year and I'm glad all those less-than-stellar weekly promos actually culminated with something special. The entrances alone were enough to send chills down my spine and even the added focus on the cell lowering just set the mood as perfectly as it possibly could have been. The match could have easily been the Mania main event if Cena/Rock wasn't available and it carried a truly "big fight" vibe.

I was weary of Shawn's involvement in the match and I wasn't sure if his presence was even necessary, but after the match I realized the match could not have worked the same way without him. I still think the hype wasn't handled very well on the Monday Night Raw's leading up to Mania, and I stand by my previous comments that much of it was extremely silly. Thankfully, there was no "screw job" nonsense and Taker reached 20-0.

I already know a lot of people are going to knock on this match for the repeated finishers, but let's be clear about some things before all those ignorant comments start flying... this may very well have been Taker AND Triple H's last match. Taker has 4 finishing moves and Triple H has 1. Be glad you saw enough of them because it might be an extremely long time before you see any of them again. And unlike last year's match, the finishers were definitely not spammed and if you thought you were going to see either of these two men lie down after at least 3 big moves, you are unbelievably delusional. Instead of lessening the perceived devastation of the pedigree, the tombstone piledriver, or Hell's Gate like many criticized their match last year for, the utilization of those moves instead did a better job making both wrestlers look absolutely immortal. Also, the absence of Triple H mocking the Undertaker by performing one of his own finishers again was definitely appreciated. I felt that was a big reason last year's match went overboard into areas of ridiculousness.

One thing I will say that I still don't understand about the match was the need for it to be in a cell. Other than a brief entanglement outside the ring at the beginning of the match with Taker throwing Triple H at the cell walls, the match never seemed like it needed to be inside a cell. Even during the brief period where Shawn Michaels was incapacitated by Taker and a 2nd referee needed to run out and get into the cell quickly to count a pin, nothing during those moments weighed heavily on the outcome of the match and the same effect could have been achieved without it. Don't get me wrong, I like the Hell in a Cell matches and all, I just wish WWE would utilize the actual purpose of it more, which (HISTORY LESSON) in 1997 was created as a way to keep outside interference out of the match, more particularly to keep Triple H and Chyna from interfering in a match between Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. That was also a month before the Metallica album "ReLoad" was released which featured the match's theme song "Memory Remains". Maybe the cell was just for extra nostalgia, who knows.

I had a really weird feeling when the match was over and all three men were standing on the entrance ramp facing the crowd that more than an era was ending. If I was Triple H or Undertaker, that would be an excellent stopping point for either of their outstanding careers.

Team Teddy v. Team Johnny: Honestly, I wasn't too into this match simply because there was no way in hell anything was going to successfully follow Triple H/Taker and I was just waiting for it to be over as soon as it started. What a cluster %$&@ of a match. Most of the time I couldn't tell who the legal man was, but none of that really mattered anyways. The match served 3 purposes; 1. To give Johnny Ace ultimate control and become the new Vince McMahon-type heel, 2. For Eve to ruin everything, kick Ryder in the nuts, and get booed out of the building (since she couldn't really do that earlier in a match no one cared about), and 3. to squeeze more people on the card. I probably would have enjoyed this match more if it was Survivor Series-style elimination rules, but when no one was getting pinned and most everyone wound up outside the ring, I lost interest pretty quickly knowing only one fall was going to conclude this match. It's hard to buy into a match that unbelievable considering there's no way a one-fall-to-a-finish match with that many people on each team would ever realistically end.

Not a horrible match by any means, but could have been better. I definitely expected more considering the stakes and how much the outcome of this match will affect Raw and Smackdown programming.

WWE Championship - CM Punk v. Chris Jericho: Definitely my 2nd favorite match of the evening and this is just about as good as it gets from either of these two outstanding superstars. Jericho was cracking me up all the way during the first few minutes of the matches, relentlessly taunting CM Punk with "Your father's a DRUNK. Your sister's a DRUG ADDICT!" to coax CM Punk into snapping and possibly getting himself disqualified. But as CM Punk fought temptation throughout the entire match, Jericho began to refrain from his mind game tactics and seemed to start believing he could beat CM Punk without a cheap win. Excellent story-telling, and the wrestling quality between these two was by-far the best of the night.

My views on the outcome of the match is a little more complicated. On one hand, Punk deserved the win, and he got it. He had a blockbuster year in 2011 with the whole "Summer of Punk" and really established himself as a guy that could take the ball and should "other plans" arise for Cena. And after the plethora of pyro and fireworks and just the spectacular nature of his entrance before the match, it was a safe bet he was going to win. The stage was practically tailored for Punk to have a big moment that night and it was unquestionably the biggest moment of his career so far.

On the other hand, Jericho losing really hurts WWE's ability to drag this rivalry on. Unlike a lot of rivalries featured at Wrestlemania this year, this is one that I actually want to see a lot more of. I felt it was rushed in the weeks leading up to Wrestlemania and not as much hype was given to this match as there should have been due to the Rock/Cena match taking up at least half an hour of Raw air time every week. Other than Jericho whining and complaining and brown-nosing Johnny Ace to give him a rematch at Extreme Rules, I really don't see way this feud can continue. And frankly, we've seen Jericho continue rivalries this exact same way far too often. I feel Jericho winning would have been one of the most unpredictable curve balls WWE could have thrown at us last night and it would have been easier to continue the rivalry, especially if Jericho had won by cheating. Then the whole "Best in the World" moniker takes on a completely new meaning, Jericho becomes the best in the world at cheating, and Punk gets a rematch at Extreme Rules where cheating doesn't matter. There are so many directions WWE could have taken that, it's a little depressing to think about. And I'm not just saying that because I've been a serious Jericho fan for 15 years, I'm saying that as a WWE fan who likes to see story lines go in unpredictable directions.

Either way, Punk picked up his big win this year, so at least his match next year will be less predictable and we will really have no idea what direction WWE will take with him in 2013. However, I think it's safe to say he's going to be a pretty big deal in 2012.

John Cena v. The Rock: And finally, the main reason 90% of the viewers bought the ppv whether they want to admit it or not is finally here. The only other match on the card that could compare to the vibe of this match was Triple H/Taker, but this was admittedly much greater. MGK walks out to perform "Invincible" prior to John Cena's entrance, not wasting any time whatsoever bringing out the boo birds with that shirt he was wearing. How much more evident can you get that you are certainly NOT from Miami? And like most people in Cleveland, I'm sure he's still a little bitter about that LeBron guy...

To no surprise at all, if there was a roof on that stadium, it most certainly would have caved in from the thunderous boos generated by John Cena's entrance. Good lord. One thing you have to realize is every other place he's got that kind of reception, those arenas had a roofs on them. This negative reaction was probably even louder without the help of stadium echo, and that's... well.

Not sure who this Flo Rida guy is, where he came from, or why anyone likes him, but whatever. I know he sang a verse on a Lady Gaga cd a few years ago, no idea how that propelled him to introducing the friggin Rock at Wrestlemania.

I was certain every single day for the past year after this match was booked that Cena was going to win, but something about Rock's entrance told me he was definitely not there to job. Even the "G.I. Joe" advert running just before his entrance really tipped me off that this match might not be the shoe-in prediction everyone's been thinking. And how many times do you see a wrestler of his stature walk around stage soaking up the atmosphere right before he walks down the ramp to lose one of the biggest matches of his career? Pretty much never.

The match really started rubbing me the wrong way right off the bat when Cena and Rock mimicked the Hogan/Rock stare down from Wrestlemania X8 before the bell sounded. I really wanted to remember that as a moment that only happened once for the rest of my life. I don't care, call it a stupid complaint, but I was really annoyed by that. This wouldn't have felt like an honest review if I didn't mention how much that pissed me off.

I was surprised how Cena's chants got progressively more favorable throughout the course of the match. Then again, the match was much more technical than I thought it was going to be. Cena and Rock taking to the top rope was also something I wasn't expecting to see, but I guess they figured not enough people were doing it that night and there's no way Kelly Kelly should land the sickest high-risk move of the night. I'm certain that was their reasoning and I fully agree.

Nothing about this match was anything wrestling fans haven't seen before other than the fact it was these two particular people wrestling, but the crowd definitely woke up for the match and was fully engaged in it throughout. There were times I couldn't even understand what was being chanted, probably because more than one chant was going, but that's how crazy that place was.

I can understand how a match of this magnitude would make it difficult to decide on a proper finishing sequence, but Cena being arrogant and it costing him the match was something completely out of left field. When has that ever happened before? There's no way that should be something WWE doesn't run with. Often times I look too deep into things like this, it turns out to be nothing more than shoddy booking, so as far as I'm concerned, the verdict is still out on this finish. Rock picking up the win is... unbelievable. Especially considering his relatively inactive status with WWE and Cena being the biggest star in the company. Like most fans it seems, the first thing I thought was "Cena is turning heel on Raw tomorrow night." but every other time this has seemed like possibility after Cena loses a big match, Cena walks out the next day with all smiles and cheap crowd pops and it never happens. I would like to think this time is different and this is a loss that changes Cena. I guess we'll have to wait and see. If that is indeed the case, CM Punk better be ready to run with the ball because there is no one else it's going to.

Overall, I enjoyed this ppv more than last year's but I still think Wrestlemania is lacking to some degree in recent years. I feel too much hype is given to too few matches and the other half of the card suffers as a result. I'm not saying every rivalry on the card should warrant it's own ppv, but there shouldn't be so many matches I don't care about. There are a number of ways WWE could fix this and it would be pointless throwing a ton of suggestions out, but considering it's a homecoming at next year's event, I hope they're firing on all cylinders like Wrestlemania should be and not only banking the buys on 1 or 2 matches. I remember leading into Wrestlemania XIV, the match on the card I was looking forward to the most besides Austin/HBK was Triple H/Owen Hart for the European Championship. THAT'S what I'm talking about.

 

[Ryan]

I thought overall this was a pretty solid PPV. I thought Punk/Jericho was the best match but Taker/HHH was second best. Rock/Cena was good but I've seen much better from The Rock. I did like how MGK and Flo Rida came out and did short performances. If you lived in America, you'd absolutely know who Flo Rida is. He's basically one of the biggest radio hits of the past few years plus he's from Miami. I guess Pitbull wasn't in town.

 

[We Are Legion]

I moved to Montréal from Dallas, and I've heard of him. I just don't like his style or really understand why he's such a big deal. His performance seriously almost put me to sleep and I didn't think it fit The Rock's image.

I liked the idea of the performances before the entrances, but Flo Rida just threw me off.

Pitbull was actually here in MTL a couple nights ago believe it or not, it's funny you said that.

 

[PHX]

I was curious to see why you thought Jericho should have won besides you liking him more than Punk and that is actually a valid reason. However think it was more important to make sure Punk's reign keeps going strong since it's been a minute since we've had the title not be hot shotted around and he is in a good position to carry it for even more months which will only help the title look better and Punk look better. They can find another way for Jericho to get a rematch if need be if they wanna keep the feud going.

As for Cena I feel it more now than ever that they are going to at the very least seriously tease Cena becoming heel. It needs to happen because you have Punk who you can run with as the undisputed number one face of the company and right now I can't think of a time period in WWE where they don't have one heel who you can point to and say he is the number 1 heel in the WWE. They need a top heel bad and fast and Cena will more than enough fill that void in which I hope ultimately down the line would lead to a Punk/Cena feud again this time with a clear face and heel.

 

[We Are Legion]

I was curious to see why you thought Jericho should have won besides you liking him more than Punk and that is actually a valid reason. However think it was more important to make sure Punk's reign keeps going strong since it's been a minute since we've had the title not be hot shotted around and he is in a good position to carry it for even more months which will only help the title look better and Punk look better. They can find another way for Jericho to get a rematch if need be if they wanna keep the feud going.

As for Cena I feel it more now than ever that they are going to at the very least seriously tease Cena becoming heel. It needs to happen because you have Punk who you can run with as the undisputed number one face of the company and right now I can't think of a time period in WWE where they don't have one heel who you can point to and say he is the number 1 heel in the WWE. They need a top heel bad and fast and Cena will more than enough fill that void in which I hope ultimately down the line would lead to a Punk/Cena feud again this time with a clear face and heel.

As much as I like Jericho, I really don't have any problem with him losing as long as it makes sense. I never liked the idea of him coming back just to be Mania fodder for CM Punk because that usually leads Jericho right back to the midcard. I'm sure they will find a way to continue the rivalry for at least another month, but as I said, it will likely just involve Jericho bitching and moaning until he gets an undeserved rematch. He did that exact same thing with Cena like 100 times. But I definitely see how CM Punk getting that huge win was necessary, especially if Cena turns heel.

As for Cena, if WWE doesn't turn him heel after this, they never will. There will never be a better opportunity. I doubt it will happen tonight on Raw, but maybe, I dunno, costing CM Punk or Sheamus their championship Bash at the Beach-style would be a good way to etch it in stone. Even before his entrance, MGK's whole set-up seemed a little heel'ish, he seemed to be deliberately pissing off the crowd with what he was saying and even that shirt he was wearing. He was getting booed before he even opened his mouth. Even some of those vignettes of fans talking about how much they hate Cena, I mean come on... how can that NOT be the direction they want to head?

 

[PHX]

Due to Jericho's lack of main event cred I wanted Punk to face someone like Triple H at mania and beat him to solidify his top face status personally.

Agreed everyone has been always been moaning about turn him heel but it never truly made sense to do it until now. This is the perfect chance to do it and everything lines up right. If they don't do it here then guess he'll be face for the rest of his life.

 

[~Fallen Angel~]

I agree with your review although; I like Flo Rida's music and have been aware of who he is for a very long time. Tonight I get a good feeling....yeah....ANYWAY, I agree with your review; however Jericho/Punk was the best match of the night for me. Although Taker/HHH was definitely great and emotional, I felt that adding the steel cage to the match was pointless. I expected a lot of blood and tossing around but that wasn't the case which is fine. It was still a good match nonetheless and I was glad to see Taker win. As for Jericho/Punk, these two guys proved to be two of the best wrestlers in the company. I was hoping that Jericho would win because I wanted to see the feud continue. Yes, I absolutely love this feud! It's okay though, Jericho attacked Punk on Raw so I am sure their rivalry will continue. I hope Jericho wins the rematch at Extreme Rules.

As for the other matches, Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus was complete bullshit. I did not expect Daniel Bryan to win but I was looking forward to a very good match. The minute they announced that the heavyweight title for the first match, I had a bad feeling about it and boy was I right. It's very unfortunate because Daniel Bryan is definitely too good to lose in that capacity. It was great to hear "yes" chants though. That was the only good thing about the match.

The Rock vs. Cena was a lot better than I expected. It was great to see both of these men on the top rope. Neither of them are known for doing cross bodies or any other "high flying moves." It was definitely my third favorite match of the night. I felt a little bad for Cena though. The fans booed the hell out of him! Oh and The Rock has proven why he is the most electrifying man in sports entertainment. That match was so energetic which made the match so entertaining.

As for the other matches, there isn't much to comment on. Kane vs. Orton was boring, the divas match was boring and Teddy vs. John's team was pretty bad too (hard to keep track of).

Generally though, it was a solid pay per view.

Due to Jericho's lack of main event cred I wanted Punk to face someone like Triple H at mania and beat him to solidify his top face status personally.

I am glad that Punk faced Jericho rather than Triple H. Punk and Jericho put on a memorable match as did Taker and Triple H.

 

[PHX]

I mean I'm glad for the match from a match quality standpoint for sure so don't regret it but same time if they wanted to give Punk a huge mania moment then if they could have stretched out the HHH/Punk feud to where mania would have been their PPV match then it could have been huge for Punk and the build might have not been as half assed as they sadly did with Punk/Jericho. Expecting the second half of the feud to be better though for some reason.

 

[AF.]

Good review and thoughts. Pretty much agree with everything you said. I wasn't feeling the Rock/Cena staredown much like yourself. If they pressed heads together and showed intensity, I would have marked like a bitch.

HHH/Taker was probably my favourite match of the night, but I'm going to wait a month or two, rewatch the event then come to my final conclusions. As it stands, 2 great matches, a good main event and a pretty bad undercard. A good WrestleMania though. I'm certainly not complaining after the travesty that was WrestleMania 27.