Girls & Relationships

[Moonlight Drive]

From what I can see, you owe no appology in this one.

I agree, but in my experience it's often better to do so in this situation.

 

[Nancy Di Loreto]

I agree, but in my experience it's often better to do so in this situation.

Yes, I was going to apologize anyway.

 

[Moonlight Drive]

Now I have another problem. Well, it's not one yet, but it could become one.

I've got my fingers in a lot of pies atm. There's plenty of girls I've been tuning over the holidays for those who don't understand what that meant. Anyway, a girl I've been pretty close friends with for a few years now just broke up with her boyfriend, and she's pretty upset. This is pretty similar to last year when she broke up with her last boyfriend, and I was that shoulder to cry on. Now I have a bit of a moral issue here. Would it be wrong of me to take advantage of her right now, or even anytime soon?

 

[Nancy Di Loreto]

BACK TO MY PROBLEM! (Moonlight Drive, I'll help you in a sec)

I just rang up that girl.

I apologized and said I was sorry, that what I said what was wrong. She's still pissed off at me but appreciates that I called, she's cooking dinner right now at her place. I asked her if I should ring back later so she can yell at me, but she doesn't want to. Monday we had planned to go to a friend's party in Frankston during the day (Before our little mishap). I asked her if she wanted to touch base then, she didn't really say anything. Should I wait or what?

Moonlight...

My advice would to bring her to a movie and help cheer her up a little. You seem like a witty guy (I'm one myself). Just keep it fun and try to make her feel happy, don't bring up the boyfriend. If you think it's right to try something, then go for it. Or wait till another time, but just make sure it doesn't look like you're taking advantage, and you should get her in the sack in no time :wink2:

 

[Moonlight Drive]

I apologized and said I was sorry, that what I said what was wrong. She's still pissed off at me but appreciates that I called, she's cooking dinner right now at her place. I asked her if I should ring back later so she can yell at me, but she doesn't want to. Monday we had planned to go to a friend's party in Frankston during the day (Before our little mishap). I asked her if she wanted to touch base then, she didn't really say anything. Should I wait or what?

Sounds like it's going good. She appreciates you said sorry, so she'll probably simmer down. Just wait until tomorrow and talk to her again about that party. If she's still angry there's not much you can do, but she'll get over it soon enough by the sounds of it. All you can do is wait really.

I have full confidence in getting in with her, especially now, I dunno, I just feel kinda bad using a break-up to my advantage. I normally wouldn't have a problem, but she's a pretty good friend. Would it be the wrong thing to do?

 

[Nancy Di Loreto]

Sounds like it's going good. She appreciates you said sorry, so she'll probably simmer down. Just wait until tomorrow and talk to her again about that party. If she's still angry there's not much you can do, but she'll get over it soon enough by the sounds of it. All you can do is wait really.

I have full confidence in getting in with her, especially now, I dunno, I just feel kinda bad using a break-up to my advantage. I normally wouldn't have a problem, but she's a pretty good friend. Would it be the wrong thing to do?

It's only wrong if you view it as being an advantage, which it isn't at all. And if she says to you, "I don't think I'm ready just yet", then that's cool, just wait it out. If you've got a few other girls going, then try with the other ones, unless she means the most. I was in the same position holidays back, but I didn't capitalize on the right one

 

[Moonlight Drive]

Only thing is, I'm sure I'd get the 'I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship' response at any other time, but she'll cling to just about anything right now. That's why I feel kinda bad.

Eh, I dunno. Suppose I'll test the waters and make a decision.

 

[Nancy Di Loreto]

Only thing is, I'm sure I'd get the 'I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship' response at any other time, but she'll cling to just about anything right now. That's why I feel kinda bad.

Eh, I dunno. Suppose I'll test the waters and make a decision.

She might cling to you, but maybe just as emotional baggage, which isn't too bad in the short term. If she says the "Ruin our friendship" line, tell her to go have a think about it. Works for me :biggrinthumb:

 

[Kaptain KnicKy]

Who is right to give advice about relationships? I was just thinking about this, and there are a few things I came to, when it comes to girls/boys and relationships...

Pretty much every girl is different. Sure, some/most will have certain things about their personality that are the same, or slightly different in a sense. But to look at almost any two girls and say advice about one, to apply to both, will not always work.

I suppose there are two types of people out there, when it comes to dating. Inexperienced and experienced.

Inexperienced. I'd consider myself in this category. You're knew to it all, you have only had one, two maybe three (actual) relationships in your life, thus far. You can't say you've had that many girls that you know all about girls/boys. So, why take advice from them - they haven't got the experience.

Experienced - why take advice from these guys/gals? They obviously keep making mistakes in relationship. Whether it be a mistake they actually make, or maybe their personality it just severely stunted. You can't take advice from them, because they are the one's who need the advice.

There are also those who have only had maybe one or two gals/guys in their lifetime, and are now married/in a long relationship. I don't know who is, on here, but these guys are different as well. They are inexperienced, but not in the bad way. They just won't know about any other girl, because (and this aint a bad thing) they haven't been with other girls. They've had one/two/three girls/guys and only know about him/her.

Then you've got your psychologists/psychiatrists in here, who could possibly be the only ones you could take advice from.


Sorry this is slightly off topic, but I was just curious into this matter.

 

[Moonlight Drive]

As long as you keep it in context from who it's from and who it's about, you'll be fine. Whenever I need relationship advice, it's usually one of my lady friends (experience really doesn't matter here, since I always ask one of their good buddies) or on here. And I don't always follow through with what people suggest, but it's always put into consideration.

As for categories, I dunno where I'd be. It's not like I've had 89 girlfriends, but every relationship, and a lot of friendships that've ended messily, I have been in I've learnt a pretty important lesson from, so I feel I understand what to do in a lot of situations. Although getting a second opinion never hurts.

 

[Evil Austin]

Id say I am inexperienced, I have had two and the longest one was the first one which lasted 9 months.

 

[Evil Austin]

the one that lasted nine months in Sydney I never got dumped and I never really dumped her. It was more of a mutual thing as I was leaving australia and there was no point in keeping an overseas relationship as those a fucking hard via emails and the fact that we can't see each other besides webcam.

But we are still friends but not boyfriend and girl friend as we thought since I won't be in the country any more that it would be the best decision.

And now I have my second one that has been since about the begining of January this year.

 

[MikeRaw]

Who is right to give advice about relationships? I was just thinking about this, and there are a few things I came to, when it comes to girls/boys and relationships...

Pretty much every girl is different. Sure, some/most will have certain things about their personality that are the same, or slightly different in a sense. But to look at almost any two girls and say advice about one, to apply to both, will not always work.

I suppose there are two types of people out there, when it comes to dating. Inexperienced and experienced.

Inexperienced. I'd consider myself in this category. You're knew to it all, you have only had one, two maybe three (actual) relationships in your life, thus far. You can't say you've had that many girls that you know all about girls/boys. So, why take advice from them - they haven't got the experience.

Experienced - why take advice from these guys/gals? They obviously keep making mistakes in relationship. Whether it be a mistake they actually make, or maybe their personality it just severely stunted. You can't take advice from them, because they are the one's who need the advice.

There are also those who have only had maybe one or two gals/guys in their lifetime, and are now married/in a long relationship. I don't know who is, on here, but these guys are different as well. They are inexperienced, but not in the bad way. They just won't know about any other girl, because (and this aint a bad thing) they haven't been with other girls. They've had one/two/three girls/guys and only know about him/her.

Then you've got your psychologists/psychiatrists in here, who could possibly be the only ones you could take advice from.


Sorry this is slightly off topic, but I was just curious into this matter.

Well, Ninja Star bumped this, and this caught my eye, so whatever.
Anyways, I don't think it's as simple as expierienced or inexpierienced.
For example, having more relationships doesn't make you more expierienced, and having less doesn't make you inexpierienced.
If you've had two long relationships, each in exxess of a year or two, you can still be expierienced even though you only had two, and may be more expierienced that someone who has had like 6.
But at the same time, it can work the way you said, where someone with only 2 relationships is less expierienced.
It can go either way, and expierienced/inexpierienced can't be defined necessarily by the quantity of relationships, but instead, by the quality.

 

[Kaptain KnicKy]

^^^Great point. I did mean to bring that across in my post, but obviously not.

Quality > Quantity.

 

[comicgeekelly]

Well this is the first time I've ventured into this thread in awhile and I need help, but first I should explain the whole backstory.

Ok, so there's this girl who I was interested in about a year and a half ago. I became friends with her, but nothing more and I eventually stopped trying to get romantically involved with her. Fast forward to now. She's one of my best friends and I've realized that I'm in love with her. I don't know how to ask her out without it being kinda weird and I'm also not sure how she feels about me (she gave me homemade brownies and a handmade card for my birthday, so I think that's a good sign that she feels something for me). Anybody wanna try and help me with this?