Extremely frustrated right now

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monkeystyle

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So, my lady friend is away until mid May and so our main method of communication is through gmail chat.

Two days ago she was super excited to show me this recording of Einstein playing the violin. (She's a musician) So I started listening to it and as I usually do, I scroll down to the comments and see a couple mentioning to take a look at the date posted. When was it posted? March 31st but that could easily have been April 1st in another time zone.

That wasn't enough for me so I figured I should google that shit. I did and there is not one recording of Einstein playing anywhere to be found.

So, I do my best to let her know that it was an April Fool's joke in an easy way as she is incredibly sensitive.

What happens? She gets extremely defensive and starts insulting me by calling me a know it all and saying that I always have to be right. Of course this isn't the case, I just know this chick pretty well at this point and she was going to share that shit everywhere. I just didn't want her to potentially embarrass herself in front of her colleagues.

So no biggie, we get over it and no problems. Until tonight. I literally just finished talking to her and she started in on it again. She refuses to admit that it is fake. Refuses to see that it was an April Fool's Joke and it is driving me mad.

This easily goes well beyond stubbornness and as much as I love this girl I don't know what to do. I've never really seen this side of her before. She's being so willfully ignorant and it makes me really mad.

I don't know what the fuck to do. This seems like it should be such an insignificant thing but I honestly feel like I want to break up with her right now.

Maybe I just need to sleep on this. What would you do?
 
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I would just stall and refuse to deal with any real emotional issue until it eventually hopefully withers away. Or throw a shit fit. (In any relationship, friendship or otherwise.)

Goes to show why I'm so much of a success in personal relationships I guess.
 

CaptainxBumout

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Was this supposed to be Beethoven or Einstein? You said both. Regardless this seems like just a small argument that you shouldn't break up over. That said it could be that this is just how she is about everything. If its a one off argument fuck it. Pick your battles. I stay away from people who are stubborn and refuse to believe they're wrong but it appears you're very deep in with this girl.

I dont know if its just me but if I get in an argument with someone, we sit down and talk like adults whether they want to or not. I'd say don't break up and just talk to her. Just bring up her stubbornness in general and not the argument. She'll get mad and defensive but just hear her out and let her scream. The important thing would be to stay calm and don't interrupt regardless of how many times she will interrupt you. Get how you feel across and if worse comes to worse, tell her your through. She should sit on it for awhile and then apologize. If not well you tried and its just a deal breaker of a personality trait. If it does work out, she'll be less annoying, your relationship will be stronger and she'll be an overall better person. That's what I'd do anyways haha.
 

monkeystyle

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I would just stall and refuse to deal with any real emotional issue until it eventually hopefully withers away. Or throw a shit fit. (In any relationship, friendship or otherwise.)

Goes to show why I'm so much of a success in personal relationships I guess.

I've tried this. Aside from throwing a shit fit because there is no way I could out shit fit her.

Was this supposed to be Beethoven or Einstein? You said both. Regardless this seems like just a small argument that you shouldn't break up over. That said it could be that this is just how she is about everything. If its a one off argument fuck it. Pick your battles. I stay away from people who are stubborn and refuse to believe they're wrong but it appears you're very deep in with this girl.

Sorry, it was Einstein. I don't know why I wrote Beethoven.

But yes, you're right. I am in very deep with her but this isn't the first time something like this has happened. Anytime we get into any sort of discussion that has real life bearing (ie: politics, social issues) she runs away from the discussion and then tells me that we can't fight anymore. Even though there are no raised voices or angry words, any disagreement is fighting to her. So I've learned to keep my mouth shut for the most part.


I dont know if its just me but if I get in an argument with someone, we sit down and talk like adults whether they want to or not. I'd say don't break up and just talk to her. Just bring up her stubbornness in general and not the argument. She'll get mad and defensive but just hear her out and let her scream. The important thing would be to stay calm and don't interrupt regardless of how many times she will interrupt you. Get how you feel across and if worse comes to worse, tell her your through. She should sit on it for awhile and then apologize. If not well you tried and its just a deal breaker of a personality trait. If it does work out, she'll be less annoying, your relationship will be stronger and she'll be an overall better person. That's what I'd do anyways haha.

Solid advice. I'm going to let it sit until tomorrow when we talk again. The only problem is that if she doesn't wish to discuss something she'll just shut down and resort to attacks against any of my personal failings. Or become absolutely ridiculous.

As an example. She was in the orchestra for the Video Games Live concert. She got me a ticket and I went to the show. There was an awesome video presentation to go along with each piece and I loved it.

Afterwards, she asked me how it was. I said it was great, I really enjoyed it. She asked me if I watched her play. I said yes, of course but I was mostly watching the video screens. She became upset and distraught and accused me of not supporting her or appreciating her art. Made me miserable for days afterwards because my attention wasn't fully on her.

I think the reason I'm so upset right now because I feel like this could very well be the straw that broke the camel's back. I don't want to let her go because I love her so goddamned much but I've said things like this before to her and none of it matters to her.

I've made a couple of significant life changes for this girl in the last year at her request and it just feels like she thinks that I have to adapt to her and not that we have to adapt to each other.

Jesus, writing that last bit out was incredibly fucking depressing.
 

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Well since the issue really isn't important to say the least... I mean it's a fucking Youtube video, it's not like you two were buying a car or paying a mortgage off this ridiculous assumption... I'd just let her be willfully ignorant if it means that much to her. Why should it matter to you what her friends think of her if she's wrong? Let her face the consequences of being naive and gullible on her own. You don't have to save her from everything. Particularly not something as trivial as this.

Sometimes you just have to let the woman have her day. Even if you know 100% you're right and she's wrong. It seriously isn't worth the headache that comes with the arguments. If it has no bearing on you, just shrug it off. All women are like that. All of them.
 

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Seems like a dumb bitch, and a drama queen to boot.

Dump.
 

monkeystyle

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It's done.

Over the fucking internet at that. There really is truth to the saying not with a bang but with a whimper. Wish it wasn't 1am on a Sunday night. I need many drinks right now.

Feel so pathetic right now.

Fuck this noise.
 

monkeystyle

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Nah, I'm sticking around.

And actually, she broke up with me. I think that's why I was taken so off guard. I was really upset about the whole thing last night but I woke up this morning and I feel fantastic. The sun was shining and it felt like a giant weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

First thing I did this morning? Went and purchased a pack of smokes. Goddamn I missed smoking.

I seriously can't believe how happy I am today.

It's a great day to be alive.
 

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