The Professor: Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to Wild Wild Wednesday on Showtime...and here is The Snake Pit with your Showtime Champion Jake THE SNAAAAAKE Roberts!
Snake:You know people the Snake has had a long career and battled with many bad men...but I have never been beaten down like I was Monday Night...Kevin Sullivan you and I have a history together as this pictures shows
but that was a long time ago...and it seems that Sullivan is no longer a fan of the Snake's..after I eliminated his man Mortis out of the Battle Royal he sent out his goons including Papa Shango...now Shango we seem to have a problem brewing...I can take a beat down...it has happened to me many times before....but you want to put your voodoo curse on me...you think that bothers me? A snake lives his life in darkness...Shango bring your best bring all your skulls and spells you want and I will bring my friend in this bag and we all know he doesn't get spooked.
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Sullivan:You always thought you were the sickest Jake...the most evil..the most insane...but we both know that is not the case. You betrayed me a long time ago when you started pandering to these idiotic people and siding with the likes of Dusty Rhodes and The Rock. Men with no real backbone. My Doomsday Inc has been assembled to rid DFWA of such men and we are going to start with you Jake..
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Shango:Welcome to my black circle Snake...you will not be ok...you will not make it out alive...and that title you so proudly hold on to will belong to Papa Shango!
Jake:You wanna come and try and take it go ah...
*The Powers of Pain attack Jake from behind and then Mortis comes out and helps with the attack...Nikita Koloff comes out to help Jake and takes it to Mortis and the Powers of Pain...but then Yokozuna is lead out by Luna and he is about to squash Jake when Johnson and Jackson come out...Big Zeke double clotheslines the Powers of Pain, and Ahmed bodyslams Yokozuna
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Jake then DDTs Mortis and goes after Shango and Sullivan as they flee with Luna out the back of the stage...
Professor:well that was an insane way to kick off our show..I will be back later with more updates from WWW
"alirght folks it's the Professor back with your updates from our Wild Wild Wednesdays program on Showtime. After the insanity that was Doomsday Inc attacking Jake The Snake Roberts in the Snake Pit
- we had the debut of the Motor City Machine Guns in DFWA as they made short work of State Patrol when they hit Buddy Lee Parker with the Skull & Bones.
- Then we had the American Dream Dusty Rhodes w/Sapphire facing off against Buff Bagwell w/Sunny. This match went back & forth and Dusty was about to hit the big elbow on Buff when The Pope came out and started arguing with Sapphire . Dusty then went over to confront Pope but when his back was turned Buff got up and hit him with the Buff Blockbuster for the 1 2 3. Dusty then chased the Pope to the back as Sunny & Buff celebrated in the middle of the ring.
- The Natural Disasters in a handicapped match defeated The Mulkey Brothers & High Voltage with double avalanches. They then issued an open challenge for Showtime Saturday for the MotherFuckin Tag Titles. But when Johnson & Jackson came out and accepted Jimmy Hart freaked out saying it's a nontitle match but The Cat came out and told Hart tough shit his boys open their mouths now they gotta pay the price next Saturday.
- Jimmy Wang Yang defeated the Gambler when he hit Yang Time at the 4 minute mark. After the match Honky Tonk Man came down to the ring with Jimmy Hart in tow. Honky claimed that Yang was nothing but a Honky Tonk wannabe and that he vowed to rid DFWA of this two bit impersonator. Yang then suicide dived onto Honky & Hart before the men were separated by security.
- Next Prime Time Sam Roberts did an interview with the Horsemen and here it is.
Dillon: Just be quiet Roberts and let me make history here. You know the Horsemen have a long history of excellence as well as making monumental waves wherever we go. DFWA is no different we came here to make a statement isn't that right Arn?
Arn:When JJ, Tully, & I decided to come to DFWA we knew Barry & Ric wouldn't be able to come here with us because they were leaving the Horsemen mark on two other feds. But we wanted to make sure that the Horsemen name would take over DFWA so we decided to get ourselves the biggest baddest motherfucker in this federation to stand with us as part of the single greatest stable of all time. We looked for further then the man behind me. The BadAss Motherfuckin Champ Mike Awesome.
Tully:That right Double A but we knew that the Horsemen needed to be at full force here in DFWA in order to stay on top. We always had the dirtiest player in the game as our leader. There will never be another Ric Flair but we wanted to get someone as our fourth member that could not only match the charisma of Ric Flair but the lack of any moral fiber at all someone who will stop at nothing to keep the Horsemen on top.
Dillon:It is my pleasure to introduce the newest member of the Four Horsemen....
AWWWWWWWWWWESOMMMMMME
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*Miz comes out and hugs JJ, Arn, Tully, & Awesome
Miz: Are ya shocked people? Is this what you thought would happen today? Of course not! We made history today as the single most must see champion in wrestling history on his second day in DFWA has joined the greatest wrestling stable in history...that is right I am now a member of the Four FUCKIN Horsemen. Now the Awesome one is stable mates with the greatest technical tag team of all time and the original Awesome One..Mike Awesome...that's right Awesome & Awesome together at last. So Rock, Macho King, The American Dream, Sheamus, Jake Roberts and all the other pions in the back...you are on notice cuz the Miz is here and he is AWWWWWWWWWWWW
Misssssteeeeeerrrrrrr
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Primetime:Holy Shit it can't be! But it is...it's Mr Kennedy!
Kennedy: Oh hi Mikey. Didn't mean to interrupt the big circle jerk you guys had going on. But you were going on a little long and The Cat wanted me to make my debut before everyone went to sleep and well I am probably a little late for that cuz they had to listen to you four bozos bore the living crap out of everyone. That's right I just signed my contract with Dope as Fuck today....and since you are putting everyone on notice I thought I would make sure I get noticed...you notice me Mikey? How bout you Big Mikey? Arn? Tully? Col Sanders? Well I gotta run but I ran into a guy in the back that wanted a second to talk to you boys as well.
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Sheamus:Tank ya Ken and welcome aboard DFWA. I got someting to say to the big fella in the back with the mullet. Awesome you put me through a few tables Monday night but you fucked up fella. You let me get back up. Now I am just pissed off and ready for a fight. So why don't you come out from behind the old men and the annoying new guy and we get finish what we started..
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Miller:Now now now we already got two main events lined up for tonight so Sheamus you are just gonna have to wait til Saturday night but instead of you two one on one I wanna see just how good these new Horsemen are gonna work together...so Sheamus, Kennedy you two find yourselves two partners to take on The Four Horsemen for Showtime Saturday Night this Saturday. You have until the end of this show or I will pick two guys for ya.
- that was certainly history making interview segment with the Miz joining the Horsemen and then the debut of Mr Kennedy in DFWA..but to top it all off Sheamus & Kennedy with two mystery partners will be facing the Horsemen this Saturday. Luckily we didn't have to wait long to see who Sheamus found
Primetime Sam Roberts (backstage with Sheamus & Kennedy): Gentlemen I understand that you already have your partners for Saturday Night
Sheamus:That's right Sam, Ken is new here so he left the recruitment up to me. I went right for a couple of guys that I have know for a long time every since we started out back in the United Kingdom together. They said they would gladly join us The Showtime Tag Champions Brutus Magnus & Douglas Williams.
*British Invasion comes out and high fives Sheamus and Kennedy they all laugh and walk off together*
- that promises to be an amazing match on Saturday Night for sure
- next up the Six Man Tag Champions Power & Glory & The Natural Butch Reed w/ Slick took on the team of Strike Force & The Patriot...and you will not believe what transpired during this match...from the start Martel seemed to not want to get into the ring at all...Tito and The Patriot did most of the work and had a few near pinfalls...Reed then whipped Tito into the ropes at which time he knocked into Martel. Martel then turned around and slapped Santana the two started to brawl when The Twin Towers came out and snatched the Patriot off the apron and double bear hugged him til he was out..Hercules and Roma grabbed Martel and Santana and threw them in the ring then Slick came in and approached them and Martel gave him a big hug and just as he was doing that Hercules came up from behind Santana and put in him in a full nelson after that Roma hit him with a flying elbow from the top rope, Reed then hit him with a Gorilla Press Slam, finally Martel put Santana in Boston Crab as Akeem jumped on top of the helpless Santana. I can report that Santana is hurt and will be out of DFWA for a long long time. Martel later said he was sick of carrying around Santana and has joined up with a stable of his equals. Martel also stated that he will now be going by Rick "The Model" Martel. Hmmm.
- The Impact Players w/ Sunny defeated the Bushwackers when Justin Credible hit That's Incredible on Luke.
- Henning & Harris defeated the Freebirds when Henning hit Hayes with a Perfect Plex at the 12 minute mark
- The Main Event was a Six Man Match between Beer Money w/ Ashley & Scott Norton vs The Sky Scrapers w/Sherri & Gunner..this match was brutal from the get go...Norton slammed Spivey against the concrete then slammed the steel steps into his back. Spivey did not get up and hand to be removed by EMT's as that was going on The Beverly Brothers w/ The Genius came out and attacked BMI as Sid & Gunner took out Norton..meanwhile Sherri and Ashley brawled in the stands with Ashley ripping of the Queen's top as she ran to the back....the match was called a no contest and The Rock and The Macho King were seen brawling at the entrance as it seems they both were coming out at the same time...and got into it...that massive brawl was the seen as we went off air...but Spivey does seem to be out for a long period of time as well...Gunner will take his place with Sid as the World Tag Team Champions..
also the first match for I'm Here For The Gangbang Warfare has been announced
vs
no surprise to anyone after what happened at the beginning of tonite's show Jake The Snake Roberts heads up a team to go against Kevin Sullivan's sick & twisted Doomsday Inc
for his team Jake chose his half brother Sam Houston, Ahmed Johsnon, Ezekial Jackson, & long time friend Nikita Koloff
Sullivan chose his monster Yokozuna, Mortis, The Powers of Pain, and Voodoo Master Papa Shango
well it certainly lived up to the name Wild Wild Wednesdays and I will see you all this weekend for Showtime Saturday Night
