Match #30
Sheamus (c) vs. Big Show
for the World Heavyweight Championship
WWE Hell in a Cell - October 28, 2012
Fate, why must you be so cruel to me? You've given me a match with Big Show, one of the wrestlers I most consistently don't enjoy watching. He's not my least favourite wrestler to watch - that would be Buff Bagwell - but it's a rare time I see a match with Paul Wight involved and think "Yeah, I liked that". In particular, it's this era of Big Show that's often painful to watch, as WWE used him as a big red button marked
if in doubt, insert big lad. They'd push it, and he'd come in to ruin everything, often with interference. And when it got into actual matches, it wasn't fun either, as he's always been limited in-ring. Add that to Sheamus, when he was basically just a generic babyface without the stiff brawling edge we know and love today, and I'm sure this one is going to be bad. I also can't help but notice this is at a Cell PPV but isn't in the Cell. At least it's not shoehorned, but it's an odd choice by Vince standards, given that a stip could add an edge.
You'll notice that was a much longer opening than usual. That's because I really don't want to watch this match.
Lobster Head (yeah I know that's not the name, but you know what I'm talking about) is a good theme. That said, I like Sheamus' current theme more. Show's out in a hood while Cole informs us of his ironclad contract that lets him do anything he wants. Yeah... that angle. He cried for Johnny Ace and now he can't be fired. This is a first time matchup, somehow. I reckon that even at the time, it would have felt like it had been done too often.
Sheamus goes for a headlock but Show just lifts him. The next while is just Show wrecking Sheamus with strikes. His chest is red just a minute in, and his own attempts at strikes seem ineffectual. Sheamus sells an open hand chop by Show like he's been shot in the chest. We get a shot of Mr. MitB Dolph Ziggler watching this from the back (side-on, as usual) as if he hasn't gotten his ass kicked by Sheamus again and again recently, so what chance would he have against Show even on a cash-in? Sheamus finally downs Show briefly with a clip to his knee, but Show just rolls out and gets to his feet again. He does get cornered for a bit as he returns to the ring, but he manages to toss Sheamus off (ooh err) and out of the ring. This is dragging already.
Show tosses Sheamus into the barricade then, back in the ring, completes one part of Standard Heel Heat Segment with a rope choke. Dueling chants, but Michael Cole only acknowledges the pro-face side, as per. While Show continues to whale on Sheamus, commentary talks about how he, in his debut match, kicked Hulk Hogan's ass. I
think that's a shot at TNA? One more rope choke. Show then snuffs out Sheamus' second wind and tosses him right at the announce team. I think JR got most of that. A Show elbow gets two. Sheamus has gotten NOTHING. His punches are doing absolutely nothing to Show.
Sheamus finally gets his second significant move in, a slingshot shoulderblock, but Show gets up first. Sheamus' momentum is wiped out instantly by a big boot, while commentary talks about how he's one of those men who's born to fight, like Finlay, or... Mr. McMahon. Really? Cole mentions Tebowing. Oh yeah, because it's 2012, when getting on one knee in an NFL game got you positive publicity and not harassment by white supremacists. Sheamus gets some punches in, which Show does not sell, and then leaps right into a Show bearhug. He uses clubbing forearms to power out, but my hope that this match might be less of a slow squash is snuffed out as he tries to SCOOP SLAM the 441-pound man. It ends like you'd expect. Vader Bomb by Show gets two.
Sheamus move count reaches three as he counters a chokeslam into a DDT. Show still kicks out so hard that Sheamus is launched through the ropes. This briefly makes the match slightly more even until Sheamus goes for his ten clubs in the corner; he only gets four before Show catches him. Show then hits a chokeslam for only two, sadly. Honestly though, I'm starting to admire how Sheamus is staying strong. He powers out of a Colossal Clutch and tries to lock in a cloverleaf, but that ends in a pinning predicament and requires Show to kick out. Sheamus is tossed through the ropes again.
Back to Show slapping Sheamus on the outside. Sheamus manages to slip out of a slam into the post, then rams Show into the post himself. Back in the ring, Sheamus dodges a chokeslam, manages to topple Show again, then hits WHITE NOISE!!
I popped really hard for that because I legit forgot Sheamus had an Air Raid Crash, of all the moves, in his moveset.
He then goes for the Brogue Kick, but Show catches it and he lands his KO Punch. I have always seen a plain punch being a finisher as lame. I know he's got big hands and it's realistic and all, but apparently this was all WWE could think of for Show since Kane has to have exclusive access to the chokeslam as a finisher for some reason. Or maybe he's just that limited. Sheamus kicks out and the crowd goes wild. What will put him down at this point? Sheamus finally hits the Brogue Kick, but has to crawl and only gets two. He's going for the second, but another Literally Just A Punch gets Show the win and the title.
You know what? Very watchable. Show's his usual big lumbering slow giant self, but it's nice to have a story like this. Sheamus kept getting up when he was knocked down and it got me into it eventually. I was dreading this being below the "Thundercats Line" as I'm now going to call it, but it's spared. Still not the classic that some people on Cagematch seem to think it is though. Maybe I'm just prejudiced against Big Show.