What if Swamps Owned a Porn Shop?

[Swamps]

Well, that is a strange, yet interesting question!

I think if this were a reality, it would go something like this...

Of Course, I would b the evil owner who stole 100% Ownership from my former Partner Fuji Vice who is now caused a massive and nasty legal battle that aready puts the establishment at risk!

My store manager would definately be Zod because the man knows how to run a business right, and I don't think he would embezzle my funds... too much .

The Assistant Manager would Wang Chung because his awesome charisma will keep the people coming to the business for their perverted desires! Also, awesome name, with soooo many possible catch phrases when dealing customers.

The Professional Gimp/Sex Toy Tester will be none other than Mr. Booty! Women will come from miles away just to get their rear ends spanked by the real big bad booty daddy... and a few guys too.

Team Lead Cashier will definately be Blazy because 1) I couldn't trust him with all my products in theback (You are paid to ring up merchandise... not whack the weasel sir!) 2) uh.... guess number one was enough.

Floor Customer Service Specialist is definately The Viper. Man knows his products and will provide excellent customer service!

The guy in charge of stocking shelves and making sure all skin flicks are up and running is Lineback... we all know you like to watch so it will be your dream job, bro!

The guy who is just employed because he is cool will be The EC. Gotta have a smokin partner when my ole lady is a bitching my ear off.

Our number one customer/Trench Coat wearing weirdo will be Sabs. Is there any doubt to this one? Mr. Filthy McWhack Whack! Seriously, we appreciate your business though sir!

The following people are banned... Chosen Messiah, grown men dressed up like Lions, and a few others to be added later!

My personal Sex Slave... Troy... I miss you baby

:booty:

 

[Postman Dave]

patrolling the aisles? It what I do baby! Anyone caught playing games will feel the full wrath of the "long arm" of my law!

We need to find more reasons to use that smilie. Too good to go unused.

 

[Lover Boy]

Where do I send my CV?

 

[Swamps]

Where do I send my CV?

Well, Booty has a position open for "Gimp Assistant" so you should send your application and/or resume to him.

 

[Wang Chung]

I knew I chose my name wisely and I will use some slang Wang.

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[Retarded Duckling]

I'll be a regular customer.

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[Hoss]

Be in the staff lounge with the tangerine dream, you already know :hat:

 

[Mitch Buchannon]

I'll be the guy running the 25 cent peep show right?

 

[Orobin Thor]

I'll be the in store security to toss the pervs and trolls out of the building.

 

[Retarded Duckling]

I'll be the in store security to toss the pervs and trolls out of the building.

Its a porn store. There isn't anyone there who isn't a pervert.

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[Orobin Thor]

Its a porn store. There isn't anyone there who isn't a pervert.

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Im talkin about those individuals that try to push their way in to viewing rooms with others, attempted rapes, etc etc. These businesses need security for all the morons, like yourself.

 

[Hidden Blaze]

Shows how well you know me, I'll still whack it no matter where you put me at.

 

[Retarded Duckling]

Be in the staff lounge with the tangerine dream, you already know :hat:

Ok, so it has been 44 years since your last post... I thought I should reply.

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[Retarded Duckling]

Ok, can I get a job? I love te idea of a swampy porn store! XD

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