The camera slowly fades to Danny Jacobs laying on his expensive couch in his locker room with a towel over his crotch area, getting a massage from two hot Asian girls. One of them is massaging his back, the other is massaging his feet. Both seem to be very into the IWT Champion, seeing how big and how muscled up he is.
Suddenly, backstage interviewer Alex Price walks into the locker room with a microphone. The Asians stop massaging the champion, which causes the champion to open his eyes, bewildered why the Asian girls suddenly stopped. He sees Alex Price, and immediately gets annoyed.
''I'M NAKED! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! COULDN'T YOU KNOCK?''
''I'm deeply sorry, si-''
''YOU SHOULD BE! WHO ARE YOU?''
''I'm the backstage intervie-''
''WHY ARE YOU HERE? SECURITY! A FAN HAS BARGED INTO THE BACKSTAGE AREA! Listen, what do you want? An ass-kicking? An autograph? Because I can give both, you just gotta pay for the latter. I ain't workin' for free, y'dig?''
''You asked for this interview time, sir.''
''Yes, I asked for interview time, not to get assaulted by some fucking creep whilst I'm having some private time with these wonderful, WONDERFUL young ladies beside me.''
Danny Jacobs winks at the two Asian ladies, who start to giggle out of excitement.
''Now, you ruined my private time because you do things before you think. You're unorganized, but then again, everything in this company is unorganized so I don't think I can really fault you for that. Now, you got my attention. You're the interviewer. Now, ask me some damn questions! You got two minutes, make it worth my time.''
''C-Can you beat Joseph Diamond..?''
Danny Jacobs immediately responds with a cold look on his face, no emotion is shown.
''Yes.''
''Are there anymore riveting questions you're gonna ask me, or will you leave knowing you've caught a real gem, a real newsworthy answer? You goddamn moron?''
The interviewer is kinda frightened by the attitude from Danny towards him, however, he mans up and asks him another question.
''D-Don't you think you're under-estimating Mr. Diamond? I-I mean, he's a former Intercontinental Champion, he's been undefeated for an entire year last year! Not to mention that if you'll lose, you're forced to retire from Precision. Don't you feel any type of pressure..?''
''No. I'm not under-estimating him at all. I used to pride myself on being a three-time World Champion here as well, because this place was all I knew. This place was all I understood, and I thought that those titles meant that I was the best. That I really was the champion of the World. I was the blind leading the blind, just like Joseph is now. Don't get me wrong, he's one of the best in this company, but that doesn't mean anything when Precision doesn't mean anything. He's priding himself on being a former Intercontinental Champion. He calls out IWT, he thinks he's the best, yet why doesn't he come to IWT and prove that? Why doesn't he take on another Hall of Famer here and only REAL Intercontinental Champion in James Dragon?''
''Because in IWT, he wouldn't succeed. Because in IWT, he wouldn't get anywhere near my success. He wouldn't get anywhere near James Dragon's success. We didn't get handed shit here, and we succeeded despite that. In reality, we don't have anything to prove here anymore. Everyone wanted The Bullad Club out, and look what that caused? We single-handedly took over the wrestling industry, and now everyone here would want us back in an instant. Because we're stars, shinin' bright like a diamond, both in IWT and in Precision.''
''The truth is that Joseph is damn good compared to everyone else in this company, but that's like comparing dog shit to horse shit. Just like there's no comparison in IWT and Precision, just like there's no comparison in the IWT Championship and the Precision World Championship, which is why for once, I'm actually proud of holding a World Championship. Because this here means something. Everyone can succeed in the minor leagues, but it takes a man to climb the hills I've climbed, it takes a man to fight the battles I've fought, it takes a man to hold this. I'm hotter than the sun whilst kicking 'em where the sun don't shine, brother~! The same will happen with Joseph Diamond, because despite his undefeated streak, despite everything he's accomplished in here, he will never get any further than that. Because he can't. I'm not taking him seriously because I don't have to. Because he's not in the same league as I am. Nobody here is.''
''Did that answer your question? LEAVE ME ALONE NOW! I wanna ''prepare'' for my match with these two lovely ladies. HAHA, THE BIG GUY~!~!''
Alex Price leaves with a frightened expression on his face, and Danny turns around to lay on his stomach again to continue the massage, until about 20 seconds later when the Asians stop and ask Danny a question...
''We done! You want happy end???''
Danny immediately turns around again and starts looking straight at the camera, winking and grinning towards it.
''WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!''
The Asian girls start giggling again and touch Danny around his chest area as the camera slowly fades to black again...
. Funny ass promo though, my man!
