Opening Thing - Too much like what BKB did on his last show. It doesn't really mean anything, but it's cute.
MVP vs Hardy - Some sloppy phrasing at the beginning. It's too much of you just trying to sound good, rather than just writing a nice, flowing match. It's a good match, and the No DQ part helped make it a better match. I don't know how you had a knockout count in a No DQ match. I don't know, I can't really get into this match. It would be nice for a main event, but it just felt like it kept going and going with no aim or sense of direction, or build. Hardy getting the win shows that he should be getting some kind of push. MVP should too, because he's awesome. Overall, it was a well written match for most of it, but I just didn't want to see a Main Event Caliber match on the fucking first match of the card. Balance.
Shelley Interview - Shelley as a heel is fine, because I can't picture Sabin cutting a promo with attitude. Nice story telling on how Sabin dragged Shelley down. It was weird how you had Shelley revert to saying "you" when talking about Sabin at the end of his piece. Orton's intervention was good with the way you had him, pretty in character for Orton. But having him but in on Shelley wasn't that good. Bumping in on a face would've been better, it kinda made Shelley look like a bitch.
Man In the Office - Ric Flair?
Shelley vs Sabin - Cool match to have. Opening mat wrestling didn't make sense at all the way you had it written. Too much wedging, dragging, and staring for me. I want action, not telling how cautious they lock up, or a "miscalculation of speed". the match got better as it progressed, some really good stuff there. I kind of got annoyed with the frequent mentioning of Alex, Shelley, Chris, Sabin in the match. Use some other word, like "his opponent", "the arrogant competitor", etc. I know that it's Shelley and Sabin in the match, but you could've included more selling and charisma spots instead of just move, pick up, move, counter. The ending was OK, and it sets up more room for the charismatic, high flying Chris Sabin to feud with the brash, arrogant and cocky Alex Shelley. You kinda made Sabin look like a heel towards the end with the use of the chair, but it's nothing major. Better than the first match.
HBK Interview - A good hype for the Battle Royal. Y2J coming in was how you should've done the Orton interference earlier, with a face. HBK kinda seemed a little generic, but Jericho's parts were written well.
Mizorrison vs London & Kendrick - I don't really like the concept of the match, but someone has to get a push. Again, there were some parts I had no clue what image you were trying to make, like...
He is about to bring Brian crashing down, but Kendrick tries to get funny in the sky.
There was more selling in the match than the previous 2, which is good for a tag match. Nice way of having London try and make a comeback, only for Morrison to not sell and come back. The Miz actually looked like a serious wrestler in this match, and having him compete instead of just getting beat was good.
The camera zooms into Morrison’s facial expression as he look like he is about to commit homicide with the victim being the referee.
What?
The end was pretty lame with the EMT's coming and saving Kendrick. That should've been saved for after the match, but it built some drama to the end, making London look like he was going to make the impossible win. The way Morrison was typical, and actually fit. But I really don't like how you had Miz & Morrison win. There really is nothing for London to do. I could see what's going to happen to kendrick if you turn him heel, but Miz and Morrison separated would've been a better decision, IMO. And at the end, with Kendrick and London's goodbye, Kendrick didn't even seem like he just was with the EMT's.
-Overall, this was a good first half. One thing I really need to see is balance. I really wouldn't want to see a main event length match with the first and third matches on the show. It's kind of overkill, and could set the bar too high for the next half. Balance. Your grammar was horrible at times, and some phrasing was just "there", some things weren't really needed. I could see lots of the influence of BKB and CMS with that first part. That was OK, but you should develop your own style. But as a whole, this was pretty good. And I know everyone else (or most of them) that reads this will be all over this just because of the length. Nice improvement, but there's still some areas which need help.