- Joined
- Sep 13, 2022
- Messages
- 3,009
- Reaction score
- 1,982
- Points
- 113
- Age
- 37
@weaselperson
Jon Snowmantashi
Wait…JON IS WEASELPERSON?!?!? Now that I’ve got that bombshell out of the way, let’s get into this. First, it’s important to note that I read this as someone who wasn’t around for the Snowmantashi “prime.” Outside of some conversations in the Discord, I didn’t know a lot of the history between MvH and Snowmantashi, and this promo did an excellent job of setting it up. I think we’ve all kind of accepted the fact that Jon didn’t put everything into these promos, which is incredible considering how damn good this was.
Weaselperson
This is probably one of the most…enigmatic characters that I’ve seen in my FWA time. I’m gonna come out and say that I’ve never totally “understood” weaselperson, but as usual, Jon can take something that looks ridiculous on the surface and manage to make it work. It’s a testament to his ability as a writer. Tying it altogether, giving me a story of how Kazadi was weaselperson, all of it came together here. This was another case of Jon knowing how to make readers invest in a match.
@The Golden One
XYZ
I think it’s clever that you tied the Trios promo into the XYZ promo since they all exist in this alternate, acid-trip of a reality. I also appreciate the way that the Magic School Bus is such a staple of XYZ and this world that he exists in. It’s all a very well-done thematic style of writing that carries over from one promo to the next. The look into how XYZ is feeling insecure about his leadership qualities, especially while the people who he leads are prepping for a title match, is a very real look at another enigmatic character. (No, enigmatic was not on my “word of the day” calendar, but it’s a term that applies to multiple characters). Do I feel like the promo could have benefited from some focus on the Triple Threat? I do. But by and large, this still worked as an abstract approach to XYZ and his abstract way of existing.
@Rawr
Dragonperson
Building this entire concept around Alyster’s own internal struggles is top notch. To my knowledge, there isn’t any sort of history between Black and Kaizen (boy, if I’ve missed something, I’m gonna look like a dumbass in public), but you still presented this in a way that made me believe that this match deeply matters to Aly in his dragonperson role. Feels like you struck the balance perfectly between setting up what’s going on with Alyster and him stomping weasels. Excellent work per usual, Rawr.
@Mandalorian
Alyster Black and Chris Peacock
I think Choose Your Own Adventure promos are incredibly difficult, even in the best of situations. I tried one once, and immediately realized how differently I could’ve set it up. Overall, it worked here, but I’m not entirely sure how much it actually added to the promo. That’s not to say it was poorly done, I’m just not sure that it really drove anything home, but it was fun to read, and I particularly enjoyed the result when you clicked on a couple of them and got some humorous responses. Setting up the dichotomy between Black and Peacock early really set the stage for the rest of the promo to me. Black’s CA home is lonely. Chris has his home set up for entertaining. It’s just a subtle way of further establishing how different their team is. The way that you both have these characters so intertwined while keeping them so independent of one another takes a lot of skill as writers IMO. Really like the play where Chris is constantly reminded that he’s “nothing more than a Krash replacement.” Per usual, you guys presented both characters wonderfully and reminded us all why Black/Peacock are at the top of the heap.
@Death Walker
Death Walker
I’m not sure how much we’ve gotten to talk about this fact, but the Death Walker character is one of my favorite characters that we have right now. You came into a highly competitive fed, and have hit your stride. I mentioned in the Discord recently that this triple threat match is one of the matches that I’m looking the most forward to. I’ll assume you likely got good marks for character portrayal on this one, as I feel like you do a good job of giving us layers to this character. As far as a critique, I feel like we could’ve had more focus on the match itself. You mentioned “both of these guys” and “these miserable fucks,” but I would’ve liked to have seen some focus on XYZ and Jason Randall. I especially think that Randall’s willingness to inflict pain, even if it means suffering pain, could’ve provided some fodder here.
@Jazz Wolf
Krash
It’s been talked about at length both here and in the Discord, but WOW. The way that you captured Krash’s trauma after the last year was powerful. You brought this whole thing to life with a level of description that is hard to pull off. The way that you bolded Krash’s internal dialogue which revolved around Jeremy was a nice touch. Seems like one of those things that is painfully obvious to do, but I would’ve never thought to do it. Loved the video game scene, which I assume is a reference to Krash “respawning” and coming back after what he’s been through. If that’s not what you were going for there, don’t tell me, because I read it that way and I loved it. The final conversation between Krash and Violet was absolutely flawless. You managed to make a wrestling match not about wrestling or wins and losses, but about a man who has to overcome the worst thing that he’s gone through. I have no clue how graders are going to come to a decision in this one, as it’s two of the best promos I’ve read. Excellent work, my friend. Excellent work.
Jon Snowmantashi
Wait…JON IS WEASELPERSON?!?!? Now that I’ve got that bombshell out of the way, let’s get into this. First, it’s important to note that I read this as someone who wasn’t around for the Snowmantashi “prime.” Outside of some conversations in the Discord, I didn’t know a lot of the history between MvH and Snowmantashi, and this promo did an excellent job of setting it up. I think we’ve all kind of accepted the fact that Jon didn’t put everything into these promos, which is incredible considering how damn good this was.
Weaselperson
This is probably one of the most…enigmatic characters that I’ve seen in my FWA time. I’m gonna come out and say that I’ve never totally “understood” weaselperson, but as usual, Jon can take something that looks ridiculous on the surface and manage to make it work. It’s a testament to his ability as a writer. Tying it altogether, giving me a story of how Kazadi was weaselperson, all of it came together here. This was another case of Jon knowing how to make readers invest in a match.
@The Golden One
XYZ
I think it’s clever that you tied the Trios promo into the XYZ promo since they all exist in this alternate, acid-trip of a reality. I also appreciate the way that the Magic School Bus is such a staple of XYZ and this world that he exists in. It’s all a very well-done thematic style of writing that carries over from one promo to the next. The look into how XYZ is feeling insecure about his leadership qualities, especially while the people who he leads are prepping for a title match, is a very real look at another enigmatic character. (No, enigmatic was not on my “word of the day” calendar, but it’s a term that applies to multiple characters). Do I feel like the promo could have benefited from some focus on the Triple Threat? I do. But by and large, this still worked as an abstract approach to XYZ and his abstract way of existing.
@Rawr
Dragonperson
Building this entire concept around Alyster’s own internal struggles is top notch. To my knowledge, there isn’t any sort of history between Black and Kaizen (boy, if I’ve missed something, I’m gonna look like a dumbass in public), but you still presented this in a way that made me believe that this match deeply matters to Aly in his dragonperson role. Feels like you struck the balance perfectly between setting up what’s going on with Alyster and him stomping weasels. Excellent work per usual, Rawr.
@Mandalorian
Alyster Black and Chris Peacock
I think Choose Your Own Adventure promos are incredibly difficult, even in the best of situations. I tried one once, and immediately realized how differently I could’ve set it up. Overall, it worked here, but I’m not entirely sure how much it actually added to the promo. That’s not to say it was poorly done, I’m just not sure that it really drove anything home, but it was fun to read, and I particularly enjoyed the result when you clicked on a couple of them and got some humorous responses. Setting up the dichotomy between Black and Peacock early really set the stage for the rest of the promo to me. Black’s CA home is lonely. Chris has his home set up for entertaining. It’s just a subtle way of further establishing how different their team is. The way that you both have these characters so intertwined while keeping them so independent of one another takes a lot of skill as writers IMO. Really like the play where Chris is constantly reminded that he’s “nothing more than a Krash replacement.” Per usual, you guys presented both characters wonderfully and reminded us all why Black/Peacock are at the top of the heap.
@Death Walker
Death Walker
I’m not sure how much we’ve gotten to talk about this fact, but the Death Walker character is one of my favorite characters that we have right now. You came into a highly competitive fed, and have hit your stride. I mentioned in the Discord recently that this triple threat match is one of the matches that I’m looking the most forward to. I’ll assume you likely got good marks for character portrayal on this one, as I feel like you do a good job of giving us layers to this character. As far as a critique, I feel like we could’ve had more focus on the match itself. You mentioned “both of these guys” and “these miserable fucks,” but I would’ve liked to have seen some focus on XYZ and Jason Randall. I especially think that Randall’s willingness to inflict pain, even if it means suffering pain, could’ve provided some fodder here.
@Jazz Wolf
Krash
It’s been talked about at length both here and in the Discord, but WOW. The way that you captured Krash’s trauma after the last year was powerful. You brought this whole thing to life with a level of description that is hard to pull off. The way that you bolded Krash’s internal dialogue which revolved around Jeremy was a nice touch. Seems like one of those things that is painfully obvious to do, but I would’ve never thought to do it. Loved the video game scene, which I assume is a reference to Krash “respawning” and coming back after what he’s been through. If that’s not what you were going for there, don’t tell me, because I read it that way and I loved it. The final conversation between Krash and Violet was absolutely flawless. You managed to make a wrestling match not about wrestling or wins and losses, but about a man who has to overcome the worst thing that he’s gone through. I have no clue how graders are going to come to a decision in this one, as it’s two of the best promos I’ve read. Excellent work, my friend. Excellent work.
