CWF - Past War Trashtalking #3 (Merging Issue)

[Prodigy]

The fans of a sudden break into a chorus of boos as CM Punk appears on a screen...

CM Punk: Now, I'm not here to f**k about, but considering you've all been screaming my name, wanting the thoughts of your straight edge saviour, here it goes...

This Monday I will defeat Chris Jericho with ease. I will teach him a lesson, a lesson of how leading a straight edge lifestyle means I'm better than HIM! You see Chris, you may believe that you are the BEST in the world at what you do, and in a sense that is true....but it's not for wrestling, oh no, Chris you are the best in the world at making fool out of yourself after drinking....you drink and drink and get into fights with nobodies like Shane Helms, then come out here and claim you are a great Wrestler, but the fact you are even associating yourself with guys like Shane Helms makes people beg to differ....in fact, I bet you are drinking now, trying to come up with some plan to beat me...well, I hate to break it to you Chris even a plan made when sober, wouldn't be complex enough to beat ME!
​

 

[Dod Draper]

[video=youtube;lz9VzshE0_4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lz9VzshE0_4&feature=related[/video]

The music of Chris Jericho blasts out through the titantron and Jericho appears on stage, dressed in a suit and with a microphone in hand. He slowly strides down to the ring whilst staring towards the empty ring.

Jericho approaches the ring and clambers up onto the apron. He enters the ring and grabs a microphone from ringside, before he begins to speak...

Jericho: CM Punk, which part of that pathetic rant am I supposed to take seriously? I'm not sure what is the most sad thing about your little speech, whether it's the fact that you had to speak through the titantron, or whether it was the fact that it sounded like it was spoken by an eleven year old, blindly stumbling his way through his speech. You need to learn to shut your mouth Punk, to learn when to speak and when not to. You appear on one of your titantron messages and preach about drinking, preach about drugs and sobriety. Well here's the hint of irony for you Punk; you're not sober. You're not sober because you're drowning in a pool of your own poisoned, deluded, spiel, which I've heard a hundred times before.

Jericho speaks on, unphased by what's going on around him

Jericho: Is this all you have, Punk? Is this angle of being a clean man the only words you can find to tarnish my image? If so, I pity you. I pity you and your miserable existence. Such a lack creativity and coherent thoughts have obviously taken their toll on you, and the product we're left with is an empty shell of a man, producing fragile, moreover, desperate messages to be displayed on the titantron. Speak all you want about how you're sober, Punk, but it doesn't make you any less of a self indulgent, naive moron who foolishly believes that he can beat me on War. I'm the man who's heading to Genesis. Not you. Get used to it.

With a frown, Jericho lowers his mic.

​

 

[Chris Dresdon]

WAR 4/27/11: Kane vs. Undertaker vs. Cena vs. Orton for the IC Championship

[video=youtube;xLrkKW1jcRk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLrkKW1jcRk[/video]

The fans in the arena are excited as "Slow Chemical" by Finger Eleven begins to play, cheering the nearing arrival of Kane and the fond sound of his former theme. Without any hesitation, the Big Red Machine makes his way from the back, where the fans are met with surprise on another matter.

The roof nearly came off of the place as they were witnessing the return of the true Monster. Kane walks up the steel steps, steps onto the apron and walks along it, then steps through the ropes and makes his way to the center of the ring. He signals to the ring announcer to get him a microphone as he raises his arms at his side into the air and drops them, sending fire shooting from all four turnbuckles simultaneously.

The fire burns strongly for a moment before fading out as the lights come back on and Kane is handed a microphone, his music ceasing to play.

Kane: At long last the power has returned. I feel like I've long been locked away in an area of darkness, a darkness unwelcome and uncomforting to me. I can already taste the fear in the air, emanating from all of you, and that makes this all the more satisfying. In several years, I was able to tarnish the image of the beast, take his intimidation away and make him accessible to the mortals that walk this Earth, but when I walked out here tonight, I was able to recapture it all in a matter of seconds. No longer will I accept the limitations placed on mankind, I walk among you but I am not one of you, I am the incarnate of pure evil, and I shall spew my hatred over the entire CWF and bring it to its knees, gasping for breath as its skin pales and it's eyes roll back into its head. For you see, the way it exists in its current form is far weaker than the state I plan to transform it into. These are the days of darkness, the Reign of the Monster, and that reign begins with the Intercontinental Championship.

But the splendor of riches comes at a price, as do all things, but that price will not come from me, but will instead be extracted by me. John Cena too has reverted back to his old ways, trading in the colors that made him a hero in exchange for the street garb that made him a rebel. But what you fail to understand is despite the ruggedness of your appearance and the sting in your words, even the fierceness in your opposition, you are still limited by your eternal positioning as a creature of flesh and blood. Your mortality will be what costs you greatness. I will remove all words from your mouth and all life from your body, so that your motto is a dry and empty as the shell of your corpse when I'm through. You might see that chain as something that ties you to the street, when I see it for what it is, the fine line between life and death. You're sitting on the fence of time, teetering between existing and decomposing, and I am your archangel of death that will deliver you to the side I see fit.

Randy Orton, a snake in a human casing, or so he is deemed. I play my experience at the right hand of the master of deception against the actions of this man, and none of them strike me as serpentile. Your facade of viciousness and pseudo-schizophrenia is an ongoing mockery of the protagonistic order of things, belittling of it in the same way that I once was, and I shall stand for it no longer. Randy, when you feel the cold fingers of death locking around your throat, look into the true face of madness before I plummet you to hell, so that your final thoughts are a realization that you've always been nothing more than what I've called you out to be, a spineless pretender!

And lastly, dear brother, our war is one that has been waged on many battlefields for what seems like centuries. Battles have been won and battles have been lost but it will be a battle no longer. This will be the playing out and writing of the final chapter of our unholy clash, this will be sibling rivalry on a scale inconceivable to all but you and I, and you, big brother, will die. You exist with internal and external darkness, while that surrounding me is unforgiving flame, and it is the light of these embers that will consume your darkness and leave you never heard from again. Then one demon will stand, will the Grail in one hand and the kidnapped souls of his opponents in the other, proclaiming that this...is just the beginning.

Kane breaks out into evil laughter as the fans are silent from fear.​

 

[Aniking]

CWF WAR: 27/04/11 - Christian vs. JBL

[video=youtube;fu5bmrSoVy8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fu5bmrSoVy8[/video]

"GO" is heard in the arena as the crowd all get up onto their feet and cheer. Christian comes out from the back with a smile on his face, happy to hear such a positive reaction. As he walks down the ramp, he high-fives anybody with their hand out, occasionally giving an encouraging word to a young fan. Christian walks over to the steel steps and walks up them, before climbing into the ring. Christian walks over to the opposite side of the ring and is handed a microphone as he takes in the cheers

Christian

So CWF has gone through some, I guess you could say, technical difficulties over the past month, but now it's time to get the ball rolling again. It's a shame that everything went down when it did, because I was looking forward to utilising the No Disqualifications stipulation on my match at Genesis to the fullest. The last time you all saw me inside a CWF ring was when I first debuted, and I enjoyed shutting Eric Bischoff up by hitting the Killswitch on him. He thought Jack Swagger would teach me a lesson at Genesis, but that wasn't how it was going to go down, was it?

Christian looks around at the crowd as they cheer him

But none of that matters anymore, but what does is where I go from here. There's nothing else that I want more than to become a World Champion for the first time in my career, and that's exactly why I came to CWF in the first place. I've always been content to settle for second best in my career, just doing whatever makes all of my peeps happy, but I know that what you all want to see the most is your Captain holding that big gold high. You know what, so do I. I want the CWF World Heavyweight Championship more than anything right now, and I plan on going through whoever is put in front of me. I'm not only doing it for myself, but for all of you as well.

Christian is cheered as he points at the crowd

I think it's time I get down to business. This week I finally make my in-ring debut, in a match that could carry a special reward with it for the winner, and to get that reward I have to go through JBL. This shouldn't be too hard, after all JBL's often seen at his local Krispy Kreme chowing down on their delicious range of donuts, so he may not even show up to WAR. If you don't believe me, wait until he walks down here Monday night with his donut gut hanging over his ring gear, struggling to run the ropes in our match. It's a shame really, JBL used to be one of the most revered and dangerous superstars while a part of the APA, but now he thinks his money can get him anything he wants. If he brings that attitude into our match, I guarantee that you'll see my hand raised by the referee.

The crowd like the sound of Christian beating JBL

If you're a part of my peepulation, and you trust your Captain with every fibre in your body, then you'll take my word. I promise to each and every one of my peeps that when CWF WAR makes it's triumphant return next Wednesday night, I'll be walking out with my sights completely set on becoming the first ever CWF World Heavyweight Champion.

The arm of Christian falls to his side as he beams at the loud cheers he receives from the crowd

​

 

[Lewb]

So.... You Think You're Untouchable?

Instead of "Basic Thuganomics" playing through the arena, a new song is playing out... one fit for the "Doctor" of Thuganomics.

[video=youtube;ZGKo5sCbXqE]ZGKo5sCbXqE[/video]

Out comes John Cena with a microphone in hand and looking ready for action. He looks around at the crowd before fixating his eyes on the Big Red Monster, and starts to spit it.

John Cena

Yo, yo, yo! This is it, my time to freestyle,
You can all compare it how ever much you want to Eight Mile.
I need to let you know what I think, man it's vital.
It's more important than the intercontinental Title!
Not that I won't take it when put in front of me,
It's just the CWF gold is where I want to be.
But, it's not my style to stand out here and moan,
I got a match to worry about with a walking traffic cone!

Now at the bottom of the ramp, Cena storms the ring, and ushers Kane to the side with his hand movements. Cena stands in the middle of the ring and looks direct at Kane.

John Cena

The Big Red Machine, man, close to four hundred pounds,
I wouldn't have a problem taking you for twelve rounds!
You have the size but the brain is weak,
Your head is more useless than when Stephen Hawkins speaks!
When your parents were younger they set you on fire?
They should have finished the job complete with a funeral pyre.
You go around like a headless chicken, Kane, you're all over the place.
But then again, so would I if I had a disfigured face!

The crowd boo, and John Cena looks around at the crowd with a smirk on his face.

John Cena

You know what Kane, these people remind me of you here tonight.
They should all wear a mask too, my god what a sight!
And though they're very similar, they're not exactly the same,
Compared to them your actually pretty tame.
Under that big frame you walk around, theres nothing to be scared of,
Your less scary a big man than Vladimir Kozlov.
The truth is your not what you used to be ten years ago,
The power is running out and you've gone so very slow.
Where-as, I'm John Cena, I was born to do it,
To show you for who you really are you piece of.....

Cena lifts the mic and some of the audience shout "Shit!" Cena waits a few seconds before speaking again.

John Cena

Of course, it's not just the burnt freak in the main event bout,
Theres also Randy Orton and The Undertaker that need a shout out!
The Undertaker, Kanes better brother, but your not that hard,
You need to watch that I won't retire you to a graveyard.
You like people to believe what you say, that your already dead,
There's nothing I'd like to do more than roll those eyes into the back of your head.....

For good!

And Randy Orton, the viper, the apex predator?
With a first name like Randy you sound more like a sexual predator.
You going to inflict the CWF with the Age of Orton,
I'd rather stand on my front door for an hour with a mormon.
And the future for St. Louis, Missouri's "best import".
Well... in a match against John Cena, coming up way short.

All three of you, it's time to realise it's my time,
The I C Belt is coming home with me, I'm at my prime.
And for all of you, your going to make your debut a duck,
But don't ask me what I think about that, because really, I don't give a........

Some of the fans finish off his sentence, but before he has chance to do anything else.....

​

 

[Sam]

WAR 4/27: Shark Boy Vs Triple H

The crowd are silent inside the CWF WAR arena, awaiting something to happen when suddenly...

'GIVE ME A SHELL YEAH!'


[video=youtube;pv8RbRKF3dQ]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv8RbRKF3dQ&feature=related[/video]

Glass shatters and Disturbed's 'Glass Shatters' hits the PA system to the delight of some. Shark Boy walks out from the back and looks around, he shoots out his signature fin salute before stomping down the ramp mouthing off to everyone and everything in sight. He quickly walks up the ring steps and enters the ring leaving a trailing leg behind as he does so. He heads up to the top rope and shoots out his fin salute before stepping down, he heads to the opposite corner and repeats the fin salute. He does this for the other two ring corners before stepping down and receiving the microphone.

Shark Boy:WHAT?!... Shark Boy?, WHAT?!, in the C Dublya F?, WHAT?!... Shell Yeah!, Shark Boy has come to the CWF!. Now for those who you who've forgotten all about Shark Boy from his time in 'the other' company... I'll let you know a few things about Shark Boy. One!, Shark Boy likes beer... Two!, Shark Boy likes huntin'... Three!, Shark Boy likes his pick up truck... and 4th and most important, Shark Boy likes openin' up big cans of bass whip on a weekly basis!. Now if that don't excite ya, I don't know what will!. Now Shark Boy had two long years in 'the other' company, he fought above his weight and he showed everyone that he ain't no joke, I fought in main events of major pay per view events and y'know what?, I intend on doin' it all again here in the Championship Wrestling Federation!.


The crowd who remembers Shark Boy's stint in 'the other' company...

Now Shark Boy's ascent to the top begins this week on WAR. Shark Boy's show!. And his opponent is a man he's ran into in the past on several occasions, not that he'll remember them of course, he's probably busy with bein' the King of King's an' all. Regardless of whether he remembers Shark Boy or not, I intend on letting him know exactly what I'm all about by whippin' his bass all over this arena. Then what I plan on doin' is openin' up a shark-weiser or ten, dowinin' them sumbitches, then I'm gonna get in my truck and drive on down to a bar, drink some more, then I'm gonna come back next week, teach whatever poor bastard ends up in the ring a lesson, and repeat until I get what I've craved for many many years... the World Heavyweight Championship... and if you want to see Shark Boy where some gold, give me a Shell Yeah!.

SHELL YEAH!!!.

Damn right, so Triple H, you come down to this ring and you spit your water into the air, because it's gonna be teeth yer spittin' out when Shark Boy whips yer sorry bass this week on WAR... and that's the fishin' line... WHY?... because Shark Boy said so!.
​

 

[Doink]

Wednesday Night WAR - Cody Rhodes V Samoa Joe

[video=youtube;r2fK7-N71Ic]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2fK7-N71Ic[/video]

Cody Rhodes' entrance theme hits the PA system much to the fans dislike. Cody smirks and turns round to face the titantron looking at his 'dashing' face. He slowly walks down the ramp and he ignores the boos from the fans.

He climbs up the steel steps and gets into the ring. He picks up the mic that was laid out for him and starts to chuckle

Cody Rhodes: What is this? I can't believe what I'm hearing. Before the restart of CWF, I was in a title match that I was obviously going to win and now I am facing the regular customer of Burger King. I mean seriously when you hear of people who have never seen a salad, Joe is the prime example of that.

Cody rakes in a massive amount of boos from the CWF Universe making it obvious that he is back to being hated.

Cody Rhodes: Why are you booing me? Oh I get it, Joe reminds you of yourselves. Horrible, Fat & Ugly. Now I am more athletic than Joe. I have more charisma and I am simpy dashing. Now, I am sure that you would all like to be as dashing as I am but it is just not in your genes. However, I am prepared to give you some tips on how to be close.

Cody is yet again booed by the crowd and Cody gets annoyed by this.

Cody Rhodes: Well, firstly you can actually get up and do some excersise. That is a good start. Then actually eat a balanced diet, don't be like Joe and spend your life eating fast food.​