Chuck Taylor's Grenade
Guest
Warning: The views expressed by Chuck Taylor's Grenade do not necessarily reflect those of IWF or its members. This rant contains strong opinions and harsh language. If you can't handle it I suggest you go read another thread. Or you know...grow a functioning set of testicles.
Ok, you all saw the disclaimer, let's get started. Last year around this time I posted a rant about the things I thought were wrong with wrestling (which you can read here-http://www.impactwrestling.com/forum/showthread.php?p=388681#post388681). A year has passed and it's time for round two. A lot has happened in the past year to fuel my rage. More things about wrestling are pissing me off. Let's dive in
Number 1: Wrestlers can't talk
When was the last time someone cut a promo that people remembered? I seriously can't remember. Most promos go in one ear and out the other. There's nothing to remember about them. Very few wrestlers are able to grab the audience with words. And that's part of the reason none of the mid carders have broken through to the main event. Part of being a draw and a main eventer is being able to talk the people into the arena and captivate the audience simply by talking. I'll freely admit that Miz is probably the best talker out of all the midcarders. Blame who you want for that-writers, wrestlers, whatever but I'll say one thing you can't blame it on which brings me to.
Number 2: The PG rating is not the problem
Seriously. If you think the PG rating is the biggest problem about WWE you're so wrong it's not even funny. If you think that it is impossible for a wrestling show to be entertaining and profitable with a PG rating I give you two examples-Chikara (which is way cleaner than WWE) and WCW (Oh yes they were PG during the height of their popularity). The PG rating means two things-you can't use any of George Carlin's 7 dirty words and no insane violence. Considering that WWE is completely safe now that's not a problem. It's safer which means wrestlers careers should (keyword: should) last longer. As far as the no blood rule goes that's the only thing I don't like about WWE being PG. However, I do feel that blood should be a rare thing in wrestling so that it has more meaning when it actually happened. If you have a wrestling show and in the third match on the card someone blades and then in the main event someone else blades do you even care if the main event has blood if you just saw blood earlier? As far as wrestlers not being able to sound like New Jack or Zandig when their cutting promos that's perfectly fine by me. All it means is that wrestlers have to be more creative with their promos. Now I know what you're thinking if the WWE being PG isn't the problem what is? Well...
Number 3: WWE is as stale as a week old doughnut.
When I don't even have to watch Raw and I can predict over half of the segments that take place something is wrong. It's the same thing every week and that's the problem. There's nothing to get people excited or hook them to tune in next week. Even with a different guest host each week it's always the same-Guest host makes a speech to open raw;John Cena talks about training, saying his raps, and taking his vitamins; DX has a stupid skit; John Cena squashes a once promising mid carder; and ad infinitum. It's like being stuck in the movie Groundhog Day. Not to mention we've seen the same 6 people in the main event scene for the past 4 years with very few outside exceptions. Holy fuck. If you thought WCW was bad having the same guys in the main event all the time WCW ain't got shit on the WWE right now. So why is WWE so stale? Here's the answer and it brings me to number four.
Number four: The writing teams suck
This one is really no big secret. WWE's writing staff is so incompetent and full of idiots it defies description. That's why nobody has broken through to the main event. That's why WWE is so stale. The people writing for WWE have no clue how to write wrestling shows. The same could be said about TNA. TNA's writing has been piss poor for a long time now. There is no logic to be found anywhere in a TNA show. One week two people will be mortal enemies next week their teaming together and a week after that they're mortal enemies again. It's like watching a show written by ADD patients. WWE is the same way except with pushes. One week their pushing somebody the next they got them jobbing to hornswoggle. It makes no sense and really desensitizes the audience because it makes people think “why should I care to get behind somebody if they aren't going to do anything with it?” If WWE wants to fix their lack of legit main eventers this is what they need to do. Put some of their employees in the crowd in different parts of the arenas with notepads to keep track of which wrestlers get the best reactions.
Number five: Using a band-aid to fix a shotgun wound
Allow me to explain. First off all this is mainly a gripe aimed at TNA. And this one has been going on for quite some time. TNA seems to think the solution to their problems is to sign /Insert major star dujour here/. Newsflash: it's not. Let's take a trip back to the year 1997. The Spice Girls are at the top of the billboard charts, Seinfeld is a top rated show and oh yeah there was that whole Bret Hart jumping to WCW along with the screwjob thing. When Bret Hart jumped to WCW everyone thought it was the end for WWE. In reality it should have been. Bret Hart for all intentions should have been the biggest babyface in the history of wrestling in WCW. Instead for whatever reason (translation: politics) Bret's WCW run was completely botched. Now what does this have to do with TNA? The main point of going off on that tangent was that just because someone was successful and a draw for one company doesn't mean they'll do the same thing with another. We've seen the same thing over and over and over again every time TNA signs some big name thinking that's what's gonna push them to the next level. How many times do I have to explain this? You can sign all the big names you want (believe me TNA is certainly trying to) it doesn't make an ounce of difference if A: the storylines are crap or B: the wrestling is crap. Whether you like it or not wrestling is storyline and feud driven. Without good storylines and feuds to hook the audience ratings will stay the same because there's nothing to pull people in.
Number six: The lost art of the feud
There was a time when two wrestlers could have a feud and both wrestlers end up being held in a higher regard. Same thing with pushes. It seems to me unless somebody wins every match they're getting buried. This is professional wrestling-since when did winning get to be so important? I thought the point was to entertain the crowd so they want to come back either to the arena or to the television shows. In a well done feud it really does not matter who wins and loses because both parties end up looking better than they did going in. At least that's the way it should be. Now it seems like feuds are either abandoned for no reason, one wrestler ends up completely buried, or the payoff fizzles. Remember when you used to watch feuds with that “oh shit son, this isn't gonna end unless somebody dies” mentality? It was great. It made you want to tune in to see what would happen next. Now feuds have no meaning unless it's for a title. Look at an average WWE payperview and play a game I like to call "spot the feud that doesn't involve a belt". Very rarely will a feud get a blowoff match (or a match period) on a payperview.
That's about it for now. Those are the main six things that cause me to want to punch small children in the face. I'm sure the rest of you have different things that piss you off about the current state of wrestling and I'd love to see them as well as feedback on this rant.
