Calling Shots with Curt Hawkins

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Tapout

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UWF.COM Proudly presents:

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And now, here is your host, the one the only, Curt Hawkins!

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Curt Hawkins
Welcome, welcome ladies and germs to the new internet sensation, Calling Shots with Me, Curt Hawkins. Now over the years many superstars have tried to conquer the interwebs in their own search of internet stardom. So I figured I would throw my name into that hat with this very show. Now, if you're thinking to yourself right now, "I wonder what this show will be about." Then think no further for I have all your answers. On this show I will look back on the UWF Week, on Smackdown, NXT and The Curt Hawkins show..opps, I mean Raw and I will be going through and picking out the best parts of the shows, and the worst. I'll also give commentary on current happenings in the UWF, along with many other segments. Which brings us to our first segment today, Who's That Superstar!

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Curt Hawkins
If your answers were anything along the lines of: Who cares, irrelevant, no body, or boring then Ding Ding Ding! We have ourselves a winner folks! Now please, if you could, drop the mask to reveal who this superstar really is. Drum roll please!

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Curt Hawkins
It's Antonio Cesaro! OUR United States Champion. Man is that guy something. I mean hes so good at...but he had that one match with...and he does that one thing...and..well he just flat out sucks! Newsflash there Giant Nipples, the fans aren't booing you because you're a bad guy or anything, they're booing you because you're just straight up boring. You can call yourself "Technically Gifted" all you want but your only gift if putting people to sleep. They should call you the Sandman.

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Curt Hawkins
No, not that Sandman...He was one of those types of guys that just made you say..What the Hell? Which leads into another segment, the What the Hell Moment of the Week!

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Curt Hawkins
Here in the UWF we are bound to have some moments that just leave your head a scratching and your brain a wantin' more and thats just want went down at the end of Smackdown last night. Roll the clip!

Cena seems poised to deliver an Attitude Adjustment but before he can, he is taken down from behind…

Piper: Now what?

JR: Is that? It’s…Robert Roode?


Roode just struck Cena with the Pay Off Lariat in the back of Cena’s head, causing the Cenation Leader to drop Christian. Cena drops to a knee and Roode looks to pick the bones. Roode grabs Cena and lifts him off the canvas, hitting the Double R Spinebuster. As Cena gets taken out, the World Heavyweight Champion finally begins to show signs of life. As Ambrose tries to get to his feet, Christian hooks both of the Champion’s arms from behind before spinning around and hitting the Killswitch on Smackdown’s World Champion. The heat continues to rain down on Roode and Hardy as the climb the top rope and mock all of the Smackdown fans…

JR: I can’t believe this! Two Raw guys have taken out two of Smackdown’s best guys!

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Smackdown goes off the air with Christian and Robert Roode standing all as the cameras pan over the lifeless bodies of John Cena, Jeff Hardy and Dean Ambrose.

Curt Hawkins
You saw it second here folks, Christian and Robert Roode declaring War on Smackdown. Now, I don't have a problem with that, seeing as Raw is the number one show in the UWF but we are still left with the question of...What the Hell?

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Curt Hawkins
That was your "What the Hell?" Moment of the week, and now I'll like to send us off with the last segment of today, the NXT Prediction of the Week...It's gonna suck. Thank you for joining me, The Party Starter, Curt Hawkins for Calling Shots, Episode One. If you liked what you saw you can hit like, live a comment, subscribe, and Like me on Facebook, Follow Me on...Wait, what am I doing, I'm not that desperate. Just be sure to tune in next Wednesday for your weekly does of Calling Shots. I'm your host, Curt Hawkins, Party On.


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Will be done every Wednesday. Will most likely post all in the same thread. Feel free to comment.​
 

Cwalker

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Made me chuckle, which was definitely needed.

Very good Tap. Hope you keep it up.
 

Chase

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Robert Roode is shown backstage after watching this segment

Robert Roode: What the hell was that? Did I Robert Roode finally get some recognition of what I am doing here in the UWF? It is about damn time someone figured out what the IT FACTOR has done here in the UWF. Curt Hawkins I along with my associate Christian would like to thank you... thank you for recognizing what two great talents we are in this ring, and how we deserve to be recognized for taking down those two posers in Cena and Ambrose. I can guarantee you this Hawkins the IT FACTOR Robert Roode will be looking to add some more what the hell moments to the resume. You can bank on that.