TNT 11/1/10: Yokozuna vs. "The Icon" Slim

[Chris Dresdon]

The camera pans to an area backstage where Yokozuna is standing in front of a multi-colored backdrop, his hands at his sides and a very serious look on his face.

Yokozuna:What I'm feeling right now is impossible to describe, I still have such a rush going. My first match in a decade on the very first edition of Tuesday Night Turbulence, and I won as I vowed to, in the fashion that I forewarned of. It felt great to be back in that atmosphere and that environment, especially since I got my hands on the biggest joke in the history of wrestling and hit him with not one, but two vicious Banzai Drops. But that was last week...

This week it's a different ballgame because now things are underway around here. The first impressions have been made, the second ever edition of Turbulence and onward will be the sink or swim period. This time around I compete in singles action against someone else that had a successful debut, "The Icon" Slim. Self-gratifying titles like that are used too loosely in this sport, much like "King", because the people that don them are usually looking to give their name face value, whether they've earned the right to carry it or not.

Slim, I've never heard of you prior to UWF, so I think it's safe to say that you've done nothing in your career to earn the right to call yourself an icon. What you have earned yourself the right to do is try and prove me wrong. You can pick up a microphone and tell me, why it's a fitting title and no one should question it. Tell me, why you demand so much respect when this seems to be your first wrestling venture. Better yet, tell me that you're going to beat me.

I weigh 650 pounds Slim, 650 POUNDS. Forget the Big Show and the Great Khali, I am the true world's largest athlete and I intend to prove that, and not by my sheer appearance alone, I plan to prove it in our match. So come on, you have your invitation to man up and stand face-to-face with the Samoan Juggernaut. Meet me in the ring Icon, if you have the backbone.

Yokozuna looks at the camera silently for a moment then walks offscreen​

 

[Slim]

The scene opens to the front steps of a very lavish looking house. On those steps sits the man that was victorious last week on Turbulence. He sits rather relaxed on the steps looking out down the long driveway. He looks to his right and sees his nice blue car parked in the yard. He looks towards the right and sees his wife’s red car. He pulls the hood off of his head and looks straight forward with a grin.

Slim: You know big man, you boast about being off for ten years and how you don’t know a thing about me. But understand that in those years you were off the scene was when I arrived. You can talk about me not accomplishing anything but in the end all that does is show your complete and utter ignorance of anything outside of you. I’ve been in the business for years and this will be my eighth year. And you know the same ignorance can be used against you since before WWF nobody knew you and after you left nobody gave two shits about you until you showed up here.

And it is ignorance like that which will lead to your downfall. For you’re blinded by your mere size and feel that will be the thing that intimidates me and allows you the chance to have some sort of psychological advantage over me. You have to understand I’ve been through it all, I’ve seen it all. I may not have seen anyone as fat as you but I’ve seen a lot in my years Yoko and from what I’ve seen from your match, you’re not that impressive. You just know how to climb up to the middle rope, jump off, and sit on people.

Slim gives a sarcastic applause as he gets up to his feet. His grin starts to disappear as he holds his hands together.

Slim: You definitely have the size advantage and power advantage but with my years of experience I know there is more than one way to get you down and finish you off. Your ego is blinding you and you do not even realize it. Instead you believe it to be confidence and it is because of that you feel that no matter what is done, no matter what is said you will hold the advantage over someone like me.

But soon the realization will set in. Soon the rose tinted glasses that you’re wearing that allows you to see everything in such a pretty light that you’re seeing now will be broken. The truth will always come out in due time and sometimes it will be extremely difficult to swallow but looking at you it seems you don’t have much trouble swallowing anything. So come Turbulence, prepare to swallow your pride as you will become just another victim.

Slim walks towards his car and gets in as the scene fades to black.​

 

[Chris Dresdon]

Yokozuna:What is this Slim, MTV Cribs? Because I thought it was wrestling. You stand there in front of your lavish house amongst your flashy cars and have the nerve to tell me that I'm the one blinded by ego, that I'm the one blinded by the pretty light my world appears in. If anyone's wearing rose tinted glasses, it's not me, it's you. You like to think of yourself as this big star when you've done nothing in UWF but win your first match. So you've been doing this for eight years, big deal. All that was small time, all of that was preparation for the here and now. But that's alright Slim, because those glasses are going to work against you for the worst. I'm not going to smack them off of your face, but I'm going to drive them straight into the bridge of your nose and your eyes.

You aren't impressed by me? That's alright because you aren't that impressive either, to the point that I don't think you're in this for the physical aspect of it, just the showmanship. You can't give blood, sweat, and tears if your mind's too clouded with the glitz and glamour. But that's alright too, because if your sole desire is to be fly and flashy, then I have no problem using you as a stepping stone to the upper echelon. You might not be intimidated now, but I assure you that's all going to change when you're lying on the mat and you see more than a ton coming flying towards you with only one sound entering your eardrums besides the cheers of the thousands watching, BAAAAAANZAAAAAAI!​

 

[Slim]

Slim is seen sitting outside of a restaurant with his shades over his eyes as the camera shines on him.

Slim: Ill informed and misconstrued interpretations is what I hear from you Yoko. Not only that but your pitiful attempt to twist my words and push them upon myself? Not only is that the oldest most elementary trick in the book, the most basic of basic but sadly you even screwed that one up. How you managed to do that I’ve yet to figure out but you did it. And through all your tangled web of words you came to the fallacious conclusion that I’m in this for the showmanship? That I can’t give the blood, the sweat, the tears for this business? That I’m just some fly and flashy guy?

Well fly I am. I have style unlike another. Flashy? Far from it. But blood and sweat… I’ve broken my body for this business. I’ve just about given my life for this business on more than one occasion.

Slim’s calm demeanor faded quickly as he removes his shades and sets them on the table.

Slim: You look and act like you’re this high and mighty overlord because you were a champion in the WWF… but I’ma tell you right now that I don’t give a fuck what you did in WWF. And I don’t give a fuck what you’ve done in UFW thus far with your win over that sperm bank. What you’re getting into right now is a war against a real man. One that will not back down, one that will not give up, one that will give anything and everything he has for this business!

You Yoko, are going to be battling long and hard. You bring your Banzai drop and I’ll tell you right now… if it won’t kill me, it won’t be strong enough to stop me.

Slim reaches for his shades, puts them back on, gets up from his chair and walks away as the scene fades.​

 

[Chris Dresdon]

The camera pans to inside of the UWF arena where Yokozuna is standing inside the ring.

Yokozuna:I don't know who you're trying to impress, Icon, but I'm not buying into your facade. I stand by what I say, you're nothing but a flash in the pan. I don't say that because of the WWF championship notch on my sizeable belt, and I don't say that because of my demolition of UWF's biggest joke, I say that because it's the truth. But I tire of the same old back and forth of me saying you've done nothing in this business and you proclaiming that you've done a tremendous amount, because it's boring. You want a war? Consider your wish my command, because it's a war you've got. Just a warning before any shots are fired, you're getting in over your head. I'm going to hold you to your claims. You say you've sweat for this business, well prepare to perspirate until you dehydrate. You say you've bled for this business, well get ready for the Samoan Blood Drive, because I'm going to leave every drop you have on this mat. Something you didn't address was tears, but that's alright because you'll be shedding those too, until your tear duct is as dry as the Sahara desert.

You haven't felt your body break for this business until you've been in the ring with someone that outweighs you, overpowers you, and flat out manhandles you like I do and vow to do. As for giving your life, you'll walk into Turbulence the "Icon", but you'll be stretchered out an athletic martyr, dying for a sport rather than a religious cause. One Banzai Drop might not kill you, two might not even put you away. In fact if I were to take a guess, I'd say not even three would keep you down for the three count. So on Tuesday night we're going to see just how many Banzai Drops I have to connect with before you can tack an 'e' to the end of your name and call yourself "Slime", because that's what you'll look like once I'm finished, liquid on the mat. If none of that bothers you, and you still aren't impressed or intimidated, come on down here. Drive your fancy car to the arena, park it, and walk yourself down that ramp and stare into the eyes of Yokozuna, sans those shades if you have the guts. This is your final invitation, Slim.​

 

[Slim]

OOC: Sorry I won't be able to get another one in. My time is too stretched to get one in.

 

[Chris Dresdon]

OOC: No problem, it was a lot of fun, man. Good to TT with you again.

 

[Slim]

yeah... and next time... ohhh next time it will be a thing of beauty.