here are some funny quotes:
Bart: Hello, is Homer there?
Moe: Homer who?
Bart: Homer...Sexual.
Moe: Wait one second, let me check. [calls] Uh, Homer Sexual? Hey, come on, come on, one of you guys has got to be "Homosexual"!
Homer: Don't look at me! [guffaws from the gang]
Moe: You rotten liver pot! If I ever get a hold of you, I'll sink my teeth into your cheek and rip your face off!
Skinner: You'll do what, young man?
Moe: Oh, Principal Skinner. Must be a bad connection. Homer, I think Bart's in trouble again.
Homer: D'oh!
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Homer: Come, family. Sit in the snow with Daddy and let us all bask in TV's warm glowing warming glow.
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Homer: Son, I just want you to know I have total faith in you.
Bart: Since when?
Homer: Since your mother yelled at me
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Homer: Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling, foxy boxing and such and such
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Bart: Mom! You are a Jesus of Carpentry!
Marge: Oh! What a sweet blasphemy son.
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Marge : im going into the dining room to have a conversation, anyone who wants to join me is welcome. (no joins)
Marge talks to self : Hello marge how the family?, i dont wanna talk about them.
Homer : Keep it quiet in there EVERYONE
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Homer: Well, Marge. You have to admit I've been on my best behavior.
Marge: You punched three people on the way over here.
Homer: That was over football results. Can you believe they gave Giggs a yellow card in the box?
Marge: Do you understand any part of what you just said?
Homer: I understand the word "gave"...unless it means something else in this country!