Welcome to another edition of the best, and only, column here on the IWF, The No Smark Zone. I hope everyone is enjoying their spring breaks, as I know I am. Everyone be good for another day or so, and you may get a treat from the Easter Bunny, or we can just agree that my column is better than any colored eggs or god awful marshmallow peeps you could ever get. That way, you can smoke, drink, and bang all the hookers you want without fear of repercussion. First out of the gate this week is Stu Finer, our resident handicapper, who is here to make you a very rich man come Wrestlemania Sunday.
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLADIES AND GENTLEMAN, BOYS AND GIRLS AND GAMBLING DEGENEATES, this is yo boyeeeeeee Stu Finer here to make you the richest man, woman, or quadraped on your block! Coming up we have the biggest PPV that we see all year, WRESTLEMANIA! And it is the best time to reel you man in and take him for all he’s worth. Sure none of these matches are actually on the board in Vegas, but that’s because THEY ARE AFRAID TO LOSE TO THE FINE(R)ST MAN IN THE GAME. Forget football, forget baseball, and lets face it, who cares about basketball. Who would pay to watch a bunch of convicts smile and wave to the crowd besides TNA fans, Chicago Bear fans, and Cincinnati Bengals fans!? This is wrestling, this is the sport of kings, and next Sunday, at Wrestlemania, it is going to be YOUR LUCKY DAY! I know, I know, I know what you are gonna say, “Stu, you were only 3-2 at the Royal Rumble, I lost a lot of money on that big 30 man match.†Yeah yeah yeah, I know, but heres whatcha gotta know. Gambling is a long term investment, I have never said it was anything but that. Sometimes you have to Muhammed Ali your man and then STRIKE HIM when he’s at his weakest. Now that I’ve got your confidence up, ARE YOU READY FOR A SHORT TERM INVESTMENT THAT WILL MAKE YOU RICHER THAN THAT TRANSVESTITE AND HIS DRUG ADDICTED FAMILY ON FX!? Time for the picks…
24 Man Interbrand Battle Royal for a Shot at the ECW Title/ECW Title Match
Now, I know I didn’t do so well last time when picking a battle royal winner, but I think the WWE sabotaged me. They saw how much action I was getting, and how much money their secret bookies would be losing, and they decided to shoot Cena full of juice, pain killers, OJ, and who knows what else, just to get him back at the Rumble just to screw yo boyyeee over. But this time, ah ha ha, there will be no surprises. I know youre saying “How can you say that? All of the participants haven’t been announced.†But the only man who has a chance in hell of coming back and winning this is Matt Hardy and he is busy going through the rubble of brother Jeff’s house, helping him look for his stash of meth. So forget him. We have a lot of heavy hitters in this one. The Great Khali (which in Punjabi translates into “The Great Company Lies For Meâ€), Mark Henry, Kane, and Big Daddy V, the man who’s love of nacho’s has spread back to his home town of Fat Assia. There are also some smaller guys who are sure to be in it, guys like Charlie Haas, Rory McCallister, Jamie Noble, Chuck Palumbo, Cody Rhodes, Hardcore Holly, and WWE’s brightest new star, Kofi Kingston. So with all of this firepower in the match, who is going to win? The so called “smart money†is on one of the smaller guys because statistically, the big man has little success in past battle royals. But I am going to say forget all that NONSENSE, we are going to have a big man win it! We have the man who has been underused since his career started in the WWE. He is a man who was brought in simply to put over someone else, yet got over himself and that man is Kane. Yeah, Stu hears you, yeah Stu knows you think “Kane never wins†which is EXACTLY why the time is now to sink your money into the big red machine. Here is something I bet you didn’t know, not only is Kane batting a thousand against Chavo ALL TIME in their careers, look at the names “Chavo Guerrero†and the “Big Red Machineâ€. That’s 13 letters in Chavo’s name and 13 letters in Kane’s nickname. Big men who face little men at a PPV immediately following a battle royal, AND who’s name would come before his opponents alphabetically, is an astounding 157-0 all time PPV.
Winner of both matches: Kane
7 Man Money In The Bank Ladder Match
This was originally supposed to be an 8 man match. But thanks to the drug taking, house burning, no selling machine known as Jeff Hardy, it has become a 7 man match. It sucks for the fans, but is great for YOU the degenerate gambler. It makes the odds better for your pick, really my pick, and boy do I have a pick for you. This is my *****, silver bullet pick of the month. IF YOU DO NOT get on this pick, and I mean RIDE IT like Lita rides wrestlers who are married, YOU ARE GOING TO LOOK LIKE A CHUMP STAIN! Get on this pick, get out of that Prius, and get in the fast lane with Mister Ken Kennedy! Forget about Carlito, he’s still wiping the bird shit out his hair. MVP? He’s going to be too busy posing to the crowd to get anything done. Shelton Benjamin? Don’t make me laugh! The only GOLD he is ever going to see is in his HAIR. John Morrison? By the time his slow motion entrance is done, THE MATCH WILL BE OVER! KYJ? Ryan Seacrest came up with the idea 4 years ago. He didn’t win then, and he is not going to win now. That brings us to the sXe superstar, CM Punk. What chance does a man who cant do a shot of Vodka before a match have? No, this years pick is Mr. Kennedy. That’s right, the cheesehead is going to win it again. I know, I know, I know Kennedy won it last year and I know he blew it but this year, this is the year of Kennedy because he has more than just skill, luck, or providence on his side, he has….FAVRE. That’s right, I said it, Brett Favre! No, he wont be at ringside but check this out…when did Brett Favre make his Green Bay Packer debut? 1992 and that year, who won the first WWF Ladder Match? Bret “The Hitman†Hart. Guys in ladder matches in years where Brett Favre makes a historic move in football, AND who currently reside in the Midwestern part of North America, are a historic 73-9 all time! JUMP ON KEN, JUMP ON KENNEDY, JUMP ON KEN KENNEDY!
Winner: Ken Kennedy
Batista vs. Umaga, Smackdown vs. Raw
You know, good ol JR has a name for these kind of matches. He calls them “bowling shoe uglyâ€. I don’t think it is going to be anywhere near as bad as say Khali vs. Snitsky would be, but make no mistake about it, this is going to be a straight up brawl with wo powerhouses going at it. These are usually the hardest matches to predict since both guys are so even. It’s like the All NFC vs. the All AFC in Madden, it’s a mirror match. But have no fear, Stu Finer is here! I have the best research associates that an empty promise of advancement in a Fortune 1,000,000 company can offer. They work round the clock giving me the inside edge so I can give it to you. And here it is….Batista. Batista, Batista, Batista. SD is 61-6 in interpromotional battles all time and wins 99% of the matches when they are at Wrestlemania. Sell your blood, sell your house, sell your car, hell, sell your mother into something she probably doesn’t want to do and tell her “Ma, I’ll BUY YOU a therapist after I cash in on Batista over Umaga!â€
Winner: Batista
Finlay vs. JBL in a Belfast Brawl
This is going to be another ugly match, but not for the reasons stated before. These guys just plain don’t like each other. It’s like the Raiders playing anyone in the 80s, it got dirty and it got personal and that is what is going to happen here. Look for cheap shots, golf clubs, hell even a kitchen sink to get tossed around in this one. Now JBL thinks he is a big man on Wallstreet, but I will tell you this, STU FINER MAKES MORE MONEY ON ONE PICK THAN JBL MAKES IN A MONTH! That’s right! If I woke up one day with JBLs money, I would think about killing myself. Then, Id listen to Stu Finer, and double, triple, and quadruple my income, ALL IN ONE NIGHT! Now onto the pick. JBL is facing the Irishman Finlay. We are just coming off of what holiday? St. Patricks Day! Look for Finlay to be Guinness fueled and look for him to get the straight up win OVER JBL.
Winner: Finlay
The Big Show vs. Floyd “Money†Mayweather
This is the battle of a Wrestlemania Virgin vs. a Wrestlemania Whore. That’s right, Big Show is a WHORE when it comes to Mania. The question isn’t who has Big Show BEATEN at Wrestlemania, its “Who has he LOST to at Wrestlemaniaâ€. Sumo wrestlers, rappers, red fried freaks, hardcore jabroni’s, a cut and runner, a fat author, and a man who is one more title reign away from calling himself JESUS CHRIST is the short list of losses on Shows record. But oh man, this year its different. This year he has Money Mayweather. A guy half his size, half his weight, and a man who doesn’t know a wrestling ring from an onion ring. Floyd Maywether is dumber than Mike Tysons brain dead lovechild with the daughter of Timmy from South Park. So not only is he undersized, not only is he stupid, he’s arrogant. Ask the New England Patriots if being cocky is the best thing to do. And by the way, guess who was the first man to predict the Giants upsetting the Pats? That’s right, STU F*CKING FINER! Bottom line is, I don’t like Mayweather, he’s small, he’s dumb, he’s cocky, and he’s RIPE for the picking. JUMP ON THE BIG SHOW AT WRRRRRRRESTLEMANIA!
Winner: The Big Show
Playboy Tag Team Match
Let’s face it, the only person who really cares about this match is the guy who gets to be in there in all the hot diva action, Snoop Dogg. So I’m not even going to predict a winner because IF YOU ARE BETTING ON WOMENS WRESTLING, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
Edge vs. The Undertaker for the World Heavyweight Title
Oh boy is this the motherload. Streak vs. Title. Student vs. Teacher. Canadian vs. The Dead. This match could make a good Mania great, and a great Mania HISTORIC. The WWE has been shitting all over the build up to this match but let it be known that it doesn’t matter because when it comes down to go time, these guys will produce. JUST LIKE your boyee Stu Finer. Now the so called easy money is on Undertaker because he has the streak behind him. He has decades of experience and literally thousands more matches than his opponent. Knowing all of that, I am going with EDGE. That’s right, EDGE has the EDGE, and here is the EDGE that EDGE has. The Rated R Superstar is facing The Deadman for the first time at a WM this year. Does anyone know the corpse to Canadian ratio at the granddaddy of them all!? PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN only Stu Finer knows because I have a crack research team. Canadian wrestlers taking on corpses at Wrestlemania, are an amazing 296-1 all time PPV. That’s right, take this info but shhhhhhh shhhhhhhh shhhhhhh keep it to yourself. But remember that stat, when you plop down 10gs on Edge over The Undertaker!
Winner: Edge
Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels in a Career Threatening Match
You know there were a lot of guys saying Brett Favre should have retired long before he did, and these two men are no strangers to that. These are two men who are past their prime, one way further than the other. But here they are, at Wrestlemania, just begging you to bet on their match. Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels are practically saying “Here, I want to send your kids through college, build you a 10 bedroom house, and get you hookers that ELLIOT SPITZER couldn’t afford!†But how are they doing it? I hear all of you asking it right now. How are they doing it? How ARENT they doing it. Did you matches at Mania with guys 5 years or more past their prime favor the blonder of the two? Did you also know that the older Ric Flair gets, the saggier his moobs become. The saggier they are, the more chance there is that they will lactate all over the ring, raising the chances that HBK will slip when he is trying to deliver Sweet Chin Music. Bottom line, bet the cow, the horse, the pigs, chickens, and horses on RIC FLAIR at Wrestlemania 25.
Winner: Ric Flair
John Cena vs. HHH vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Title
Now we come to the main event of the evening. Three men who want nothing but to be champion. But only one of them really has a chance. Randy Orton suffers from Mayweather Sybdrome, cockiness with no proven track record. Orton has only won at ONE of the 24 Wrestlemania’s and that is a sorry record. The only thing worse than Randy Orton’s Mania record, is RVD’s arrest record. Not only does his record suck at Mania, he is not a triple threat monster. Randy Orton, in matches with guys whose name is part of the match name, IE ‘TRIPLE’ H, is a pathetic 3-71 all time. Don’t let your money get anywhere near him. The last two men in the match, John Cena and HHH, have their own legacy at Wrestlemania. John Cena is undefeated, HHH has lost at every one he has been in since Wrestlemania 20, all of them title matches. Cena has defeated The Big Show, HBK, and HHH himself. HHH has LOST to Chris Benoit, Batista, and John Cena. The bookies who refuse to put this on the boards in Vegas would have you bet on Cena, but NO, NO, NO! I’m not doing it, don’t you do it either! HHH is going to win, and he is going to win for ONE SIMPLE REASON. The law of averages. That’s right. Wrestlers, in the main event of PPVs in March who are banging the bosses daughter and have sired him one grandchild with another on the way have NEVER gone more than 0-3 in a streak. According to my stats, HHH is due, he is due big, and he is going to make all of your dreams COME TRUE!
Winner: HHH
THERE YOU HAVE IT FOLKS Stu Finers time tested Wrestlemania picks. I picked these matches JUST for you, and when you are rollin down the street in your Escalade to your bookies house so he can give you the fat cash, YOU TELL HIM STEWIE SENT YA!
Phew, that guy is full of energy isn’t he? Well now that we have made ourselves millions of dollars, lets get on with Kaedon’s YBTB Challenge. Switchy accepted the challenge but didn’t show up by the count of 10 so he has forefitted his title. He will, however, receive the first match after we determine the new champ. This week we have Monkeystyles and CMS along with our judges Soulpower, The Leviathan, and myself.
I asked MS and CMS to book a TNA Invasion of the WWE, and here is what they did, starting with CMS.
Current Champions:
WWE Champion: Triple H
World Heavyweight Champion: The Undertaker
ECW Champion: CM Punk
TNA Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle
Intercontinental Champion: Chris Jericho
US Champion: MVP
X-Division Champion: Jay Lethal
WWE Tag Team Champions: Jesse & Festus
World Tag Team Champions: The Hardys(Jeff and Matt reunited after Matt’s failed attempts for the US Title and Jeff coming back from suspension)
TNA Tag Team Champions: Motor City Machine Guns
WWE Women’s Champion: Mickie James
TNA Knockout’s Champion: Amazing Kong
MITB: Chris Jericho
Sunday 5th, October 2008: No Mercy PPV
The Undertaker retains his WHC against Big Show
CM Punk defeats Shelton Benjamin to retain the ECW Title
John Cena defeats Triple H by making him tap, becoming the WWE Title
- After the match, Kurt Angle comes out with a TNA shirt and the TNA World Title.
He beats up the celebrating John Cena. He calls someone from backstage, and the
TNA roster (except for Christian Cage and the already determined in stips) come
out and beat up both Triple H and John Cena.
Monday 6th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Kurt Angle comes out with rest of TNA wrestlers. He cuts a promo by saying how
TNA might be now own by WWE, but their spirit doesn’t, and they will keep it alive, and will make WWE explode from the inside out. He says he was in the WCW/ECW invasion, and knows what and what not to do, and will lead this alliance. Vince comes out with a group of WWE wrestlers to protect himself. He argues with Kurt. Angle then invites any WWE superstar to accept a match against one of his own. Triple H comes out and accepts. Angle says how fitting it is, as his opponent will be Booker T. A brawl between Booker and HHH start, then followed by the rest of TNA/WWE wrestlers. Kurt and Vince get out of the ring.
Mickie James/Candice Michelle defeat Beth Phoenix/Melina. Afterwards Amazing King, Gail Kim, ODB, Salinas, Angelina Love, Traci Brooks, Velvet Sky and Jacqueline attack. Maria, Ashley, Kelly-Kelly, Torrie Wilson, Layla, Michelle McCool and Eve try to make the save, but the TNA knockouts win the brawl
Triple H defeats Booker T by DQ as Angle interferes. Both Angle and Booker go to attack HHH but John Cena comes out and makes the save.
Tuesday 7th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- CM Punk cuts a promo saying that with all the melee going on ECW. One thing remains the same, he is ECW Champion. Shelton Benjamin comes out and says that on No Mercy it was a fluke. He challenges Punk for a rematch tonight, Punk accepts.
Big Daddy V defeats Sharkboy
- Punk runs to Samoa Joe backstage. They talk about how they go way back and
have had amazing matches
CM Punk defeats Shelton Benjamin to retain the ECW Title. After the match Rhino comes out and he Gores Punk, then poses with the ECW Title.
Friday 10th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Mark Henry defeats Sharkboy
Kane defeats The Great Khali. Lights go out and then turn red. Abyss comes down to ringside and stares with Kane.
MCMG defeat Deuce and Domino
Winner gets a WHC match next week Fatal Four Way
Edge defeats Batista, Big Show and Finlay
Monday 13th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Vince comes out and cuts a promo. He says that to win this battle against TNA, WWE has to be united. He says that from now on the Brand Extension does no longer exist. He also says that during the course of the next weeks the WWE titles will be unified, culminating at InVasion, the PPV that will substitute Cyber Sunday, with a Triple Threat between the WWE Champion, the World Heavyweight Champion and the ECW Champion. And this will start this week as the US title and the IC Title get unified. He also says that at InVasion a 20 man 10 vs 10 Battle Royal will be held.
The Hardyz defeat LAX
Scott Steiner defeats Mr. Kennedy. He then cuts a promo of how he is so dominating.
IC Champion Chris Jericho defeats US Champ MVP to unify the belts.
Amazing Kong defeats Ashley
- HBK gets interviewed. He makes an open challenge for any TNA wrestler at SD.
Triple H and John Cena defeat Kurt Angle and Booker T as Cena makes Booker tap out to the STFU. Triple H then challengers Booker T for a match at InVasion (match is later accepted on WWE.com)
Tuesday 14th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- Scott Steiner comes out and says he dominated on Raw last night, and will do the same at ECW.
Scott Steiner defeats Stevie Richards
Umaga defeats VKM
AJ Styles defeats Cody Rhodes
- Randy Orton meets AJ Styles backstage. Orton says that for a TNA guy, AJ can
Take good care of business.
Abyss defeats Hardcore Holly. Fire came out from turnbuckles in a Kane mind game.
Rhino defeats CM Punk thanks to Samoa Joe interfering.
Friday 17th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Randy Orton defeats Lance Hoyt.
- AJ Styles and Orton backstage. Styles says Randy is not that bad for a WWE guy.
- Scott Steiner promo. He says Smackdown will be another step in his domination path.
Scott Steiner defeats The Miz. Batista comes out afterwards and says SD is his land, and it’s where he is dominant. Scott Steiner says he has only been dominant with WWE losers, not with TNA talent.
World Tag Team Champions The Hardyz defeat WWE Tag Champions Jesse & Festus to unify the belts.
IC/US Unified Champion Chris Jericho defeats MVP in a US Title rematch. He then cuts a promo about a big announcement concerning his MITB at Raw.
- Edge runs into Christian, making his WWE “debut/returnâ€. Christian says he doesn’t care about the whole WWE/TNA stuff, that Edge and him are forever, and they reek awesomeness.
HBK defeats Jay Lethal.
The Undertaker defeats Edge to retain the WHC. Christian then comes out and he and Edge both beat down Taker.
Monday 20th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
Batista defeats Brother Ray and Brother D-Von. Scott Steiner was in commentary.
- AJ Styles mentions Randy Orton that he should jump to the TNA bunch, the rising ship, and not in WWE, the sinking one. Randy thinks he will think about it.
Winner faces The Hardys for the World Tag Team Unified Belts at InVasion
Londrick vs Deuce and Domino vs Jesse and Festus vs Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch goes to a No Contest after MCMG interfere.
- JBL runs into Kurt Angle backstage. He says he will show him later tonight why you don’t mess with the WWE. Angle accepts the challenge
AJ Styles defeats Carlito. After the match Randy Orton comes out and he RKOs AJ Styles, giving him a negative answer about joining TNA.
HBK defeat Tomko by DQ when James Storm comes out. Storm says he is the real deal and will prove it to him at InVasion.
Mickie James defeat ODB
- HHH/Booker T have their contract signing. They argue and it ends with Triple H hitting the pedigree on Booker T.
Kurt Angle defeat JBL. After the match, Chris Jericho comes out and says that he came back to save the WWE. And he will finally do it, as he saves WWE from Kurt Angle, as he will cash in Money in the Bank at InVasion for the TNA World Title.
Tuesday 21st, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi.
Samoa Joe defeats Chavo Guerrero
Batista defeats Kaz. Scott Steiner then says to Batista to cut the crap, that he is just fooling around, and that at InVasion he will meet truly what TNA has to offer, as he goes on one with him. Batista accepts. Scott seems to be leaving but then cheap shots him.
- John Cena meets CM Punk backstage. He says that even if he retains tonight against Rhino, he’s losing at Sunday. Punk says that Cena not only has to go through him, but over Undertaker, but in the end, it would be him, CM Punk, to leave Undisputed Champion.
Black Reign defeats John Morrison
- The Hardyz come out, they say that they don’t have challengers, but the team that impress them is MCMG, the TNA Tag Team Champions. They challenge them with their titles on the line at InVasion.
Kane and Abyss get into a huge brawl. Abyss was in the ring and called out Kane, with Kane then answered.
CM Punk defeats Rhino to retain the ECW Title.
Friday 24th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown.
John Cena defeats CM Punk
- Kurt Angle and says he is not only causing chaos on Raw, as he is also on Smackdown doing it. He then rants on Chris Jericho. Kurt then goes to the outside and trying not be two obvious, he comes close to the Coach, then grabs him and starts attacking him, finally locking an Angle Lock. EMT’s rush to help The Coachman. Angle says he has a qualified substitute, and he brings out Jim Cornette.
Big Daddy V and Mark Henry destroy Super Eric
AJ Styles defeats Randy Orton with a rollup.
- Scott Steiner until he gets mulled by Batista, they brawl until security separates them.
- Edge and Christian meet backstage. Christian says he has gotten them opponents for InVasion for their reunion match. Edge wishes Christian good luck.
Big Show and Umaga defeat LAX
- MCMG backstage in a taped promo. They accept Hardyz challenge with the World Tag Team titles on the line.
Undertaker defeats Christian. Edge tries to interfere but gets stopped by Cena and Punk. Show ends with Taker and Punk in a huge staredown.
Sunday 26th, October 2008: InVasion PPV
World Tag Team Title Match
TNA Tag Team Champions MCMG defeat The Hardyz to win the belts
Batista defeats Scott Steiner
HBK defeats James Storm. Storm then went for a beatdown after the match had ended but Chris Harris made his WWE debut saving HBK.
Booker T defeats Triple H. The referee got knocked out and Booker planted HHH with a chair, then covering him.
The Dudleys defeat Edge and Christian. Christian turned on Edge, planting him with the Unprettier. The Dudleyz then covered him.
- Kurt Angle says that for the Battle Royal, he is bringing the ultimate talent from
TNA, with some even making their WWE debut.
20 Man Team Battle Royal
AJ Styles, Tomko, Rhino, Kevin Nash, Robert Roode, Jay Lethal, Samoa Joe, Homicide, Hernandez, Abyss defeats Randy Orton, Big Show, Umaga, MVP, Mr. Kennedy, Kane, Finlay, JBL, Carlito, Kofi Kingston, when Big Show turned in WWE and he eliminated Randy Orton, the last man left along with him. AJ Styles and Big Show survived for TNA.
Kurt Angle defeats Y2J after several distractions from TNA wrestlers
WWE Champion John Cena defeats ECW Champion CM Punk and WHC The Undertaker to become the Undisputed Champion.
Monday 27th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Kurt Angle promo. He comes out and says last night TNA proved why they are better than WWE. Not only he defeated Y2J and remained TNA World Champion, but most of his TNA wrestlers defeated his WWE opponents at InVasion. Chris Jericho comes out. He says last night he was cheated, and wants a rematch tonight. Angle says he might consider giving another title match if he manages to retain his IC title against one of his wrestler. Jericho says he will take any TNA loser. Angle presents Christian Cage as his opponent.
Mr. Kennedy defeats Robert Roode
Big Show defeats Finlay
Booker T defeats HBK by DQ, as Triple H comes out and attacks Booker with the sledgehammer.
Christian Cage defeats Chris Jericho to win the IC Title. Edge tried to attack Christian Cage but Y2J sent him to the back refusing his help.
- Vince Mcmahon comes out and says he is sick of it. He says he owns all and TNA wrestlers are his employees, and he is firing them all. Kurt appears on the Tron and invites him to do it, so that he gets another lawsuit riot on his hands.
John Cena retains the Undisputed Title against The Undertaker
Tuesday 28th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- CM Punk comes out and cuts a promo. He says that tonight he has a chance to become Undisputed Champion. Samoa Joe then comes out and says there is no chance you win that belt, in fact there is no chance he wins anything. Samoa Joe leaves.
Scott Steiner and Abyss defeat Kane and Batista
Randy Orton defeats AJ Styles
Umaga defeats Rock N’ Rave Infection
- James Storm and Chris Harris run into each other backstage. In an awkward moment, with tension in the air, Storm says is good to see Harris again
John Cena defeats CM Punk to retain the Undisputed Title. Samoa Joe comes out to the stage and he mocks Punk.
Friday 31st, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Randy Orton defeats AJ Styles by DQ as Big Show comes out and attacks him.
MVP defeats Curryman
- Jay Lethal meets Vince Mcmahon backstage. Vince says his X-division title is like the Cruiserweight Title, and therefore needs to be unified. On Raw he will face the last Cruiserweight Champion.
Edge defeats Christian by count-out as Christian just walks out of the match
Batista and Kane defeat Abyss and Scott Steiner. Lights go out and Taker appears on ring, making everybody flee.
Monday 3rd, November 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Vince comes out. He says that Kurt Angle was right last week. He just can’t fire everybody and face all the lawsuits. But, he is Mr. Mcmahon, the boss, and he still calls the shots. He says that from now on, every WWE vs TNA match will be Job on the Line match, and the loser will get fire, except if you are a champion
X-Division Champion Jay Lethal defeats Last Cruiserweight Champion Hornswoggle to unify the belts. Hornswoggle loses his job.
- HHH and HBK cut a promo backstage as DX. They say that some time ago, there was team calling them out. Well, tonight, DX will face them with their jobs on the line.
DX defeats VKM making Kip James and BG James lose their jobs. Triple after the match grabs a mic and tells Booker that he is next.
Tuesday 4th, November 2008:
Big Show defeats Tommy Dreamer making Dreamer lose his job.
- The Hardyz come out. They say it’s only fitting for Team Xtreme to make this announcement on ECW. They say they have a rematch clause and that they are invoking it at Survivor Series at against the MCMG.
CM Punk defeats Elijah Burke. Samoa Joe comes out and he beats down CM Punk
Friday 7th, November 2008:
- Scott Steiner meets Batista backstage. Steiner says Batista is lucky he is not facing him tonight, because if it were, Batista would lose his job. Batista then says to watch his match carefully, because one of his “friends†would indeed lose his job.
Umaga defeats RelliK. RelliK loses his job.
Batista defeats Petey Williams. Williams loses his job.
- MCMG come out. They accept the challenge of The Hardyz.
Big Show defeats Super Crazy and Jim Duggan making them lose their job.
- Christian is leaving the arena. Edge catches him and stops him. Edge challenges him for a match at Survivor Series. Christian is hesitant, Edge says what is to afraid, after all your job won’t be on the line because you are a champion. Christian accepts.
Chris Harris defeats MVP by DQ when James Storm attacked him.
Abyss defeats Kane. Kane loses his job. Lights go out and Taker appears in the ring. He grabs Kane, lights go out again and neither Taker or Kane are in the ring.
Monday 10th, November 2008: Monday Night Raw
Big Show defeats Finlay making him lose his job.
- Kurt Angle comes out and says it is funny how TNA has cleaned the WWE roster. But it is time for the ultimate challenge. He calls Vince out. Vince comes out. Kurt says that for Survivor Series, it will be 5 of his TNA wrestlers, against 5 of his WWE losers, and that 5 losers will get fired. Vince accepts. He then says that speaking of that, he notices that Kurt is still World Champion, and it so happens that WWE has also a World Champion. Kurt says John Cena is no World Champion. Vince says Kurt has talked a lot, but he has to back it up, he challenges Kurt to face John Cena, with not only their jobs, but both titles on the line at Survivor Series. Kurt accepts.
MCMG defeat The Dudleyz
Batista defeats Jimmy Rave making him lose his job. Batista is then announced as one of the members of Team WWE.
- Triple H enters Cena’s locker room. He says he better be ready for Survivor Series, but quite frankly he doesn’t trust him. HHH says Cena has to prove that he is worthy of that challenge. Cena says he is on for tonight.
JBL defeats Super Eric, making him lose his job. JBL is announced as one of the members of Team WWE.
- Booker T is interviewed backstage. He accepts HHH challenge, saying he has been waiting almost all his career to end HHH’s.
Gail Kim defeats Maryse making here lose his job. Knockouts where on Kim corner and Divas where on Maryse’s.
John Cena defeats Triple H. Kurt and Booker T try to enter the ring and attack them but HHH and Cena see them before they do. They remain in a staredown.
WWE.com announces Chris Harris vs James Storm at Survivor Series
Tuesday 11th, November 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi.
Big Show cuts a promo saying he will be in TNA’s team at Survivor Series. He then defeats Finlay making him lose his job.
- MVP and Mr. Kennedy meet backstage. They say they are the future of the company. They will tag on SD to make two TNA wrestlers lose their jobs
Randy Orton defeats Elix Skipper. Skipper loses his job. Randy is announced as a member of Team WWE.
The Hardyz defeat Miz & Morrison
TNA Exhibition Match
Nash is announced as a member of Team TNA. Kevin Nash vs Samoa Joe goes to a No Contest when CM Punk interferes and attacks Joe.
Friday 14th, November 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
- Cutting Edge. Edge invites Christian Cage. They talk about their past and how the first time they separated, Edge kicked Christian ass. Segment appears to be over but Christian cheap shots Edge.
MVP and Mr. Kennedy defeat Lance Hoyt and Black Reign making them lose their job.
Scott Steiner defeats Charlie Hass. Hass loses his job. Steiner is announced as a member of Team TNA.
- Samoa Joe comes out and he says CM Punk has always been jealous of him, and on Tuesday it was more than clear. He says that on Sunday he will end Punk’s suffering, as he will lose his job and will not have to worry about wrestling anymore.
- Vince Mcmahon meets Jay Lethal backstage. He asks him if he is still a part of TNA. Lethal says he is. Vince tells him not to be dumb, he is already a WWE Champion, and when TNA disappears from the WWE landscape, he doesn’t want to be in the boss’s bad side.
Abyss defeats Snitksy. Snitksy loses his job. Gong plays as lights go out. Taker says Abyss played with fire, he messed with his brother, and it’s time he gets burned. “You…me…Survivor Series!â€
WWE.com announces Chris Jericho as a member of Team WWE.
Monday 17th, November 2008: Monday Night Raw:
The Hardys defeat The Dudleyz after a failed run in by MCMG. The Dudleyz lose their jobs.
- Jay Lethal accepts Vince’s offer. He is desserts from TNA.
- JBL meets Robert Roode backstage. He says that Lethal is a smart man. He knows Robert is one as well, and that deep inside he knows WWE is the way to know. JBL leaves leaving Roode thinking it.
AJ Styles and Tomko defeat Drew McIntyre and Dave Taylor. McIntyre and Taylor lose their jobs. Styles and Tomko are announced as members of Team TNA.
- HHH is walking backstage, when out of a sudden Team TNA and Booker T assault him. HHH is left knocked out.
Chris Harris vs Robert Roode never happens as Roode comes out and says he is from WWE now, and will not fight him. James Storm comes out and from behind attack both of them.
- Vince books a WWE Exhibition Match, claiming that if TNA can do it, damn sure they can.
WWE Exhibition Match
HBK defeats Chris Jericho. HBK is announced as a member of Team WWE
- Cena and Kurt sign their contract for their match at Survivor Series, they talk about their respective title belts and what it means for them. Cena is leaving when from behind Kurt Angle grabs him and locks him in the Ankle Lock. Cena taps out.
Tuesday 18th, November 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
Matt Hardy defeats Alex Shelley. Because Shelley is Tag Team Champion, he maintains his job. Hardyz and MCMG brawl afterwards.
- CM Punk accepts Samoa Joe’s challenge for Survivor Series.
Divas Team’s Match
Mickie James, Melina, Beth Pheonix, Victoria and Candice Michelle defeat Gail Kim, ODB, Velvet Sky, Salinas, Roxxy Laveoux and Traci Brooks. TNA knockouts in the match lose their jobs.
- Christian Cage’s Peepshow is interrupted by Edge, that spears him from behind.
WWE.com announces Kurt Angle vs Jay Lethal as a punishment for Lethal because of him deserting to WWE.
Friday 21st, November 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
- Roode wishes Lethal good luck against Angle later on tonight.
Undertaker defeats Rhino. Rhino loses his job. Taker taunts to Abyss that had come out to the stage.
- Booker T is walking backstage along with Team TNA. HHH and Team WWE attack them. Team WWE and Team TNA brawl, and HHH brawls with Booker T.
Kurt Angle defeats Jay Lethal. Because Jay is a champion he doesn’t lose his job. Angle goes for post match beat down, but John Cena comes out and makes the save. He locks in the STFU on Kurt Angle. EMTs and officials have to come out to force John Cena to release the hold.
Sunday 23rd, November 2008: Survivor Series PPV
The Hardys defeat World Tag Team Champions and TNA Tag Team Champions MCMG to win the World tag Team Champions. Because the MCMG are champs, they don’t lose their jobs.
CM Punk and Samoa Joe ends in a tie thanks to a double count-out.
The Undertaker defeats Abyss. Abyss loses his job.
Triple H defeats Booker T, making Booker T lose his job.
Edge defeats Christian. Christian is a champion, so he doesn’t lose his job.
James Storm defeats Chris Harris. Harris loses his job.
Team WWE (Orton, Batista, HBK, Y2J and JBL) defeat Team TNA (AJ, Tomko, Steiner, Nash, Big Show). Team TNA loses their jobs.
WWE Undisputed Champion John Cena defeats TNA Heavyweight Champion Kurt Angle to win the TNA title. Angle loses his job.
WOW, that is a lot. Now onto MS
TNA Invasion
Prelude:
At WM 24 Vince Mcmahon announces that he has purchased TNA from Panda Energy. Vince declines to comment on the aquisition until the following night on Raw as WM is about WWE stars.
Important Match info:
Undertaker d. Edge via Tombstone to win World Heavyweight title
HHH d. Randy Orton and John Cena to win WWE title after HHH nails Orton with a pedigree and makes the pinfall.
Week 1 (Raw):
The show opens with the usual pyro and "No Chance in Hell" plays over the PA as Vince makes his way to the ring.
Vince says that he has made history again by buying out his competition. Except this time he didn't do it because they were going out of business, he did it because he developed a taste for crushing dreams. Vince states that all TNA wrestlers are fired and will not be appearing on Raw. After all he has more talent than he needs, and he doesn't need a group of second rate wrestlers cluttering up his well oiled machine.
Vince gets pensive for a moment and says that well, that' snot true. There is one man whom he has rehired. "Gold Medal" plays over the PA and Kurt Angle makes his way to the ring to deafening cheers from the crowd.
Vince hands Kurt a mic, and Kurt says "Thank you Vince. I just want to say I'm sorry. I never should've left you two years ago. You were right. You did know what was best for me, and I promise you that you'll get a wrestling machine at 100% starting tonight." Kurt hugs Vince and then they shake hands. Vince says that Kurt was always welcome to return and he didn't know why Angle ever left in the first place. Vince states that there will be a clean slate starting now and all past transgressions will be forgotten.
Angle again thanks Vince and says that he is an Olympic gold medalist, and a champion, and he would like a shot at HHH for the WWE title at Backlash.
Vince replies by telling Angle that he'd love to give him that, because after all, Angle's always been like a son to him, but John Cena has a rematch at Backlash with HHH as he was not pinned in the triple threat. Vince instead tells Angle that he will wrestle Randy Orton in a Number 1 Contender match at Backlash and the winner will face HHH at The Great American Bash. Angle accepts the match, and Vince says that Angle will have a tune up match tonight against Cody Rhodes.
Kurt Angle vs Cody Rhodes
The match takes place at the top of the 10 o'clock hour and features Angle winning handily via the ankle lock.
Later Kurt is shown celebrating backstage in his locker room, Vince joins him and tells him to go home and enjoy his victory.
After a commercial break Kurt is shown leaving the arena and heading to his car when he is jumped by Christian Cage, AJ Styles, Tomko, Christopher Daniels and Eric Young, who lay a beat down on Kurt and leave him laying.
Week 2 (Raw):
The show once again opens with Vince coming to the ring, his usual swagger absent and replaced with a furious determination. Vince addresses the TNA employees who jumped Angle last week by saying that he could call the police and have them arrested since they are not WWE employees, but instead decides to offer them the opportunity to settle this like men in the ring. Vince states that he will give the TNA wrestlers a 10 man tag team match at Backlash, and if they win he will grant the five of them contracts. He says that he wants a response by next week and offers them the opportunity to reply to him face to face next week on Raw.
Week 3 (Raw):
At the top of the 10 o'clock hour Vince swaggers out to the ring, and invites the TNA wrestlers to join him and give him their response.
Cage, Styles, Tomko, Daniels, and Young make their way to the ring without entrance music, and Cage is handed a mic by Vince to respond for the TNA team.
Cage states that the terms are not acceptable to them as even if they get jobs there will still be an entire company of guys out of work.
Vince tells them to take it or leave it. Cage tells him to stick his offer, and that they are going to make Vince's life hell.
Cage and crew leave the ring and the arena in short order. While Vince fumes over being turned down.
Week 4: (Smackdown)
Cage and crew are shown at ringside having purchased front row seats.
Undertaker vs. John Morrison (Non-title match)
Undertaker controls this match with Morrison getting in spurts of offense when Eric Young throws a full cup of soda at Undertaker's head while his back is turned. Undertaker turns to face the five TNA wrestlers and argues with them from the ring daring them to come in. Morrison rolls up Undertaker from behind and scores a shock pinfall with his feet on the ropes.
Backlash:
Vince states in a backstage vignette that he will again meet with the TNA wrestlers on Raw and will hear what their requests are for a match, as at this point he just wants their blood.
Important match info:
Undertaker d. Edge to retain the WHC.
Kurt Angle d. Randy Orton with the Angle Slam to become the number one contender.
HHH d. John Cena to retain the WWE title.
Week 5 (Raw):
The show opens with Vince calling the TNA crew to the ring. Cage, Styles, Tomko, Daniels, and Young again make their way into the ring. Vince hands Cage the mic and tells him to make his pitch.
Cage says that they will meet 5 of Vince's best in the ring under the following circumstances.
If Team TNA wins:
- All the TNA wrestlers that were under contract before the buy out will again have contracts to wrestle.
- ECW will be renamed TNA Impact and they will wrestle on that show.
Cage also states that since Vince likes to buy out companies and crush dreams he wants to resurrect an old match from WCW. The TNA Team will meet Team WWE in a 5 on 5 War Games match at One Night Stand. These are the terms that they will agree to, and only these terms.
Vince looks pensive for a moment and tells them that they are on. The only stipulation that he will add is that if Team TNA loses they will leave and never darken his doorstep again. Cage agrees with this and the match is on. Vince announces that he will reveal his team next week on Raw. He invites them all to be here again next week for the announcement.
Week 6 (Raw):
The TNA wrestlers are shown in the back in their own locker room awaiting the announcement of the team.
Vince makes his way to the ring, and announces that his team will be Kurt Angle, HHH, the Undertaker, Batista, and JBL. Kurt Angle gets distrustful stares from all members of his team as the announcement is made.
Vince also states that the contract signing will be next week live on Raw.
Later JBL asks Vince why he would agree to those stipulations stated last week. Vince says that its all about money. At One Night Stand his team will crush team TNA, and each of Team WWE and himself will make a nice pay day and TNA will be gone forever. JBL loving money, loves the idea and calls Vince a genius.
Week 7 (Raw):
The show opens with Team WWE running interference between Team TNA preventing them from aiding Eric Young who sustains a vicious beatdown from the Undertaker leaving him bloody and broken in the parking lot.
Later Young is shown being loaded in an ambulance having suffered sever head truama from taking several tombstone piledrivers on the asphalt.
In what is effectively the main event Team WWE with Vince makes their way to the ring, which is decked out for the contract signing. Team TNA follows less Eric Young.
Vince crows about them being in teh big leagues and not trifiling with Vince McMahon.
Styles snatches a mic and says it doesn't matter if its 4 on 5 or 5 on 5 they will beat them. Vince patronizingly pats Styles on the head and tells him to just keep on beileving that while team WWE guffaws behind him.
Vince signs the contract on behalf of team WWE, and hands the contract to Cage. Cage hesitates and eventually signs the contract.
Immediately after the contract is signed team WWE jumps team TNA and begins beating on them weakening them up for One Night Stand. The numbers advantage proves to be too much and team TNA is suffering a severe beating when a husky man in a hoodie jumps the guard rail and starts laying into team WWE with lefts and rights. He throws Angle into the corner as teh momentum shifts, he takes off his hoodie to reveal himself as Samoa Joe. Joe hits Angle with a musclebuster and throws him out of the ring as team TNA gets to their feet and embrace Joe.
One Night Stand:
War Games Match:
Christian Cage, AJ Styles, Tomko, Christopher Daniels, and Samoa Joe vs. HHH, Kurt Angle, the Undertaker, Batista, and JBL.
The match is violent and bloody with team WWE gaining the one man advantage throughout the entire match.
The finish comes when Christian Cage is waiting for Kurt Angle to get up off the mat so that he might hit the unprettier. In a moment of prescience Cage looks behind him and sees HHH swinging a chair at his head. Cage ducks and HHH plasters Angle in the face knocking him out cold. Samoa Joe tackles HHH and Cage gets on top of Angle and began laying stiff punches to his head forcing the referee to call the match as Angle had been knocked totall unconscious.
Team TNA celebrates in the ring as Vince looks on in complete and utter shock and what has transpired.
Onto the judges decisions
The Leviathan
Monkeystyles' Work
You've really focused on the fued between Vince Mcmahon and the TNA which lead by Christian Cage. I think Cage makes a great leader of a faction like that, he managed to give some heat with the WWE Chairman as they go on the rivalry. The only thing I can't imagine is about Angle, joining back to WWE, I think he won't do that after the issues between him and WWE. The interference part of Team TNA during Taker's match really adds some heat to it that makes the fued more interesting. Having a War Games type of match is really a great ending of the storyline. Overall your work is really fascinating, great job.
CMS' Work
Your storyline is also quite interesting as TNA invades every superstars of WWE and show how great they are compared to WWE. The matches were the loser will lose his job is quite okay to say how he will be release from the company in kayfabe terms. There are some questions I wanna ask though, like the Unifications between the World and WWE Tag and the U.S. and the Intercontinental titles. Why did you do that? I think TNA don't involve in those things. Some storylines are unecessary tbh, like the Steiner/Batista one. You're storyline is quite similar from the WCW/WWF invasion to me.
Overall: Okay! As what I said, both storylines are great but my vote will go to Monkeystyles' work. I am sorry CMS but MS showed the focal point and that's the TNA and WWE. You've also managed to show it but there are some unecessary storylines to me that don't made a point in the TNA/WWE Rivalry. So my vote will be MS' one.
Rating:
Monkeystyles - 8/10
CMS - 7/10
Soulpower
MS scores a 9/10. The fact that it was a bit short prevented me from giving it a perfect score. I loved the fact that you brought back Wargames, for one because I'm a big fan of the match, and two, its a great way to settle a feud between the two companies. I liked that Joe's debut was held back and he was made to look like a big deal by helping team TNA and taking out Kurt Angle.
I also would have liked to see the mistrust between the WWE stars and Angle to have been played up a bit more.
Still, it was a great read with a surprise finish and that always helps.
As for CMS' BTB. It gets an 8/10. I hated the fact that he kept the TNA titles because we ended up with a shitload of titles and there's no way that all of them could be relevant. I loved the fact that you decided to book some matches between WWE and TNA talent because it gives us fresh-matchups. I also didn't like that TNA lost all the big matches at Survivor Series. It was bad enough that Angle lost to Cena, but add in team TNA losing to team WWE and we end up with a retread of the WCW Invasion Angle.
Basically, WWE was made to look all mighty while TNA was made to look like a lesser fed.
Still, even with its flaws it was a good BTB.
Kaedon
Well it all seems kind of moot now but here we go.
MS: Yours was a little on the thin side, content wise. Like not because it was short, but because you didn’t take the Invasion anywhere but Raw. I mean you have 3 shows to work with. Also, you brought back Christopher Daniel when, I believe he isn’t a member of TNA anymore. Finally, the alignment of each side was unclear, to say the least. Who were the faces and who were the heels? Other than that, I loved yours. I pray to God we get to see a War Games match at least one more time. The stipulations of the match are great, especially renaming ECW “TNA Impactâ€. Just great, great shit. 7.5/10
CMS: Yours was way too long. Way, way, wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too long. The reason I put word limits on I because eventually it gets boring to read. Add to that, your booking was very spotty. I mean you included semi in depth stuff about guys like Jay Lethal and Robert Roode and they didn’t have any affect on the final outcome at the SS. Also, a SP said you made the WWE come off looking recockulously strong. Finally, Kurt lost to Cena, he didn’t have the title, he should have been fired. On the plus side, I like how you did get something on everyone. It didn’t have to be a much as you did, just a line or 2, but it was still good. I like how you didn’t go right for the multiman tag because that’s a bit too predictable. Also, some of the matches you came up with, fit PEFECTLY, like Steiner vs. Batista. Good stuff man. 7/10
And with that Monkeystyle is the new NSZ BTB Champion! That was a BARN BURNER! And since Switchy was a no show, he gets first dibs at the next match!
Well that it for the NSZ this week. Thank for taking 5 years out of your life to read it. Next week, its going to be a Wrestlemania edition of FACT or FICTION! See ya next week!
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLADIES AND GENTLEMAN, BOYS AND GIRLS AND GAMBLING DEGENEATES, this is yo boyeeeeeee Stu Finer here to make you the richest man, woman, or quadraped on your block! Coming up we have the biggest PPV that we see all year, WRESTLEMANIA! And it is the best time to reel you man in and take him for all he’s worth. Sure none of these matches are actually on the board in Vegas, but that’s because THEY ARE AFRAID TO LOSE TO THE FINE(R)ST MAN IN THE GAME. Forget football, forget baseball, and lets face it, who cares about basketball. Who would pay to watch a bunch of convicts smile and wave to the crowd besides TNA fans, Chicago Bear fans, and Cincinnati Bengals fans!? This is wrestling, this is the sport of kings, and next Sunday, at Wrestlemania, it is going to be YOUR LUCKY DAY! I know, I know, I know what you are gonna say, “Stu, you were only 3-2 at the Royal Rumble, I lost a lot of money on that big 30 man match.†Yeah yeah yeah, I know, but heres whatcha gotta know. Gambling is a long term investment, I have never said it was anything but that. Sometimes you have to Muhammed Ali your man and then STRIKE HIM when he’s at his weakest. Now that I’ve got your confidence up, ARE YOU READY FOR A SHORT TERM INVESTMENT THAT WILL MAKE YOU RICHER THAN THAT TRANSVESTITE AND HIS DRUG ADDICTED FAMILY ON FX!? Time for the picks…
24 Man Interbrand Battle Royal for a Shot at the ECW Title/ECW Title Match
Now, I know I didn’t do so well last time when picking a battle royal winner, but I think the WWE sabotaged me. They saw how much action I was getting, and how much money their secret bookies would be losing, and they decided to shoot Cena full of juice, pain killers, OJ, and who knows what else, just to get him back at the Rumble just to screw yo boyyeee over. But this time, ah ha ha, there will be no surprises. I know youre saying “How can you say that? All of the participants haven’t been announced.†But the only man who has a chance in hell of coming back and winning this is Matt Hardy and he is busy going through the rubble of brother Jeff’s house, helping him look for his stash of meth. So forget him. We have a lot of heavy hitters in this one. The Great Khali (which in Punjabi translates into “The Great Company Lies For Meâ€), Mark Henry, Kane, and Big Daddy V, the man who’s love of nacho’s has spread back to his home town of Fat Assia. There are also some smaller guys who are sure to be in it, guys like Charlie Haas, Rory McCallister, Jamie Noble, Chuck Palumbo, Cody Rhodes, Hardcore Holly, and WWE’s brightest new star, Kofi Kingston. So with all of this firepower in the match, who is going to win? The so called “smart money†is on one of the smaller guys because statistically, the big man has little success in past battle royals. But I am going to say forget all that NONSENSE, we are going to have a big man win it! We have the man who has been underused since his career started in the WWE. He is a man who was brought in simply to put over someone else, yet got over himself and that man is Kane. Yeah, Stu hears you, yeah Stu knows you think “Kane never wins†which is EXACTLY why the time is now to sink your money into the big red machine. Here is something I bet you didn’t know, not only is Kane batting a thousand against Chavo ALL TIME in their careers, look at the names “Chavo Guerrero†and the “Big Red Machineâ€. That’s 13 letters in Chavo’s name and 13 letters in Kane’s nickname. Big men who face little men at a PPV immediately following a battle royal, AND who’s name would come before his opponents alphabetically, is an astounding 157-0 all time PPV.
Winner of both matches: Kane
7 Man Money In The Bank Ladder Match
This was originally supposed to be an 8 man match. But thanks to the drug taking, house burning, no selling machine known as Jeff Hardy, it has become a 7 man match. It sucks for the fans, but is great for YOU the degenerate gambler. It makes the odds better for your pick, really my pick, and boy do I have a pick for you. This is my *****, silver bullet pick of the month. IF YOU DO NOT get on this pick, and I mean RIDE IT like Lita rides wrestlers who are married, YOU ARE GOING TO LOOK LIKE A CHUMP STAIN! Get on this pick, get out of that Prius, and get in the fast lane with Mister Ken Kennedy! Forget about Carlito, he’s still wiping the bird shit out his hair. MVP? He’s going to be too busy posing to the crowd to get anything done. Shelton Benjamin? Don’t make me laugh! The only GOLD he is ever going to see is in his HAIR. John Morrison? By the time his slow motion entrance is done, THE MATCH WILL BE OVER! KYJ? Ryan Seacrest came up with the idea 4 years ago. He didn’t win then, and he is not going to win now. That brings us to the sXe superstar, CM Punk. What chance does a man who cant do a shot of Vodka before a match have? No, this years pick is Mr. Kennedy. That’s right, the cheesehead is going to win it again. I know, I know, I know Kennedy won it last year and I know he blew it but this year, this is the year of Kennedy because he has more than just skill, luck, or providence on his side, he has….FAVRE. That’s right, I said it, Brett Favre! No, he wont be at ringside but check this out…when did Brett Favre make his Green Bay Packer debut? 1992 and that year, who won the first WWF Ladder Match? Bret “The Hitman†Hart. Guys in ladder matches in years where Brett Favre makes a historic move in football, AND who currently reside in the Midwestern part of North America, are a historic 73-9 all time! JUMP ON KEN, JUMP ON KENNEDY, JUMP ON KEN KENNEDY!
Winner: Ken Kennedy
Batista vs. Umaga, Smackdown vs. Raw
You know, good ol JR has a name for these kind of matches. He calls them “bowling shoe uglyâ€. I don’t think it is going to be anywhere near as bad as say Khali vs. Snitsky would be, but make no mistake about it, this is going to be a straight up brawl with wo powerhouses going at it. These are usually the hardest matches to predict since both guys are so even. It’s like the All NFC vs. the All AFC in Madden, it’s a mirror match. But have no fear, Stu Finer is here! I have the best research associates that an empty promise of advancement in a Fortune 1,000,000 company can offer. They work round the clock giving me the inside edge so I can give it to you. And here it is….Batista. Batista, Batista, Batista. SD is 61-6 in interpromotional battles all time and wins 99% of the matches when they are at Wrestlemania. Sell your blood, sell your house, sell your car, hell, sell your mother into something she probably doesn’t want to do and tell her “Ma, I’ll BUY YOU a therapist after I cash in on Batista over Umaga!â€
Winner: Batista
Finlay vs. JBL in a Belfast Brawl
This is going to be another ugly match, but not for the reasons stated before. These guys just plain don’t like each other. It’s like the Raiders playing anyone in the 80s, it got dirty and it got personal and that is what is going to happen here. Look for cheap shots, golf clubs, hell even a kitchen sink to get tossed around in this one. Now JBL thinks he is a big man on Wallstreet, but I will tell you this, STU FINER MAKES MORE MONEY ON ONE PICK THAN JBL MAKES IN A MONTH! That’s right! If I woke up one day with JBLs money, I would think about killing myself. Then, Id listen to Stu Finer, and double, triple, and quadruple my income, ALL IN ONE NIGHT! Now onto the pick. JBL is facing the Irishman Finlay. We are just coming off of what holiday? St. Patricks Day! Look for Finlay to be Guinness fueled and look for him to get the straight up win OVER JBL.
Winner: Finlay
The Big Show vs. Floyd “Money†Mayweather
This is the battle of a Wrestlemania Virgin vs. a Wrestlemania Whore. That’s right, Big Show is a WHORE when it comes to Mania. The question isn’t who has Big Show BEATEN at Wrestlemania, its “Who has he LOST to at Wrestlemaniaâ€. Sumo wrestlers, rappers, red fried freaks, hardcore jabroni’s, a cut and runner, a fat author, and a man who is one more title reign away from calling himself JESUS CHRIST is the short list of losses on Shows record. But oh man, this year its different. This year he has Money Mayweather. A guy half his size, half his weight, and a man who doesn’t know a wrestling ring from an onion ring. Floyd Maywether is dumber than Mike Tysons brain dead lovechild with the daughter of Timmy from South Park. So not only is he undersized, not only is he stupid, he’s arrogant. Ask the New England Patriots if being cocky is the best thing to do. And by the way, guess who was the first man to predict the Giants upsetting the Pats? That’s right, STU F*CKING FINER! Bottom line is, I don’t like Mayweather, he’s small, he’s dumb, he’s cocky, and he’s RIPE for the picking. JUMP ON THE BIG SHOW AT WRRRRRRRESTLEMANIA!
Winner: The Big Show
Playboy Tag Team Match
Let’s face it, the only person who really cares about this match is the guy who gets to be in there in all the hot diva action, Snoop Dogg. So I’m not even going to predict a winner because IF YOU ARE BETTING ON WOMENS WRESTLING, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
Edge vs. The Undertaker for the World Heavyweight Title
Oh boy is this the motherload. Streak vs. Title. Student vs. Teacher. Canadian vs. The Dead. This match could make a good Mania great, and a great Mania HISTORIC. The WWE has been shitting all over the build up to this match but let it be known that it doesn’t matter because when it comes down to go time, these guys will produce. JUST LIKE your boyee Stu Finer. Now the so called easy money is on Undertaker because he has the streak behind him. He has decades of experience and literally thousands more matches than his opponent. Knowing all of that, I am going with EDGE. That’s right, EDGE has the EDGE, and here is the EDGE that EDGE has. The Rated R Superstar is facing The Deadman for the first time at a WM this year. Does anyone know the corpse to Canadian ratio at the granddaddy of them all!? PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN only Stu Finer knows because I have a crack research team. Canadian wrestlers taking on corpses at Wrestlemania, are an amazing 296-1 all time PPV. That’s right, take this info but shhhhhhh shhhhhhhh shhhhhhh keep it to yourself. But remember that stat, when you plop down 10gs on Edge over The Undertaker!
Winner: Edge
Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels in a Career Threatening Match
You know there were a lot of guys saying Brett Favre should have retired long before he did, and these two men are no strangers to that. These are two men who are past their prime, one way further than the other. But here they are, at Wrestlemania, just begging you to bet on their match. Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels are practically saying “Here, I want to send your kids through college, build you a 10 bedroom house, and get you hookers that ELLIOT SPITZER couldn’t afford!†But how are they doing it? I hear all of you asking it right now. How are they doing it? How ARENT they doing it. Did you matches at Mania with guys 5 years or more past their prime favor the blonder of the two? Did you also know that the older Ric Flair gets, the saggier his moobs become. The saggier they are, the more chance there is that they will lactate all over the ring, raising the chances that HBK will slip when he is trying to deliver Sweet Chin Music. Bottom line, bet the cow, the horse, the pigs, chickens, and horses on RIC FLAIR at Wrestlemania 25.
Winner: Ric Flair
John Cena vs. HHH vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Title
Now we come to the main event of the evening. Three men who want nothing but to be champion. But only one of them really has a chance. Randy Orton suffers from Mayweather Sybdrome, cockiness with no proven track record. Orton has only won at ONE of the 24 Wrestlemania’s and that is a sorry record. The only thing worse than Randy Orton’s Mania record, is RVD’s arrest record. Not only does his record suck at Mania, he is not a triple threat monster. Randy Orton, in matches with guys whose name is part of the match name, IE ‘TRIPLE’ H, is a pathetic 3-71 all time. Don’t let your money get anywhere near him. The last two men in the match, John Cena and HHH, have their own legacy at Wrestlemania. John Cena is undefeated, HHH has lost at every one he has been in since Wrestlemania 20, all of them title matches. Cena has defeated The Big Show, HBK, and HHH himself. HHH has LOST to Chris Benoit, Batista, and John Cena. The bookies who refuse to put this on the boards in Vegas would have you bet on Cena, but NO, NO, NO! I’m not doing it, don’t you do it either! HHH is going to win, and he is going to win for ONE SIMPLE REASON. The law of averages. That’s right. Wrestlers, in the main event of PPVs in March who are banging the bosses daughter and have sired him one grandchild with another on the way have NEVER gone more than 0-3 in a streak. According to my stats, HHH is due, he is due big, and he is going to make all of your dreams COME TRUE!
Winner: HHH
THERE YOU HAVE IT FOLKS Stu Finers time tested Wrestlemania picks. I picked these matches JUST for you, and when you are rollin down the street in your Escalade to your bookies house so he can give you the fat cash, YOU TELL HIM STEWIE SENT YA!
Phew, that guy is full of energy isn’t he? Well now that we have made ourselves millions of dollars, lets get on with Kaedon’s YBTB Challenge. Switchy accepted the challenge but didn’t show up by the count of 10 so he has forefitted his title. He will, however, receive the first match after we determine the new champ. This week we have Monkeystyles and CMS along with our judges Soulpower, The Leviathan, and myself.
I asked MS and CMS to book a TNA Invasion of the WWE, and here is what they did, starting with CMS.
Current Champions:
WWE Champion: Triple H
World Heavyweight Champion: The Undertaker
ECW Champion: CM Punk
TNA Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle
Intercontinental Champion: Chris Jericho
US Champion: MVP
X-Division Champion: Jay Lethal
WWE Tag Team Champions: Jesse & Festus
World Tag Team Champions: The Hardys(Jeff and Matt reunited after Matt’s failed attempts for the US Title and Jeff coming back from suspension)
TNA Tag Team Champions: Motor City Machine Guns
WWE Women’s Champion: Mickie James
TNA Knockout’s Champion: Amazing Kong
MITB: Chris Jericho
Sunday 5th, October 2008: No Mercy PPV
The Undertaker retains his WHC against Big Show
CM Punk defeats Shelton Benjamin to retain the ECW Title
John Cena defeats Triple H by making him tap, becoming the WWE Title
- After the match, Kurt Angle comes out with a TNA shirt and the TNA World Title.
He beats up the celebrating John Cena. He calls someone from backstage, and the
TNA roster (except for Christian Cage and the already determined in stips) come
out and beat up both Triple H and John Cena.
Monday 6th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Kurt Angle comes out with rest of TNA wrestlers. He cuts a promo by saying how
TNA might be now own by WWE, but their spirit doesn’t, and they will keep it alive, and will make WWE explode from the inside out. He says he was in the WCW/ECW invasion, and knows what and what not to do, and will lead this alliance. Vince comes out with a group of WWE wrestlers to protect himself. He argues with Kurt. Angle then invites any WWE superstar to accept a match against one of his own. Triple H comes out and accepts. Angle says how fitting it is, as his opponent will be Booker T. A brawl between Booker and HHH start, then followed by the rest of TNA/WWE wrestlers. Kurt and Vince get out of the ring.
Mickie James/Candice Michelle defeat Beth Phoenix/Melina. Afterwards Amazing King, Gail Kim, ODB, Salinas, Angelina Love, Traci Brooks, Velvet Sky and Jacqueline attack. Maria, Ashley, Kelly-Kelly, Torrie Wilson, Layla, Michelle McCool and Eve try to make the save, but the TNA knockouts win the brawl
Triple H defeats Booker T by DQ as Angle interferes. Both Angle and Booker go to attack HHH but John Cena comes out and makes the save.
Tuesday 7th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- CM Punk cuts a promo saying that with all the melee going on ECW. One thing remains the same, he is ECW Champion. Shelton Benjamin comes out and says that on No Mercy it was a fluke. He challenges Punk for a rematch tonight, Punk accepts.
Big Daddy V defeats Sharkboy
- Punk runs to Samoa Joe backstage. They talk about how they go way back and
have had amazing matches
CM Punk defeats Shelton Benjamin to retain the ECW Title. After the match Rhino comes out and he Gores Punk, then poses with the ECW Title.
Friday 10th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Mark Henry defeats Sharkboy
Kane defeats The Great Khali. Lights go out and then turn red. Abyss comes down to ringside and stares with Kane.
MCMG defeat Deuce and Domino
Winner gets a WHC match next week Fatal Four Way
Edge defeats Batista, Big Show and Finlay
Monday 13th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Vince comes out and cuts a promo. He says that to win this battle against TNA, WWE has to be united. He says that from now on the Brand Extension does no longer exist. He also says that during the course of the next weeks the WWE titles will be unified, culminating at InVasion, the PPV that will substitute Cyber Sunday, with a Triple Threat between the WWE Champion, the World Heavyweight Champion and the ECW Champion. And this will start this week as the US title and the IC Title get unified. He also says that at InVasion a 20 man 10 vs 10 Battle Royal will be held.
The Hardyz defeat LAX
Scott Steiner defeats Mr. Kennedy. He then cuts a promo of how he is so dominating.
IC Champion Chris Jericho defeats US Champ MVP to unify the belts.
Amazing Kong defeats Ashley
- HBK gets interviewed. He makes an open challenge for any TNA wrestler at SD.
Triple H and John Cena defeat Kurt Angle and Booker T as Cena makes Booker tap out to the STFU. Triple H then challengers Booker T for a match at InVasion (match is later accepted on WWE.com)
Tuesday 14th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- Scott Steiner comes out and says he dominated on Raw last night, and will do the same at ECW.
Scott Steiner defeats Stevie Richards
Umaga defeats VKM
AJ Styles defeats Cody Rhodes
- Randy Orton meets AJ Styles backstage. Orton says that for a TNA guy, AJ can
Take good care of business.
Abyss defeats Hardcore Holly. Fire came out from turnbuckles in a Kane mind game.
Rhino defeats CM Punk thanks to Samoa Joe interfering.
Friday 17th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Randy Orton defeats Lance Hoyt.
- AJ Styles and Orton backstage. Styles says Randy is not that bad for a WWE guy.
- Scott Steiner promo. He says Smackdown will be another step in his domination path.
Scott Steiner defeats The Miz. Batista comes out afterwards and says SD is his land, and it’s where he is dominant. Scott Steiner says he has only been dominant with WWE losers, not with TNA talent.
World Tag Team Champions The Hardyz defeat WWE Tag Champions Jesse & Festus to unify the belts.
IC/US Unified Champion Chris Jericho defeats MVP in a US Title rematch. He then cuts a promo about a big announcement concerning his MITB at Raw.
- Edge runs into Christian, making his WWE “debut/returnâ€. Christian says he doesn’t care about the whole WWE/TNA stuff, that Edge and him are forever, and they reek awesomeness.
HBK defeats Jay Lethal.
The Undertaker defeats Edge to retain the WHC. Christian then comes out and he and Edge both beat down Taker.
Monday 20th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
Batista defeats Brother Ray and Brother D-Von. Scott Steiner was in commentary.
- AJ Styles mentions Randy Orton that he should jump to the TNA bunch, the rising ship, and not in WWE, the sinking one. Randy thinks he will think about it.
Winner faces The Hardys for the World Tag Team Unified Belts at InVasion
Londrick vs Deuce and Domino vs Jesse and Festus vs Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch goes to a No Contest after MCMG interfere.
- JBL runs into Kurt Angle backstage. He says he will show him later tonight why you don’t mess with the WWE. Angle accepts the challenge
AJ Styles defeats Carlito. After the match Randy Orton comes out and he RKOs AJ Styles, giving him a negative answer about joining TNA.
HBK defeat Tomko by DQ when James Storm comes out. Storm says he is the real deal and will prove it to him at InVasion.
Mickie James defeat ODB
- HHH/Booker T have their contract signing. They argue and it ends with Triple H hitting the pedigree on Booker T.
Kurt Angle defeat JBL. After the match, Chris Jericho comes out and says that he came back to save the WWE. And he will finally do it, as he saves WWE from Kurt Angle, as he will cash in Money in the Bank at InVasion for the TNA World Title.
Tuesday 21st, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi.
Samoa Joe defeats Chavo Guerrero
Batista defeats Kaz. Scott Steiner then says to Batista to cut the crap, that he is just fooling around, and that at InVasion he will meet truly what TNA has to offer, as he goes on one with him. Batista accepts. Scott seems to be leaving but then cheap shots him.
- John Cena meets CM Punk backstage. He says that even if he retains tonight against Rhino, he’s losing at Sunday. Punk says that Cena not only has to go through him, but over Undertaker, but in the end, it would be him, CM Punk, to leave Undisputed Champion.
Black Reign defeats John Morrison
- The Hardyz come out, they say that they don’t have challengers, but the team that impress them is MCMG, the TNA Tag Team Champions. They challenge them with their titles on the line at InVasion.
Kane and Abyss get into a huge brawl. Abyss was in the ring and called out Kane, with Kane then answered.
CM Punk defeats Rhino to retain the ECW Title.
Friday 24th, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown.
John Cena defeats CM Punk
- Kurt Angle and says he is not only causing chaos on Raw, as he is also on Smackdown doing it. He then rants on Chris Jericho. Kurt then goes to the outside and trying not be two obvious, he comes close to the Coach, then grabs him and starts attacking him, finally locking an Angle Lock. EMT’s rush to help The Coachman. Angle says he has a qualified substitute, and he brings out Jim Cornette.
Big Daddy V and Mark Henry destroy Super Eric
AJ Styles defeats Randy Orton with a rollup.
- Scott Steiner until he gets mulled by Batista, they brawl until security separates them.
- Edge and Christian meet backstage. Christian says he has gotten them opponents for InVasion for their reunion match. Edge wishes Christian good luck.
Big Show and Umaga defeat LAX
- MCMG backstage in a taped promo. They accept Hardyz challenge with the World Tag Team titles on the line.
Undertaker defeats Christian. Edge tries to interfere but gets stopped by Cena and Punk. Show ends with Taker and Punk in a huge staredown.
Sunday 26th, October 2008: InVasion PPV
World Tag Team Title Match
TNA Tag Team Champions MCMG defeat The Hardyz to win the belts
Batista defeats Scott Steiner
HBK defeats James Storm. Storm then went for a beatdown after the match had ended but Chris Harris made his WWE debut saving HBK.
Booker T defeats Triple H. The referee got knocked out and Booker planted HHH with a chair, then covering him.
The Dudleys defeat Edge and Christian. Christian turned on Edge, planting him with the Unprettier. The Dudleyz then covered him.
- Kurt Angle says that for the Battle Royal, he is bringing the ultimate talent from
TNA, with some even making their WWE debut.
20 Man Team Battle Royal
AJ Styles, Tomko, Rhino, Kevin Nash, Robert Roode, Jay Lethal, Samoa Joe, Homicide, Hernandez, Abyss defeats Randy Orton, Big Show, Umaga, MVP, Mr. Kennedy, Kane, Finlay, JBL, Carlito, Kofi Kingston, when Big Show turned in WWE and he eliminated Randy Orton, the last man left along with him. AJ Styles and Big Show survived for TNA.
Kurt Angle defeats Y2J after several distractions from TNA wrestlers
WWE Champion John Cena defeats ECW Champion CM Punk and WHC The Undertaker to become the Undisputed Champion.
Monday 27th, October 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Kurt Angle promo. He comes out and says last night TNA proved why they are better than WWE. Not only he defeated Y2J and remained TNA World Champion, but most of his TNA wrestlers defeated his WWE opponents at InVasion. Chris Jericho comes out. He says last night he was cheated, and wants a rematch tonight. Angle says he might consider giving another title match if he manages to retain his IC title against one of his wrestler. Jericho says he will take any TNA loser. Angle presents Christian Cage as his opponent.
Mr. Kennedy defeats Robert Roode
Big Show defeats Finlay
Booker T defeats HBK by DQ, as Triple H comes out and attacks Booker with the sledgehammer.
Christian Cage defeats Chris Jericho to win the IC Title. Edge tried to attack Christian Cage but Y2J sent him to the back refusing his help.
- Vince Mcmahon comes out and says he is sick of it. He says he owns all and TNA wrestlers are his employees, and he is firing them all. Kurt appears on the Tron and invites him to do it, so that he gets another lawsuit riot on his hands.
John Cena retains the Undisputed Title against The Undertaker
Tuesday 28th, October 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
- CM Punk comes out and cuts a promo. He says that tonight he has a chance to become Undisputed Champion. Samoa Joe then comes out and says there is no chance you win that belt, in fact there is no chance he wins anything. Samoa Joe leaves.
Scott Steiner and Abyss defeat Kane and Batista
Randy Orton defeats AJ Styles
Umaga defeats Rock N’ Rave Infection
- James Storm and Chris Harris run into each other backstage. In an awkward moment, with tension in the air, Storm says is good to see Harris again
John Cena defeats CM Punk to retain the Undisputed Title. Samoa Joe comes out to the stage and he mocks Punk.
Friday 31st, October 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
Randy Orton defeats AJ Styles by DQ as Big Show comes out and attacks him.
MVP defeats Curryman
- Jay Lethal meets Vince Mcmahon backstage. Vince says his X-division title is like the Cruiserweight Title, and therefore needs to be unified. On Raw he will face the last Cruiserweight Champion.
Edge defeats Christian by count-out as Christian just walks out of the match
Batista and Kane defeat Abyss and Scott Steiner. Lights go out and Taker appears on ring, making everybody flee.
Monday 3rd, November 2008: Monday Night Raw
- Vince comes out. He says that Kurt Angle was right last week. He just can’t fire everybody and face all the lawsuits. But, he is Mr. Mcmahon, the boss, and he still calls the shots. He says that from now on, every WWE vs TNA match will be Job on the Line match, and the loser will get fire, except if you are a champion
X-Division Champion Jay Lethal defeats Last Cruiserweight Champion Hornswoggle to unify the belts. Hornswoggle loses his job.
- HHH and HBK cut a promo backstage as DX. They say that some time ago, there was team calling them out. Well, tonight, DX will face them with their jobs on the line.
DX defeats VKM making Kip James and BG James lose their jobs. Triple after the match grabs a mic and tells Booker that he is next.
Tuesday 4th, November 2008:
Big Show defeats Tommy Dreamer making Dreamer lose his job.
- The Hardyz come out. They say it’s only fitting for Team Xtreme to make this announcement on ECW. They say they have a rematch clause and that they are invoking it at Survivor Series at against the MCMG.
CM Punk defeats Elijah Burke. Samoa Joe comes out and he beats down CM Punk
Friday 7th, November 2008:
- Scott Steiner meets Batista backstage. Steiner says Batista is lucky he is not facing him tonight, because if it were, Batista would lose his job. Batista then says to watch his match carefully, because one of his “friends†would indeed lose his job.
Umaga defeats RelliK. RelliK loses his job.
Batista defeats Petey Williams. Williams loses his job.
- MCMG come out. They accept the challenge of The Hardyz.
Big Show defeats Super Crazy and Jim Duggan making them lose their job.
- Christian is leaving the arena. Edge catches him and stops him. Edge challenges him for a match at Survivor Series. Christian is hesitant, Edge says what is to afraid, after all your job won’t be on the line because you are a champion. Christian accepts.
Chris Harris defeats MVP by DQ when James Storm attacked him.
Abyss defeats Kane. Kane loses his job. Lights go out and Taker appears in the ring. He grabs Kane, lights go out again and neither Taker or Kane are in the ring.
Monday 10th, November 2008: Monday Night Raw
Big Show defeats Finlay making him lose his job.
- Kurt Angle comes out and says it is funny how TNA has cleaned the WWE roster. But it is time for the ultimate challenge. He calls Vince out. Vince comes out. Kurt says that for Survivor Series, it will be 5 of his TNA wrestlers, against 5 of his WWE losers, and that 5 losers will get fired. Vince accepts. He then says that speaking of that, he notices that Kurt is still World Champion, and it so happens that WWE has also a World Champion. Kurt says John Cena is no World Champion. Vince says Kurt has talked a lot, but he has to back it up, he challenges Kurt to face John Cena, with not only their jobs, but both titles on the line at Survivor Series. Kurt accepts.
MCMG defeat The Dudleyz
Batista defeats Jimmy Rave making him lose his job. Batista is then announced as one of the members of Team WWE.
- Triple H enters Cena’s locker room. He says he better be ready for Survivor Series, but quite frankly he doesn’t trust him. HHH says Cena has to prove that he is worthy of that challenge. Cena says he is on for tonight.
JBL defeats Super Eric, making him lose his job. JBL is announced as one of the members of Team WWE.
- Booker T is interviewed backstage. He accepts HHH challenge, saying he has been waiting almost all his career to end HHH’s.
Gail Kim defeats Maryse making here lose his job. Knockouts where on Kim corner and Divas where on Maryse’s.
John Cena defeats Triple H. Kurt and Booker T try to enter the ring and attack them but HHH and Cena see them before they do. They remain in a staredown.
WWE.com announces Chris Harris vs James Storm at Survivor Series
Tuesday 11th, November 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi.
Big Show cuts a promo saying he will be in TNA’s team at Survivor Series. He then defeats Finlay making him lose his job.
- MVP and Mr. Kennedy meet backstage. They say they are the future of the company. They will tag on SD to make two TNA wrestlers lose their jobs
Randy Orton defeats Elix Skipper. Skipper loses his job. Randy is announced as a member of Team WWE.
The Hardyz defeat Miz & Morrison
TNA Exhibition Match
Nash is announced as a member of Team TNA. Kevin Nash vs Samoa Joe goes to a No Contest when CM Punk interferes and attacks Joe.
Friday 14th, November 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
- Cutting Edge. Edge invites Christian Cage. They talk about their past and how the first time they separated, Edge kicked Christian ass. Segment appears to be over but Christian cheap shots Edge.
MVP and Mr. Kennedy defeat Lance Hoyt and Black Reign making them lose their job.
Scott Steiner defeats Charlie Hass. Hass loses his job. Steiner is announced as a member of Team TNA.
- Samoa Joe comes out and he says CM Punk has always been jealous of him, and on Tuesday it was more than clear. He says that on Sunday he will end Punk’s suffering, as he will lose his job and will not have to worry about wrestling anymore.
- Vince Mcmahon meets Jay Lethal backstage. He asks him if he is still a part of TNA. Lethal says he is. Vince tells him not to be dumb, he is already a WWE Champion, and when TNA disappears from the WWE landscape, he doesn’t want to be in the boss’s bad side.
Abyss defeats Snitksy. Snitksy loses his job. Gong plays as lights go out. Taker says Abyss played with fire, he messed with his brother, and it’s time he gets burned. “You…me…Survivor Series!â€
WWE.com announces Chris Jericho as a member of Team WWE.
Monday 17th, November 2008: Monday Night Raw:
The Hardys defeat The Dudleyz after a failed run in by MCMG. The Dudleyz lose their jobs.
- Jay Lethal accepts Vince’s offer. He is desserts from TNA.
- JBL meets Robert Roode backstage. He says that Lethal is a smart man. He knows Robert is one as well, and that deep inside he knows WWE is the way to know. JBL leaves leaving Roode thinking it.
AJ Styles and Tomko defeat Drew McIntyre and Dave Taylor. McIntyre and Taylor lose their jobs. Styles and Tomko are announced as members of Team TNA.
- HHH is walking backstage, when out of a sudden Team TNA and Booker T assault him. HHH is left knocked out.
Chris Harris vs Robert Roode never happens as Roode comes out and says he is from WWE now, and will not fight him. James Storm comes out and from behind attack both of them.
- Vince books a WWE Exhibition Match, claiming that if TNA can do it, damn sure they can.
WWE Exhibition Match
HBK defeats Chris Jericho. HBK is announced as a member of Team WWE
- Cena and Kurt sign their contract for their match at Survivor Series, they talk about their respective title belts and what it means for them. Cena is leaving when from behind Kurt Angle grabs him and locks him in the Ankle Lock. Cena taps out.
Tuesday 18th, November 2008: ECW on Sci-Fi
Matt Hardy defeats Alex Shelley. Because Shelley is Tag Team Champion, he maintains his job. Hardyz and MCMG brawl afterwards.
- CM Punk accepts Samoa Joe’s challenge for Survivor Series.
Divas Team’s Match
Mickie James, Melina, Beth Pheonix, Victoria and Candice Michelle defeat Gail Kim, ODB, Velvet Sky, Salinas, Roxxy Laveoux and Traci Brooks. TNA knockouts in the match lose their jobs.
- Christian Cage’s Peepshow is interrupted by Edge, that spears him from behind.
WWE.com announces Kurt Angle vs Jay Lethal as a punishment for Lethal because of him deserting to WWE.
Friday 21st, November 2008: Friday Night Smackdown
- Roode wishes Lethal good luck against Angle later on tonight.
Undertaker defeats Rhino. Rhino loses his job. Taker taunts to Abyss that had come out to the stage.
- Booker T is walking backstage along with Team TNA. HHH and Team WWE attack them. Team WWE and Team TNA brawl, and HHH brawls with Booker T.
Kurt Angle defeats Jay Lethal. Because Jay is a champion he doesn’t lose his job. Angle goes for post match beat down, but John Cena comes out and makes the save. He locks in the STFU on Kurt Angle. EMTs and officials have to come out to force John Cena to release the hold.
Sunday 23rd, November 2008: Survivor Series PPV
The Hardys defeat World Tag Team Champions and TNA Tag Team Champions MCMG to win the World tag Team Champions. Because the MCMG are champs, they don’t lose their jobs.
CM Punk and Samoa Joe ends in a tie thanks to a double count-out.
The Undertaker defeats Abyss. Abyss loses his job.
Triple H defeats Booker T, making Booker T lose his job.
Edge defeats Christian. Christian is a champion, so he doesn’t lose his job.
James Storm defeats Chris Harris. Harris loses his job.
Team WWE (Orton, Batista, HBK, Y2J and JBL) defeat Team TNA (AJ, Tomko, Steiner, Nash, Big Show). Team TNA loses their jobs.
WWE Undisputed Champion John Cena defeats TNA Heavyweight Champion Kurt Angle to win the TNA title. Angle loses his job.
WOW, that is a lot. Now onto MS
TNA Invasion
Prelude:
At WM 24 Vince Mcmahon announces that he has purchased TNA from Panda Energy. Vince declines to comment on the aquisition until the following night on Raw as WM is about WWE stars.
Important Match info:
Undertaker d. Edge via Tombstone to win World Heavyweight title
HHH d. Randy Orton and John Cena to win WWE title after HHH nails Orton with a pedigree and makes the pinfall.
Week 1 (Raw):
The show opens with the usual pyro and "No Chance in Hell" plays over the PA as Vince makes his way to the ring.
Vince says that he has made history again by buying out his competition. Except this time he didn't do it because they were going out of business, he did it because he developed a taste for crushing dreams. Vince states that all TNA wrestlers are fired and will not be appearing on Raw. After all he has more talent than he needs, and he doesn't need a group of second rate wrestlers cluttering up his well oiled machine.
Vince gets pensive for a moment and says that well, that' snot true. There is one man whom he has rehired. "Gold Medal" plays over the PA and Kurt Angle makes his way to the ring to deafening cheers from the crowd.
Vince hands Kurt a mic, and Kurt says "Thank you Vince. I just want to say I'm sorry. I never should've left you two years ago. You were right. You did know what was best for me, and I promise you that you'll get a wrestling machine at 100% starting tonight." Kurt hugs Vince and then they shake hands. Vince says that Kurt was always welcome to return and he didn't know why Angle ever left in the first place. Vince states that there will be a clean slate starting now and all past transgressions will be forgotten.
Angle again thanks Vince and says that he is an Olympic gold medalist, and a champion, and he would like a shot at HHH for the WWE title at Backlash.
Vince replies by telling Angle that he'd love to give him that, because after all, Angle's always been like a son to him, but John Cena has a rematch at Backlash with HHH as he was not pinned in the triple threat. Vince instead tells Angle that he will wrestle Randy Orton in a Number 1 Contender match at Backlash and the winner will face HHH at The Great American Bash. Angle accepts the match, and Vince says that Angle will have a tune up match tonight against Cody Rhodes.
Kurt Angle vs Cody Rhodes
The match takes place at the top of the 10 o'clock hour and features Angle winning handily via the ankle lock.
Later Kurt is shown celebrating backstage in his locker room, Vince joins him and tells him to go home and enjoy his victory.
After a commercial break Kurt is shown leaving the arena and heading to his car when he is jumped by Christian Cage, AJ Styles, Tomko, Christopher Daniels and Eric Young, who lay a beat down on Kurt and leave him laying.
Week 2 (Raw):
The show once again opens with Vince coming to the ring, his usual swagger absent and replaced with a furious determination. Vince addresses the TNA employees who jumped Angle last week by saying that he could call the police and have them arrested since they are not WWE employees, but instead decides to offer them the opportunity to settle this like men in the ring. Vince states that he will give the TNA wrestlers a 10 man tag team match at Backlash, and if they win he will grant the five of them contracts. He says that he wants a response by next week and offers them the opportunity to reply to him face to face next week on Raw.
Week 3 (Raw):
At the top of the 10 o'clock hour Vince swaggers out to the ring, and invites the TNA wrestlers to join him and give him their response.
Cage, Styles, Tomko, Daniels, and Young make their way to the ring without entrance music, and Cage is handed a mic by Vince to respond for the TNA team.
Cage states that the terms are not acceptable to them as even if they get jobs there will still be an entire company of guys out of work.
Vince tells them to take it or leave it. Cage tells him to stick his offer, and that they are going to make Vince's life hell.
Cage and crew leave the ring and the arena in short order. While Vince fumes over being turned down.
Week 4: (Smackdown)
Cage and crew are shown at ringside having purchased front row seats.
Undertaker vs. John Morrison (Non-title match)
Undertaker controls this match with Morrison getting in spurts of offense when Eric Young throws a full cup of soda at Undertaker's head while his back is turned. Undertaker turns to face the five TNA wrestlers and argues with them from the ring daring them to come in. Morrison rolls up Undertaker from behind and scores a shock pinfall with his feet on the ropes.
Backlash:
Vince states in a backstage vignette that he will again meet with the TNA wrestlers on Raw and will hear what their requests are for a match, as at this point he just wants their blood.
Important match info:
Undertaker d. Edge to retain the WHC.
Kurt Angle d. Randy Orton with the Angle Slam to become the number one contender.
HHH d. John Cena to retain the WWE title.
Week 5 (Raw):
The show opens with Vince calling the TNA crew to the ring. Cage, Styles, Tomko, Daniels, and Young again make their way into the ring. Vince hands Cage the mic and tells him to make his pitch.
Cage says that they will meet 5 of Vince's best in the ring under the following circumstances.
If Team TNA wins:
- All the TNA wrestlers that were under contract before the buy out will again have contracts to wrestle.
- ECW will be renamed TNA Impact and they will wrestle on that show.
Cage also states that since Vince likes to buy out companies and crush dreams he wants to resurrect an old match from WCW. The TNA Team will meet Team WWE in a 5 on 5 War Games match at One Night Stand. These are the terms that they will agree to, and only these terms.
Vince looks pensive for a moment and tells them that they are on. The only stipulation that he will add is that if Team TNA loses they will leave and never darken his doorstep again. Cage agrees with this and the match is on. Vince announces that he will reveal his team next week on Raw. He invites them all to be here again next week for the announcement.
Week 6 (Raw):
The TNA wrestlers are shown in the back in their own locker room awaiting the announcement of the team.
Vince makes his way to the ring, and announces that his team will be Kurt Angle, HHH, the Undertaker, Batista, and JBL. Kurt Angle gets distrustful stares from all members of his team as the announcement is made.
Vince also states that the contract signing will be next week live on Raw.
Later JBL asks Vince why he would agree to those stipulations stated last week. Vince says that its all about money. At One Night Stand his team will crush team TNA, and each of Team WWE and himself will make a nice pay day and TNA will be gone forever. JBL loving money, loves the idea and calls Vince a genius.
Week 7 (Raw):
The show opens with Team WWE running interference between Team TNA preventing them from aiding Eric Young who sustains a vicious beatdown from the Undertaker leaving him bloody and broken in the parking lot.
Later Young is shown being loaded in an ambulance having suffered sever head truama from taking several tombstone piledrivers on the asphalt.
In what is effectively the main event Team WWE with Vince makes their way to the ring, which is decked out for the contract signing. Team TNA follows less Eric Young.
Vince crows about them being in teh big leagues and not trifiling with Vince McMahon.
Styles snatches a mic and says it doesn't matter if its 4 on 5 or 5 on 5 they will beat them. Vince patronizingly pats Styles on the head and tells him to just keep on beileving that while team WWE guffaws behind him.
Vince signs the contract on behalf of team WWE, and hands the contract to Cage. Cage hesitates and eventually signs the contract.
Immediately after the contract is signed team WWE jumps team TNA and begins beating on them weakening them up for One Night Stand. The numbers advantage proves to be too much and team TNA is suffering a severe beating when a husky man in a hoodie jumps the guard rail and starts laying into team WWE with lefts and rights. He throws Angle into the corner as teh momentum shifts, he takes off his hoodie to reveal himself as Samoa Joe. Joe hits Angle with a musclebuster and throws him out of the ring as team TNA gets to their feet and embrace Joe.
One Night Stand:
War Games Match:
Christian Cage, AJ Styles, Tomko, Christopher Daniels, and Samoa Joe vs. HHH, Kurt Angle, the Undertaker, Batista, and JBL.
The match is violent and bloody with team WWE gaining the one man advantage throughout the entire match.
The finish comes when Christian Cage is waiting for Kurt Angle to get up off the mat so that he might hit the unprettier. In a moment of prescience Cage looks behind him and sees HHH swinging a chair at his head. Cage ducks and HHH plasters Angle in the face knocking him out cold. Samoa Joe tackles HHH and Cage gets on top of Angle and began laying stiff punches to his head forcing the referee to call the match as Angle had been knocked totall unconscious.
Team TNA celebrates in the ring as Vince looks on in complete and utter shock and what has transpired.
Onto the judges decisions
The Leviathan
Monkeystyles' Work
You've really focused on the fued between Vince Mcmahon and the TNA which lead by Christian Cage. I think Cage makes a great leader of a faction like that, he managed to give some heat with the WWE Chairman as they go on the rivalry. The only thing I can't imagine is about Angle, joining back to WWE, I think he won't do that after the issues between him and WWE. The interference part of Team TNA during Taker's match really adds some heat to it that makes the fued more interesting. Having a War Games type of match is really a great ending of the storyline. Overall your work is really fascinating, great job.
CMS' Work
Your storyline is also quite interesting as TNA invades every superstars of WWE and show how great they are compared to WWE. The matches were the loser will lose his job is quite okay to say how he will be release from the company in kayfabe terms. There are some questions I wanna ask though, like the Unifications between the World and WWE Tag and the U.S. and the Intercontinental titles. Why did you do that? I think TNA don't involve in those things. Some storylines are unecessary tbh, like the Steiner/Batista one. You're storyline is quite similar from the WCW/WWF invasion to me.
Overall: Okay! As what I said, both storylines are great but my vote will go to Monkeystyles' work. I am sorry CMS but MS showed the focal point and that's the TNA and WWE. You've also managed to show it but there are some unecessary storylines to me that don't made a point in the TNA/WWE Rivalry. So my vote will be MS' one.
Rating:
Monkeystyles - 8/10
CMS - 7/10
Soulpower
MS scores a 9/10. The fact that it was a bit short prevented me from giving it a perfect score. I loved the fact that you brought back Wargames, for one because I'm a big fan of the match, and two, its a great way to settle a feud between the two companies. I liked that Joe's debut was held back and he was made to look like a big deal by helping team TNA and taking out Kurt Angle.
I also would have liked to see the mistrust between the WWE stars and Angle to have been played up a bit more.
Still, it was a great read with a surprise finish and that always helps.
As for CMS' BTB. It gets an 8/10. I hated the fact that he kept the TNA titles because we ended up with a shitload of titles and there's no way that all of them could be relevant. I loved the fact that you decided to book some matches between WWE and TNA talent because it gives us fresh-matchups. I also didn't like that TNA lost all the big matches at Survivor Series. It was bad enough that Angle lost to Cena, but add in team TNA losing to team WWE and we end up with a retread of the WCW Invasion Angle.
Basically, WWE was made to look all mighty while TNA was made to look like a lesser fed.
Still, even with its flaws it was a good BTB.
Kaedon
Well it all seems kind of moot now but here we go.
MS: Yours was a little on the thin side, content wise. Like not because it was short, but because you didn’t take the Invasion anywhere but Raw. I mean you have 3 shows to work with. Also, you brought back Christopher Daniel when, I believe he isn’t a member of TNA anymore. Finally, the alignment of each side was unclear, to say the least. Who were the faces and who were the heels? Other than that, I loved yours. I pray to God we get to see a War Games match at least one more time. The stipulations of the match are great, especially renaming ECW “TNA Impactâ€. Just great, great shit. 7.5/10
CMS: Yours was way too long. Way, way, wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too long. The reason I put word limits on I because eventually it gets boring to read. Add to that, your booking was very spotty. I mean you included semi in depth stuff about guys like Jay Lethal and Robert Roode and they didn’t have any affect on the final outcome at the SS. Also, a SP said you made the WWE come off looking recockulously strong. Finally, Kurt lost to Cena, he didn’t have the title, he should have been fired. On the plus side, I like how you did get something on everyone. It didn’t have to be a much as you did, just a line or 2, but it was still good. I like how you didn’t go right for the multiman tag because that’s a bit too predictable. Also, some of the matches you came up with, fit PEFECTLY, like Steiner vs. Batista. Good stuff man. 7/10
And with that Monkeystyle is the new NSZ BTB Champion! That was a BARN BURNER! And since Switchy was a no show, he gets first dibs at the next match!
Well that it for the NSZ this week. Thank for taking 5 years out of your life to read it. Next week, its going to be a Wrestlemania edition of FACT or FICTION! See ya next week!
hope 90% of ya predictions for mania happen then il b a happy little bunny lmao keep up the wicked threads