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These are just the worst, aren't they? The poor law student in me feels compelled to tell you that no judge would ever let custody hinge on the result of something like a wrestling match. Kayfabe's, like, totally dead man.
I just want to be a fly on the wall when Kurt Angle helps put his PPV matches together. "Yeah, that's great, but here's the thing. This would be perfect if it had like 6 more finishers and kickouts."