We open up the January 22nd edition of Precision with some riffs of Def Leppard as Gabriel Kirkshaw saunters down the ramp, a disgusting look of glee on his face. How could he be so proud of himself after the previous week’s transgressions, attacking a man from behind the way he did? He looks to his right, then to his left, apparently taking no mind to the chorus of boos and slurs hurled at him from angry fans all around him. As he climbs up into the ring, he seemingly mouths the words “You shouldn’t be surprised”, and once in the ring, walks a half-circle around the far side of the ring before poking out of the second rope, holding his hand out for a microphone. Once he had it, he then leaned against the corner, looking about as he began to mock the Scottish crowd around him.
Kirkshaw: Awwh, c’mon Glasgow! You shouldn’t be surprised! I mean, who’s to say that if I didn’t do it, that no one else would’ve come out here and shut his pathetic, whiny mouth?
His insult resulted in a mixture of “boos” and “You suck!” chants.
Kirkshaw: I suck? I suck--hey, jerkasses, I’m not the one who was out here talking smack last week. It was terrible listening to Diamond’s childish rants-- "Aw, but a ref screwed me! He didn’t see my leg under the bottom rope! I should’ve gotten the 1-2-3!" ...keep up the talk, Diamond, but as much as you bitch, as much as you may whine, you are the one causing crap backstage. You are the one taking time out in the limelight while others--such as myself, one-half of your prestigious tag team champions--
He holds up the belt that he’s referring to before continuing...
Kirkshaw: --are looking for mere minutes of your TV time. Your time out here is up--!
Right as Kirkshaw’s rambling was about to reach it’s climax, the horns of Diamonds from Sierra Leone echo around the *insert arena here*, and after 20 seconds of strobe lights and pyrotechnics, Joseph Diamond emerges from the back, sunglass on eye and microphone in hand. He doesn’t look especially thrilled with Kirkshaw.
Diamond: I’m sorry to interrupt your coming out party, I really am, Kirk. But you just said something that, well, it doesn’t sit right with me. You called yourself one half of the tag team champions, and you act as though that should bring you some sort of esteem, some elevation over the roster, but all that belt shows is that you couldn’t get it done on your own. You say my time is up, but that’s absurd. I’m just getting started and if you, or any of the other little kids in the back think that you can replace me, think that you can make a name for yourself against ME? The Longest. Reigning. Intercontinental Champion in HISTORY? A man, who went undefeated for two months before he was SCREWED at WrestleDynasty? Maybe you should drop wrestling and become a stand up comic.
Before replying to Diamond, Kirkshaw glares into the hard camera, yelling into his mic...
Kirkshaw: All right, that’s it! Cut his mic! Cut it!
...before turning back to face the former Intercontinental Champion, angrily glaring a hole right through him as he slowly paces towards him across the ring.
Kirkshaw: Let’s get one thing straight, Joey. That’s right, you were Intercontinental Champion. Key word being were. Thing is, currently in this ring, there’s only one man carrying a belt between the two of us.
At this point, despite having no mic, Diamond could clearly be heard quipping right back at the tag champion.
Diamond: Well, obviously. I’m on the ramp, you idiot!
Kirkshaw: Yeah, that’s right! Because you have no guts to tie your laces and climb up into this ring with a champion such as myself. Let’s get one thing straight, Diamond, you claim to be just as unbreakable as your namesake? Mere delusion, I say. You may think you’re unbreakable, but I don’t have to break you to beat you. If you think otherwise, why don’t you prove it tough guy? Right here and now!
Diamond whips the sunglasses off of his face then storms the ring and is greeted by clubbing blows from Kirkshaw, but those aren’t enough to keep Diamond down, who takes out the legs of Kirkshaw and starts WAILING on the tag team champion, Kirkshaw is able to catch Diamond with a rake to the eye and retreat to the corner, stunning Diamond momentarily. Kirkshaw builds up a head of steam and runs at the stunned Diamond, with dreams of decapitating Diamond with a clothesline in his head quickly SHATTERED by Diamond who catches the young Kirkshaw with an UNBREAKABLE FACEBREAKER! Diamond drops to a knee and picks up the microphone that Kirkshaw once held, and he begins to speak...slowly.
Diamond: This...this right here, is what happens when somebody tries to make an example out of Joseph Diamond. Hey, Kirk, why don’t you tell everybody how you feel right now?
Diamond holds the microphone up to Kirkshaw’s mouth but all that can be heard is a low groan of “Nooo”.
Diamond: That really tells the whole story. Gabriel Kirkman tried to do what so many others have tried. Make an example out of me. Jack Rogue tried. I drove that kid out of his mind I beat him so bad. Bill Bronson tried. He had to retire after our match at WrestleDynasty. Our current world champion, Mike Thunder, he tried but I DESTROYED him. I put him away in under 10 minutes. And these are esteemed, big names. Gabriel Kirkman? His only accomplishment is being one half of the team that beat...who, exactly? He wouldn’t of been on my radar had he not put me through a table last week. And look at him now. As I sit here before you, he is quite literally at my feet. I could’ve gotten about 30 pinfalls in the time I’ve been talking. So Gabriel Kirkman, you’ve got your match, I’d get your whole….situation sorted out, because, to be frank, I’m going to show you exactly why for two months I was on everybody’s radar as the man who nobody could beat. Because I’m going to beat you and leave you asking for Anarchy Inc. to come and send me home. But they won’t be able to. Because they’re just like you. Weak. Inexperienced. They don’t know what it means to face Joseph Diamond. I am the diamond standard for excellence and when I say I was screwed out of a match it’s not because I’m trying to cover my tracks. It’s because I was. I never speak a word out of line with reality and the reality of this situation is that you aren’t in my league. You’ll soon learn why Diamond...is forever.
Diamond lets the microphone roll out of his fingers as he gets off his knee and goes to walk out of the ring, Diamonds from Sierra Leone again fills the arena, and as as he walks up the ramp, Diamond yells “You’re not on my level, Kirk!” to a loud ovation from the audience. However, something he didn’t expect was for Kirkshaw to grab the microphone in the ring and to somehow haul himself up to the second rope, using it for leverage as he glared at his new enemy. Diamond sees Kirkshaw wriggling and stops at the top of the ramp.
Kirkshaw: Hey...Joey-boy...listen, and listen close. *pant, pant* You may have left me lying, but you haven’t beaten me yet. I may be the lesser-experienced ‘tween us, that’s certainly for sure...but I’m still getting back up. One facebreaker ain’t going to keep me down. Hell, I don’t need Anarchy, Inc.’s help to kick your ass. I’ll see you tonight...and I can’t wait. Can’t wait to leave you...like Jack Rogue left your brother.
Diamond’s eyes widen, he mouths “YOU MOTHERFUCKER”, and he begins to storm back to the ring, but before he can reach he’s met by officials who hold Diamond back as Kirkshaw smirks a bloody, devillish grin, sprawled out over the bottom rope. Diamond fights the referees, even knocking one out before he’s escorted to the back by no less than a dozen officials as the segment ends.
@CiV --thank you for helping co-write this!
Kirkshaw: Awwh, c’mon Glasgow! You shouldn’t be surprised! I mean, who’s to say that if I didn’t do it, that no one else would’ve come out here and shut his pathetic, whiny mouth?
His insult resulted in a mixture of “boos” and “You suck!” chants.
Kirkshaw: I suck? I suck--hey, jerkasses, I’m not the one who was out here talking smack last week. It was terrible listening to Diamond’s childish rants-- "Aw, but a ref screwed me! He didn’t see my leg under the bottom rope! I should’ve gotten the 1-2-3!" ...keep up the talk, Diamond, but as much as you bitch, as much as you may whine, you are the one causing crap backstage. You are the one taking time out in the limelight while others--such as myself, one-half of your prestigious tag team champions--
He holds up the belt that he’s referring to before continuing...
Kirkshaw: --are looking for mere minutes of your TV time. Your time out here is up--!
Right as Kirkshaw’s rambling was about to reach it’s climax, the horns of Diamonds from Sierra Leone echo around the *insert arena here*, and after 20 seconds of strobe lights and pyrotechnics, Joseph Diamond emerges from the back, sunglass on eye and microphone in hand. He doesn’t look especially thrilled with Kirkshaw.
Diamond: I’m sorry to interrupt your coming out party, I really am, Kirk. But you just said something that, well, it doesn’t sit right with me. You called yourself one half of the tag team champions, and you act as though that should bring you some sort of esteem, some elevation over the roster, but all that belt shows is that you couldn’t get it done on your own. You say my time is up, but that’s absurd. I’m just getting started and if you, or any of the other little kids in the back think that you can replace me, think that you can make a name for yourself against ME? The Longest. Reigning. Intercontinental Champion in HISTORY? A man, who went undefeated for two months before he was SCREWED at WrestleDynasty? Maybe you should drop wrestling and become a stand up comic.
Before replying to Diamond, Kirkshaw glares into the hard camera, yelling into his mic...
Kirkshaw: All right, that’s it! Cut his mic! Cut it!
...before turning back to face the former Intercontinental Champion, angrily glaring a hole right through him as he slowly paces towards him across the ring.
Kirkshaw: Let’s get one thing straight, Joey. That’s right, you were Intercontinental Champion. Key word being were. Thing is, currently in this ring, there’s only one man carrying a belt between the two of us.
At this point, despite having no mic, Diamond could clearly be heard quipping right back at the tag champion.
Diamond: Well, obviously. I’m on the ramp, you idiot!
Kirkshaw: Yeah, that’s right! Because you have no guts to tie your laces and climb up into this ring with a champion such as myself. Let’s get one thing straight, Diamond, you claim to be just as unbreakable as your namesake? Mere delusion, I say. You may think you’re unbreakable, but I don’t have to break you to beat you. If you think otherwise, why don’t you prove it tough guy? Right here and now!
Diamond whips the sunglasses off of his face then storms the ring and is greeted by clubbing blows from Kirkshaw, but those aren’t enough to keep Diamond down, who takes out the legs of Kirkshaw and starts WAILING on the tag team champion, Kirkshaw is able to catch Diamond with a rake to the eye and retreat to the corner, stunning Diamond momentarily. Kirkshaw builds up a head of steam and runs at the stunned Diamond, with dreams of decapitating Diamond with a clothesline in his head quickly SHATTERED by Diamond who catches the young Kirkshaw with an UNBREAKABLE FACEBREAKER! Diamond drops to a knee and picks up the microphone that Kirkshaw once held, and he begins to speak...slowly.
Diamond: This...this right here, is what happens when somebody tries to make an example out of Joseph Diamond. Hey, Kirk, why don’t you tell everybody how you feel right now?
Diamond holds the microphone up to Kirkshaw’s mouth but all that can be heard is a low groan of “Nooo”.
Diamond: That really tells the whole story. Gabriel Kirkman tried to do what so many others have tried. Make an example out of me. Jack Rogue tried. I drove that kid out of his mind I beat him so bad. Bill Bronson tried. He had to retire after our match at WrestleDynasty. Our current world champion, Mike Thunder, he tried but I DESTROYED him. I put him away in under 10 minutes. And these are esteemed, big names. Gabriel Kirkman? His only accomplishment is being one half of the team that beat...who, exactly? He wouldn’t of been on my radar had he not put me through a table last week. And look at him now. As I sit here before you, he is quite literally at my feet. I could’ve gotten about 30 pinfalls in the time I’ve been talking. So Gabriel Kirkman, you’ve got your match, I’d get your whole….situation sorted out, because, to be frank, I’m going to show you exactly why for two months I was on everybody’s radar as the man who nobody could beat. Because I’m going to beat you and leave you asking for Anarchy Inc. to come and send me home. But they won’t be able to. Because they’re just like you. Weak. Inexperienced. They don’t know what it means to face Joseph Diamond. I am the diamond standard for excellence and when I say I was screwed out of a match it’s not because I’m trying to cover my tracks. It’s because I was. I never speak a word out of line with reality and the reality of this situation is that you aren’t in my league. You’ll soon learn why Diamond...is forever.
Diamond lets the microphone roll out of his fingers as he gets off his knee and goes to walk out of the ring, Diamonds from Sierra Leone again fills the arena, and as as he walks up the ramp, Diamond yells “You’re not on my level, Kirk!” to a loud ovation from the audience. However, something he didn’t expect was for Kirkshaw to grab the microphone in the ring and to somehow haul himself up to the second rope, using it for leverage as he glared at his new enemy. Diamond sees Kirkshaw wriggling and stops at the top of the ramp.
Kirkshaw: Hey...Joey-boy...listen, and listen close. *pant, pant* You may have left me lying, but you haven’t beaten me yet. I may be the lesser-experienced ‘tween us, that’s certainly for sure...but I’m still getting back up. One facebreaker ain’t going to keep me down. Hell, I don’t need Anarchy, Inc.’s help to kick your ass. I’ll see you tonight...and I can’t wait. Can’t wait to leave you...like Jack Rogue left your brother.
Diamond’s eyes widen, he mouths “YOU MOTHERFUCKER”, and he begins to storm back to the ring, but before he can reach he’s met by officials who hold Diamond back as Kirkshaw smirks a bloody, devillish grin, sprawled out over the bottom rope. Diamond fights the referees, even knocking one out before he’s escorted to the back by no less than a dozen officials as the segment ends.
@CiV --thank you for helping co-write this!
