Last Wrestling Match Watched 2.0

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - King of the Ring Semifinals: Brock Lesnar (w/Paul Heyman) vs. Test

An odd choice for the Semi-Final given neither man is a fan-favourite here, not to mention this is Lesnar's first WWE match with another “Big Man” opponent. lockup battle to start, Brock hammers away, but runs into an elbow. Test clotheslines him a couple of times, but misses the big boot, and Brock bails. Back in, Test slugs away Things get pretty sloppy, and Test has to lead Brock into a sideslam sequence so they can reset. Test hits the Full Nelson slam for two, but Brock slips out of the Pump-Handle Slam. Test hits it on a second try, but it only gets two. The fans were buying the upset. Big Boot! ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Heyman (and the crowd) nearly has a heart attack. Heyman distracts Test to break up another Big Boot. That allows Lesnar to finish with the F5. Not good. *

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - Cruiserweight Title: The Hurricane vs. Jamie Noble (w/Nidia)

For all the good build going into this match (and the Cruiserweight division in general at this time), I just find it a real effort to care. Jamie Noble and his Trailer Trash gimmick really does it for me, but i couldn't give a shit about Helms. Other then his mini Feud with Rock in 2003. hey fight over a lockup and Helms poses to stress his superiority. Rollup gets two. They work the mat for a bit, and Noble pounds away in the corner. Helms with a Shining Wizard-like kick to the head, and a superkick gets two. He grabs a headscissors while the crowd chants “She’s a crack whore” at Nidia. Hurricane reverses a suplex and Nidia misses tripping him up (how do you blow THAT spot?), but when Hurricane chases he gets ambushed. Noble gets two. Noble whips him around and chokes away. Snap suplex gets two. Abdominal stretch into a backdrop suplex gets two. Hurricane comes back with a bodyblock for two. Noble blocks a victory roll with an electric chair for two. He grabs a submission hold, but Hurricane comes back with an Edge-o-Matic for two. Sleeper is reversed to a jawbreaker and reversed. This sudden sleeper revival is starting to bother me. Slugfest and Helms gets a neckbreaker and a clothesline. Buff Blockbuster gets two. Eye of the Hurricane is reversed to a german for two. Eye of the Hurricane gets two on the second go. He goes for the cape, but that villainous nemesis, Nidia, steals it, so Hurricane suplexes her cohort onto the floor and follows with a cross-body to the floor. Hey, a highspot, about time. Noble baseball slides him, however, and they head up top back in the ring. Hurricane wins that battle with a swinging neckbreaker off the top! SWANK~! Noble is, shockingly, still breathing, and Nidia distracts the ref. The heels collide and Helms gets the elusive chokeslam, for two. Back up, but Noble crotches him and finishes with a powerbomb. I'm shocked that they gave them this much time. It was a very WWE match, though, based on gimmicks and wacky storylines. **1/2

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - Eddie Guerrero vs. Ric Flair

Eddie was in FULL BLOWN WCW sleaze mode. Eddie’s pre-match promo, where he goes over his entire family (including some kid they picked up in the street the other night) is a thing of beauty. Eddie overpowers him to start and offers a Whoo and a half-hearted strut. Well, that’s just sacrilege. Dropkick off a criss-cross and Flair bails. Back in, Flair starts chopping, and Eddie bails. Back in, Eddie hammers away, and Flair returns fire as only he can – by going low. Cheat to win indeed. More chops send Eddie scurrying again. Back in, Eddie grabs a facelock, but gets powered into a suplex. Eddie goes after the knee, but Flair reverses a figure-four attempt for two. Eddie keeps on it and posts him, and stays on the knee. Figure-four (on the wrong leg as usual) gets two. Flair makes the ropes. Eddie beats him down in the corner and necksnaps him, but Flair is still game for a chopfest. Eddie hits the chinlock. Flair escapes and starts up with the chops again, and Eddie gets dumped. Back in, Eddy gets a suplex to set up the frog splash, but it misses. And now Flair goes to the knee, but Benoit joins us. Flair chops away, but Eddie rolls him up for two. Backslide gets two, and Flair isn’t even up to doing the rest of the sequence these days. That’s just sad. Flair walks into an elbow, and Eddie gets a tornado DDT for two. Benoit helpfully stretches out Flair’s stiff neck on the outside with a complex massage technique that might be mistaken by laymen for the Crossface. But this distraction allows Bubba Dudley to run in from the crowd, hit a BubbaBomb on Eddei, and Flair gets the pin. This REALLY did not need all the interference. I realize that they wanted to set up Bubba against Eddie & Benoit at Vengeance, but there are other ways to do that besides screwing up a perfectly good match. **3/4 - ***

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - WWF Women's Title: Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly

Jim Ross notes that it's illegal to sell a thong to a man in Oklahoma. I find it disturbing that he'd know that. Molly attacks for two. Trish comes back with a bicycle kick, but walks into a backdrop for two. Molly grabs a Herb Kunze armbar and works on it, but Trish rolls her over for two. Molly pounds her down again, but Trish steps up into a victory roll for two. Neckbreaker gets two. Reverse rollup gets two. Molly drops her on the bottom rope to regain the upper hand and chokes away. Trish bails and falls victim to the Power of Molly on the outside, landing in the front row. Trish is turning into quite the little bump freak. Back in, Trish gives her a Kawada kick off the apron, but Molly goes up. Trish follows with the headscissor takedown to bring her back down, and chops away. CANADIAN VIOLENCE~! Lariat and dropkick for Trish, but Molly gets a jawbreaker. Trish comes back with another Kawada Kick, but Molly blocks the bulldog with a german suplex for two. Molly drops her on her head and heads up for the Molly Go Round, but it misses. Trish rollup is reversed for the pin and the title. This was some fine women’s wrestling packed into 5 minutes. **1/2

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - Hulk Hogan vs. Kurt Angle

Speaking of the video package that precedes this, what the heck ever happened to that “Hogan just wants to retire” angle, anyway? That lasted, what, a week? Angle still has his Buddy Roberts amateur headgear and wig on. See, he didn't want anyone else seeing that he was bald. Hogan wins his traditional lockup battle and goes to a headlock. That turns into a thrilling wristlock sequence and Hogan sends Angle running. Back in, Angle pounds away and gets a clothesline that knocks the bandana right off Hogan’s head. Angle gets dumped again. They brawl and of course Hogan wins that because otherwise people might think it was unrealistic or something. Back in, Angle meets the turnbuckles a bunch of times and Hogan uses the WINDMILL PUNCH OF DOOM to put Angle down. Kurt comes back with a low blow, thus earning the match * automatically. I’m willing to go as high as ***** if the ballshots to Hogan keep up. Angle lays in the chops and gets a backdrop suplex, which is one of the few bumps Hogan can take. He gets another one, for the same reason. That gets two. Hogan blocks a suplex and gets his own, and uses the BODYSLAM OF DEATH to come back. Kurt grabs a sleeper and that turns into a resthold situation rather quickly. Hogan finally reverses, but gets suplexed again. Angle Slam gets two. Hogan does a delayed Hulk-up. Punch punch punch boot, but he stalls rather than using the legdrop. He instead chooses to go after the wig, and Angle is so discombobulated that he bails and takes a walk. We’re all thinking countout win for Hogan, but Angle returns with a chair, takes a swing, and hits himself instead. What a badass. Big boot, but the legdrop misses and Angle slaps on the anklelock! GO KURT! Hogan almost makes the ropes, but Kurt keeps pulling him back and reapplying, and Hogan finally does the right thing and taps to the better man. Hogan tapping was pretty shocking for the time. **1/4

[video=youtube;wSPLaWDe62M]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSPLaWDe62M[/video]

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - King of the Ring Finals: Brock Lesnar (w/Paul Heyman) vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD hammers away to start and goes for the knee, then gets a superkick. Monkeyflip is blocked with a powerbomb. Brock stomps away and tosses him around the ring. Powerslam gets two. Backbreaker sets up a bearhug. Brock keeps pounding in the corner, but misses a charge and hits the post. Rob goes back to the knee and gets a spinkick, and a missile dropkick. Brock catches him with a powerbomb, though, and spends the next few minutes feasting on Van Dam's jugular. Lesnar misses a charge and posts his shoulder, so Rob Van Dam, Super Gee-nee-uss, goes back to the legs. Van Dam hits the Five-Star Frogsplash, but Heyman snaps his throat on the top rope. It nearly backfires as Van Dam lands on Lesnar for two. Van Dam comes off the top, but Brock catches him in mid-air and finishes with the F5. *1/2

 

[Crippler]

WWE King of the Ring 2002 - Undisputed Heavyweight Title: The Undertaker vs. Triple H

Paul Heyman joins the commentary table as a representative of Brock because he's got next. The crowd is hot during the intros, but after three minutes of "action," they're dead. That should tell you something about the quality of the match. Slugfest to start, won by UT. Then HHH. Then UT. HHH comes back with the Voodoo Choke, but UT pulls him out and slugs away again. They keep punching each other on the floor. I guess this is what JR meant by “more old school” in his Ross Report. Okay, we’ve established the punch quite well for both guys now. Back in, Taker (you guessed it) keeps punching. HHH punches back. Taker hotshots him to escape all the punching, and mixes it up with a clothesline for two. That’s enough mixing it up, he says, and goes back to punching. And hey, how about another punch for two? HHH punches back again, but walks into a sideslam for two. Well, at least it’s not a punch. Taker chokes away as JR starts spin-doctoring the non-action with his “Well, this isn’t catch-as-catch-can…” speech. Taker whips him around, but walks into an elbow. And guess what’s next? PUNCHING! There’s a kick from UT for two. JR uses the old “deliberate methodical pace” line to say that it’s boring as fuck. On the floor, HHH suplexes him and both guys lay around for a bit. Back in, UT clotheslines him and drops the leg for two. They head to the top rope – very slowly – and Taker’s superplex attempt is blocked. What a highspot. HHH – that’s right – keeps punching. Taker clotheslines him for two. This match is slower than a French art film. Taker undoes the turnbuckle, but HHH keeps punching. Taker clotheslines him and they stand around again. I check to ensure that my stopwatch has not, in fact, run out of batteries. You know it’s a bad match when you check your watch, but you know it’s a truly horrible match when you check to make sure it’s still working. HHH with the neckbreaker and he punches and gets a sad spinebuster for two. More punching. Taker gives him Snake Eyes on the exposed turnbuckle, but HHH no-sells and gets the high knee for two, and then does the AJPW delayed sell. But not for long. Taker DDTs him for two. Taker punches away, HHH punches back, but the ref gets bumped , twice. Double KO and everyone is selling it like death, even though there’s been like 3 minutes total of contact so far. Rock does a walk-in, complete with music, but is only there to do commentary. . Taker and HHH lay around FOREVER and UT grabs a chair, but can’t use it. Taker gets dumped and they brawl, and SHOCKINGLY Rock gets nailed by mistake, and then even more shockingly goes after UT and hits HHH by mistake. Back in, Hebner is still unconscious, so the Last Ride only gets two, courtesy of Nick Patrick. Patrick gets bumped, too. Rock interjects himself and beats on Taker with a Rock Bottom, and HHH gets two from that after they lay around for 20 minutes to sell all the action we’ve seen. More laying around substitutes for actual drama. What have they actually DONE to justify all this selling? KICK WHAM PEDIGREE gets nothing because Earl is still out. UT goes low and gets a rollup for the pin. After the match, Taker talks trash to the Rock and takes a Rock Bottom. Helmsley jumps the Rock and gives him the Pedigree, but the Undertaker recovers and chokeslams Helmsley. This started out sucking and almost, sorta, kinda threatened to get interesting before the booking kicked in. *

 

[Crippler]

WWE Smackdown 03/03/2006: World Heavyweight Championship - Kurt Angle vs Undertaker

This is the rematch from No Way Out due to the controversial finish. I still don’t know how the WWE can call that finish controversial. Champ enters first, i'n not a fan when that happens. Crowd goes into the dueling chants to start as Angle tries to avoid being stuck in the corner with Taker. Angle ducks Taker’s shots and turns things around on Taker in the corner. Taker comes out and brings Angle into the corner by his throat and delivers some body shots. Taker chases the ref out of the ring and charges into a boot off a whip in the corner. Angle catches Taker in an armdrag and goes into an armbar. Taker escapes and applies a Fujiwara armbar of his own. Taker lifts Angle up in a knucklelock lift and heads over to the corner to wrench on Angle’s arm some more. Taker decides to go OLD SKOOL, but Angle brings him down with a forearm. Angle stomps Taker down in the corner, but Taker goes back to the arm to regain control. Taker looks like he wants to try for OLD SKOOL again, but Angle drills him with a forearm before he can start the climb. Angle delivers the ten-count corner punch, but Taker lifts him up for the LAST RIDE to counter after seven. Angle tries to block it, so Taker drops him on the top rope instead. Angle gets booted off the apron into the security wall as we go to break. We come back to see Taker setting up the announce table, but Angle stops him and slams Taker’s head into the steel steps, but then he turns around and drops Angle with a clothesline. Taker places Angle on the apron and gives him the guillotine leg drop across the neck instead of delivering it on the chest. Angle WRITHES in pain as he falls to the floor. Taker brings Angle back in to avoid a countout and covers for 1-2-NO! I love how Taker created the opportunity to move from working on the arm to the neck. Taker grinds and hammers on Angle’s neck and shoulders, but then Angle reverses a whip and hits a powerslam out of nowhere! Cover, 1-2-NO! Angle applies a chinlock, but releases the hold when Taker starts pushing on Angle’s face causing more torque on the neck. Angle delivers a suplex for two, and then moves to a body scissors for a few near-falls. Taker stands up out of it, leaving Angle open for right hands. Angle baits Taker in the corner and avoids a running big boot to create an opportunity to weaken Taker’s leg for the anklelock. Angle tries to knock Taker off the apron, but he runs into a back elbow to slow things down. Taker heads up top, but Angle meets him there only to get knocked back down. Angle comes back with rights and delivers a top-rope superplex for 1-2-NO! Commercial break #2! After the break, we see Angle punishing Taker with another chinlock. Taker punches out, but then gets clotheslined out to the floor by Angle. He lands on his feet and pulls Angle out to the floor with him. That proves to a BIG mistake, as Angle reverses a whip sending Taker knees-first into the steel steps! Back in, Angle covers for 1-2-NO! Taker wins a slugfest and follows Angle into the corner with a clothesline! Make it two clotheslines! Taker follows up with the snake-eyes, but Angle ducks the big boot and hits a German Suplex! OH YEAH! Angle wants the ANGLE SLAM, but will he get it? NO! Big boot by Taker! Cover, 1-2-NO! Taker wants a CHOKESLAM, but Angle decides that the ANKLELOCK might be that much cooler! Taker kicks Angle away and goes for the TOMBSTONE out of nowhere! Angle reverses, but so does Taker! Angle escapes, ducks a clothesline and hits the ANGLE SLAM! Cover, 1-2-NO!!! The crowd collectively has a heart attack at this point. Angle pulls down the straps, makes up some new cuss words, and slaps on the ANKLELOCK again! Taker rolls through it and catches Angle in a CHOKESLAM! Taker staggers around, so Angle takes advantage and surprises EVERYONE with another ANKLELOCK! Taker turns around and pulls Angle into the Triangle Choke! Angle starts to fade away, but then rolls over Taker into a pinning predicament just like at No Way Out, but Taker slips out after one. The choke is still applied as Taker rolls onto his back. Will Angle tap out?! Angle’s arm drops once, twice, but not three times as he reaches the bottom rope. Taker sets Angle up for a leg drop, but Angle avoids it and hooks on the ANKLELOCK for the FOURTH time in this match! Taker actually kicks Angle off again, slips out of an ANGLE SLAM, and applies a Dragon Sleeper! Angle pounds his way out of it and drops Taker with a DDT for 1-2-NO! Angle goes for it all with a picture-perfect MOONSAULT, but there’s no water in the pool! ZOMBIE SIT-UP! Taker hits the TOMBSTONE and just as he covers Angle, Mark Henry and Daivari hop in the ring and begin their attack for the DQ. Post-Match Henry drags Taker to the announce table and frogsplashes him through the table. This was equally as good as the No Way Out match as they had something to build from and busted out even more moves. It was nearing ****¾ territory in my eyes up until that DQ finish to set up Henry/Taker for WM damn this should of been the MAIN EVENT WM22. ****1/2

 

[Chriss]

Brock Lesnar vs John Cena - Extreme Rules 2012

 

[Chriss]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Santino Marella vs The Miz

 

[Andrew]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Daniel Bryan vs. Jerry Lawler

 

[Chriss]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Chris Jericho vs The Big Show

 

[Chriss]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Brodus Clay vs JTG

 

[Chriss]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Randy Orton vs Jack Swagger

 

[Chriss]

WWE Raw - 4/30/2012 Epico & Primo vs Kofi Kingston & R-Truth