Yeah, so last night my gf had a couple of friends over for supper and since she recently fucked up kraft dinner (true story) it was left up to yours truly to prepare supper so I bang out my best dish and throw down an amazing meal.
Her two friends arrive. We'll call them fatty and queermo. Fatty is a mid thirties girl with giant knockers who could be really cute if she could find her way to a treadmill. Queermo is her cousin who is one of those sensitive homos. Everything seems to offend this guy. He once met some of my friends and my buddy Casey who is gay was even like 'What the fuck is this fags problem?'
Anyway, so we're eating and everyone is enjoying the meal (damn right) and my gf's cat starts being really annoying. Meowing for attention and trying to jump up on people's laps. Except fatty of course because there is no room on her lap. After 10 minutes of this though I'm getting pissed off so I yell at the cat 'Shut up Tegro!'
Queermo looks at me and asks me and asks why I called the cat Tegro when it's name is Tigger.
So I tell him that Tigger is her slave name and I don't want to be offensive so I call her Tegro. He gets all red in the face like he just started choking on a huge load and tells me 'That was one of the most racist comments I have ever heard.'
Now at this point I have to admit something kinda shameful. My gf isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer. She's very nice and I love her very much but to say that we have some very interesting, in-depth conversations would be an outright lie.
(Side story, we got in a discussion about ethnicity because I said my ethnicity was Italian-Canadian, and she disagreed because I wasn't from Italy so I was just Canadian. I asked her then what made her French-Canadian seeing as she wasn't from France and she replied that it was because she spoke French. In response I asked her if I spoke Japanese if that would make me a Japanese-Canadian to which she said yes.)
Anyway, her friends are not much better. Not very bright at all. They're government employees, what do you expect? So I asked him how my comment was racist and it was because I compared using the word Tigger to using Nope or some shit like that. I wasn't really listening.
So after this dinner goes on in relative silence as we all eat. I say relative silence because I can still hear fatty snarfing down her meal. After dinner my gf asks who wants dessert and I'm all like nope, going upstairs to play some video games meow. At which point queermo some how construes my use of meow as me trying to belittle him and his opinions of my racism. So for once I just bite my tongue and head off upstairs to blissful silence.
About an hour or so later they're taking off to go home and my gf comes upstairs and tells me to come down and see them off because it's good manners. So fatty and queermo are standing at the door with it open saying good bye to my lady and I'm all like, I don't mind if you have the door open, just make sure Tegro doesn't get out. Queermo looks at me all pissy and says goodbye to my gf and thanks her for the meal and says nothing to me. Fatty on the other hand I thought might have laughed but I'm not sure it could've been gas from over eating too.
Her two friends arrive. We'll call them fatty and queermo. Fatty is a mid thirties girl with giant knockers who could be really cute if she could find her way to a treadmill. Queermo is her cousin who is one of those sensitive homos. Everything seems to offend this guy. He once met some of my friends and my buddy Casey who is gay was even like 'What the fuck is this fags problem?'
Anyway, so we're eating and everyone is enjoying the meal (damn right) and my gf's cat starts being really annoying. Meowing for attention and trying to jump up on people's laps. Except fatty of course because there is no room on her lap. After 10 minutes of this though I'm getting pissed off so I yell at the cat 'Shut up Tegro!'
Queermo looks at me and asks me and asks why I called the cat Tegro when it's name is Tigger.
So I tell him that Tigger is her slave name and I don't want to be offensive so I call her Tegro. He gets all red in the face like he just started choking on a huge load and tells me 'That was one of the most racist comments I have ever heard.'
Now at this point I have to admit something kinda shameful. My gf isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer. She's very nice and I love her very much but to say that we have some very interesting, in-depth conversations would be an outright lie.
(Side story, we got in a discussion about ethnicity because I said my ethnicity was Italian-Canadian, and she disagreed because I wasn't from Italy so I was just Canadian. I asked her then what made her French-Canadian seeing as she wasn't from France and she replied that it was because she spoke French. In response I asked her if I spoke Japanese if that would make me a Japanese-Canadian to which she said yes.)
Anyway, her friends are not much better. Not very bright at all. They're government employees, what do you expect? So I asked him how my comment was racist and it was because I compared using the word Tigger to using Nope or some shit like that. I wasn't really listening.
So after this dinner goes on in relative silence as we all eat. I say relative silence because I can still hear fatty snarfing down her meal. After dinner my gf asks who wants dessert and I'm all like nope, going upstairs to play some video games meow. At which point queermo some how construes my use of meow as me trying to belittle him and his opinions of my racism. So for once I just bite my tongue and head off upstairs to blissful silence.
About an hour or so later they're taking off to go home and my gf comes upstairs and tells me to come down and see them off because it's good manners. So fatty and queermo are standing at the door with it open saying good bye to my lady and I'm all like, I don't mind if you have the door open, just make sure Tegro doesn't get out. Queermo looks at me all pissy and says goodbye to my gf and thanks her for the meal and says nothing to me. Fatty on the other hand I thought might have laughed but I'm not sure it could've been gas from over eating too.
Pshhh. Historical Guilt. But that's another conversation.