My Dad did used to have his funny speeches and used to use me for this weird life lessons "Boys - Julian - knows how to shoot and she knows how to fight better than anyone else in this house (I think I was 16 or 17) so they were like (21 and 19) - so please don't embarrass me by singing at the top of your voices when you come home drunk and singing like idiots at 4am." And afterwards I used to ask my dad afterwards what me fighting had to do with anything - and he used to say 'Balls Darling - Big Fucking Metaphorical Balls" - i grew up with strange lessons and stories, which im pretty sure he was just making up the whole time
