WWF Sunday Night HeAt
8.15.99 | Bradley Center
HeAt began with
Jim Ross welcoming the new #1 contender for Stone Cold’s WWF Championship at SummerSlam -
Chyna! Ross describes her eventful night this past Monday that concluded with Austin himself hitting Triple H with a steel chair and Chyna getting the upset win. “The Ninth Wonder of the World” doesn’t see it the same way, she’s earned her title shot after all her hard work this year - from being the first woman to compete in the Royal Rumble to the first woman to qualify for the King of the Ring. Chyna emphatically says she’ll rip “the head” off the rattlesnake with her bare hands if that means becoming the first woman to be WWF Champion!
Walking down a backstage corridor,
Michael Hayes tries to talk some sense into
The Hardyz after they seemingly sided with Gangrel on RAW, but they give him the cold-shoulder the entire way. Hayes is persistent in his ways until The Hardyz ultimately demand him to stay in the back for their match, leaving Hayes to contemplate his future with the duo as they brush past.
Tag Team Match | The Hardy Boyz vs. Kaientai
The Hardy Boyz show their new found aggression by attacking Kaientai during their entrance and trouncing them all the way down the ramp and along ringside. The beating eventually moved into the ring and The Hardy Boyz began to showcase their fast paced teamwork that got them noticed by Michael Hayes to begin with, but tonight, instead,
Gangrel was the one who now looked on as he appeared at ringside with an interest in the contest. The Hardy Boyz made quick work of TAKA and Funaki and controlled from the sound of the bell, putting an end to the bout with a Twist of Fate by Matt and a Swanton Bomb by Jeff to gain the dominate victory. Gangrel goes to congratulate Matt and Jeff post match but The Hardyz unexpectedly want none of it! Out of the blue
Edge and Christian storm the ring and go after The Hardyz as payback from their attack this past RAW! The two teams brawl to the back with a couple of referees failing to keep control.
After the commercial break a recap aired of what happened during the break, with
Michael Hayes coming out to argue with
Gangrel for trying to take his “boys” - but getting an Impaler DDT on the ramp for his trouble! The cameras then quickly catch up with the live action as
Edge and Christian continue their scuffle with
The Hardyz until they ram them face first into the concrete wall of the parking lot to end their battle… for now.
In a pre-recorded video from earlier in the week,
Paul Bearer is in San Fernando Valley, California at the Local 81 (Hell’s Angels) and asks for a favor from “The Dead Man”. The bikers look Bearer up and down as he requests two bikes for a ride in the desert for The Undertaker and his new partner, The Big Show. The bikers scoff, although they know The Undertaker will be just fine, they doubt The Big Show could handle the 120 degree days in the middle of Death Valley in August. The two grizzled bikers forewarn the only things that survive in the desert are the cold-blooded...the snakes and the lizards. Bearer cackles and agrees, but still insists on both bikes. A rather interesting request was then made, in one of those bikes he wants, for The Big Show, to only have enough gas to get to the middle of the desert and not get back. The bikers look befuddled as Bearer clearly has evil intentions in mind.
A recap from last week’s HeAt saw The Blue Meanie threaten to eat Al Snow’s dog Pepper, which led to Al Snow snapping and putting Blue Meanie through a table. The offbeat
Blue Meanie was then interviewed backstage by
Terry Taylor and explained last week he was caught off guard by his delicious doggy but tonight he needs to watch out for “Da Blue Guy”! The Blue Meanie did his signature hypnotizing jig as he left with Terry Taylor struggling to hold back his lunch in disgust.
Hardcore Match | Al Snow (w/ Pepper) vs. The Blue Meanie
This was your standard 1999 hardcore match, albeit a bit more timid as the two only brawled around the ringside area. The Blue Meanie had Snow down with a DDT outside the ring and made his way toward the commentators table where Al Snow left his dog
Pepper in the hands of Michael Cole of all people. Blue Meanie licked his lips and sauntered over as if he was prepared to down this small dog like he was at Coney Island on July 4th. Just as Meanie neared Pepper, Snow saved the day and sent Meanie crashing against the guardrailing shoulder first! The crowd caused a commotion while Snow and Meanie brawled against the guardrailing just as
The Big Bossman appeared on the scene, coming off getting hit with a pet carrier this past Monday, the Hardcore Champion wildly swung his nightstick and mistakenly leveled Blue Meanie instead! Al Snow capitalized on Bossman’s error and stole the three count from “Da Blue Guy”! The Bossman wasn’t done yet and tried to get his hands on Pepper - but Snow swooped in to snatch his chihuahua in time to hightail it up the ramp to safety. Bossman took his frustrations out on Meanie instead, obliterating him once more with a stiff nightstick shot to the gut!
Backstage
Terri and
Marianna argue over who should be getting their makeup done first, Terri gives up and insults Marianna by insisting she would need it more and she’ll come back in an hour when she’s done. Before they could come to blows, Terri’s boy toy
Meat pulls her aside just as
Chaz enters the picture to calm his girlfriend down as well, with the latter heading out with his match coming up next.
Tag Team Match | Val Venis and Chaz (w/ Marianna) vs. Droz and Prince Albert
The 1-800-ATT Boot of the Week recapped last weeks attack on The Godfather at the hands of Droz and Prince Albert. The pierced-up duo pounded away until Val Venis and Chaz ran down for the save, setting up tonight’s tag team contest. Being the more polished team, Droz and Albert worked well as they isolated Val Venis and targeted his mid-section to keep him grounded. Marianna did her best to cheer on her boyfriends partner… much to the dismay of Chaz. Against all odds, Venis managed to break free of Droz and even level Albert off the ring apron to go for the hot tag - but the jealous Chaz jumped off the apron and argued with Marianna over her cheering “too loud” for Val! As the referee was preoccupied by the ringside argument,
The Godfather came down and shoved Prince Albert shoulder first into the ring post! Droz looked to get revenge for his partner until Val Venis grabbed him from behind and landed the Blue Thunder Bomb for the sudden pinfall! Chaz can’t believe it and immediately blamed the loss on Marianna, with the two arguing past The Godfather as he celebrated up the ramp - before he was laid out from behind by Droz’ dealer
Key. Making his surprising debut last month, the massive man clad in a pearl white suit and pants - and weirdly enough, long white braids, Key also leveled Venis in-ring with Albert’s steel tattoo briefcase for good measure. The trio put the boots to The Big Valbowski and stood tall in the ring despite suffering the loss.
Chris Jericho struts down the hallway, riding high after his debut this past Monday, and introduces himself to a disinterested, but severely itchy,
Mr. Ass. Jericho insist they both have something in common - and that’s being 100% sick of The Rock. Jericho rehashes Rock having a masseuse putting poison ivy on Billy’s ass during his private massage, while suggesting a “Canadian home remedy” to help aid said rash. Gunn seems suspect but can’t escape the itch and snatches Jericho’s remedy before walking off with his hands down his tights in full scratch, leaving Jericho with a wicked grin.
Singles Match | X-Pac vs. Bradshaw
Prior to the bout, Michael Cole announced the WWF Tag Team Championship rematch on RAW tomorrow night between The Acolytes and X-Pac and Kane. The two competitors came out without their partners for tonight's contest and it allowed for Bradshaw to jump X-Pac before the bell, without repercussion from the monstrous Kane. Bradshaw isn’t one for pulling his punches and used his heavy hands to keep the smaller X-Pac grounded throughout the beginning of the match. The new tag team champion didn’t back down, the lighter X-Pac used his quickness and speed to catch Bradshaw off guard by countering a clothesline with a spinning heel kick for a near fall! The crowd were behind the underdog as X-Pac’s fast feet kept Bradshaw guessing and leveled the playing field. X-Pac got too big for his britches and came off the top rope - only to be caught by Bradshaw and dumped with a Fallaway Slam! The action breaks down when
Faarooq ran down but was immediately countered by
Kane as the two went at it at ringside! Faarooq turned the tides by sending Kane knee first into the steel steps - going a step further and targeting Kane’s leg with the steel steps raised above his head! X-Pac came to the save as he blindsided Faarooq with a jumping spin kick to the stairs directly to the head of Faarooq as he came crashing down! X-Pac rushed back into the ring to avoid a countout and was nearly decapitated by a Clothesline From Hell that sent him inside out! Bradshaw made the cover for the win, but The Acolytes weren’t done as they put the boots to X-Pac after the bell. “The Big Red Machine” came back in the ring to make short work of the former champions, clearing house with fiery clotheslines to both men all the while favoring his knee. The newly crowned tag team champions stood tall as the crowd cheered on, locking eyes with their opponents tomorrow night with The Acolytes looking to regain the gold.
Chris Jericho is twirling his hair around his finger as he stood bored alongside
Terry Taylor backstage for his interview, but can you blame him, it’s Terry Taylor? Jericho mainly talked about Monday Night RAW being the biggest night in professional wrestling last week… until The Rock ruined it, before shifting his focus to tonight, stating how he’ll be absolutely
glued to the monitor for tonight’s main event. The cameras then split screen to
The Rock heading to the ring with a purpose for commentary in tonight’s main event match-up.
Singles Match | “Mr. Ass” Billy Gunn vs. Jeff Jarrett (w/ Debra)
Michael Cole awkwardly billed this match as the “Ass versus Puppies” contest, which garnered no reaction from Kevin Kelly, as he just recapped Jeff Jarrett’s attack on D’Lo Brown this past RAW when he was on location training Mark Henry to get back into shape. “Mr. Ass” kept comically scratching his backside as the two rounded the squared circle only to be overshadowed by
The Rock as he made his fashionably late entrance to the commentator’s table - but had a mic in hand. Rocky mocked Gunn for being a “desperate jabroni” and accepting a massage from the first woman who even remotely notices him. He then turned his attention to Jeff Jarrett… but insisted that nobody cared about his monkey ass, and how everyone came to see Debra’s “puppies” on full display - with Jeff Jarrett merely being a sterile dog walker. Jarrett heard enough and took his frustrations out on Mr. Ass by attacking him from behind! The two had a perfectly capable B-Show main event that got the crowd behind them as Jarrett stayed on top of Gunn for a majority of the contest, working him over and getting the crowd on his comeback. Gunn had a near fall off a powerslam. Mr. Ass was a ball of fire until he missed a big splash in the corner where he clocked himself head first and walked into a snap suplex for a two and a half! The action moved to ringside where Gunn reversed an irish whip and sent Jarrett crashing into The Rock at the commentators table! Debra then saw fit to try and unleash her puppies to distract Billy, however “Mr. Ass” countered her distraction by pulling down his tights… but they were stuck onto him! The tights are glued on!
Chris Jericho appears on stage and laughs at Gunn while holding a bottle of Elmer’s glue, all the while the official was caught ogling the puppies. Gunn rolled Double J back into the ring, but with the official distracted, The Rock gained a measure of revenge as he hit an unsuspecting Gunn with a Rock Bottom! However, the referee was locked in on Debra’s puppies long enough for Rock to land a Rock Bottom on Jeff Jarrett too! The Rock stormed out of the ring as he and Jericho traded barbs, meanwhile, Mr. Ass managed to muster enough energy to drape an arm on Jarrett and pickup the win. HeAt comes to an end with Jericho backing down from Rock’s advances - but catching him with his back turned long enough to lay him out on the ramp!
Who The Hell Was That?
Meat: THE Shawn Stasiak. He went on to be a Mr. Perfect rip-off in WCW, then member of the Natural Born Thrillers, and finally an insane moron during his WWE run as “Planet Stasiak”.
Key: Vic Grimes, Droz’s drug dealer during his very short WWF stint. Also got thrown off a fucking scaffolding by crazy ass New Jack.
Chaz and Marianna: One was former Headbanger Mosh, and less formerly Beaver Cleavage, and the other was Mrs. Cleavage but now currently Chaz’s on-screen girlfriend.
Pepper: A chihuahua that Al Snow brought to the ring after he got rid of Head. Big Bossman then crafted a special meal for Al Snow and the rest was history!
