Colin White: IWF's Living Abortion

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This strange story begins 20 some odd years ago when Colin's dad met Colin's mother. Both were working in as circles as freakshow exhibits, his father, the Dog Faced Boy, his mother, the Bearded Woman. It was love at first sight on that fateful spring day. His Mother was shaving and caught a glimpse of his Father fucking an empty tuna can and she knew that one day, he would father her child.

His Mother used her bearded, womanly charms to seduce his Father. Things were great for the couple until 3 months later, his Mother found out she was pregnant. Frantic, she went to Chuckles' The Clown's Traveling Abortion Clinic where things went horribly wrong. As she laid on the hood of the 1972 El Camino, a clown plunging a rusty clothes hanger into HER bearded lady, when, on the end of the hanger, she saw her son. He refused to die at the hands of the clown so his mother decided to keep him.

He was promoted on the circuit as the Living Abortion, making gobs of money for the circus company until his parents decided to leave the circus when he was 13. After endless teasing because of his freakshow parents and the hole in the top of his head, he decided to drop out of school to spend his time with his true loves, the only things that didn't judge or despise him, weed and WoW.

With the two Ws on his side, he knew the world was his. He smoked joint after joint, garbage bag after garbage bag as he took the world of Azeroth for his own. First, he completed the Burning Crusade, then he slayed the vicious Lytch King, now, as he waits for Cataclysm, he's grown bored or Warcraft. He has the maximum amount of 80lvl characters of all types. His gold is capped on all accounts, his friends are starting to take time off letting teh newbzzzzzzz invade his favorite servers and guilds. He's decided to venture into the world outside of WoW, online message boards. Having never developed social skills outside of biting, spiting, and farting, the transition has been tough for him, but, with our help, he can do it.
 

Colin Gimp

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This strange story begins 20 some odd years ago when Colin's dad met Colin's mother. Both were working in as circles as freakshow exhibits, his father, the Dog Faced Boy, his mother, the Bearded Woman. It was love at first sight on that fateful spring day. His Mother was shaving and caught a glimpse of his Father fucking an empty tuna can and she knew that one day, he would father her child.

His Mother used her bearded, womanly charms to seduce his Father. Things were great for the couple until 3 months later, his Mother found out she was pregnant. Frantic, she went to Chuckles' The Clown's Traveling Abortion Clinic where things went horribly wrong. As she laid on the hood of the 1972 El Camino, a clown plunging a rusty clothes hanger into HER bearded lady, when, on the end of the hanger, she saw her son. He refused to die at the hands of the clown so his mother decided to keep him.

He was promoted on the circuit as the Living Abortion, making gobs of money for the circus company until his parents decided to leave the circus when he was 13. After endless teasing because of his freakshow parents and the hole in the top of his head, he decided to drop out of school to spend his time with his true loves, the only things that didn't judge or despise him, weed and WoW.

With the two Ws on his side, he knew the world was his. He smoked joint after joint, garbage bag after garbage bag as he took the world of Azeroth for his own. First, he completed the Burning Crusade, then he slayed the vicious Lytch King, now, as he waits for Cataclysm, he's grown bored or Warcraft. He has the maximum amount of 80lvl characters of all types. His gold is capped on all accounts, his friends are starting to take time off letting teh newbzzzzzzz invade his favorite servers and guilds. He's decided to venture into the world outside of WoW, online message boards. Having never developed social skills outside of biting, spiting, and farting, the transition has been tough for him, but, with our help, he can do it.

tl;dr

isn't the first thread made about me won't be the last
 

Colin Gimp

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ok so like you asked your cockgobblers what they know about me, you "wikipedia'd" all your knowledge of wow and then write a story about how i'm socially dysfunctional. Am i following you here or do i just don't get it.
 
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ok so like you asked your cockgobblers what they know about me, you "wikipedia'd" all your knowledge of wow and then make up a story about how i'm socially dysfunctional. Am i following you here or do i just don't get it

I made up nothing. That story is 100% fact.
 

Colin Gimp

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lol you kids are pathetic. You only know what i've told you how can you use that against me? You don't know shit about me and i'm not justifying my life or even halfassing responding to some fucking loser who made a story about what i told them. Lol? I'm laughing at the hilarity that you believe that's how i lived my life, it only reflects what kind of fucking empty shell you call your life.

oh and I played the beta for fucking wow and then I played it for two months up to February . Justifying myself is so beneath me . It's fucking cold in winter in Canada, and even though i was a fat kid, my life was great I wouldn't rewind anything. What does it say to the people who attack someone's life on the internet? You made up a story of me to further your claim you got publishers on your ass, my life is in order i'ma attack the basement dwellers. Bullshit you write magna and erotic fanfiction