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As the old cliché’ goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and in this case that statement can apply to both the author and the readers, but I can only speak for the author being that he and I are one in the same, and I have definitely missed this. That’s right everyone, after a sabbatical, the office has been re-opened and I am here to practice medicine once again. This is the return of the review of reviews, the article of articles, this is my prescription for all of your wrestling needs, and it is back! For good? Well that’s difficult for me to say with my work schedule, the impending arrival of the baby, and the writing position I have but I’m certainly going to give it a shot.
A lot has happened since the last edition; I lost the UWF Championship, retired Stone Cold Steve Austin after several years, had a two-part guest spot on Chillin’ with Chase(that was either since the last Dose or around the same time, perhaps before), returned as Eddie Guerrero on Smackdown, and became the co-head writer of NXT which has resulted in the acquisition of awards such as Feud of the Month, Match of the Month, and Brand of the Month. A lot of cool stuff that I’m appreciative of, and a lot of cool stuff to come I hope, as I mentioned I have a lot of real life stuff in constant development. Speaking of that, my wife and I now know what we’re having and what the due date is. On May 24th, we will be welcoming our beautiful daughter Kenidi into the world!
And since I mentioned Chillin’ with Chase, seriously listen to my two-parter if you haven’t as well as Cwalker’s guest spot, let me be the first, or one of the first, to say that I can’t wait for the podcast to return especially since we’ve got a monster idea planned with Chase having both Cwalker and I on at the same time. Mr. Raw and Smackdown and Mr. NXT, The Pope and The Rattlesnake, former tag team partners and rivals, THIS is going to be the greatest edition of Chillin’ with Chase yet and one of the best things to happen to e-feds in quite some time! While I am unsure of when it will be done, I am stoked for both the return of the podcast and the triple threat edition.
Now that I’ve gotten the personal stuff out of the way and have effectively marked out regarding my buddy Chase’s podcast, what do you say we get to the moment we’ve all been waiting for? I’m not a doctor but I play one on the internet and this is my prescription for all your wrestling needs, The Dresden Dose!
Wrestlemania season is in the air folks, and it begins with the Royal Rumble. During my three years e-fedding this is my first time being a participant in a Rumble match, so needless to say I was excited to finally have my time to shine this year. Whether I shone or not is for you to tell, all I know for certain is I had fun and I know a lot of you did too. Quality trash talks all across the board, I was very impressed with what I read and am happy to see that so many of us maxed out and went five trash talks apiece.
Royal Rumble opens with the playing of the theme of the night, “Open Your Eyes” by Alter Bridge, I certainly haven’t heard that one in quite some time, a very nice choice. Following the playing of the theme, we are welcomed by the Raw commentary team of Jerry “The King” Lawler and Michael Cole, the Smackdown commentary team of Jim Ross and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, and the NXT commentary team of Matt Striker and Joey Styles and already it’s time for the first match of the pay-per-view!
There are a few questions I’d like to raise to see how excited I can get my readers in regards to discovering the answers. Why has Sting returned to the white and black face paint, the poem recited before his entrance, and seemingly his former theme music? Where is the darkness, where is “Fear of the Dark” by Graveworm, why are the fans not booing and why is he eating up the cheers? Has Steve Borden somehow returned or has his successor merely undergone a change in appearance and/or a change of heart? It could be a result of the head trauma he sustained when he was attacked, it could be a true face turn, keep it tuned in to NXT to find out.
A little background on this match, if I may. Because of Sting being attacked by JBL and the Cabinet, he didn’t appear on NXT for several weeks, leaving his status for the Extreme Championship match in question. Would he show up to defend it? Because of this I didn’t trash talk for the match and neither did Aniking, and when the deadline for the Rumble was pushed up, I rushed Sting’s return so that I could get a trash talk in, hoping that Aniking could get one in as well, but the deadline was up as soon as it turned Thursday and as a result, I was left to retain my title by default.
Knowing what I know now, I wish I had not had Sting return last Wednesday night and then at the pay-per-view Taz would’ve gotten assaulted by The Cabinet, this serving to cover the no-show of both men as well as further the storyline by having JBL abuse his power again and punish Taz for not taking advantage of the situation that left Sting unable to defend the Extreme Championship the last time the two met. But it didn’t pan out that way, and I apologize for that, but it’s all water under the bridge with me and Aniking and the wheels keep turning on Wednesday nights.
Had Taz gotten a trash talk in, whether I got one in or not, the Cabinet was going to interfere and cost Sting the Extreme Championship. This wouldn’t have been a Taz heel turn, they would’ve done something like lay out both men and draped Taz over Sting for the pinfall, then in the lead-up to the rematch Taz would’ve been conflicted, happy on one hand for being a titleholder, and so soon after his return at that, but unhappy on the other hand because it was won with someone else’s help, help he didn’t want, and someone he respects so much in Sting got screwed over.
While those scenarios sound great, I assure you that what Sam and I have in store is going to be better. On the subject of the match itself, it was an entertaining contest and the finish was a wise decision as it furthers things between Taz and Sting and keeps Taz looking strong even in defeat. I loved him suplexing the referee afterwards, really sells his frustration. Will Taz truly continue to keep coming for the Extreme Championship? More on that later.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CM PUNK
We catch Punk as he’s arriving at the arena, and Josh Mathews is there to get his thoughts on tonight’s match. Punk says he will prove what he’s been saying the past few weeks as fact and win the NXT World Championship tonight, telling Bully Ray to cherish it while he can, because he won’t be leaving with it. So many strong characters on NXT, I love our brand.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE JARRETTS
While we heard Punk’s promo as he was cutting it, the one from Jeff and Karen is a pre-recorded promo from earlier in the day. Jeff talks about winning the Rumble later tonight and he and Karen talk trash specifically about the “Rated R Superstar” and his new stable of Trish Stratus and the “Samoan Bulldozer” Umaga, with Karen threatening to beat up Trish if she shows herself and Jeff warning to break out “El Cabong” if “tubby is let out of his cage”, that made me laugh. Jarrett really stood out in that Rumble thread, he’s still one of my favorite characters in UWF to follow.
And just like that, we’re on to our next match-up, it’s time for Raw to throw their weight around and Chase to make his return to pay-per-view! My favorite spot of this match is when Shawn went for the Pedigree and Roode reversed it into the Fujiwara armbar, that was cool to read and admittedly, he came very close to ending it then and there but the “Heartbreak Kid” was in the mood for a different tune and ended it effectively with some good old fashioned Sweet Chin Music. A very close match-up but HBK gets redemption for his friend and picks up some momentum on the Road to Wrestlemania, whatever his role may be on the grand stage.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE ROCK
Admittedly I haven’t had much time to follow Raw and Smackdown as closely as I’d like to and as closely as I have in the past, but I have had my finger on the pulse of this Rock/Dinero feud and have absolutely loved the return of Slim’s Rock as well as Cwalker’s temporary return to the trash talking aspect of e-fedding. I still owe you a Wrestlemania match C, just sayin’. Anyhoo, the Rock says there’s no way he would miss this match against Dinero and that it should’ve happened awhile ago so Pope wouldn’t have such a big head about it.
He goes on to insult the state of Arizona, though he never mentions it, and berates the hygiene of the members of the crowd that live there. Rock puts over the match and says he’s going to put Dinero back into retirement and finishes by taking a dig at CM Punk, saying he has no problem going after him next if the situation calls for it. Been there, done that if you all recall. Great promo, I love Slim’s Rock.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: AUSTIN ARIES
Chriss carves masterpieces with his words, I was so captivated by this promo, truly captivated. The roster depth in UWF is great and the return of Austin Aries is one of the reasons why. This promo both succeeds in getting you hyped up for the Rumble match and getting you to either take Aries more seriously as a threat, or desire to see him eliminated as soon as possible. Either way, truly great stuff, I enjoyed it.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: DOUBLE DRAGON’S LAIR
Before I became the co-head writer of NXT, I remember not being a fan of this trio, I didn’t see the point of the tandem and didn’t get the comedy. Well, needless to say I have since come around and I love these goofballs, making Striker mark out on commentary for these guys and the Derrick Bateman versus Bully Ray match is some of the most fun I’ve ever had writing. You can tell how much fun Captain has writing for these guys, the comedy comes to him so naturally, and I love when they interact with Ambrose, this one was particularly entertaining and I legit laughed out loud while reading it. Great, great promo.
I want to thank Sam for covering both of the NXT matches for this pay-per-view, I was suffering from a bit of writer’s block this week and was focused on real life stuff, so thanks for having my back buddy, that’s what makes booking alongside you great. This was a very close, highly competitive match-up that I thoroughly enjoyed and had a sweet finish with Punk reversing the Bully Bomb into the Go To Sleep. Congratulations to Shawn for making it to the top of the mountain after so many years, I remember how great that felt when I realized that dream as Austin last year. May you have a great reign, this is truly the cherry on top of the sundae that has been your sweet run as Punk thus far.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE MIZ
We join Miz more or less at a press conference where he is taking questions regarding the Rumble match, mostly from Joey Styles although he does take one question from a young fan. Miz says he will be very angry if he loses the match and takes a jab at Sandow and Hawkins before declaring 2013 the year of The Miz, and states that it starts tonight. Miz is another guy that has been red hot impressive since debuting on NXT, it’s a rise that many have compared to BronzyCoder and his Kane, and I would say that’s a fair comparison I just hope BigGreenApple doesn’t randomly disappear like Bronzy did, I’d like to see him be a big time player for quite some time.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CODY RHODES
I am very happy to see the return of Rey, although it doesn’t bode well for the members of the Raw and Smackdown rosters because he is intense competition, and he proved that he hasn’t missed a step in the Rumble thread as well as this promo, I’ve always been intrigued by the mentally detached spin he puts on the Rhodes character, I’d love to see a feud between him and BDC’s Mankind, the trash talking between those two would be pure gold.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: SHELTON BENJAMIN AND HIS MOMMA
This is a pick-up that I’ve yet to really understand, and I’m not sure it’s an act I can see going very far. Not because it’s an act that can’t get over, but because I feel it’s an act that Andrew can’t get over, I’m just not entertained by these promos so far. I enjoy his Rollins, I enjoyed his Batista, but right now I’m waiting to be shown something with this duo.
This match was impeccable, definite quality stuff and certainly befitting of a contest that has the World Heavyweight Championship on the line. Lewb has been unseated on Friday nights as well as Wednesday nights, but he went down swinging, and he’ll definitely be coming after both belts hungrily, eager to get back to the top of the food chain. Until then, Ambrose is the top dog once again, and deservedly so. Looking forward to this reign.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: EDGE
I got a kick out of Edge making Josh Mathews introduce him several times and then instructing the cameraman to cut him out of the shot, it’s simple heel stuff but it works and it’s entertaining. Edge tells everyone to save their cheers because they won’t have anything worth cheering for until he comes out, stating that he will save the world when he wins the match, name dropping several of his opponents in the process. By the way, Edge is the ONLY person to mention Eddie over the course of this show. Thank you, Slim.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CURT HAWKINS
Someone that really, really impressed me in that Rumble thread was Curt Hawkins, it’s a shame that Tapout didn’t get to max out like he planned but even with that in mind, he had a very strong showing and I considered him a favorite to win. This promo is up there with Aries’ promo earlier in terms of getting the reader hyped for the Rumble match itself, I enjoy its effectiveness and think he comes off just right in this promo. Not too cocky or brash, yet not underselling the situation either.
Selfishly, I am glad to see the title change hands, because it means my accolade of being the longest reigning champion remains intact. The day that Rey won the belt from me, I felt that my record was going to be easily shattered and therefore forgotten, I define myself with that title reign, it represents the contribution I have made to e-fedding. Rey has played successful character after successful character, he has won title after title, he is a legend among legends. I am someone that has tasted greatness once, and may never taste it again, so that record means everything to me and I’m thankful that it will remain intact for a while longer. In a period of time that I feel Austin is all but forgotten, it means a lot to know that I still have something.
My own personal ties to the situation aside, Dod becoming UWF Champion is similar to Shawn becoming NXT World Champion, both men rose through the ranks impressively and they did it in dominant fashion. All the hard work has paid off, but much like Lewb will be hungrily pursuing both of the titles he once called his, Rey will be coming after his ravenously. The continuation of the Rhodes/Morrison feud is something I’m looking forward to seeing. Great match.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: EDGE & ROCK
I really enjoyed the back and forth between these two, it was nice to see Captain wasn’t the only one that wrote a promo with both of his characters. My favorite line had to be what Rock said about Derrick Bateman, that made me laugh out loud, as well as when their entire back-and-forth regarding Trish. This is one sign of an e-fedder just flat out having fun, and it’s something we can all share the fun of.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: ALBERTO DEL RIO
Del Rio is seen standing backstage with Ricardo Rodriguez where both men are asked their thoughts regarding the Rumble match. Alberto says that although he has been cleared to wrestle, he will only be watching the Rumble, as will Ricardo. He explained why he joined Jeff in the ring to confront Edge and Umaga, stating how stupid he thought it was that Edge brought him in, saying it would be like him bringing in the Funkasaurus, that made me laugh out loud. Good promo.
”The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero vs. The Rock
This match lived up to the hype and more, I mean WHAT a showdown, this was sick. Dinero and Rock threw absolutely everything at each other and more, I can safely say this was worth Dinero coming out of retirement for and if this is the Rock’s final swan song, I can’t think of a better note to go out on. Awesome, amazing stuff.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: DAMIEN SANDOW
Much like the Jarretts’ promo from earlier, this promo comes to us pre-taped, as Sandow himself is kind enough to point out, I thought that was a nice touch. Damien walks us through his day and what he has done to prepare for the Rumble match, and states that he will win and in doing so, bring everyone closer to the enlightenment they are in such dire need of. I love Rey’s Sandow.
THE RUMBLE MATCH
This match is massive so I’m just going to list some notable spots.
“Road Dogg” Jesse James is a surprise entrant at number four- I’m a fan of the “Road Dogg” and I enjoyed it when he was a surprise entrant in the actual Rumble a few years ago and fully expect him to be in this year’s Rumble, so I definitely enjoyed this and was a bit surprised but also pleased regarding his duration in the match.
Rey Mysterio is a surprise entrant at number eight- There are a few people I’m sure that thought this was Chase’s return as Mysterio, but I didn’t find myself left with that impression, but it was still a nice treat, especially since it was a brief reuniting of the “Justice League”.
Ryback is a surprise entrant at number ten- I wasn’t expecting this, but it was a nice surprise, especially considering the amount of destruction he caused while he was in the match, much like Ryback will in the actual Rumble I’m sure. I’ve always wondered why no one has picked up Ryback, but it doesn’t seem like anyone has, I think it was just a creative way to get rid of some of the entrants.
Eddie Guerrero delivers the Three Amigos to Ryback- I thought this was cool, especially once you consider all of the havoc Ryback wreaked and what a feat of strength it is. It was a nice compliment to Eddie I feel.
Aries, Christian, and Guerrero deliver a triple dropkick to Big Show- This was another cool spot, because much like the Three Amigos spot, I can visualize it in my mind and that helps me to appreciate it more.
Stone Cold Steve Haastin- When I kept seeing Christian mention the fact that he ended Austin’s career in the Rumble thread, I had a feeling that something like this was going to happen, and quite honestly I marked out when it did. I wasn’t expecting it to end up being Charlie Haas dressed as Stone Cold but I’ll take it, Christian got another can of whoopass opened up on him by the Texas Rattlesnake and Steve didn’t even have to touch him. I enjoyed this very much.
FINAL THOUGHTS
The Royal Rumble match is easily the winner of the Match of the Month award, and is certainly one of the better matches that has ever been written in UWF or otherwise, Cwalker went above and beyond and delivered not only a quality match but a spectacular pay-per-view. Thank you Cwalker, Sam, Shawn, BDC, Slim, Chriss, CaptainxBumout, BigGreenApple, rawisrey, Andrew, and Tapout for your contributions to this awesome show.
But that’s not all folks, because before the dust from the Rumble has even had the chance to settle, the landscape for the Rumble fallout has been set.
This Sunday, January the 27th, Smackdown returns in a big way with four star-studded matches that can’t be missed! In the opening contest, the “Intellectual Savior of the Unwashed Masses” and one-third of Y.E.S., Damien Sandow, will take on the Latino Heat and “Smackdown’s Forgotten Signing” Eddie Guerrero. It’s the first time UWF has seen Rey versus Dresden in quite some time and it’s going to deliver for that reason and many other reasons.
Also, in a non-title match-up, the “Rated R” European Champion Edge takes on one-half of the UWF Tag Team Champions John Cena. It’s Slim versus Blizzard and it’s going to be absolutely off the charts. And the Television Championship will be on the line when Daniel Bryan defends his belt against Alberto Del Rio, who has recently been cleared to return to active competition. Can BDC put a different kind of gold around his waist or will Hoov prove too difficult to usurp?
And in the main event, just several days after winning it, Dean Ambrose will put his World Heavyweight Championship on the line in a rematch against Jeff Hardy, the man he won it from, except this time it’ll be in a match specialty where Ambrose thrives, Extreme Rules. It’ll be a bloodbath, it’ll be a classic, and it’ll be a great new chapter in the battle that is Ambrose/Hardy. I have faith that Captain can keep his belt, but as I said earlier, Lewb won’t make it easy for him.
On Tuesday, January the 29th, Tuesday Night Raw comes back with the great action its famous for with three high quality matches. First, in singles competition, Wade Barrett will take on Shelton Benjamin. I’m looking forward to seeing what Andrew can really do as Benjamin, and Captain Charisma is very impressive as Barrett, so I’m definitely looking forward to this one.
In non-title action, Antonio Cesaro will still have his hands full when he takes on the “Monster” Abyss. This will be an entertaining exchange for sure given the difference between Cesaro and Abyss, as well as the fact that Sam and BDC always deliver the goods, regardless of their opponent.
And in tag team warfare, Christian and Robert Roode will team up to take on the duo of Shawn Michaels and Mr. Anderson. Killz and Shawn as well as Chase and Aniking are both impressive teams, I’m looking forward to seeing the differences between Roode and Michaels continue as well as reading Christian’s reaction to what happened to him at the Rumble.
On Wednesday, January the 30th, Wednesday Night NXT comes rolling back with force, and a new banner. With the Rumble in the books, JBL’s already thinking of No Way Out as he’s booked five qualifying matches to determine who will challenge CM Punk for the NXT World Championship inside the Elimination Chamber.
First, it’s a battle of the Cabinet members as the “Long Island Iced Z” Zack Ryder takes on the “Greatest Man That Ever Lived” Austin Aries. Hoov already has a post up, and I’m glad to see that kind of initiative now that no-shows are going to start counting against everyone starting with this edition of NXT. Because of the fact that these two are in a stable together, it’ll be interesting to read the trash talks they exchange as well as see how the match itself goes and who advances to the Chamber.
Next, another Cabinet member is in action as Darren Young takes on the “War Machine” Rhino. Rated R Superstar has just returned from his temporary ban and Sabazon has been missing in action for several weeks, so I’m thinking we may know one of the men that will be challenging for Shawn’s title already. Hopefully I’m wrong and Sabazon shows up.
In the middle of the pack, it’s one-half of the “Modern Day Double Dragons” in action against one-third of the “Purveyors of Poison” when Johnny Curtis takes on Seth Rollins. Andrew already has a post up, which pleases me in regards to his initiative. Hopefully these guys will get to go more than one a piece, I really want to see these guys go a few rounds, especially considering what’s at stake.
For match number four, it’s one-third of the “Purveyors of Poison” taking on a man that’s been known to come to the aid of the “Purveyors of Poison” in the past when Kane squares off with Taz. I am hopeful that this week will be mine and Aniking’s chance to go to war like we all know that we can, I’m looking forward to it and make no mistake, I’m hungry for a spot in that Chamber.
And in the main event, it’s the former World Champion against the “Phenomenal One” as Bully Ray climbs in the ring with AJ Styles. I’m sure Ray will be none too happy about having to compete for another shot at the belt when the former champ usually has a guaranteed rematch. How impressive would it be for Styles to earn himself a Chamber spot after only a few weeks back? I know Lewb and Chase can tear it up and I hope they do!
Well folks, that’s going to do it for this edition, I hope you enjoyed the read and have likes, rep, and comments for me, I would certainly appreciate it. I don’t know when the next edition will be but I hope it’ll be on the 31st after Smackdown, Raw, and NXT have all gone up. Until then, the doctor is out!
A lot has happened since the last edition; I lost the UWF Championship, retired Stone Cold Steve Austin after several years, had a two-part guest spot on Chillin’ with Chase(that was either since the last Dose or around the same time, perhaps before), returned as Eddie Guerrero on Smackdown, and became the co-head writer of NXT which has resulted in the acquisition of awards such as Feud of the Month, Match of the Month, and Brand of the Month. A lot of cool stuff that I’m appreciative of, and a lot of cool stuff to come I hope, as I mentioned I have a lot of real life stuff in constant development. Speaking of that, my wife and I now know what we’re having and what the due date is. On May 24th, we will be welcoming our beautiful daughter Kenidi into the world!
And since I mentioned Chillin’ with Chase, seriously listen to my two-parter if you haven’t as well as Cwalker’s guest spot, let me be the first, or one of the first, to say that I can’t wait for the podcast to return especially since we’ve got a monster idea planned with Chase having both Cwalker and I on at the same time. Mr. Raw and Smackdown and Mr. NXT, The Pope and The Rattlesnake, former tag team partners and rivals, THIS is going to be the greatest edition of Chillin’ with Chase yet and one of the best things to happen to e-feds in quite some time! While I am unsure of when it will be done, I am stoked for both the return of the podcast and the triple threat edition.
Now that I’ve gotten the personal stuff out of the way and have effectively marked out regarding my buddy Chase’s podcast, what do you say we get to the moment we’ve all been waiting for? I’m not a doctor but I play one on the internet and this is my prescription for all your wrestling needs, The Dresden Dose!
Wrestlemania season is in the air folks, and it begins with the Royal Rumble. During my three years e-fedding this is my first time being a participant in a Rumble match, so needless to say I was excited to finally have my time to shine this year. Whether I shone or not is for you to tell, all I know for certain is I had fun and I know a lot of you did too. Quality trash talks all across the board, I was very impressed with what I read and am happy to see that so many of us maxed out and went five trash talks apiece.
Royal Rumble opens with the playing of the theme of the night, “Open Your Eyes” by Alter Bridge, I certainly haven’t heard that one in quite some time, a very nice choice. Following the playing of the theme, we are welcomed by the Raw commentary team of Jerry “The King” Lawler and Michael Cole, the Smackdown commentary team of Jim Ross and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, and the NXT commentary team of Matt Striker and Joey Styles and already it’s time for the first match of the pay-per-view!
There are a few questions I’d like to raise to see how excited I can get my readers in regards to discovering the answers. Why has Sting returned to the white and black face paint, the poem recited before his entrance, and seemingly his former theme music? Where is the darkness, where is “Fear of the Dark” by Graveworm, why are the fans not booing and why is he eating up the cheers? Has Steve Borden somehow returned or has his successor merely undergone a change in appearance and/or a change of heart? It could be a result of the head trauma he sustained when he was attacked, it could be a true face turn, keep it tuned in to NXT to find out.
A little background on this match, if I may. Because of Sting being attacked by JBL and the Cabinet, he didn’t appear on NXT for several weeks, leaving his status for the Extreme Championship match in question. Would he show up to defend it? Because of this I didn’t trash talk for the match and neither did Aniking, and when the deadline for the Rumble was pushed up, I rushed Sting’s return so that I could get a trash talk in, hoping that Aniking could get one in as well, but the deadline was up as soon as it turned Thursday and as a result, I was left to retain my title by default.
Knowing what I know now, I wish I had not had Sting return last Wednesday night and then at the pay-per-view Taz would’ve gotten assaulted by The Cabinet, this serving to cover the no-show of both men as well as further the storyline by having JBL abuse his power again and punish Taz for not taking advantage of the situation that left Sting unable to defend the Extreme Championship the last time the two met. But it didn’t pan out that way, and I apologize for that, but it’s all water under the bridge with me and Aniking and the wheels keep turning on Wednesday nights.
Had Taz gotten a trash talk in, whether I got one in or not, the Cabinet was going to interfere and cost Sting the Extreme Championship. This wouldn’t have been a Taz heel turn, they would’ve done something like lay out both men and draped Taz over Sting for the pinfall, then in the lead-up to the rematch Taz would’ve been conflicted, happy on one hand for being a titleholder, and so soon after his return at that, but unhappy on the other hand because it was won with someone else’s help, help he didn’t want, and someone he respects so much in Sting got screwed over.
While those scenarios sound great, I assure you that what Sam and I have in store is going to be better. On the subject of the match itself, it was an entertaining contest and the finish was a wise decision as it furthers things between Taz and Sting and keeps Taz looking strong even in defeat. I loved him suplexing the referee afterwards, really sells his frustration. Will Taz truly continue to keep coming for the Extreme Championship? More on that later.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CM PUNK
We catch Punk as he’s arriving at the arena, and Josh Mathews is there to get his thoughts on tonight’s match. Punk says he will prove what he’s been saying the past few weeks as fact and win the NXT World Championship tonight, telling Bully Ray to cherish it while he can, because he won’t be leaving with it. So many strong characters on NXT, I love our brand.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE JARRETTS
While we heard Punk’s promo as he was cutting it, the one from Jeff and Karen is a pre-recorded promo from earlier in the day. Jeff talks about winning the Rumble later tonight and he and Karen talk trash specifically about the “Rated R Superstar” and his new stable of Trish Stratus and the “Samoan Bulldozer” Umaga, with Karen threatening to beat up Trish if she shows herself and Jeff warning to break out “El Cabong” if “tubby is let out of his cage”, that made me laugh. Jarrett really stood out in that Rumble thread, he’s still one of my favorite characters in UWF to follow.
And just like that, we’re on to our next match-up, it’s time for Raw to throw their weight around and Chase to make his return to pay-per-view! My favorite spot of this match is when Shawn went for the Pedigree and Roode reversed it into the Fujiwara armbar, that was cool to read and admittedly, he came very close to ending it then and there but the “Heartbreak Kid” was in the mood for a different tune and ended it effectively with some good old fashioned Sweet Chin Music. A very close match-up but HBK gets redemption for his friend and picks up some momentum on the Road to Wrestlemania, whatever his role may be on the grand stage.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE ROCK
Admittedly I haven’t had much time to follow Raw and Smackdown as closely as I’d like to and as closely as I have in the past, but I have had my finger on the pulse of this Rock/Dinero feud and have absolutely loved the return of Slim’s Rock as well as Cwalker’s temporary return to the trash talking aspect of e-fedding. I still owe you a Wrestlemania match C, just sayin’. Anyhoo, the Rock says there’s no way he would miss this match against Dinero and that it should’ve happened awhile ago so Pope wouldn’t have such a big head about it.
He goes on to insult the state of Arizona, though he never mentions it, and berates the hygiene of the members of the crowd that live there. Rock puts over the match and says he’s going to put Dinero back into retirement and finishes by taking a dig at CM Punk, saying he has no problem going after him next if the situation calls for it. Been there, done that if you all recall. Great promo, I love Slim’s Rock.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: AUSTIN ARIES
Chriss carves masterpieces with his words, I was so captivated by this promo, truly captivated. The roster depth in UWF is great and the return of Austin Aries is one of the reasons why. This promo both succeeds in getting you hyped up for the Rumble match and getting you to either take Aries more seriously as a threat, or desire to see him eliminated as soon as possible. Either way, truly great stuff, I enjoyed it.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: DOUBLE DRAGON’S LAIR
Before I became the co-head writer of NXT, I remember not being a fan of this trio, I didn’t see the point of the tandem and didn’t get the comedy. Well, needless to say I have since come around and I love these goofballs, making Striker mark out on commentary for these guys and the Derrick Bateman versus Bully Ray match is some of the most fun I’ve ever had writing. You can tell how much fun Captain has writing for these guys, the comedy comes to him so naturally, and I love when they interact with Ambrose, this one was particularly entertaining and I legit laughed out loud while reading it. Great, great promo.
I want to thank Sam for covering both of the NXT matches for this pay-per-view, I was suffering from a bit of writer’s block this week and was focused on real life stuff, so thanks for having my back buddy, that’s what makes booking alongside you great. This was a very close, highly competitive match-up that I thoroughly enjoyed and had a sweet finish with Punk reversing the Bully Bomb into the Go To Sleep. Congratulations to Shawn for making it to the top of the mountain after so many years, I remember how great that felt when I realized that dream as Austin last year. May you have a great reign, this is truly the cherry on top of the sundae that has been your sweet run as Punk thus far.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: THE MIZ
We join Miz more or less at a press conference where he is taking questions regarding the Rumble match, mostly from Joey Styles although he does take one question from a young fan. Miz says he will be very angry if he loses the match and takes a jab at Sandow and Hawkins before declaring 2013 the year of The Miz, and states that it starts tonight. Miz is another guy that has been red hot impressive since debuting on NXT, it’s a rise that many have compared to BronzyCoder and his Kane, and I would say that’s a fair comparison I just hope BigGreenApple doesn’t randomly disappear like Bronzy did, I’d like to see him be a big time player for quite some time.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CODY RHODES
I am very happy to see the return of Rey, although it doesn’t bode well for the members of the Raw and Smackdown rosters because he is intense competition, and he proved that he hasn’t missed a step in the Rumble thread as well as this promo, I’ve always been intrigued by the mentally detached spin he puts on the Rhodes character, I’d love to see a feud between him and BDC’s Mankind, the trash talking between those two would be pure gold.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: SHELTON BENJAMIN AND HIS MOMMA
This is a pick-up that I’ve yet to really understand, and I’m not sure it’s an act I can see going very far. Not because it’s an act that can’t get over, but because I feel it’s an act that Andrew can’t get over, I’m just not entertained by these promos so far. I enjoy his Rollins, I enjoyed his Batista, but right now I’m waiting to be shown something with this duo.
This match was impeccable, definite quality stuff and certainly befitting of a contest that has the World Heavyweight Championship on the line. Lewb has been unseated on Friday nights as well as Wednesday nights, but he went down swinging, and he’ll definitely be coming after both belts hungrily, eager to get back to the top of the food chain. Until then, Ambrose is the top dog once again, and deservedly so. Looking forward to this reign.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: EDGE
I got a kick out of Edge making Josh Mathews introduce him several times and then instructing the cameraman to cut him out of the shot, it’s simple heel stuff but it works and it’s entertaining. Edge tells everyone to save their cheers because they won’t have anything worth cheering for until he comes out, stating that he will save the world when he wins the match, name dropping several of his opponents in the process. By the way, Edge is the ONLY person to mention Eddie over the course of this show. Thank you, Slim.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: CURT HAWKINS
Someone that really, really impressed me in that Rumble thread was Curt Hawkins, it’s a shame that Tapout didn’t get to max out like he planned but even with that in mind, he had a very strong showing and I considered him a favorite to win. This promo is up there with Aries’ promo earlier in terms of getting the reader hyped for the Rumble match itself, I enjoy its effectiveness and think he comes off just right in this promo. Not too cocky or brash, yet not underselling the situation either.
Selfishly, I am glad to see the title change hands, because it means my accolade of being the longest reigning champion remains intact. The day that Rey won the belt from me, I felt that my record was going to be easily shattered and therefore forgotten, I define myself with that title reign, it represents the contribution I have made to e-fedding. Rey has played successful character after successful character, he has won title after title, he is a legend among legends. I am someone that has tasted greatness once, and may never taste it again, so that record means everything to me and I’m thankful that it will remain intact for a while longer. In a period of time that I feel Austin is all but forgotten, it means a lot to know that I still have something.
My own personal ties to the situation aside, Dod becoming UWF Champion is similar to Shawn becoming NXT World Champion, both men rose through the ranks impressively and they did it in dominant fashion. All the hard work has paid off, but much like Lewb will be hungrily pursuing both of the titles he once called his, Rey will be coming after his ravenously. The continuation of the Rhodes/Morrison feud is something I’m looking forward to seeing. Great match.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: EDGE & ROCK
I really enjoyed the back and forth between these two, it was nice to see Captain wasn’t the only one that wrote a promo with both of his characters. My favorite line had to be what Rock said about Derrick Bateman, that made me laugh out loud, as well as when their entire back-and-forth regarding Trish. This is one sign of an e-fedder just flat out having fun, and it’s something we can all share the fun of.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: ALBERTO DEL RIO
Del Rio is seen standing backstage with Ricardo Rodriguez where both men are asked their thoughts regarding the Rumble match. Alberto says that although he has been cleared to wrestle, he will only be watching the Rumble, as will Ricardo. He explained why he joined Jeff in the ring to confront Edge and Umaga, stating how stupid he thought it was that Edge brought him in, saying it would be like him bringing in the Funkasaurus, that made me laugh out loud. Good promo.
”The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero vs. The Rock
This match lived up to the hype and more, I mean WHAT a showdown, this was sick. Dinero and Rock threw absolutely everything at each other and more, I can safely say this was worth Dinero coming out of retirement for and if this is the Rock’s final swan song, I can’t think of a better note to go out on. Awesome, amazing stuff.
BACKSTAGE PROMO: DAMIEN SANDOW
Much like the Jarretts’ promo from earlier, this promo comes to us pre-taped, as Sandow himself is kind enough to point out, I thought that was a nice touch. Damien walks us through his day and what he has done to prepare for the Rumble match, and states that he will win and in doing so, bring everyone closer to the enlightenment they are in such dire need of. I love Rey’s Sandow.
THE RUMBLE MATCH
This match is massive so I’m just going to list some notable spots.
“Road Dogg” Jesse James is a surprise entrant at number four- I’m a fan of the “Road Dogg” and I enjoyed it when he was a surprise entrant in the actual Rumble a few years ago and fully expect him to be in this year’s Rumble, so I definitely enjoyed this and was a bit surprised but also pleased regarding his duration in the match.
Rey Mysterio is a surprise entrant at number eight- There are a few people I’m sure that thought this was Chase’s return as Mysterio, but I didn’t find myself left with that impression, but it was still a nice treat, especially since it was a brief reuniting of the “Justice League”.
Ryback is a surprise entrant at number ten- I wasn’t expecting this, but it was a nice surprise, especially considering the amount of destruction he caused while he was in the match, much like Ryback will in the actual Rumble I’m sure. I’ve always wondered why no one has picked up Ryback, but it doesn’t seem like anyone has, I think it was just a creative way to get rid of some of the entrants.
Eddie Guerrero delivers the Three Amigos to Ryback- I thought this was cool, especially once you consider all of the havoc Ryback wreaked and what a feat of strength it is. It was a nice compliment to Eddie I feel.
Aries, Christian, and Guerrero deliver a triple dropkick to Big Show- This was another cool spot, because much like the Three Amigos spot, I can visualize it in my mind and that helps me to appreciate it more.
Stone Cold Steve Haastin- When I kept seeing Christian mention the fact that he ended Austin’s career in the Rumble thread, I had a feeling that something like this was going to happen, and quite honestly I marked out when it did. I wasn’t expecting it to end up being Charlie Haas dressed as Stone Cold but I’ll take it, Christian got another can of whoopass opened up on him by the Texas Rattlesnake and Steve didn’t even have to touch him. I enjoyed this very much.
FINAL THOUGHTS
The Royal Rumble match is easily the winner of the Match of the Month award, and is certainly one of the better matches that has ever been written in UWF or otherwise, Cwalker went above and beyond and delivered not only a quality match but a spectacular pay-per-view. Thank you Cwalker, Sam, Shawn, BDC, Slim, Chriss, CaptainxBumout, BigGreenApple, rawisrey, Andrew, and Tapout for your contributions to this awesome show.
But that’s not all folks, because before the dust from the Rumble has even had the chance to settle, the landscape for the Rumble fallout has been set.
This Sunday, January the 27th, Smackdown returns in a big way with four star-studded matches that can’t be missed! In the opening contest, the “Intellectual Savior of the Unwashed Masses” and one-third of Y.E.S., Damien Sandow, will take on the Latino Heat and “Smackdown’s Forgotten Signing” Eddie Guerrero. It’s the first time UWF has seen Rey versus Dresden in quite some time and it’s going to deliver for that reason and many other reasons.
Also, in a non-title match-up, the “Rated R” European Champion Edge takes on one-half of the UWF Tag Team Champions John Cena. It’s Slim versus Blizzard and it’s going to be absolutely off the charts. And the Television Championship will be on the line when Daniel Bryan defends his belt against Alberto Del Rio, who has recently been cleared to return to active competition. Can BDC put a different kind of gold around his waist or will Hoov prove too difficult to usurp?
And in the main event, just several days after winning it, Dean Ambrose will put his World Heavyweight Championship on the line in a rematch against Jeff Hardy, the man he won it from, except this time it’ll be in a match specialty where Ambrose thrives, Extreme Rules. It’ll be a bloodbath, it’ll be a classic, and it’ll be a great new chapter in the battle that is Ambrose/Hardy. I have faith that Captain can keep his belt, but as I said earlier, Lewb won’t make it easy for him.
On Tuesday, January the 29th, Tuesday Night Raw comes back with the great action its famous for with three high quality matches. First, in singles competition, Wade Barrett will take on Shelton Benjamin. I’m looking forward to seeing what Andrew can really do as Benjamin, and Captain Charisma is very impressive as Barrett, so I’m definitely looking forward to this one.
In non-title action, Antonio Cesaro will still have his hands full when he takes on the “Monster” Abyss. This will be an entertaining exchange for sure given the difference between Cesaro and Abyss, as well as the fact that Sam and BDC always deliver the goods, regardless of their opponent.
And in tag team warfare, Christian and Robert Roode will team up to take on the duo of Shawn Michaels and Mr. Anderson. Killz and Shawn as well as Chase and Aniking are both impressive teams, I’m looking forward to seeing the differences between Roode and Michaels continue as well as reading Christian’s reaction to what happened to him at the Rumble.
On Wednesday, January the 30th, Wednesday Night NXT comes rolling back with force, and a new banner. With the Rumble in the books, JBL’s already thinking of No Way Out as he’s booked five qualifying matches to determine who will challenge CM Punk for the NXT World Championship inside the Elimination Chamber.
First, it’s a battle of the Cabinet members as the “Long Island Iced Z” Zack Ryder takes on the “Greatest Man That Ever Lived” Austin Aries. Hoov already has a post up, and I’m glad to see that kind of initiative now that no-shows are going to start counting against everyone starting with this edition of NXT. Because of the fact that these two are in a stable together, it’ll be interesting to read the trash talks they exchange as well as see how the match itself goes and who advances to the Chamber.
Next, another Cabinet member is in action as Darren Young takes on the “War Machine” Rhino. Rated R Superstar has just returned from his temporary ban and Sabazon has been missing in action for several weeks, so I’m thinking we may know one of the men that will be challenging for Shawn’s title already. Hopefully I’m wrong and Sabazon shows up.
In the middle of the pack, it’s one-half of the “Modern Day Double Dragons” in action against one-third of the “Purveyors of Poison” when Johnny Curtis takes on Seth Rollins. Andrew already has a post up, which pleases me in regards to his initiative. Hopefully these guys will get to go more than one a piece, I really want to see these guys go a few rounds, especially considering what’s at stake.
For match number four, it’s one-third of the “Purveyors of Poison” taking on a man that’s been known to come to the aid of the “Purveyors of Poison” in the past when Kane squares off with Taz. I am hopeful that this week will be mine and Aniking’s chance to go to war like we all know that we can, I’m looking forward to it and make no mistake, I’m hungry for a spot in that Chamber.
And in the main event, it’s the former World Champion against the “Phenomenal One” as Bully Ray climbs in the ring with AJ Styles. I’m sure Ray will be none too happy about having to compete for another shot at the belt when the former champ usually has a guaranteed rematch. How impressive would it be for Styles to earn himself a Chamber spot after only a few weeks back? I know Lewb and Chase can tear it up and I hope they do!
Well folks, that’s going to do it for this edition, I hope you enjoyed the read and have likes, rep, and comments for me, I would certainly appreciate it. I don’t know when the next edition will be but I hope it’ll be on the 31st after Smackdown, Raw, and NXT have all gone up. Until then, the doctor is out!
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