IWF Heatwave 8/1/10 *4 vs. 2* Moltisanti Coalition vs. Hardcore Revolution
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(We are going to be off camera for a while)
[The scene opens showing Jason and Sarah lying in bed at the hotel, there are a few items of clothing scattered across the floor, you can see a champagne bottle sitting in one of those metal bucket things, Jason gets up and out of bed, as he stands Sarah wakes up and rolls over facing him]
Sarah (in a sleepy tone of voice): What are you doing honey?
Jason: I have to go wake Jeff up; we need to get down to the studio and film The Turkey Shoot.
Sarah: Okay, say hi to Jeff for me...
[Sarah rolls over and goes back to sleep, Jason puts on some blue jeans a white t-shirt and black runners, on the way out he takes a black leather jacket off the hanger and takes his aviators out of his pocket, he walks over to the elevator and thumbs the button, after a few seconds the elevator doors open and Jason steps inside, he pushes the 4th floor button]
Random guy: Hey, aren’t you Jason Fisher?
Jason: Yeah, why?
Random Guy: You suck; you and your buddy Jeff should just retire man.
Jason: Here’s an idea, fuck off alright?
[The guy puts his hand on Jason’s shoulder and turns him around]
Random Guy: No, you fuck off!
[The guy throws a punch at Jason who ducks then pushes him into the wall and puts him into an armbar]
Jason: Look, I’m very tired and very cranky and your mouth isn’t helping, shut you’re fucking mouth or I will, do you understand?
[Just as Jason finishes the doors open and he steps out, he walks down the corridor and takes a left, he walks up to room 76 and knocks on the door]
Jason: Jeff! Get your ass out of bed, we have to go!
[The door opens revealing a very tired looking Jeff]
Jeff: Okay. Let’s go, let me change first.
[Jeff closes the door and emerges a couple of minutes later wearing black cargo pants and a brown t-shirt; they get into the elevator and go down to the lobby and get into a rental car]
Jeff: So Vino booked us in a 2 on 4 handicap match? What a prick.
Jason: it wouldn’t matter if it was 10 on 2 we still have this one bagged Jeff, think about it; why would he book us in a 4 on 2 if he wasn’t scared shitless of us?
Jeff: Yeah, that’s a good point; just wish we could get those tag titles.
Jason: Eventually, Vino’s lackeys lost to Anderson Evolution, odds are they will get the tag titles; we should kick Vino’s head in.
Jeff: Fat fuck needs to lose some weight.
Jason: Okay, here we are.
[They both get out of the car and into the studio, they get into their usual Turkey Shoot clothing which for Jason is a gray hoodie over a white t-shirt with blue jeans and his aviators, Jeff puts on his black singlet but leaves his cargo pants on]
Jeff: I’ll see you in there Jason, just gotta go get something first.
*Camera on*
IWF.com presents: The Turkey Shoot.
[The scene opens showing Jason sitting on a steel chair leaning back with a smile on his face]
Jason: Hello I’m Jason Fisher and.... Jeff! You have wood!
[The camera pans to the right past some stage lights a ladder and a cardboard cut out of a turkey with a red crosshair on it to Jeff who is standing there holding a wooden table]
Jeff: Yeah? So?
Jason: What is it for?
Jeff: Oh, I’m just getting it ready for Heatwave, I plan to put Vino’s boy toy through it after we win.
Jason: Well sit down; we have a show to record remember?
[Jeff puts the table down and walks over to the empty steel chair, he spins it around so the backrest is facing forward and he sits down resting his forearms on the top of the backrest]
Jeff: And I’m the Extreme Enigma; Jeff Jackson.
Jason: In news this week; Vino Moltisanti’s “Best New Talent†Nick Dannon got his ass handed to him on a silver platter by my colleague here; Jeff Jackson.
Jeff: Arrividerci, Nick.
Jason: After Vino saw the beating Dannon received he scrambled to book us in a handicap match, putting me and Jeff against Kiko, Rikkichet, Logan Matthews and Nick Dannon, this tells me something.
Jeff: What?
Jason: Vino is shitting his size 50’s over us, think about it; he sends his goons to beat me up at the martial arts school, then after you beat Dannon he books this.
Jeff: Good Point.
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: In other news; General Manger Vino Moltisunti...
Jeff: How many times do I have to tell you? It’s Moltisanti.
Jason: General Manager Vino Moltisanti revealed the inspiration for the name of the upcoming Pay-Per-View, Heatwave, turns out he got the idea when he found a thermometer in one of his skin folds, the temperature read 45.6 degrees Celsius.
Jeff: So there you have it; the name comes from the heat in his flab, keep on eating those canolis Vino, where would we be without them?
Jason: In other news Alex C attacked interviewer Carl Long a couple of weeks back when Carl brought up his Epilepsy, didn’t know we knew that did ya Alex? Pro tip: when you want to hide the symptoms of a disorder that can result in violence; it doesn’t help to beat the shit out of some poor guy.
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: So next up we have a new segment here on the Turkey Shoot: Where Will They Be?
Jeff: Using complicated computer stuff we are able to see where certain IWF Superstars will be in 5 years, and our first subject: Nick Dannon.
Jason: Lets jump in.
[The camera cuts to a mental hospital, Jeff Jackson has dressed up to make himself look Nick, he is pacing around his padded cell talking to himself]
Nick: Don’t be that guy.....
[Nick/Jeff see’s the camera and runs up to the door]
Nick: DONT BE THAT GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUY!!!!!!!!!
[He bursts into tears suddenly]
Nick: DOOOOOOOOON’T BE THAT GUY!
[Security runs in and sedates him as he screams “Don’t be that guy†at the top of his lungs]
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: And finally: Make sure you order Heatwave; you will see Vino’s boy toys get their asses handed to them on a silver platter.
Jeff: It shall be amazing.
Jason: Well that’s all the time we have this week because in life, there are turkeys and there is us.
Jeff: I’m Jeff Jackson.
Jason: And I am Jason Fisher, I know Kung Fu, I shall use it to win at Heatwave.
[They both begin making loud turkey noises and the scene fades]
*off camera*
Jason: We need a better idea for that last part; it is childish and stupid, just like Nick Dannon...
Jeff: Let’s go get a beer.
Jason: Sounds good.
[They get up and walk out the door and the scene fades]
[The scene opens showing Jason and Sarah lying in bed at the hotel, there are a few items of clothing scattered across the floor, you can see a champagne bottle sitting in one of those metal bucket things, Jason gets up and out of bed, as he stands Sarah wakes up and rolls over facing him]
Sarah (in a sleepy tone of voice): What are you doing honey?
Jason: I have to go wake Jeff up; we need to get down to the studio and film The Turkey Shoot.
Sarah: Okay, say hi to Jeff for me...
[Sarah rolls over and goes back to sleep, Jason puts on some blue jeans a white t-shirt and black runners, on the way out he takes a black leather jacket off the hanger and takes his aviators out of his pocket, he walks over to the elevator and thumbs the button, after a few seconds the elevator doors open and Jason steps inside, he pushes the 4th floor button]
Random guy: Hey, aren’t you Jason Fisher?
Jason: Yeah, why?
Random Guy: You suck; you and your buddy Jeff should just retire man.
Jason: Here’s an idea, fuck off alright?
[The guy puts his hand on Jason’s shoulder and turns him around]
Random Guy: No, you fuck off!
[The guy throws a punch at Jason who ducks then pushes him into the wall and puts him into an armbar]
Jason: Look, I’m very tired and very cranky and your mouth isn’t helping, shut you’re fucking mouth or I will, do you understand?
[Just as Jason finishes the doors open and he steps out, he walks down the corridor and takes a left, he walks up to room 76 and knocks on the door]
Jason: Jeff! Get your ass out of bed, we have to go!
[The door opens revealing a very tired looking Jeff]
Jeff: Okay. Let’s go, let me change first.
[Jeff closes the door and emerges a couple of minutes later wearing black cargo pants and a brown t-shirt; they get into the elevator and go down to the lobby and get into a rental car]
Jeff: So Vino booked us in a 2 on 4 handicap match? What a prick.
Jason: it wouldn’t matter if it was 10 on 2 we still have this one bagged Jeff, think about it; why would he book us in a 4 on 2 if he wasn’t scared shitless of us?
Jeff: Yeah, that’s a good point; just wish we could get those tag titles.
Jason: Eventually, Vino’s lackeys lost to Anderson Evolution, odds are they will get the tag titles; we should kick Vino’s head in.
Jeff: Fat fuck needs to lose some weight.
Jason: Okay, here we are.
[They both get out of the car and into the studio, they get into their usual Turkey Shoot clothing which for Jason is a gray hoodie over a white t-shirt with blue jeans and his aviators, Jeff puts on his black singlet but leaves his cargo pants on]
Jeff: I’ll see you in there Jason, just gotta go get something first.
*Camera on*
IWF.com presents: The Turkey Shoot.
[The scene opens showing Jason sitting on a steel chair leaning back with a smile on his face]
Jason: Hello I’m Jason Fisher and.... Jeff! You have wood!
[The camera pans to the right past some stage lights a ladder and a cardboard cut out of a turkey with a red crosshair on it to Jeff who is standing there holding a wooden table]
Jeff: Yeah? So?
Jason: What is it for?
Jeff: Oh, I’m just getting it ready for Heatwave, I plan to put Vino’s boy toy through it after we win.
Jason: Well sit down; we have a show to record remember?
[Jeff puts the table down and walks over to the empty steel chair, he spins it around so the backrest is facing forward and he sits down resting his forearms on the top of the backrest]
Jeff: And I’m the Extreme Enigma; Jeff Jackson.
Jason: In news this week; Vino Moltisanti’s “Best New Talent†Nick Dannon got his ass handed to him on a silver platter by my colleague here; Jeff Jackson.
Jeff: Arrividerci, Nick.
Jason: After Vino saw the beating Dannon received he scrambled to book us in a handicap match, putting me and Jeff against Kiko, Rikkichet, Logan Matthews and Nick Dannon, this tells me something.
Jeff: What?
Jason: Vino is shitting his size 50’s over us, think about it; he sends his goons to beat me up at the martial arts school, then after you beat Dannon he books this.
Jeff: Good Point.
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: In other news; General Manger Vino Moltisunti...
Jeff: How many times do I have to tell you? It’s Moltisanti.
Jason: General Manager Vino Moltisanti revealed the inspiration for the name of the upcoming Pay-Per-View, Heatwave, turns out he got the idea when he found a thermometer in one of his skin folds, the temperature read 45.6 degrees Celsius.
Jeff: So there you have it; the name comes from the heat in his flab, keep on eating those canolis Vino, where would we be without them?
Jason: In other news Alex C attacked interviewer Carl Long a couple of weeks back when Carl brought up his Epilepsy, didn’t know we knew that did ya Alex? Pro tip: when you want to hide the symptoms of a disorder that can result in violence; it doesn’t help to beat the shit out of some poor guy.
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: So next up we have a new segment here on the Turkey Shoot: Where Will They Be?
Jeff: Using complicated computer stuff we are able to see where certain IWF Superstars will be in 5 years, and our first subject: Nick Dannon.
Jason: Lets jump in.
[The camera cuts to a mental hospital, Jeff Jackson has dressed up to make himself look Nick, he is pacing around his padded cell talking to himself]
Nick: Don’t be that guy.....
[Nick/Jeff see’s the camera and runs up to the door]
Nick: DONT BE THAT GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUY!!!!!!!!!
[He bursts into tears suddenly]
Nick: DOOOOOOOOON’T BE THAT GUY!
[Security runs in and sedates him as he screams “Don’t be that guy†at the top of his lungs]
[The scene cuts to a picture of a turkey with a red crosshair on it, ‘Turkey Shoot’ is written in big red letters. The camera cuts back to the studio]
Jason: And finally: Make sure you order Heatwave; you will see Vino’s boy toys get their asses handed to them on a silver platter.
Jeff: It shall be amazing.
Jason: Well that’s all the time we have this week because in life, there are turkeys and there is us.
Jeff: I’m Jeff Jackson.
Jason: And I am Jason Fisher, I know Kung Fu, I shall use it to win at Heatwave.
[They both begin making loud turkey noises and the scene fades]
*off camera*
Jason: We need a better idea for that last part; it is childish and stupid, just like Nick Dannon...
Jeff: Let’s go get a beer.
Jason: Sounds good.
[They get up and walk out the door and the scene fades]
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