No point holding it off I guess.
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Monday Afternoon Onomatopoeia
Episode 1
December 20, 2010
Boom boom bang bang boom bang explosions excitement it’s a tv show.
Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, I’m Joey Styles and welcome to the very first instalment of DTF’s flagship television show, Monday Afternoon Onomatopoeia!
JBL: We have got a cracker of a show tonight folks, you haven’t seen action like this before
Styles: You got that right John, it’s certainly going to be an action packed show tonight
JBL: It’s a shame we can’t say the same about your bedroom ay Joe? (chuckles)
Styles: Glad to see we’re going to be keeping it high class at the commentary table
‘Voices’ plays over the PA system as the man crowned DTF Champion, Randy Orton, makes his way down to the ring to a chrous of boos
JBL: Now there’s a champion this company can be proud of, I’d say he’s the best champion since John Layfield
Styles: It’s a shame he never earned his championship belt
JBL: Shut it Joe, once you win a title then you can judge the calibre of a champion
Orton: What on Earth was that all about? You people dare boo Randy Orton?
Bad man’s bad words make audience go boo.
Orton: Whether you like it or not, I am the Viper, I am the Legend Killer… and I am YOUR DTF Champion.
A sinister sneer breaks out across Orton’s face as he raises his championship belt into the air
Orton: I’ve made some… let’s just call them, arrangements backstage to maintain my championship status and let me tell you, you can boo me all you like, but no matter how hard any of your beloved heroes try, the only way this belt is leaving my waist is over my cold, dead body.
‘Sexy Boy’ blares over the speakers to an enormous pop, the one and only Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels, coming down to the ring to confront the champion
HBK: For a man who didn’t even win that belt, you sure seem to talk a lot of crap Randy.
Orton’s grin turns into a pronounced frown as the crowd come alive for HBK
HBK: I’ve been in this business for more than two decades and you are the most arrogant, stuck up little prick I’ve ever come across. You talk about being the Legend Killer? Well how about you put your money where your mouth is, prove to everyone you deserve that belt. Let’s see if you can kill a real legend.
Shawn Michaels and Randy Orton get in each others faces, nose-to-nose, as they both talk trash to one another. ‘Also Sprach Zatharusa’ plays over the loud speaker as the General Manager of Monday Afternoon Onomatopoeia, the Nature Boy, Ric Flair, comes down to the ring
Flair: Woo! You boys sure do know how to start the show off with a bang! Randy, I chose you as DTF’s first champion because I see you as the future of this company. But Shawn, we’ve been friends for many years, and I see where you’re coming from. You are the past of wrestling, Randy is the future. How about you too go one-on-one and we find out who is wrestling’s present?
The crowd pop huge at the prospect of Shawn Michaels and Randy Orton going one-on-one for the DTF Championship. Before Ric can make it official however, ‘Break the Walls Down’ plays and Y2J, Chris Jericho, comes down to the ring. The crowd cheer for another one of their favourites entering the fray.
Jericho: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Are you guys for real? How can you even speak about championship matches without the Ayatollah of Rock n Rolla?!
The crowd cheer huge, getting behind the charismatic Jericho.
Jericho: As much respect as I have you Ric, you don’t think it looks a little bit strange that the two men competing for the DTF Championship are two of your closest friends? I’ve got the utmost respect for you Shawn, and Randy I really admire the confidence you have. I mean, if I had a haircut like that and stunk like baby oil, I wouldn’t leave the house, let alone go on television.
Funny jokes = crowd laughter ha ha ha ha ha.
Jericho: So how about it Ric? Let’s truly find out who really deserves to be champion, without any bias.
Flair: You’re right Chris. Shawn should have to earn his shot, as should you. So in tonight’s Main event, we’re going to find out who should be facing off with Randy Orton for the DTF Championship. Shawn Michaels versus Chris Jericho, tonight! Woo!
This gets the biggest crowd reaction of the night, as Jericho and Michaels look at each other before proceeding to shake hands. Orton shoves the two apart and raises his belt in the air once again as we head to commercial
[Commercial Break]
Batista vs. Chavo Guerrero
To describe this match in one word, gruesome. Batista dominated completely and absolutely, finishing it with a Batista Bomb. No suits and sunglasses, all animal. Chavo ended the match battered, bruised and bloodied and Batista ended it with a smear of Chavo’s blood across his chest. TL;DR? He’s fucking crazy.
Batista wins by pinfall
JBL: Batista has truly lived up to his moniker tonight
Styles: He truly has, it looks like Chavo has been mauled by a wild beast
[Commercial Break]
Styles: Welcome back to Monday Afternoon Onomatopoeia. Jeez, what does this guy want?
We return from commercials to see The Awesome One, The Miz, standing in the ring looking none too happy.
Miz: I thought there might actually be some people with half a brain, but it seems as if the people running this company are just as stupid as the people in the crowd tonight
Miz smirks at his own joke in typical tool fashion.
Miz: I’m the Miz, I’m Awesome, I should’ve been crowned DTF Champion! But no, I’m not even booked in a match tonight? Are you serious? Are you SERIOUS? I’m better than Randy Orton, I’m better than Shawn Michaels, I’m better than Chris Jericho, I’m better than all of you. And I plan on proving it. To all those losers backstage tonight, if any of you have the balls to go toe-to-toe with the Awesome One, I’m issuing an open challenge for next week, right here on Onomatopoeia.
Miz looks down the entrance ramp for a challenger, after a few moments there is no reply.
Miz: That’s exactly what I thought. Too scared! Because I’m The Miz, and I’m AWEEEEEE-
‘This Fire Burns’ plays to a mid-sized pop, The Straight Edge Superstar, CM Punk, comes down to the ring.
Miz: Well if it isn’t DTF’s resident master of boredom, CM Punk. (Miz puts on a mocking tone) I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t party, I like to sit at home and watch Desperate Housewives. Straight Edge!
Punk: (chuckle) You can mock my lifestyle all you want Miz, but at the end of the day, my body, mind and soul are in perfect condition. While yours look like you spent more time at Krispy Kreme than inside a gym.
Miz is infuriated at the comment
Miz: I can’t wait to beat your ass down next week. Hell, I’m just gonna do it right now!
Miz takes a swing at Punk, who is quick to duck and land a big right forearm of his own square on The Awesome One’s chin. Punk moves over towards Miz to continue, but he promptly rolls under the bottom rope and escapes up the entrance ramp.
JBL: Did you see that Joe? What a despicable act by a despicable human being!
Styles: I know, how low of Miz-
JBL: Miz? No, CM Punk! He is a disgusting human being, attacking The Miz like that.
[Commercial Break]
DTF Tag Team Championship
The Hardy Boys (c) vs. The United Nations w/William Regal
The Hardys started off their reign as tag team championships with a flurry of offence, greatly pleasing the crowd in the arena. It seemed as the two brothers were cruising to a victory, until an attempted Twist of Fate ended up with Matt Hardy flat on his back. From this point Nigel and Joe worked over Matt, getting close to a pinfall on several occasions. Whenever it looked like Matt would make the tag, the crafty William Regal would distract the referee or pull Jeff off the apron, stopping it from taking place. Finally after what seems like an age, Jeff gets the hot tag and the crowd goes CRAZAY~! Jeff does the typical hot tag super human attacks and climbs up to the top rope, hitting Samoa Joe with a Swanton Bomb for the pinfall.
The Hardy Boys win by pinfall
STILL DTF Tag Team Champions: The Hardy Boys
William Regal leads two of his cohorts up the ramp as The Hardy Boys celebrate in the ring, belts held aloft with pride. As they celebrate however, Booker T and Mark Henry, collectively known as Black Power, sneak into the ring from the crowd and proceed to pummel the shit out of Matt and Jeff Hardy. As the broken bodies of The Hardy Boys are rolled out of the ring by Mark Henry, Booker T goes and fetches some microphones.
Booker: AWWWWWWWWWW HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NOOOOOOOOO!
Henry: Hell nahhh!
Booker: Mark, what d’you notice about all the crackers who was just in that match before?
Henry: They all crackers!
Booker: They ALL crackers. And y’know what else I be noticin’ Mark?
Henry: What dat Book?
Booker: The two boys representin’ the African American society, y’know what they got? They got nuttin’! Absolutely nuttin’! Just like we always had when these white fish come to town, they take our shiznit and they don’t give none of it back. We weren’t even booked into a match tonight! The Worlds Strongest Man, black or white, Mark Henry and the FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME, dubya see dubya champion, Booker T, weren’t even on da card!
Henry: Dat’s whack yo.
Booker: You damn straight it’s whack! So whack we had to give these crackers the Hardy Boys a good whack
Henry: This is the 21st century, and racism is not cool dawgs.
Booker: Damn straight. We be the rightful holders of these here tag team championships and we gon’ be gittin’ our opportunity Flair! Ya dig?
Booker and Mark slam their microphones down and salute their black brothers as we go to commercial.
Styles: Now what the hell was that about?
JBL: Equality Joe, it was about equality.
[Commercial Break]
JBL: Welcome back, William Regal is back with another of his international cohorts, Sheamus. He looks big, red and ready for a fight!
Styles: You can say that again
Sheamus w/William Regal vs. Shelton Benjamin
The match began with some crafty tactics from William Regal giving Sheamus a good start. Regal distracted Shelton by climbing up onto the apron, allowing the Celtic Warrior to club his opponent in the back and begin an unholy beat down. Sheamus slammed Shelton from pillar to post for the early portions of the match, in complete control. The big momentum shift came when the Ragin’ Redhead went for a Brogue Kick, only to have Shelton duck and pull down the top rope, sending Sheamus plummeting down on top of Regal! Shelton pulled Sheamus back into the ring and went for the cover, he only collected a two count. The Gold Standard went on a crowd pleasing frenzy with his array of high flying moves coming into the fray. He climbed to the top rope, only to have Regal shake it from the apron and send Benjamin crashing down onto his family jewels. As the referee apprehended Regal, Sheamus capitalised and wrenched his adversary from the top rope, hit his Celtic Cross and got the pinfall.
Sheamus w/William Regal wins by pinfall
JBL: An emphatic victory for the Celtic Warrior
Styles: More like an abhorrent victory. Maybe he wouldn’t do so well if he didn’t have William Regal by his side
JBL: The ends justify the means Joe, and the ends look mighty fine
We head backstage where the Intercontinental Champion, John Morrison, stands with DTF’s resident interviewer for tonight, Dusty Hogan.
Dusty: John, how does it feel to be crowned the very first Intercontinental Champion?
Morrison: Dusty, it’s a great feeling to be honoured like this. Ric Flair, one of the greatest of all time, sees potential in me, and I don’t want to let him down. The Intercontinental Championship is just the beginning, by the end, I want to be break on through to the other side and one day become the DTF Champion.
Dusty: Those are some lofty heights John
Morrison: They are, but I think I can get there. A fire has been lit by this championship, and I’m not going to end up like one of those old could-have-beens searching through their soul kitchens late at night in a whiskey bar, I’m going to be on top of this company. But right now, it starts with defending my championship and getting some wins under my belt.
Dusty: How do you fe-
MVP walks into the scene, cutting Dusty Hogan off.
MVP: That was so cute John. ‘I wanna be the DTF Champion’, just darling, really. But John, you aren’t going to be going anywhere dawg. Because after I beat Rey Mysterio tonight, I’m gon’ prove that I deserve to be the Intercontinental Champion. Money talks Johnny boy, everyone knows dat.
Morrison: Talk is cheap Montel
MVP: Ha! Not my talk, my talk is diamond encrusted. You may come out here and want to please the fans and hype yoself up, but I have enough money in the bank to buy and sell you as I please.
MVP motions to someone off camera, and the gigantic Ezekiel Jackson walks into frame
MVP: This is my bodyguard, Ezekiel Jackson. He’s here to make sure losers like you don’t wreck my million dollah smile. Now I have a match to win, but you keep talkin’ yo, cause dat’s all you’ve got.
MVP and Ezekiel leave the shot as we head to commercial.
Styles: MVP up against Rey Mysterio, coming up right after this break
[Commercial Break]
Styles: Welcome back, let’s see if money really does talk
JBL: You know it does Joe, why do you think I’ve been so successful?
MVP w/Ezekiel Jackson vs. Rey Mysterio
This match went very back and forth, with each superstar getting to showcase their ability. At first Rey Mysterio was in complete control, really getting the crowd behind him and using them to fuel his assault. Rey nearly delivered the 619 early-on, but MVP rolled under the bottom rope. Rey followed him out, but he hid behind his gargantuan bodyguard Ezekiel Jackson. MVP rolled back into the ring quickly and as Rey tried to get back inside, he got dropkicked off the apron and slammed headfirst into the barricade. Ezekiel rolled him back into the ring and MVP took control from that point on. The finish came when MVP was preparing for his finishing manoeuvre, but while he was cockily gloating Rey countered into a small package! One, Two, Three!
Rey Mysterio wins by pinfall
JBL: What!? No, restart the match!
Rey quickly scrambles up the apron with a gigantic grin on his face, as MVP and Ezekiel Jackson angrily look on.
Styles: Looks like MVP’s overconfidence has come back to bite him
JBL: Disgraceful, Rey cheated. That filthy beaner.
Styles: Whoa John, settle down
JBL: You are such a racist Joe, first Black Power and now MVP. We need equality god dangit!
Styles: Whatever you say John. Stay tuned folks, up next it’s our Main Event!
[Commercial Break]
JBL: It’s time for our Main Event, the lights are on bright, who’s gonna shine?
Styles: The winner of this match will become the number one contender to the DTF Championship, so stakes are extremely high in this encounter
Main Event
Number One Contendership For The DTF Championship
Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels
The match begun with a handshake, which received a collective ‘nawww’ from everyone. Whilst the match did lack aggression and a bit of intensity, it made up for with some amazing moves and a wrestling showcase put on by two of the industries best. As is always the case when these two face each other, it was a fantastic match. Back and forth, each man struggled to gain an upper hand for an extended period. In the end, Jericho attempted a Codebreaker only to have HBK slam him down onto his back. Y2J sprung back to his feet almost immediately, but was hit with Sweet Chin Music as he did! One, two, three, it’s over!
Shawn Michaels wins by pinfall
NEW Number One Contender: Shawn Michaels
Styles: What a match!
JBL: For the first time tonight Joe, I whole heartedly agree, these two tore the house down
Jericho and Michaels have a short embrace, followed by Y2J raising Shawn’s hand to a pop from the crowd. That pop turns into some intense heat though as Randy Orton begins to come down the ramp, flanked by Batista, who charges down to the ring.
Styles: Batista? What’s he doing here?
JBL: This must’ve been what Orton meant by his ‘arrangements’ earlier tonight!
Batista slides into the ring and takes both men down simultaneously with a double clothesline. He alternates stomping their tired and motionless bodies, before hoisting Michaels up and throwing him into the ropes, hitting him with a spine buster. Y2J begins to groggily crawl to his feet, but gets nailed by a spear from the Animal. Batista grabs the Ayatollah of Rock n Rolla, and sends him crashing to the mat with a Batista Bomb! The champion now slides into the ring like a serpent, hitting a dazed HBK with the RKO! Batista and Orton stand in the ring admiring their carnage, hands held high with pride.
Styles: By themselves they were strong, but together?
JBL: They might just be unstoppable Joe
Styles: We’ll see how this develops next week, see you in seven days wrestling fans!
[End]
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Origin
January 16, 2011
Card TBA
At least you added Batista to make this storyline more interesting and possibly into a tag team kinda thing which would be interesting. Expecting Animal to turn on Orton in the future, but lets not go there yet.