Donnie watches WWF 1981

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Pedro Morales-Since 8/12/80
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
June 6th, 1981
Hambrug, PA

Tonight; Muarco vs SD.

At ringside, Vince announces that Killer Khan broke Andre's leg by jumping off the top rope on to it. Andre walks out on a crutch and his entire leg has a cast on it, and he says he will never forget and Khan will pay for it. He says he will be back and his leg is healing very well, and he is working out every day and they better be ready to run because he's going to chase them until the very end. He says he didn't know it was broken until he got in the shower and the cold water hitting it caused him pain and he had to go the hospital and that's when he got surgery and two pins were placed in his leg. He thanks the fans for sending him cards and gifts and he is very grateful to have them in his life. He will be better soon and Blassie will need to find a new man because Khan will pay for it. He's coming back stronger than ever. For a man not known for his talking or English being his first language, that was a great promo.

Match#1 King Kong Masca w/Lou Albano vs Charlie Brown & Gunn
Bad match from this boring fella. He's not Andre or Stan, or any monster that can murder two losers in really great ways. He's just a boring guy now, so this is meh as hell. He hits some backbreakers to win
1/2*

Match#2 Rick Martel & Tony Garea vs Johnny Rodz & Siccluna
i swear i've seen this match at least 20 goddamn times at this point. Nothing changes at all, so there's no need to say it again.
1/2*

Match#3 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs SD Jones
Don finally batters one of the worst dudes in the fed and it's the best. SD is complete trash and offers nothing to the match, but Don will not be denied. All the amazing strikes and great neck work is there, and it's even better with SD as the victim. He wins with his awesome splash, and to prove my point of SD being a cunt, he kicks out right on 3.
**

Post match, Muarco decks him for the good of the world.

Match#4 The Moondogs (c) w/Lou Albano vs Jack Carson & Rick McGraw (WWF World Tag Team Championship)
Vince is mad they are defending the titles when King isn't here, which is a cool little thing to add to him leaving and the mystery as to why in kayfabe. This is only 70 seconds sadly, because we can give bad wrestlers more time but not the dogs. They take Carson's head off to win
3/4*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Pedro Morales-Since 8/12/80
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
June 20th, 1981
Hambrug, PA

We open up with a new interview from Andre. We get a gross close up of the scar on his ankle, and it's proper nasty. They talk for a minute about nothing and then it suddenly cuts to another Vince/Andre interview at ringside at what i assume is Championship Wrestling. Andre talks for a minute again about his recovery, and Blassie walks on with his walking stick in hand to talk some shit. Blassie says he's washed up and through, and Andre gets PISSED and says he ain't through, AND HE WAHCKS BLASSIE IN THE HEAD WITH HIS CRUTCH. ANDRE FALLS TO THE APRON AS HE'S ON ONE LEG NOW, AND KHAN RUNS OUT AND SMASHES THE CRUTCH ON THE BACK OF ANDRE'S HEAD AND BLASSIE HITS ANDRE IN THE BROKEN ANKLE WITH HIS STICK AND THEY RUN FOR IT. Patterson helps Andre back up to his feet and he is maaaaad. We go back to the interview and Andre says he is ready for revenge and he's watching his back, and he will take Blassie out if he dares come to the ring, and then it's just him and Khan. He stands up and says Khan is 6ft6, but he's the real giant and he's going to prove it.

Match#1 Mill Mascares vs Pete Doherty
Not that one, but man that would be wild as fuck and the best Mill match ever. Horrible as always, and i don't want to write any more.
1/2*

Match#2 Pedro Morales vs Frank Savage
Hits keep on coming as they say. Bad and dull, and hey fuck this

Match#3 King Kong Masca vs Steve King
OH FUCK YOU

Match#4 The Moondogs w/Lou Albano vs Curt Hennig & Jack Carson
Dogs save the day with a super fun squash of a couple of perfect jobbers. Curt is just a baby and gets mauled, but he takes a good beating and i wish it was 87 already. They beat the crap out of Carson as well and eventually take his head off to win
**

 

[BigVanDonnie]

Pedro Morales (c) vs Don Muarco (WWF Intercontiental Championship-20/6//81)
Not very good sadly, which is heartbreaking for Don's big break, but this old shit isn't going to have the match of the night even with one of the best in the world there with him. Even more so when he's losing, and he's probably being a prick because of it. Muarco spends a long time chinlocking it up and not much else, and it fucking sucks because we know how good he is, and how much better he deserves. They sit in the sleeper/choke for nearly 5 minutes and Pedro is the first man to survive it, which is fair given he's the champ, but imagine if the match had been good before that point. Pedro has to go to the eyes to get out because he's a bitch. His comeback is pretty bad as it's the super lame wind-up punches and whatnot, Don at least takes some wild bumps for him, but it doesn't matter at this point. The ref gets bumped when Pedro pushes Don into him, Pedro gets him in the BC but the ref is dead so he lets go, and Don grabs some knucks and KO's the old bastard to win the title.
*

Sucks to see Muarco win the title in such a crap match, but at least he has it and WWF won't do something stupid like giving the title back to Pedro and have him hold for another 2 fucking years until Don finally ends it....

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
June 27th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Strong Kobayashi vs Steve King

SK is back for a short stay and i can't say i really missed him, or remembered him tbh. This isn't much as he mostly does some lazy choking and bad strikes, so he can leave again right now. He wins with an atomic drop
1/2*

Match#2 King Kong Masca w/Lou Albano vs Jack Carson
Crummy stuff once again, and I'm sick of it. Backbreaker does it
1/2*

Match#3 Johnny Rodz vs Curt Hennig
HELL YEAH. Rodz guides the kid through some fun mat work and Curt does very well for himself, and you can see he has something to him. He gives him some offence as well and it all looks very good, but unpolished as you would expect. Rodz easily takes back over and beats the crap out of him in amazing fashion. He plays with his food for too long, AND CURT GETS A SUNSET FLIP TO WIN
**1/2

Post match, Rodz attacks him, but the kid holds his own and holds the ring.

Match#4 Killer Khan w/Classie Freddie Blassie vs Fred Marzino
Horrible stuff from the big idiot, and the sooner he goes the better it'll be. Bad knee ends it
1/2*

At ringside, Blassie says Khan is going to break Andre's bad leg again and then his good, and then he'll be out of wrestling for good. Blassie isn't worried about Andre doing anything because he has a Killer.

Match#5 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Pete Mitchell
This was taped weeks before he won the IC title, so they talk a lot of about him going after Backlund, and not Pedro. Squash is good as always, and Don really is the best dude in the company at this point. He hits a GROSS Tombstone and then a legdrop to win
**

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
July 4th, 1981
Hambrug, PA

They air the IC title match.

Match#1 George Steele w/Classie Freddie Blassie vs Pete Mitchell
Animal Squash is an Animal squash. Hammerlock ends it
3/4*

At ringside, Vince brings out Muarco and GW to celebrate their victory over true evil. GW says he doesn't give a damn what these morons think about them winning the title. They made a promise on their first night to win ALL the titles, and this is the first down and there is one to go. He is so proud of his man getting it down. He says GW looked over the tape and found nothing illegal in their win. GW dares Pedro to take them to court if he thinks he had a case, but he doesn't and he's a yellow liar. Don says he can be mellow and electric when he needs to be, but we are seeing magnificence in person and that's the way it will stay. GW says this is stage one and the next stage is holding both titles at the same time.

Match#2 Tony Garea vs Johnny Rodz
Love to see Rodz getting real singles matches again. He does his normal awesome stuff and Tony is just along for the ride, and really brings nothing to the table. There's a reason he was never a singles star. Rodz beats his ass for a while and it's a ton of fun, especially seeing how smug he is during the entire thing. sadly, Tony wins a sunset flip, which is Johnny's only known weakness
**

Match#3 Greg Valentine w/Grand Wizard vs Steve King
THE FUCKING HAMMER IS BACK. JESUS CHRIST YES. He kicks the absolute fuck out of the jobber and it's the best, and you can't truly know how much i missed this. Figure Four does it
**

At ringside, Patterson interviews them. GW says Hammer is brining new things to the table and he has a new version of the Figure Four, and it won't be too long until he beats Backlund with it. He got ran out for breaking a few small legs on a few small bums, and he's waiting for the right leg this time. AMAZING.

Match#4 King Kong Masca w/Lou Albano vs Angelo Gomez
Nothing can bring down my mood, so KKM gets a pass this week. Backbreaker ends it
1/2*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
July 18th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

TONIGHT. BACKLUND VS REX

Match#1 Killer Khan w/Classy Freddie Blassie vs Rick McGraw
Andre's old partner gets fed to this idiot as part of the story and while it makes sense, it doesn't make a good match. The kid tries his best to get something out of him, but there's nothing there to find. Bad shitty knee does it
1/2*

They're interviewed at ringside and say nothing new.

Match#2 Bob Backlund vs Moondog Rex w/Lou Albano
Great showcase for Bobby. Awesome arm work on the big man where he everything he does looks violent and mean, and Rex sells it really well. Spot comes out to watch and add some drama to it, which is always nice. Spot trips him and Rex gets some offence in and it's fun stuff, even it's far too short. Bob fights back and hits his 3 moves of doom (piledriver, atomic drop and fancy rollup) to win
**

Post match, he fights all three of them and holds the ring.

the file fucks up and ends there, so not a big loss

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; The Moondogs -Since 17/3/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
July 25th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 The Moondogs (c) w/Lou Albano vs Rick Martel & Tony Garea (WWF Tag Team Championship)
Goddamn it, i can never escape this it seems. Fun opening few minutes with the faces pinballing the dogs all over the place, and it's the best they've looked since the title switch. Probably goes too long as it verges into heel in peril status and it's what you don't want to see. The Dogs never get control as the babyfaces keep outsmarting them and making them look like assholes, and it's a bad choice to do the new champs like this. Martel gets a sunset flip to win the titles back because life sucks
*1/2

At ringside, Patterson interviews the new champs. They are HAPPY and always believed, and every other bullshit babyface note.

They replay the Rodz/Hennig match.

The tag champs come out and cut another lame ass promo.

Match#2 Andre The Giant vs Pete Mitchell & Jerry Johnson
Andre is back and very mad about his leg, so he murders these two morons in amazing fashion and it rocks. He wins with a gross elbow drop
**

At ringside, Patterson brings out Rick McGraw in a neck brace after the Khan match last week. He gets heckled by the fans and you can hear a few laugh at him, which rules because fuck anything that's mean to help Khan. McGraw is sad that his career might be over, and he hopes Andre serves justice for them both.

Match#3 Greg Valentine w/Grand Wizard vs Jack Carson
God yes. Wonderful stuff from Hammer as always, and i can't wait for him to be here full time from 84 onwards. Just one of the best to ever do it. Figure Four ends the fun
**

Match#4 King Kong Masca w/Lou Albano vs Steve King
"Boy he's a real MEANIE" -Vince
1/2*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
August 1st, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs SD Jones & Angelo Gomez
Fuji is back and he has a new parter with him in Saito. Doesn't suddenly make him a good wrestler, but at least he's back and close to being an awesome manager for one of the best teams ever. This is not good as it's shitty nerve holds and terrible martial art strikes from two dudes who suuuuuuck at both. Saito wins with a kick with a loaded boot
1/2*

Match#2 Johnny Rodz vs Pedro Morlaes
Oh, not again. thankfully not long enough to really piss me off, but still bad. Crab ends it
1/2*

Match#3 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Curt Hennig
The fans chant beach bum and blow airhorns and the entire thing is a great scene. It pisses him ofc, and he batters the shit out of the kid for s few minutes, and it's fucking great. Big Splash does it
**

Match#4 Killer Khan w/Freddie Blassie vs Charlie Brown
Very bad stuff from KK. The best part about this push is how unover he is even after taking out Andre. Really show how bad of an idea it was to pick him. Knee does it
1/2*

Post match, they take Brown out on a stretcher. YOU WILL HATE KHAN GODDAMN IT PAL

They replay a Steele squash from a few weeks ago, the one where he hits the kid with a glass of water. Weird.

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
August 8th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 SD Jones vs Ron Shaw
Nearly 6 minutes long for some reason, and hey it blows. SD wins with a neckbreaker
1/2*

Match#2 Killer Khan w/Freddie Blassie vs Steve King
PLEASE BOO HIM, WE NEED TO MAKE YOU GIVE A SHIT ABOUT HIM WHEN ANDRE NUKES HIM.
1/2*

Match#3 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs DeNucci
LOTS of stalling for most of this as Don keeps running out to the floor and jawing with the fans, and it's much better than the prospect of these two wrestling for the same length of time. Muarco ends up hitting him the throat with the spike and the old prick gets counted out.
BEACH BUM

Patterson interviews them at ringside. GW again says they beat Pedro fair and square and everyone needs to shut up about. Don rants again about being called a beach bum and how he deserves more respect. He calls Pedro a chapter in his book and a stepping stone to to history of being the first man to hold the IC and World title at the same time. Don throws the title on the ground and spits on it and says it means nothing to him other than the history it can give him. HE IS THE NEW LEGEND AND THIS IS A STEPPING STONE TO GREATNESS. Patterson calls him a bum for acting like this, so Don goes another amazing rant about Pedro being the real bum in this story.

Match#4Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs Terry Gunn & Curt Hennig
More bad shit from these two, so of course it goes forever and of course they'll be winning the tag titles by years end. Fuck man.
1/2*

Match#5 Rick Martel & Tony Garea vs Rodz & Siccluna
Decent showcase for the champ, but nothing amazing as we've come to expect from them. Sunset flips does it
*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
August 15th, 1981
Hambrug, PA

We get a cool new intro video with a dance theme to it.

Match#1 Pedro Morales vs Jack Carson
you know the deal, and i have too much love for the 3 people reading this to bore you any more. C R A B D O E S I T
1/2*

At ringside, Patterson interviews McGraw. His neck is still died and whatnot, and he's waiting to hear from the doctors if he can continue or retire.

Match#2 Greg Valentine w/Grand Wizard vs Steve King
Beautiful stuff from our hero for a few minutes, and you can't ask for a better squash guy than Hammer. Dude just knows how to use his time better than anyone else. Figure Four kills the kid
**1/2

Post match, Hammer locks it in again just to fucking do it, and the kid screams for mercy and it fucking rules. HAMMER BREAKS THE KIDS LEG AND CHEERS AT THE SOUND OF IT. FUCK YEAH, HAMMER. He laughs his balls off as the kid gets taken out on a stretcher, and it's one of the coldest moments ever. Just an evil motherfucker on another level of evil and mean.

Patterson interviews them at ringside and is big mad at them for doing such a cool thing. GW says he couldn't be prouder of Hammer anymore than he is right now, and they had to show the world what's in store for them if they're stupid enough to try and cross him. Hammer talks about when he broke Strongfakes leg and when he had Backlund beat all those years ago, and he's the man to end the reign.

Match#3 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Angelo Gomez
Awesome shit from the best beach bum in wrestling. Patterson says because of Muarco spitting on the title last week, the championship committee will strip him if does it again, and Pat says he might have to step up himself if he keeps it up. Tombstone ends it
**

They replay the tag champs squash from last week

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
August 22nd, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Killer Khan & King Kong Masca w/Freddie Blassie & Lou Albano vs King & Sodo
OH GOD. I guess they figure if one can't get over on their own, maybe they can do it together? Horrible as you'd imagine, and i'm suddenly happy i don't have any more house shows for this year... Khan wins with his terrible knee.
1/2*

Match#2 Andre The Giant vs ??
Andre murders another two helpless fools and it's the best. All WWF shows should just be him breaking people half like a God. Everything is mean and horrific as possible and without a care in the world, and i love it so. ANDRE USES THE FULL FORCE OF HIS ASS TO SEND A MAN ALL THE WAY OUT OF THE RING. AMAZING. Big Boot and a slam ends the fun
*****

At ringside, Patterson is with Muarco and GW. Pat tries to stir up trouble between Hammer and Don by saying Wizard thinks Hammer is better and should go after Backlund. GW rightly shuts that bullshit down and says they have a plan as the three of them, and it's no one else's business but theirs. Muarco again rants about the chants and it's not anything new, so let's move on.

Match#3 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Angelo Gomez
Don focuses on the back this week which is a cool change, and Pat wonders if he's weakening the spine for a backbreaker. Love that so much. He does a lot of cool work to it and it's nice to see him change things up and not get lazy like others might. Splash ends it
**

Match#4 Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs SD Jones & Curt Hennig
fuck no

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
August 29th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Tom Finch
it's a crime that Don is gone by years end until 83, but until Vince buys the company and locks them all down, this is the way of things. Awesome shit as always, this time going after the neck for a few minutes. He hits him with the spike and then the Tombstone
**

Ar ringside, Patterson again interviews McGraw about his injured neck. He announces his neck hasn't healed the way it was meant to, so he has to get surgery and will be out indefinitely. He's very sad and whatnot, and it's a good angle if nothing else.

They replay a Morales squash from a few weeks ago for some reason.

They then replay Hammer's interview after he broke the jobbers leg.

Match#2 Johnny Rodz vs Roberto Soto
Soto is another random powerhead they found and he's not very good at all. Really dull guy and Rodz can only do so much with a complete nothing. The highlight is when the timekeeper fucks up and rings the bell too early and they have to restart the match, and Vince gets very mad on air. Soto wins with a bad cradle
1/2*

Match#3 Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs Shy & DeNucci
Oh lord, take me now

Match#4 Tony Atlas vs Mike Masters
This episode is a test and i might just fail it. Bruno is on commentary and LOVES Tony for obvious reasons, and it really adds to Bruno being full of fucking shit about his hate of steroids, instead he was just being a big old bitch. Atlas wins with a bad running splash.
1/2*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
September 5th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Pedro Morales vs Jose Estrada
Jose got a haircut and looks like Charles Bronson, and it's a cool choice of him to do that as i really enjoy Bronson. i don't enjoy Pedro however, so yeah. Bad match as always, but that's the deal.
1/2*

Match#2 Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs DeNucci & King
Horrible stuff again from these lazy turds. It's insane that WWF is going to have the absolute peak of tag divisons in a few years, because holy shit you'd (rightly) think they hate them and only have them because they have to. Loaded boot ends it
1/2*

Match#3 Killer Khan w/Freddie Blassie vs Gomez
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Match#4 Rick Martel & Tony Garea vs Johnny Rodz & Siccluna
I have no idea if these are new matches or if it's the same being show over and over again like a timeloop. IT'S FINE AND I AM NOW DEAD. Sunset flip ended it, but maybe it never ended.
*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
September 12th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

Match#1 Don Muarco w/Grand Wizard vs Terry Gunn
DON RUNS RIGHT AT HIM AND DROPS HIM WITH A GROSS GUTWRENCH AND BEATS THE FUCK OUT OF HIM WITH UGLY STRIKES AND MORE AWESOME THROWS. He keeps kicking the hell out of him and it gets super hard to watch and i have no idea why he's this angry, but i love it. He hits a nasty motherfucker of a tombstone then the splash to win. One of the best squashes ever. Goddamn
**3/4

Match#2 Pedro Morales vs Johnny Rodz
PLEASE RUN A NEW SQUASH, GUYS. IT'S OK TO USE OTHER WRESTLERS, I PROMISE. Rodz does his thing for maybe the 100th time this year, and it's perfectly goddamn fucking fine. Pedro is also in this match, and he's not fine. i hope you're fine, though. Pedro wins with a backslide.
*

At ringside, Patterson interviews him. He says Rodz is a tough wrestler and he gives him credit for making him better, and he respects him.

Match#3 Greg Valentine w/Grand Wizard vs Lee Wong
Hammer can't touch Don's earlier squash, but he's still a violent mean son of a bitch, and that's enough for me. Figure Four does the deed after another great one
**

Match#4 Roberto Soto vs Jerry Johnson
Soto is not very good as we spoke about last time. He's way better suited to being a job guy, not the actual star they want to seemingly push. He looks winded real fast and all his offence is laboured as a result, so it's even worse than it might have been. He wins with a dropkick
3/3*

Match#5 Masked Executioner vs Steve King
ME is Ron Shaw under a mask, and i have no idea why he was picked of all the job guys to be in this spot, but good for him. This is only 60 seconds and he wins with a Neckbreaker, so even weirder on that front.
1/2*

 

[BigVanDonnie]

WWF World Champion; Bob Backlund- Since 20/2/78
WWF Intercontinental Champion; Don Muarco- Since 20/6/81
WWF Tag Team Champions; Rick Martel & Tony Garea- Since 25/7/81

WWF All Star Wrestling
September 19th, 1981
Hamburg, PA

To open the show, Pat is with McGraw again. He announces his retirement from this great sport as his neck is dead and stuff. See you in 6 months, dude.

Match#1 Greg Valentine vs Terry Gunn
Hammer goes after the legs right away and we get these great close up shots of them bending in nasty ways, and it's a cool thing i wish they would bring back. Hammer decides he's tired of trying to break his legs, so he just stops and pounds the shit out of him for a while, including some nasty clubs that send the kid to the hardwood floor face first!!! Hammer slaps the FF back on to win
**

Post math, Hammer teases breaking the leg, but he decides not to and just taunts over his dead body.

Match#2 Roberto Soto vs Jose Estrada
This nonsense continues, sadly. Jose takes him to the mat to test him, and Soto offers nothing there, and he actually looks a bit lost when he grabs onto a leg and doesn't seem to know what to do. Just a guy in the wrong spot for unknown reasons. Jose does his best to carry him and make up for it, but this is very much a lost clause type deal, so fuck it. Also, turns out Soto was partners with Invader 1, the guy who killed Brody, so reallyyyyyyyy fuck this dude. Dropkick ends it
1/2*

At ringside, Patterson interviews Khan and Blassie. "We broke Andre's leg, he's a pussy" etc.

Match#3 Mr Fuji & Mr Saito w/Lou Albano vs Wong & Gomez
Bad showing for the guys, very happy they'll be holding the tag gold soon. Love to see them being rewarded. Boot load does it
1/2*