Wasn't going to make this thread, but I feel compelled

[Dolph'sZiggler]

Impact 9/13

So as expected Impact opens with the champ, as it should. Unfortunately, he is talking about Aces & 8s :eww: . He quickly transitions to Hardy, who comes out and as I said they would, things quickly turns into a verbal dick sucking fest. Aries and Hardy are bros, I get it, but that doesn't make for an interesting feud. Aries is going to be playing a bit of a tweener role I would imagine, just being more aggressive on the mic and that sort of thing... so maybe he can save the build for the BFG Main Event.

Insert: Bully Ray : . He is playing up the 'he went easy on Hardy' angle, which is fine. You knew Bully would be able to spin it, as he is unable to be buried.

Hardy wants to fight Bully? Why would I want to see this again?

"Don't take that shirt off, don't take that shirt off!" : Hilarious. That was sort of an awkward way to end the opening segment, but I realize they have to work around Hardy's awfulness on the mic.

Again though, why have this match 4 days later? Nobody wants to see it.

__________

X Division Championship match? :dafuq: . I never expected this. Dutt and Ion again??? Why TNA why? I hate when companies do this. So far we have two rematches from Sunday Night. How exciting.

Good match (really liked the false finish on the double foot stomp when Ion put his foot on the rope at 2.5), I like Ion a lot, but can we get him in another feud please? and stop treating the X Division title like it is the United States title? There was really no point to ending the feud with King. I thought it was awesome and had some momentum. They could have made that a 3 PPV match series with King winning the belt.

__________

Daniels having a conversation with himself as Hulk Hogan was awesome. The stipulation Hulk gives about Singles matches and rematches... was not awesome. I hate when the tag team champions have singles matches. It just screams 'hey look how weak our tag division is' in my eyes. I'm also so tired of this AJ/Daniels shit that I honestly can't put it into words :blown:

__________

GET IN JAIL FOR DOING WHAT? GETTING EVEN?? SCREW YOU HOGAN!!
(we need a Roode smiley)

SHIT FACTOR
SHIT FACTOR
SHIT FACTOR

Oh how I've missed you Roode. Swag on lvl 100. Roode might be the best mic worker in pro wrestling right now. Here comes the pissed off cowboy wearing a skull cap. He's beating up Bobby arker: . They don't even show the conclusion of the brawl, all we get is Tenay 'it took like a dozen of em to break it up!!' is:

__________

AJ vs Kaz

Since Kaz's pairing with Daniels, he has become a new favorite of mine. I've always enjoyed his ring work, but I love his character now as well and he is hilarious to go along with his stellar ring work.

WTF @ that spot on the apron. I don't think I've ever seen anything like that. Kaz is nuts to agree to that, but he is fine. Dude bumps like a poor man's Ziggler. I thought he might be dead there.

Now we get AJ crashing into the rail and then taking a monkey flip onto the floor lol. This is great. AJ goes over clean. okay. More Angles/Styles vs Daniels/Kaz. Something new would be nice :silva:

__________

Joey Park. Killing it like mf ALWAYS. I re-watched that 30 second promo 3 times. Left us with a killer cliffhanger as well. <3<3. I'm so proud to be the ORIGINAL Park Mark. NOw he's a body guard :dawg: . Hilarious

__________

Dear god fuck Jeff Hardy for putting his title on the line. Why do faces always do that shit? "Oh yea bro, I'll put up ::insert something of value here:: for no reason at all, with nothing to gain! Why not?"

Awful booking. I won't complain if Bully actually wins though, I just don't think that would happen.

__________

HULK! DUDE! BROTHER!

This promo sucks lol. I'm actually excited to see Aces & 8s. Okay so they continue to 'hint' (as if we don't know) that there is a mole. Probably Bully Ray. And they will show up at the main event tonight.

Not a bad promo from the faceless goon lol. He put Hogan's ass on notice at least. Storyline still hasn't progressed much if at all.

RECAP of this shit? Fuck you TNA. That's gay

__________

Chavo vs Daniels

If Daniels loses this match I'll be upset. I'm not upset at that outfit Christy Hemme is wearing :maybe:

Taz talking about desperate cornered rats for about 5 minutes is the only notable thing I took away from this match. He needs to gtfo. He is even worse than Tenay.

Wait, Chavo won? : . TNA just shamelessly plugs in Chavo basically marketing it as 'hey, Eddie's dead, here's Chavo!'. How many allusions can they make to Eddie? Chavo invented lying, cheating, and stealing? gtfo. And of course they end the segment with 'Shades of the late, great Eddie Guerrero!'. I like Chavo, but this is pathetic and Chavo is damn sure no Eddie.

__________

Gut Check preview for next week. This shit has taken on a new meaning; because every time I see a Gut Check segment I feel like I'm going to puke. Fuck this garbage.

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'We Will hear from Tara'---- why? ity1:

If James Storm and Bobby Roode have a match next week for OFN I will seriously flip my shit

If Tara isn't here to make out with Brooke than I don't want to see this. Well, here comes Brooke, so step 1 is complete I guess : . Tessmacher was on SI.com?? Damn. That's nice coverage :OO

D'awwwwwww. Tara is so proud. PLZ LEZ OUT NOW. She loves her! IT'S TIME TNA. UNLEASH THE LESBIAN ANGLE. May I? YES YOU MAY TARA.

'Best friend'- just drop the code. We can all read between the lines. They hugged.. come on.. grab her ass! Wow, nothing. What a bullshit segment.

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Lmao, I spoke too soon. Tara heel turn! Awesome. fuck her up! Widow's peak dat bitch! 2: . Thank you Tara. <3. Finally the KO's division is somewhat interesting again

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Dixie?? ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Go away. D Lo Brown!! Yes

ROFLMFAO. Hogan's bro ran with a bad crew in Oakland. My hood is so gangsta :ryan:

D Lo aside, this segment was corny and shitty.

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Bully vs Hardy

1 elongated Jeff Hardy entrance to open the show was enough for me..

Better match than I expected thus far. The crowd thinks Bully sucks, which I find to be preposterous.

After I praised the match for being OK, it got boring. Oh look, Hardy wins. Yawn, shocked. :swagger: (yes I know it won't actually show up)

__________

Positives:

-Roode, Bully, and Park are all 10/10 when they are on my screen
-X Division Title match at least keeps the division on TV
-Tara heel turn
-Good match w/ Kaz & AJ as well as Kaz/Daniels hilarious backstage antics

Negatives:
-Filler episode. Nothing advanced, we got rehashed matches from the PPV, and mostly the same old shit. Considering BFG is a month away, that is bullshit
-No Samoa Joe. fuck that
-No advancement in the Aces & 8s angle (of course not)
-Everything about Chavo in TNA, from going over Daniels to the way they portray him
-No :ryan:

Overall: Mediocre episode of Impact, I would say below average by their standards. It felt to me like they were just spinning their wheels this week making us wait on something to matter.

 

[Lacky]

I always like reading these, I was also glad they turned Tara heel, I was calling it as soon as Miss Tessmacher came out. Like you say it makes the knockout division a little easier. Which is nice I suppose. tunga:

 

[Stopspot]

Very mediocre episode indeed. A lot was said but nothing of note happened

 

[Arrow1]

Mediocre TNA is till > WWE. ity:

 

[Stopspot]

Mediocre TNA is till > WWE. ity:

NXT this week blew both TNA and RAW out of the water.

 

[Arrow1]

NXT this week blew both TNA and RAW out of the water.

I don't watch NXT anymore.

 

[Dolph'sZiggler]

NXT this week blew both TNA and RAW out of the water.

But only like 12 smarks, 8 of whom live in their mother's basements, care about NXT.

Everyone knows what he means by WWE. WWE to most people = Raw & SD, but mostly just Raw

 

[Rysenberg]

Everyone knows what he means by WWE. WWE to most people = Raw & SD, but mostly just Raw

And Smackdown had Daniel Bryan TAP OUT to Sheamus which is just pitiful. Seriously, they build him up to be a submission specialist and have him tap to Sheymoose and Sheena?

Fuck this company :

 

[Stopspot]

And Smackdown had Daniel Bryan TAP OUT to Sheamus which is just pitiful. Seriously, they build him up to be a submission specialist and have him tap to Sheymoose and Sheena?

Fuck this company :

To be fair Bryan looked strong coming out of that. He didn't tap out immediately but actually struggled for a while and almost had his hand on the ropes.

 

[Rysenberg]

To be fair Bryan looked strong coming out of that. He didn't tap out immediately but actually struggled for a while and almost had his hand on the ropes.

I didn't watch. As soon as I figured out that Sheamus was going to win via that move I turned off, disgusting.

 

[Stopspot]

I didn't watch. As soon as I figured out that Sheamus was going to win via that move I turned off, disgusting.

Bryan did not look weak in that match at all. His and Kane's segments were gold as well.

 

[Rysenberg]

Bryan did not look weak in that match at all. His and Kane's segments were gold as well.

I'm not saying he looked weak, but kayfabe (and non-kayfabe) wise it's just a piss take that a so called "submission specialist" taps out to some gimmicky shit from Cena and Sheamus.

Oh and I did enjoy the backstage segs again, just hope they don't overdo them.

 

[Dolph'sZiggler]

Bryan did not look weak in that match at all. His and Kane's segments were gold as well.

Stopspot is trying to rival Crayo for his excuse making for WWE. NAH BRO IT'S TOTALLY COOL THAT BRYAN TAPPED TO SHEAMUS ON SMACKDOWN.. HE ALMOST DIDN'T TAP, SO YOU KNOW, THAT'S COOl!

 

[Crayo]

But only like 12 smarks, 8 of whom live in their mother's basements, care about NXT.

Everyone knows what he means by WWE. WWE to most people = Raw & SD, but mostly just Raw

NXT is aired in over 60 countries, it's becoming like the biggest IWC thing now too.

This episode was boring and actually reminded me of RAW. Of course it's still better than RAW because there's still more good, but they're slipping into old annoying habits. The tag team division is fucking horrid atm, as is the X-Division -- even if they redeemed themselves slightly this episode. Two rematches from the PPV I just "paid" for, how does that make the customer feel? Nothing was built in this episode at all either. Recently you could never accuse TNA of filler as it wasn't so long ago that EVERY segment felt important and worthwhile watching, I used to struggle finding piss breaks and food breaks but now I can find plenty.

Not sure how it's changed so much. Aries is going to have to be extra extra special in his role as champ to get me remotely interested in Hardy/Aries. If it's constant dick sucking then I will not give one single piece of crap.

Bully can't be buried no but he can sure as hell be irrelevant and that's what he seems at the moment. Ofc his promos still keep me interested no matter what as he's god damn gifted on the mic, but what as a fan do I expect from Bully apart from jobbing? Also, why no Joe? He's a semi-finalist in BFG but doesn't appear on the impact after.

Roode/Storm is the top dawg atm. I forgot to even mention aces & eights, that's how much I hate that storyline. Hate to be this dampened by TNA, maybe it is because we expect so much after their product a month back, or maybe we're all wrong and the episode was amazing.

 

[Dolph'sZiggler]

^Thank you for recapping 90% of what I said in my review. I liked the way I said it better.

Also I predicted that this episode would be a flop based on what happened at No Surrender. TNA has backed themselves into some corners booking wise with the end of the BFG Series and this aces & eights BS being the feature of the show leading into BFG. I'm wondering how much of these they really thought out.. if they just try to throw a bunch of shit together for BFG it will be incredibly obvious and painful to see.. but at this point I could see it happening.

TNA will bounce back from this though, you can bet your ass about that. They were doing basically perfect for so long that you have to expect a step back every now and again