Ever get that gayass Rob Tommy song Stuck in your head?
that "Lets See How Much We've Cum'ed?!?!...I...Ba-Leave-The Whoa-World is Cum'ing to tha-ground...well, I guess we're gonna Find out....well Lets See how far we've ka-cum'ed.....lets see who we jizz'ed hard on...":scooter:
etc.-etc.-etc......
So To Sum Up the Inspriational words of those rhymes-floating around in my Kickass-Skull, I kind've been feeling Nostaglic-lately(ala bumping old threads/watching oldschool home-videos/etc.) and like...
:in_love: I ma-miss tha-old dayz of marking out for-shit like...
"Oh My Gawd...whats this red-box mean?!"
:eatme: and stuff...
But Since like-a sincere-jizzmeister such as myself can't be down for long, instead my long-brown-cock got up and Shot-at-The Ceiling, and as it fell from the sky-it landed in PubeStashe's mouth while he was shouting out the new "If you know...now you don't"-christiana-cage-catchphrase...
so like...
Have-ya-ever felt like jerking off, but only to stop beforehand cause you feel like doing the "Right-Thing" and not jerking it...:xmas:
then a Kum-Kardashian image pops-up in yo-head:darthvader: thus causing you no-choice but to whack-it into your little-trash can that you've got in your room....near the tv-closet-computer area...ya-know...that little corner....aka, what I call the "Cum-Corner" :sport_boxing:
so'z like...
"Step in My Soul, Look into my Face, as I begin to Spamify!!!" -disturd's new two-ticket-sellout concert song...SpamIfy.....
its part of their pussy ass-anti-war rock-tour....
Land of a 1000 Lies....more like
land of a 1000 gayass songs...
haha!
basically...
whats more anti-rock then a gayass "Please don't War" tour?!?!
seriously...that shits for smurfs, not for rockers...
thats where disturd/GunsNvag's/ those gaywad-dimweeds that sing that Chop-suey song...System of a Dumb...
they like...used to rock til they started to put on tubesocks on their dicks during concerts...
who wants to go to an "OZZFEST" only to see some guy's cock in a sock?
seriously...I ain't going to that shit...
so,since we've got no lives and ain't got shit to do...lets-get-it-on with the show shall we?!
:Smilie:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Intro To Show 13:
So'z Been Macking Lately like a ni'gga in the nostalgelic-mood, and shit...just to see how the landscapes changed.....so from a clueless-kid from wisconsin to a clueless teenager with a computer from Wisconsin, I look back on my year long journey to only find myself sitting here by myself at the house (2am in the morning) and out of boredom, I decide to make myself a Spam-Sandwiche so I can serve-it to you all...
SO ya-All-CAN :eatme: injoy the talking-spam-sandwiche....
tastes great with pubes in it...
So to Sum up this introduction...
If You're not living on the edge of insanity, then you're fat-smurf-ass is hogging up too much homo-room for my world!!!:angry2:
And to all that are willing enough to Come On Board The CUM-RIDE-WITH KENFAN!!!!...
ontiac_black: "I promise not to touch your penis."
............and away-we-go on with the show!!!!!
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List of What's Popping For Today's Tittie-Topics:
-Mystery Of The "Tampoon":
-Cum'ing Soon Catergories:
-KenFan's Currently Loving..?:
-Who/What I whack off most about?:
-Interview, with Ladyhotrod/peepshow/y2jasmine/greatone:
-PPV review:
-Random Rant on a Member:
-KenFan's Reviews on Earlier-KenFanShows(episodes 1-3 reviewed):
-Questions4theKennies:
-Interaction with Kaedon:
-PussyParagraphs2Sum'UpThe Stuff:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Detective KenFan investigates the mystery-of the "Tampoon"?:
Ni'gg'a-Narrorator(probably pussy ass morgan-freemen): "It Started as a day that began with a bunch of fag-ass pussy-penguins walking around and shit...then a bunch of gayass-glaciers melted and killed all the penguines....this pissed off several elite-environ'mental-people.....who then decided to call upon the help of the heriocally-determined-defiant-Detective From another 'Rectum....KENFAN!!!!"
*scene opens up with penguine-pubes(the head master of the penguin-population)*
Penguine-Pubes: "Hey Sa-sir....we request your help...we hear that you are a complete badass and don't take no shit, and that you're thee-asskicker of asskissers...can we aplore you to consider helping us?"
*kenfan pops up from under his desk, where he was nailing a few dozen-dorito-flavored-dikes*
Detective KenFan: "Yea-yeah...whatever...fuck, I'll (kenfan notices, that he's talking to a penguien with pubes on its face)....ohh-ick!..what-the-fuck!?...hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!"
Penguien-Pubes: "Now....hey-now?!....I'm serious...ya-helping us or not?"
Detective KenFan: "hmmm...sure?!...I guess....quick question thou.."
Penguine-Pubes: "...ok then...ask me."
Detective KenFan: "You-The Bad Guy from them Butterflymen movies?...cause if so then I ain't helping yo ass then, cause a gayass villian by the name of Durk Turkey already compared me to that Jimmy-The Clown from them buttman movies...and I don't think thats a cool-comparison...ya-heard what I meaning?"
Penguine-Pubes: "Why-so-serious?"
Detective KenFan: "SHut-The-Fuck-Up with that Brown-Clown-Bullshit!!!...yo-ass wants my help...then yo ass gotz-it!"
*after several hours of hardwork, KenFan begins interrogating several Ne'gro-Children from up the street*
Detective KenFan(good cop): "So...we hear you unfortunate-ni'gg'ers think you're innocent...huhh?!"
Famou$ 187: "Man...the fucks this bullshit?!?!...what am I doing here...I ain't done nothin!!!...let-me go!?!"
Detective KenFan(badcop): "Ohhh-yeah!?!?...Well I call Bullshit-on that!!!...wanna know why?!?!...cause I can Smell The fear in your ass!!!....You probably whack off to tim allen vacuming-kitty-litter outta-yo homeboy's ass, while tim does that "Hurrrh!?!?"-dumbass home improvement sound that allen does...that "Hurrh!?!?"....thus-yo-ass is Guilty!!!!"
Famou$: "man......can i call bail?"
Detective KenFan(goodcop): "nope!...you're a ni'gger...automatically-can't call bail...cause yo'-ass is going straight to jail....hopefully they won't jizz-on you too much when you're behind bars...cause I heard Gardz is waiting specfically for you...Famou$...if that is your real-ne'gro-name..."
*another officer pops up in the room*
Officer-Hickens: "Yo-KenFan...We've got a tip about some trickstars going around poisening them Dolphins!!!"
Detective-KenFan: "ohh-damn....is they some Dickless-dolphins or something?!?!"
Officer-Hickens:".....uhhh?....sure?!..I guess....I dunno, probably..."
Detective-KenFan: "hmmm?!?!"
*At The Beach*
Detective-KenFan: "well-well-well...hopefully we can duct-tape these-dolphin's dicks back on.....before-its too late..."
(a national-army band begins playing that "Salute2dead-dudes" song)
Detective-KenFan: "They were Defiant-Donkey-Dumping-Dolphins....and they may have become dickless-in the end...but they still kept -their CUM!!!!...and GAWDAMMIT!!!!...Thats What Matters...cuz if you can't cum-then you can't have a babie's muma!!!!"
*After a day's long of hard work,KenFan returns back to his local-rez....runs outt've mountain-dew, thus the journey to his cousin's house so as to get some soda-pop begins...*
Several of The KenFannies: "we're off to see the cousin!!!....The Wonderful Cousin-of-KenFan!!!!"
KenFan: "hellz-yea!!!"
(rev theory's "Gimmie-hellyeah" song begins playing)
Ni'gger'narrorator: "as kenfan entered his beloved cousin's yard, he could hear several loud Moaning and Grinding sounds within the immediate-distance...He began walking slowly-and-cautiously....he decided not-to enter the house from within the door, but to instead, interject himself into the current-situation, by going-around back and popping-in-a peak from his cousin's window.....as he got up close to the window, a snake'ishly-lubed-up Ziplock-bag'ish Thing came-flying towards kenfan, where it smacked-him upside the head, in between the eyes.....KenFan fell backwards, and landed hard on the ground...He got up quickly to re'collect what had happened...He noticed the "Thing" that held several milkish'ly white substance in it
....he picked it up.... and examined it."
KenFan: "so this is a Tampoon-ay?!"
Ni'gger-Narrorator: "Thus Solving the Crime of The Tampoon-mystery".
*X-File's Theme song begins playing as the Detective-credits begin to roll*
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cum'ing Soon Catergories:
-A KenFanShow 14?(possibly in the works).
-Another PussyPoundingReports?(its summer, I can't see why-not.)
-KenFan Conspiraceys? (their-are plenty of things that I'm suspicious about).
-FlameWar Thread againest the "Reject-Forum"?(I ain't Durk_Turkey-so'z HellzNo!)
-Any Spams(probably)
-Any Flames(yep)
-Any Lame-asses on this forum(*cough* CHUCK!!! *cough*)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
KenFan's currently-loving?:
Movies: "anything with airforce amy...:in_love: "
music: "that Airbourne song Runnin'wild...reminds me of cum'ing hard!"
tv: "Smackdown!!!!"
people: "I was born with a lack of love fo-smuckz of shit-stains...ha!"
etc: "What the fuck does E-T-C. mean?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Who/What I whack off to the most?:
Tarvis-wearing a jcpenny bag....:in_love:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ken-Canned Slimmed-Table-Interview:
-The QUESTIONS ARE REAL!!!
-THE PEOPLE/MEMBERS ARE REAL'er!!!!!!!
-BUT, THEIR ANSWERS ARE HEAVILY EDITED!!!!!
So,Welcome to thee-KenFanTalk-Show!!!!
Basically, a show within a show(whoa...) , some truly-Ground Breaking Bullshit here!!!....It'll mezmerize you!!!...
(Lights!Cameras!KenFan!!!)
The Host/KenFan: "well, welcome to the show ya' loyal-suckass busta-pa-dars!!! I sure Hope you homo'z didn't accidently jizz-on your way in here!!....Cause we've got several guests today,
including thee-lovely PEEPSHOW(chessarmy claps)!!!....
and LADYCockROD(osama boo's as I stole his joke/durkturkey gets a woody)!!!!........
and GREAT ONE!!!!(no response,as noone cares/knows who he is).....and last but totally-least...
is Y-2-JASMINE!!!!!
(rell hides his love4her, mat gets naked pics of her via-pm's, and a bunch of lazy-ass-latino-ne'groz-get up off their asses to clap as a half-Blue taco-makes its way on stage)
Peepshow: "quite the-lovely-gathering..."
KenFan: "Hey!!!........
shut the fuck up!!!...her father died in vietnam...you-asshole!!!..you'll speak when spoken too-from now on...ya-heard?!"
Peepshow:"....k,"
KenFan: "so...starting with Y2Jasmine; back in the earlier-creative-processing stages in the first-several premature-KenFanShows, you nerdishly-primarily-gained up on me(15 year old at the time), with that whole anti-kenfan bandwagon(which consisted of mostly male-modz in their 20's/30's), who wanted to rid of the forum of the only good-fun thing going for it at the time...and randomly, out of nowhere...you ni'gger'ishly became all faggishly friendly towards me....may I ask why the sudden change in stance from againest me to supporting me?"
(jasmine begins to drool, with no response)
KenFan: "well....hmm!?!....no answers?!?!....seriously...do I need to give yo-geed time to heal up from after the pounding that Kaedon gave you when you wanted him to make yo-pussy feel good?!?!.....should I let you pm' what you're about to say to several admins in hopes that they give you suggestions and shit so that you don't sound like a half-ass Blue mexican-monkey?!?!.......huh!??!"
A-CrossEyed-Jasmine-Rapidly Replies(withRage): "El-TACO!!!!"
KenFan: " What The Fuck!?!..stop-it!...I'm serious......its like, whenever great one goes with something and says something, you randomly-blindlessly follow along like some loyal-sex-slave or some shit like that?!!?...can I ask why?"
*Jas is about to respond, til Greatone enterjects himself into the questioning*
Great One: "Hey-NOW!!!...If you wanna ask someone-something, then ask me!!!"
(KenFan looks over G1's shoulder to see Jas playing with lego-star wars & batman action figures)
KenFan: "what-the-fuck?...is she brain-dead or some shit?!"
Great One: "Not-Entirely....ever since she hit her head with the keyboard, she's needed help from us mods...her mother called up several of the admins of the forums and asked us to help guide her and basically to look after her ,so as to make sure she doesn't get-picked-on.......we write & put together threads and send it to her, so she could post them and call them her own."
KenFan: "ohhh-ha!...and here I was thinking that she was just some random-pussy-poster and shit....so I guess thats why she sounds robotically-Blue most the time...huh...whew...good to know info....thanks for telling me gay-one..."
Great One: "No Problem....."
KenFan: "Well-wait a second?!...why is it that she follows whatever you say and such ,but barely goes with someone like...lets say Cenamark54 or soulpower?....why is it that she kiss-ups to you most the time?"
Great One(giggles before saying): "Lets just say that when hot-braindead pussy like that is on the market for free, then I'm gonna have to take advantage of that and dish out my dick on her dumbass....haha!"
KenFan: "Damn-Great one...ya-one evil-sly-mo-fucka..."
(KenFan K'Top'Pops Great One!!!!)
KenFan: "HA!!!!...sorry,but I can't stand assholes that take advantage of blueberries that can't think or say things for themselves...ya-heard?!?!"
(great one lays comatosed, as jasmine begins staring at a dragon fly)
Y2Jasmine: "It-Smiled at me!!!....huhh!?" (KenFan pats her on the shoulder)
KenFan: "They sure do....they..sure-DO!!!!"
(KenFan shoves jas forward,causing her to go flying outside the window, falling straight down to her death...)
KenFan: "Thats what happens to suck-ass-mo-fuckers that think they can get away with shit-talking tha-KenFanShow....,cause fuck with me once...and I'll get back at you ....one way-or-another....cuz-Fuck-with KenFan, and KenFan will fuck-right back at-cha....wether it be a second, a year, a day...it don't matter!!!...cause at some point KenFan's gonna Fuck With you right-back...and KenFan's gonna fuck with you-real bad....:sport_boxing: !!!"
LadyHotRod: "when do I get to be interviewed?!?!"
KenFan: "never!!!"
Peepshow: "we gonna jam to some sexy-ass-rev-theory yet?!"
KenFan & Ladyhotrod & studio-audience all at once: "NOOOOO!!!!!"
Closing-TalkShow thoughts: "well....I think it flew-by-very smoothly...found the very-positive message that it if you try and kiss-up to some faggish-20 to 30 yearold-nerds a world away by trashtalking a 15 year old's attempt at trying to fit-in a forum full of smurfs, then yo ass ain't getting away with that shit...:scooter: Cuz I'm Cumming-4 you....(not in a sexual way, but in a Comeback way)....so yo-ass better grow eyes in the back of your-buttholes...cuz anyplace-anypost-anywhere, I'll be there......and you shall feel the Wrath of Thee-KENFAN-COMEBACK!!!
....bitches!!!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
PPV-Review:
I'll review summerslam...so go-fuckyourself if you looked forward to a blueberry's review....:3dflagsdotcom_gerna HAHAHHAHAHAHAA!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
KenFan's Random Rant(flame) on a Member:
Well Fuck You smurf-Fun-
Smucks-Of-Shit-Stained-
Pillow-Poonging-NI'gg'Er-Nose- loving-nerdTURDS!!!!!!
ya-think BrianKenderick's Penis-Vein randomly sticks himself in Pepsi-Cans For the injoyment-factor!?!?!?......FUCK-NO!!!!
He Does It For The Penis-Passion!!!
Something you australian-pussys know-nothing about!!!!!'
cause-none of you cunts-can lift weights-like HIM!!!!
I've Known him since second-grade...and this one time, when we were drunk, we both hooked-up our webcams and showed each other our penieses as we both chuckled-and-giggled about how we are such great-friends.....
so-to-sum-this up...
Fuck You Gards!!!...ya-asshole!!!
just-kidding...yo-gangsta....
anyways, back on track...like I was saying..
So-To-Sum-This-Cum-Up...
FUCK YOU SHOWSTOPPER!!!!....
ya-M.Night-Sham'a'long-looking-mo-fucka!!!!
It must be cause of yo-man-musk or something...
but what is it about BKP-V that makes him such a bad member??!
Huhh?!?!...
Is it cause he can actually-jizz-with his weiner!?!?...unlike you!!!?
I don't stick my dick in public-urinals....
so think-twice before ya-hulk-ass-black-buck tooth fuck!!!!!
I bet in prison-break, that you're the one guy that can't even get raped by the other inmates....but'cha can still get-CHECKED!!!!........................
...............BRO!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
KenFan's Reviews of The Earlier KenFanShows(episodes 1-3):
They-probably-sucked...(the first two)
But I liked them the most....
Got me some good-cyber-heel-heat...:darthvader:
The Third one is most notable cause of Durk-Knight's Dare(For me to post it in wwe-discussion)...and for tar'vag''s bitch-fit and my black-ass verbally-whooping-his ass...ya-heard?!?!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Questions4TheKennies!!!!:
Question1: "Have Ya-Injoyed this episode?!?
Question2: "KenFanShow to continue...or to Cancell?"
Question3: "Yo-Views on my 1-year journey here at iwf so far?(including your personnal-participation in several stuff you were involved in with me, etc...)"
Question4: "The Number-13; BadLuck?or Bullshit?!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
KenFan's Interaction with Kaedon:
scene opens up with KenFan peacefully typing in a STAR'bucks with his cup of Cum'ffee and computer.....
its a sunny-nice-misty-morning in wisconsin....
Everyone types along gracefully...
that is until....
That Drunk Asshole Kaedon comes bargining in...
He Begins to go around ruining everyone's lives again(like usual), by spitting on kids, kicking old people, etc.....
Finally, he gets around to KenFan's area in the STARbucks...
Kaedon: "Hey!?!?...does that thing got-a-hemi!?!?"
KenFan4life: "uhh...no, its a dell and its got dial-up."
Kaedon(begins to cockishly-laugh before saying): "Well mines' a HEMI!!!...haha!!!"
KenFan: "nice to hear...congrates."
Kaedon: "Ya-Gawdamn RIGHT!!!"
kaedon begins to walk out....(leaving kenfan somewhat demoralized)
things look kind've down'ish...
that is until, kaedon stops right before he walks outt've the STARbucks....
he stops'N'stands with his head somewhat shaking, as he looks down as he begins to think to himself...he decides to do the right-thing for once, before 're'entering into the coffee shop...
Kaedon:"Hey KenFan...."
young-kenfan(still-demoralized, but with a glee'full glare of youthfulness and hope-in his eyes) raises his head up to turn around and look at kaedon...
KenFan: "yea-kaedon?"
Kaedon tosses his Hemi-Laptop into the air...
KenFan catches it...(all of which happens in somewhat slowmotion).
Kaedon: "she's yours!!!...."
KenFan: "Kaedon...wait!!!"
Kaedon: "yea?!"
KenFan pauses before saying:"Go-Fuck-YO-self!!!...I've never needed no neg'ro'ish laptop....tha-shits for ni'gg'er-nerds!!!"
Kaedon chuckles before grabbing his hemi-laptop back...
Kaedon pats kenfan on the shoulder, before saying several wisconsin-words-of-wisdom; "Now you know what it takes to become a mod...the torch of tietz has been passed onto you.....it is up to you, to lead the next-generation of geeks on these forums...my time has come and passed...it was a beautiful-journey....now it is yours to injoy......as for me, well...I hear that theres a Cook-out somewhere in Shell-Lake....I guess, that I can enjoy-life-outside the net...fly-fly...."
Kaedon disappears as KenFan looks on in wonder of "WTF?!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The end of episode 13
that "Lets See How Much We've Cum'ed?!?!...I...Ba-Leave-The Whoa-World is Cum'ing to tha-ground...well, I guess we're gonna Find out....well Lets See how far we've ka-cum'ed.....lets see who we jizz'ed hard on...":scooter:
etc.-etc.-etc......
So To Sum Up the Inspriational words of those rhymes-floating around in my Kickass-Skull, I kind've been feeling Nostaglic-lately(ala bumping old threads/watching oldschool home-videos/etc.) and like...
:in_love: I ma-miss tha-old dayz of marking out for-shit like...
"Oh My Gawd...whats this red-box mean?!"
:eatme: and stuff...
But Since like-a sincere-jizzmeister such as myself can't be down for long, instead my long-brown-cock got up and Shot-at-The Ceiling, and as it fell from the sky-it landed in PubeStashe's mouth while he was shouting out the new "If you know...now you don't"-christiana-cage-catchphrase...
so like...
Have-ya-ever felt like jerking off, but only to stop beforehand cause you feel like doing the "Right-Thing" and not jerking it...:xmas:
then a Kum-Kardashian image pops-up in yo-head:darthvader: thus causing you no-choice but to whack-it into your little-trash can that you've got in your room....near the tv-closet-computer area...ya-know...that little corner....aka, what I call the "Cum-Corner" :sport_boxing:
so'z like...
"Step in My Soul, Look into my Face, as I begin to Spamify!!!" -disturd's new two-ticket-sellout concert song...SpamIfy.....
its part of their pussy ass-anti-war rock-tour....
Land of a 1000 Lies....more like
land of a 1000 gayass songs...
haha!
basically...
whats more anti-rock then a gayass "Please don't War" tour?!?!
seriously...that shits for smurfs, not for rockers...
thats where disturd/GunsNvag's/ those gaywad-dimweeds that sing that Chop-suey song...System of a Dumb...
they like...used to rock til they started to put on tubesocks on their dicks during concerts...
who wants to go to an "OZZFEST" only to see some guy's cock in a sock?
seriously...I ain't going to that shit...
so,since we've got no lives and ain't got shit to do...lets-get-it-on with the show shall we?!
:Smilie:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Intro To Show 13:
So'z Been Macking Lately like a ni'gga in the nostalgelic-mood, and shit...just to see how the landscapes changed.....so from a clueless-kid from wisconsin to a clueless teenager with a computer from Wisconsin, I look back on my year long journey to only find myself sitting here by myself at the house (2am in the morning) and out of boredom, I decide to make myself a Spam-Sandwiche so I can serve-it to you all...
SO ya-All-CAN :eatme: injoy the talking-spam-sandwiche....
tastes great with pubes in it...
So to Sum up this introduction...
If You're not living on the edge of insanity, then you're fat-smurf-ass is hogging up too much homo-room for my world!!!:angry2:
And to all that are willing enough to Come On Board The CUM-RIDE-WITH KENFAN!!!!...
ontiac_black: "I promise not to touch your penis."............and away-we-go on with the show!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
List of What's Popping For Today's Tittie-Topics:
-Mystery Of The "Tampoon":
-Cum'ing Soon Catergories:
-KenFan's Currently Loving..?:
-Who/What I whack off most about?:
-Interview, with Ladyhotrod/peepshow/y2jasmine/greatone:
-PPV review:
-Random Rant on a Member:
-KenFan's Reviews on Earlier-KenFanShows(episodes 1-3 reviewed):
-Questions4theKennies:
-Interaction with Kaedon:
-PussyParagraphs2Sum'UpThe Stuff:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Detective KenFan investigates the mystery-of the "Tampoon"?:
Ni'gg'a-Narrorator(probably pussy ass morgan-freemen): "It Started as a day that began with a bunch of fag-ass pussy-penguins walking around and shit...then a bunch of gayass-glaciers melted and killed all the penguines....this pissed off several elite-environ'mental-people.....who then decided to call upon the help of the heriocally-determined-defiant-Detective From another 'Rectum....KENFAN!!!!"
*scene opens up with penguine-pubes(the head master of the penguin-population)*
Penguine-Pubes: "Hey Sa-sir....we request your help...we hear that you are a complete badass and don't take no shit, and that you're thee-asskicker of asskissers...can we aplore you to consider helping us?"
*kenfan pops up from under his desk, where he was nailing a few dozen-dorito-flavored-dikes*
Detective KenFan: "Yea-yeah...whatever...fuck, I'll (kenfan notices, that he's talking to a penguien with pubes on its face)....ohh-ick!..what-the-fuck!?...hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!"
Penguien-Pubes: "Now....hey-now?!....I'm serious...ya-helping us or not?"
Detective KenFan: "hmmm...sure?!...I guess....quick question thou.."
Penguine-Pubes: "...ok then...ask me."
Detective KenFan: "You-The Bad Guy from them Butterflymen movies?...cause if so then I ain't helping yo ass then, cause a gayass villian by the name of Durk Turkey already compared me to that Jimmy-The Clown from them buttman movies...and I don't think thats a cool-comparison...ya-heard what I meaning?"
Penguine-Pubes: "Why-so-serious?"
Detective KenFan: "SHut-The-Fuck-Up with that Brown-Clown-Bullshit!!!...yo-ass wants my help...then yo ass gotz-it!"
*after several hours of hardwork, KenFan begins interrogating several Ne'gro-Children from up the street*
Detective KenFan(good cop): "So...we hear you unfortunate-ni'gg'ers think you're innocent...huhh?!"
Famou$ 187: "Man...the fucks this bullshit?!?!...what am I doing here...I ain't done nothin!!!...let-me go!?!"
Detective KenFan(badcop): "Ohhh-yeah!?!?...Well I call Bullshit-on that!!!...wanna know why?!?!...cause I can Smell The fear in your ass!!!....You probably whack off to tim allen vacuming-kitty-litter outta-yo homeboy's ass, while tim does that "Hurrrh!?!?"-dumbass home improvement sound that allen does...that "Hurrh!?!?"....thus-yo-ass is Guilty!!!!"
Famou$: "man......can i call bail?"
Detective KenFan(goodcop): "nope!...you're a ni'gger...automatically-can't call bail...cause yo'-ass is going straight to jail....hopefully they won't jizz-on you too much when you're behind bars...cause I heard Gardz is waiting specfically for you...Famou$...if that is your real-ne'gro-name..."
*another officer pops up in the room*
Officer-Hickens: "Yo-KenFan...We've got a tip about some trickstars going around poisening them Dolphins!!!"
Detective-KenFan: "ohh-damn....is they some Dickless-dolphins or something?!?!"
Officer-Hickens:".....uhhh?....sure?!..I guess....I dunno, probably..."
Detective-KenFan: "hmmm?!?!"
*At The Beach*
Detective-KenFan: "well-well-well...hopefully we can duct-tape these-dolphin's dicks back on.....before-its too late..."
(a national-army band begins playing that "Salute2dead-dudes" song)
Detective-KenFan: "They were Defiant-Donkey-Dumping-Dolphins....and they may have become dickless-in the end...but they still kept -their CUM!!!!...and GAWDAMMIT!!!!...Thats What Matters...cuz if you can't cum-then you can't have a babie's muma!!!!"
*After a day's long of hard work,KenFan returns back to his local-rez....runs outt've mountain-dew, thus the journey to his cousin's house so as to get some soda-pop begins...*
Several of The KenFannies: "we're off to see the cousin!!!....The Wonderful Cousin-of-KenFan!!!!"
KenFan: "hellz-yea!!!"
(rev theory's "Gimmie-hellyeah" song begins playing)
Ni'gger'narrorator: "as kenfan entered his beloved cousin's yard, he could hear several loud Moaning and Grinding sounds within the immediate-distance...He began walking slowly-and-cautiously....he decided not-to enter the house from within the door, but to instead, interject himself into the current-situation, by going-around back and popping-in-a peak from his cousin's window.....as he got up close to the window, a snake'ishly-lubed-up Ziplock-bag'ish Thing came-flying towards kenfan, where it smacked-him upside the head, in between the eyes.....KenFan fell backwards, and landed hard on the ground...He got up quickly to re'collect what had happened...He noticed the "Thing" that held several milkish'ly white substance in it
....he picked it up.... and examined it."
KenFan: "so this is a Tampoon-ay?!"
Ni'gger-Narrorator: "Thus Solving the Crime of The Tampoon-mystery".
*X-File's Theme song begins playing as the Detective-credits begin to roll*
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Cum'ing Soon Catergories:
-A KenFanShow 14?(possibly in the works).
-Another PussyPoundingReports?(its summer, I can't see why-not.)
-KenFan Conspiraceys? (their-are plenty of things that I'm suspicious about).
-FlameWar Thread againest the "Reject-Forum"?(I ain't Durk_Turkey-so'z HellzNo!)
-Any Spams(probably)
-Any Flames(yep)
-Any Lame-asses on this forum(*cough* CHUCK!!! *cough*)
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KenFan's currently-loving?:
Movies: "anything with airforce amy...:in_love: "
music: "that Airbourne song Runnin'wild...reminds me of cum'ing hard!"
tv: "Smackdown!!!!"
people: "I was born with a lack of love fo-smuckz of shit-stains...ha!"
etc: "What the fuck does E-T-C. mean?"
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Who/What I whack off to the most?:
Tarvis-wearing a jcpenny bag....:in_love:
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Ken-Canned Slimmed-Table-Interview:
-The QUESTIONS ARE REAL!!!
-THE PEOPLE/MEMBERS ARE REAL'er!!!!!!!
-BUT, THEIR ANSWERS ARE HEAVILY EDITED!!!!!
So,Welcome to thee-KenFanTalk-Show!!!!
Basically, a show within a show(whoa...) , some truly-Ground Breaking Bullshit here!!!....It'll mezmerize you!!!...
(Lights!Cameras!KenFan!!!)
The Host/KenFan: "well, welcome to the show ya' loyal-suckass busta-pa-dars!!! I sure Hope you homo'z didn't accidently jizz-on your way in here!!....Cause we've got several guests today,
including thee-lovely PEEPSHOW(chessarmy claps)!!!....
and LADYCockROD(osama boo's as I stole his joke/durkturkey gets a woody)!!!!........
and GREAT ONE!!!!(no response,as noone cares/knows who he is).....and last but totally-least...
is Y-2-JASMINE!!!!!
(rell hides his love4her, mat gets naked pics of her via-pm's, and a bunch of lazy-ass-latino-ne'groz-get up off their asses to clap as a half-Blue taco-makes its way on stage)
Peepshow: "quite the-lovely-gathering..."
KenFan: "Hey!!!........
shut the fuck up!!!...her father died in vietnam...you-asshole!!!..you'll speak when spoken too-from now on...ya-heard?!"
Peepshow:"....k,"
KenFan: "so...starting with Y2Jasmine; back in the earlier-creative-processing stages in the first-several premature-KenFanShows, you nerdishly-primarily-gained up on me(15 year old at the time), with that whole anti-kenfan bandwagon(which consisted of mostly male-modz in their 20's/30's), who wanted to rid of the forum of the only good-fun thing going for it at the time...and randomly, out of nowhere...you ni'gger'ishly became all faggishly friendly towards me....may I ask why the sudden change in stance from againest me to supporting me?"
(jasmine begins to drool, with no response)
KenFan: "well....hmm!?!....no answers?!?!....seriously...do I need to give yo-geed time to heal up from after the pounding that Kaedon gave you when you wanted him to make yo-pussy feel good?!?!.....should I let you pm' what you're about to say to several admins in hopes that they give you suggestions and shit so that you don't sound like a half-ass Blue mexican-monkey?!?!.......huh!??!"
A-CrossEyed-Jasmine-Rapidly Replies(withRage): "El-TACO!!!!"
KenFan: " What The Fuck!?!..stop-it!...I'm serious......its like, whenever great one goes with something and says something, you randomly-blindlessly follow along like some loyal-sex-slave or some shit like that?!!?...can I ask why?"
*Jas is about to respond, til Greatone enterjects himself into the questioning*
Great One: "Hey-NOW!!!...If you wanna ask someone-something, then ask me!!!"
(KenFan looks over G1's shoulder to see Jas playing with lego-star wars & batman action figures)
KenFan: "what-the-fuck?...is she brain-dead or some shit?!"
Great One: "Not-Entirely....ever since she hit her head with the keyboard, she's needed help from us mods...her mother called up several of the admins of the forums and asked us to help guide her and basically to look after her ,so as to make sure she doesn't get-picked-on.......we write & put together threads and send it to her, so she could post them and call them her own."
KenFan: "ohhh-ha!...and here I was thinking that she was just some random-pussy-poster and shit....so I guess thats why she sounds robotically-Blue most the time...huh...whew...good to know info....thanks for telling me gay-one..."
Great One: "No Problem....."
KenFan: "Well-wait a second?!...why is it that she follows whatever you say and such ,but barely goes with someone like...lets say Cenamark54 or soulpower?....why is it that she kiss-ups to you most the time?"
Great One(giggles before saying): "Lets just say that when hot-braindead pussy like that is on the market for free, then I'm gonna have to take advantage of that and dish out my dick on her dumbass....haha!"
KenFan: "Damn-Great one...ya-one evil-sly-mo-fucka..."
(KenFan K'Top'Pops Great One!!!!)
KenFan: "HA!!!!...sorry,but I can't stand assholes that take advantage of blueberries that can't think or say things for themselves...ya-heard?!?!"
(great one lays comatosed, as jasmine begins staring at a dragon fly)
Y2Jasmine: "It-Smiled at me!!!....huhh!?" (KenFan pats her on the shoulder)
KenFan: "They sure do....they..sure-DO!!!!"
(KenFan shoves jas forward,causing her to go flying outside the window, falling straight down to her death...)
KenFan: "Thats what happens to suck-ass-mo-fuckers that think they can get away with shit-talking tha-KenFanShow....,cause fuck with me once...and I'll get back at you ....one way-or-another....cuz-Fuck-with KenFan, and KenFan will fuck-right back at-cha....wether it be a second, a year, a day...it don't matter!!!...cause at some point KenFan's gonna Fuck With you right-back...and KenFan's gonna fuck with you-real bad....:sport_boxing: !!!"
LadyHotRod: "when do I get to be interviewed?!?!"
KenFan: "never!!!"
Peepshow: "we gonna jam to some sexy-ass-rev-theory yet?!"
KenFan & Ladyhotrod & studio-audience all at once: "NOOOOO!!!!!"
Closing-TalkShow thoughts: "well....I think it flew-by-very smoothly...found the very-positive message that it if you try and kiss-up to some faggish-20 to 30 yearold-nerds a world away by trashtalking a 15 year old's attempt at trying to fit-in a forum full of smurfs, then yo ass ain't getting away with that shit...:scooter: Cuz I'm Cumming-4 you....(not in a sexual way, but in a Comeback way)....so yo-ass better grow eyes in the back of your-buttholes...cuz anyplace-anypost-anywhere, I'll be there......and you shall feel the Wrath of Thee-KENFAN-COMEBACK!!!
....bitches!!!"
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PPV-Review:
I'll review summerslam...so go-fuckyourself if you looked forward to a blueberry's review....:3dflagsdotcom_gerna HAHAHHAHAHAHAA!!!!!
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KenFan's Random Rant(flame) on a Member:
Well Fuck You smurf-Fun-
Smucks-Of-Shit-Stained-
Pillow-Poonging-NI'gg'Er-Nose- loving-nerdTURDS!!!!!!
ya-think BrianKenderick's Penis-Vein randomly sticks himself in Pepsi-Cans For the injoyment-factor!?!?!?......FUCK-NO!!!!
He Does It For The Penis-Passion!!!
Something you australian-pussys know-nothing about!!!!!'
cause-none of you cunts-can lift weights-like HIM!!!!
I've Known him since second-grade...and this one time, when we were drunk, we both hooked-up our webcams and showed each other our penieses as we both chuckled-and-giggled about how we are such great-friends.....
so-to-sum-this up...
Fuck You Gards!!!...ya-asshole!!!
just-kidding...yo-gangsta....
anyways, back on track...like I was saying..
So-To-Sum-This-Cum-Up...
FUCK YOU SHOWSTOPPER!!!!....
ya-M.Night-Sham'a'long-looking-mo-fucka!!!!
It must be cause of yo-man-musk or something...
but what is it about BKP-V that makes him such a bad member??!
Huhh?!?!...
Is it cause he can actually-jizz-with his weiner!?!?...unlike you!!!?
I don't stick my dick in public-urinals....
so think-twice before ya-hulk-ass-black-buck tooth fuck!!!!!
I bet in prison-break, that you're the one guy that can't even get raped by the other inmates....but'cha can still get-CHECKED!!!!........................
...............BRO!!!!
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KenFan's Reviews of The Earlier KenFanShows(episodes 1-3):
They-probably-sucked...(the first two)
But I liked them the most....
Got me some good-cyber-heel-heat...:darthvader:
The Third one is most notable cause of Durk-Knight's Dare(For me to post it in wwe-discussion)...and for tar'vag''s bitch-fit and my black-ass verbally-whooping-his ass...ya-heard?!?!
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Questions4TheKennies!!!!:
Question1: "Have Ya-Injoyed this episode?!?
Question2: "KenFanShow to continue...or to Cancell?"
Question3: "Yo-Views on my 1-year journey here at iwf so far?(including your personnal-participation in several stuff you were involved in with me, etc...)"
Question4: "The Number-13; BadLuck?or Bullshit?!"
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KenFan's Interaction with Kaedon:
scene opens up with KenFan peacefully typing in a STAR'bucks with his cup of Cum'ffee and computer.....
its a sunny-nice-misty-morning in wisconsin....
Everyone types along gracefully...
that is until....
That Drunk Asshole Kaedon comes bargining in...
He Begins to go around ruining everyone's lives again(like usual), by spitting on kids, kicking old people, etc.....
Finally, he gets around to KenFan's area in the STARbucks...
Kaedon: "Hey!?!?...does that thing got-a-hemi!?!?"
KenFan4life: "uhh...no, its a dell and its got dial-up."
Kaedon(begins to cockishly-laugh before saying): "Well mines' a HEMI!!!...haha!!!"
KenFan: "nice to hear...congrates."
Kaedon: "Ya-Gawdamn RIGHT!!!"
kaedon begins to walk out....(leaving kenfan somewhat demoralized)
things look kind've down'ish...
that is until, kaedon stops right before he walks outt've the STARbucks....
he stops'N'stands with his head somewhat shaking, as he looks down as he begins to think to himself...he decides to do the right-thing for once, before 're'entering into the coffee shop...
Kaedon:"Hey KenFan...."
young-kenfan(still-demoralized, but with a glee'full glare of youthfulness and hope-in his eyes) raises his head up to turn around and look at kaedon...
KenFan: "yea-kaedon?"
Kaedon tosses his Hemi-Laptop into the air...
KenFan catches it...(all of which happens in somewhat slowmotion).
Kaedon: "she's yours!!!...."
KenFan: "Kaedon...wait!!!"
Kaedon: "yea?!"
KenFan pauses before saying:"Go-Fuck-YO-self!!!...I've never needed no neg'ro'ish laptop....tha-shits for ni'gg'er-nerds!!!"
Kaedon chuckles before grabbing his hemi-laptop back...
Kaedon pats kenfan on the shoulder, before saying several wisconsin-words-of-wisdom; "Now you know what it takes to become a mod...the torch of tietz has been passed onto you.....it is up to you, to lead the next-generation of geeks on these forums...my time has come and passed...it was a beautiful-journey....now it is yours to injoy......as for me, well...I hear that theres a Cook-out somewhere in Shell-Lake....I guess, that I can enjoy-life-outside the net...fly-fly...."
Kaedon disappears as KenFan looks on in wonder of "WTF?!"
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The end of episode 13
:laugh: