SD starts off with a Punjabi Peace Offering. We get a bunch of Indian dancers and Khali along with some guy talking like Apu. The talking guy says The Great Khali is a man of peace and he doesn’t want to fight The Big Show. TBS comes out and Khali offers up his gifts. First some sacred water, that looked really brown, like Khali took a shit in it. Next, Big Show gets a chicken. A cock, if you will. It’s funny because it sounds like that’s what TBS is sucking on when he’s talking. Anyway, the third gift is a goat, so he can always have goats milk, and he will never be thirsty. I don’t know about you, but if I had to drink sand or goats milk, I’d drink the sand. TBS says he I overwhelmed. He says he can’t put into words how he feels, so he is going to show it to Khali. Then…WHAM, one punch and the Punjabi Freak goes down. That is a hell of a right cross!
Segment Rating: **
Comments: Nice acceptable segment for a show. I thought it was funny, but not knee slapping. I also like how they are actually using Khali for what he SHOULD be used for, to put others over.
MnM2k8 vs. The Redneck & The Reject
Christ, how many times are we going to get this god damned match!? Before the match, we get more footage from “The Dirt Sheet.†It really does get funnier and funnier each time I see it, and it really makes them hateable. Shannon starts out with Morrison, and both men show off their athleticism but Johnny M takes over. We get some great heel work from Morrison who taunts Jimmy on the apron by saying “Yeah that’s why you’re still a virgin.†Just LMAO. The Miz tags in but Shannon gets the advantage and tags in Jimmy. He comes in and hits a sweet dropkick/splash combo. Jimmy tags Shannon back in after some more offense, which included a nice kick combo. Shannon hits a slingshot tope’ and continues to work on Miz. The Miz manages to get the advantage again and tags in Morrison. Miz hits that really awkward looking backbreaker Heidenreich used to use for his finisher, but kept Shannon’s back bent over his knees as The Shaman Of Sexy hits a slingshot elbow. That is what we call a modern twist on an old favorite. The Hart Foundation and the Demolition used to use a move just like that a lot. Moore tags in Yang who gets the best of Morrison and we get some more great offense. Back in comes Moore who gets a nearfall and it all breaks down. Miz tags in and we get Morrison getting tossed out by Shannon after Morrison takes out The Wang. Miz hits a reverse neckbreaker and a gay looking pin for the win.
Winners: MnM2k8
Match Rating: ***
Comments: What a match! I will say I was pleasantly surprised by this match. I thought this was just going to be your basic fare from these guys but man was I wrong, and I am damn glad I was. Great double teaming, great action, great pacing, great heel work, it wa just great all around. The only thing I ask now is WWE, PLEASE get some more face tag teams. We only have the champs, Londrick, and Cryme Tyme on Raw, and Moore/Yang, and Jesse and Festus on Smackdown. That leaves Sanlito, Cade/Murdoch, MnM2k8, The Edgeheads, Big Daddy V/Mark Henry, Deuce and Domino, and The Highlanders. Really just one, maybe two more face tag teams on SD would do the trick!
Edge Takes a Day Off
For the whole show, we get these segments showing Edge and Vickie Guerrero at a spa. They are getting their nails, getting massages, a facial (you know there are many Divas Id like to give a facial to but Vickie isnt one of them), and finally a romp in the bed with strawberries and whipped cream. Ugh. But still, Edge is a fucking premadonna, so points for him.
Finlay w/ Hornswaggle vs. Matt Striker
Wooooooooooooooo its time for our weekly dose of comedy from Finlay and Hornswaggle. The Fin man comes out to the happier Irish music, which I’m sure pissed SP off. Finlay starts out beating the tar out of the younger, quicker, Matt Striker. Striker gets some offense in but it was always fleeting as Finlay is just too tough for him. Striker had his head under the bottom rope at one point and Hornswaggle got him with a super soaker, lol. Later, Striker is on the outside and Horny has a bucket. He throws it at Striker and its only confetti. Hornswaggle then hands Matt an umbrella to which he says “What is this, Mary Poppins?†and swats it away. The Leprechaun grabs it and opens it. Matt looks confused but then turns to meet Finlay throwing a bucket of water on him. Heh. Back in the ring and Striker takes over again but Hornswaggle comes in from behind and hits him with a blow up shalayleigh. Striker sarcastically says “OW!†and grabs it form Hornswaggle. The ref asks Matt what he’s doing with it and takes it from him to toss it out. When Striker turns around, Finlay drills him with the REAL shalayleigh and gets the win.
Winner: Finlay
Match Rating: **
Comments: Funny shit. I actually don’t know what they are going to do next, but I cant wait to see!
Victoria comes out and introduces her new best friend Nattie Neidhart. I guess they are like buddies now. I wonder how close they are? They then show some clips of who is one of the most under rated wrestlers of all time, Jim Neidhart. Nattie says that is her dad but this isnt about him, its about her.
Michelle McCool vs. Victoria
This was your standard women’s match. It had pretty good intensity, but that’s about all it had. Nattie distracted Michelle allowing Victoria to get a roll up and win using tights.
Winner: Victoria
Match Rating: *1/2
HBK and Batista: Face to Face
We are going to get a match between these two men at Backlash. And it appears if, FINALLY, the WWE are once again acknowledging the brand split as Cole is trying to push Smackdown loyalty for Batista all night. Batista comes out and says he doesn’t like how HBK has gotten to where he is, by fucking other people over. HBK says he did do that, but he’d a different man now. These two are really kicking it up a notch in the promo department, especially Mr. O_O. At the end of the promo, it gets really tense. As HBK leaves he goes for a superkick but Batista moves. Batista then goes for the Batista Bomb and HBK gets out of it. HBK then scampers away laughing. Oooo this is going to be good.
Segment Rating: **1/2
Vladimir Kozloff vs. A Jobber
Ok, I’m starting to like (hate) this guy. But really, he’s very slow and lumbering in the ring. And he’s a judo/sambo kinda guy. If we have learned anything from Bad News Brown (who was a Judo master) is that you can be good at something like that and suck at wrestling. I’m going to reserve judgment though.
Winner: Vladimir
Match Rating: *1/2
Matt Hardy vs. Chuck Palumbo
MVP joins us out on commentary for this one, and he quickly establishes that he REALLY doesn’t like “The Coachâ€. To be plainly honest, I don’t remember much about this match because it wasn’t that special. I was much more content to listen to MVP on commentary than watch the actual match. From what I could tell, it was fairly back and forth. The end came out of nowhere as the man who WILL NOT DIE hits a twist of fate.
Winner: Matt Hardy
Match Rating: **
Comments: Fire Chuck, NOW!!
The Undertaker vs. Festus (w/Jesse)
Before the match I was talking to PeepShow on IM. And I posed the question, “How is Undertaker going to deal with…*ring* RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRR†and my answer came quickly and swiftly as Undertaker unleashed a hell of a big boot on the goober. This match was almost exclusively back and forth as Taker really had no idea how to handle Festus for most of the match. Whatever Taker did, the Cornfed Colossis was there to take it and just keep coming. Old School, the big boot, the legdrop on the apron, he took it all and just kept coming. He was like fucking T-1000. Imagine Festus walking up to you “Have you seen this kid?†AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (That was a Waynes World moment for all of you YOUNGINS out there.) In the end, Taker went to the only thing that he could to beat Festus, the choke. But even THAT didn’t really beat him as Festus doesn’t tap! But another ref comes in and determines Festus is out. Holy shit man. I love this guy even more now. If these guys don’t get at least a tag title run, I will be fucking pissed!
Winner: The Undertaker
Match Rating: ***
Comments: Great match. Great way to end the show, and no Edge running in and spoiling it. I like it!
That’s it for this week. Im sorry it took so long to get this up but my new job is kicking my ass. I didn’t realize SP was such a hardcore reader! Make sure you check out SPs ECW Review because its EXTREEEEEEEEEME! See ya next week!
Segment Rating: **
Comments: Nice acceptable segment for a show. I thought it was funny, but not knee slapping. I also like how they are actually using Khali for what he SHOULD be used for, to put others over.
MnM2k8 vs. The Redneck & The Reject
Christ, how many times are we going to get this god damned match!? Before the match, we get more footage from “The Dirt Sheet.†It really does get funnier and funnier each time I see it, and it really makes them hateable. Shannon starts out with Morrison, and both men show off their athleticism but Johnny M takes over. We get some great heel work from Morrison who taunts Jimmy on the apron by saying “Yeah that’s why you’re still a virgin.†Just LMAO. The Miz tags in but Shannon gets the advantage and tags in Jimmy. He comes in and hits a sweet dropkick/splash combo. Jimmy tags Shannon back in after some more offense, which included a nice kick combo. Shannon hits a slingshot tope’ and continues to work on Miz. The Miz manages to get the advantage again and tags in Morrison. Miz hits that really awkward looking backbreaker Heidenreich used to use for his finisher, but kept Shannon’s back bent over his knees as The Shaman Of Sexy hits a slingshot elbow. That is what we call a modern twist on an old favorite. The Hart Foundation and the Demolition used to use a move just like that a lot. Moore tags in Yang who gets the best of Morrison and we get some more great offense. Back in comes Moore who gets a nearfall and it all breaks down. Miz tags in and we get Morrison getting tossed out by Shannon after Morrison takes out The Wang. Miz hits a reverse neckbreaker and a gay looking pin for the win.
Winners: MnM2k8
Match Rating: ***
Comments: What a match! I will say I was pleasantly surprised by this match. I thought this was just going to be your basic fare from these guys but man was I wrong, and I am damn glad I was. Great double teaming, great action, great pacing, great heel work, it wa just great all around. The only thing I ask now is WWE, PLEASE get some more face tag teams. We only have the champs, Londrick, and Cryme Tyme on Raw, and Moore/Yang, and Jesse and Festus on Smackdown. That leaves Sanlito, Cade/Murdoch, MnM2k8, The Edgeheads, Big Daddy V/Mark Henry, Deuce and Domino, and The Highlanders. Really just one, maybe two more face tag teams on SD would do the trick!
Edge Takes a Day Off
For the whole show, we get these segments showing Edge and Vickie Guerrero at a spa. They are getting their nails, getting massages, a facial (you know there are many Divas Id like to give a facial to but Vickie isnt one of them), and finally a romp in the bed with strawberries and whipped cream. Ugh. But still, Edge is a fucking premadonna, so points for him.
Finlay w/ Hornswaggle vs. Matt Striker
Wooooooooooooooo its time for our weekly dose of comedy from Finlay and Hornswaggle. The Fin man comes out to the happier Irish music, which I’m sure pissed SP off. Finlay starts out beating the tar out of the younger, quicker, Matt Striker. Striker gets some offense in but it was always fleeting as Finlay is just too tough for him. Striker had his head under the bottom rope at one point and Hornswaggle got him with a super soaker, lol. Later, Striker is on the outside and Horny has a bucket. He throws it at Striker and its only confetti. Hornswaggle then hands Matt an umbrella to which he says “What is this, Mary Poppins?†and swats it away. The Leprechaun grabs it and opens it. Matt looks confused but then turns to meet Finlay throwing a bucket of water on him. Heh. Back in the ring and Striker takes over again but Hornswaggle comes in from behind and hits him with a blow up shalayleigh. Striker sarcastically says “OW!†and grabs it form Hornswaggle. The ref asks Matt what he’s doing with it and takes it from him to toss it out. When Striker turns around, Finlay drills him with the REAL shalayleigh and gets the win.
Winner: Finlay
Match Rating: **
Comments: Funny shit. I actually don’t know what they are going to do next, but I cant wait to see!
Victoria comes out and introduces her new best friend Nattie Neidhart. I guess they are like buddies now. I wonder how close they are? They then show some clips of who is one of the most under rated wrestlers of all time, Jim Neidhart. Nattie says that is her dad but this isnt about him, its about her.
Michelle McCool vs. Victoria
This was your standard women’s match. It had pretty good intensity, but that’s about all it had. Nattie distracted Michelle allowing Victoria to get a roll up and win using tights.
Winner: Victoria
Match Rating: *1/2
HBK and Batista: Face to Face
We are going to get a match between these two men at Backlash. And it appears if, FINALLY, the WWE are once again acknowledging the brand split as Cole is trying to push Smackdown loyalty for Batista all night. Batista comes out and says he doesn’t like how HBK has gotten to where he is, by fucking other people over. HBK says he did do that, but he’d a different man now. These two are really kicking it up a notch in the promo department, especially Mr. O_O. At the end of the promo, it gets really tense. As HBK leaves he goes for a superkick but Batista moves. Batista then goes for the Batista Bomb and HBK gets out of it. HBK then scampers away laughing. Oooo this is going to be good.
Segment Rating: **1/2
Vladimir Kozloff vs. A Jobber
Ok, I’m starting to like (hate) this guy. But really, he’s very slow and lumbering in the ring. And he’s a judo/sambo kinda guy. If we have learned anything from Bad News Brown (who was a Judo master) is that you can be good at something like that and suck at wrestling. I’m going to reserve judgment though.
Winner: Vladimir
Match Rating: *1/2
Matt Hardy vs. Chuck Palumbo
MVP joins us out on commentary for this one, and he quickly establishes that he REALLY doesn’t like “The Coachâ€. To be plainly honest, I don’t remember much about this match because it wasn’t that special. I was much more content to listen to MVP on commentary than watch the actual match. From what I could tell, it was fairly back and forth. The end came out of nowhere as the man who WILL NOT DIE hits a twist of fate.
Winner: Matt Hardy
Match Rating: **
Comments: Fire Chuck, NOW!!
The Undertaker vs. Festus (w/Jesse)
Before the match I was talking to PeepShow on IM. And I posed the question, “How is Undertaker going to deal with…*ring* RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRR†and my answer came quickly and swiftly as Undertaker unleashed a hell of a big boot on the goober. This match was almost exclusively back and forth as Taker really had no idea how to handle Festus for most of the match. Whatever Taker did, the Cornfed Colossis was there to take it and just keep coming. Old School, the big boot, the legdrop on the apron, he took it all and just kept coming. He was like fucking T-1000. Imagine Festus walking up to you “Have you seen this kid?†AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (That was a Waynes World moment for all of you YOUNGINS out there.) In the end, Taker went to the only thing that he could to beat Festus, the choke. But even THAT didn’t really beat him as Festus doesn’t tap! But another ref comes in and determines Festus is out. Holy shit man. I love this guy even more now. If these guys don’t get at least a tag title run, I will be fucking pissed!
Winner: The Undertaker
Match Rating: ***
Comments: Great match. Great way to end the show, and no Edge running in and spoiling it. I like it!
That’s it for this week. Im sorry it took so long to get this up but my new job is kicking my ass. I didn’t realize SP was such a hardcore reader! Make sure you check out SPs ECW Review because its EXTREEEEEEEEEME! See ya next week!
