SD starts off with Raw’s Maria. Ok, sure. She says she is here to host the Smackdown DIVA contest. I guess it’s a good idea to get this out of the way first. Mareyse is the DIVA with the least amount of votes this week and she is the first to go. Shocker. I actually thought Victora would be the first. We have an obstacle course, which is kinda like Slaughters boot camp from a few years ago. Anyway, nice little segment.
Segment Rating: **
Nice little interview with Flair and HBK, good set up for their match at Mania. We haven’t seen a “mutual respect†feud in a looong time. This is one of the matches I am looking forward to. I hope Flair wins just to fuck over everyone who “thinks†they know everything.
The Big Show vs. The Redneck & The Reject
Well finally these two guys are in a losing situation. Another effective squash match TBS shows what he can do to guys who are BIGGER than Money Mayweather. Show shows off his power, and even a little speed. The end was good too as he knocked the fuck out of Shannon.
Winner: The Big Show
Match Rating: **
The Miz vs. John Morrison in the final Money In The Bank Qualifying Match
Carlito, Shelton Benjamin, Ken Kennedy, CM Punk, and MVP have already qualified, this is for the LAST spot. I guess we are going to have 7? What the fuck! So much for having Elijah Burke in it. As Cole said, this is an interesting match as tag team championship partners go at it. I swear to christ, if they let Miz in this match, I will throw a brick through my TV. We get some wrestling to start off the match at a quick pace. Miz hits a clothesline off the second rope and John slides out. There is some shithead in the crowd going BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING not 1 minute into the match. I am all about free speech but someone shut that cocksucker up. Let’s not even give the match a chance to start and rip on it. Fuck him. Anyway, Miz locks in a deep, deep headlock but Morrison gets out of it. Miz gets a one legged crap slapped on him but gets to the ropes. Morrison then works over the back and it develops onto a brawl. Morrison hits a nice athletic jackknife pin but gets a 2. Miz gets up and gets his corner clothesline. A little chase on the outside. Back in the match and Miz hits some move I have never, EVER seen before. Wow. I never thought I would be impressed with The Miz. Back spinning heel kick from Morrison leads to his neckbreaker finisher and we have a winner in a very good match.
Winner: John Morrison
Match Rating: **3/4
Finlay cuts a very convincing promo about Horny and JBL. I think he’s channeling some real life “I have kids†emotions.
M.V.P. vs. Batista (No Holds Barred Match for the United States Title)
I seriously think there is some heat on MVP or something because he has had to work with the big stiff for like 5 weeks in a row now. But you cant argue with success. Like it or not, these guys are having the MOTN week after week after week. Batista shows his power to start off but MVP locks in a side face lock. Batista powers ut of it and MVP gets out of the ring. MVP tries for it again but Batista once again is too strong and MVP runs. Batista finally takes over and gets MVP down and hits a stiff fucking boot. And might add, this crowd is fucking hot for Batista. MVP goes for his boot and misses but Batista hits just a club to the neck that drops MVP. MVP is shot off but he reverses it and hits a beautiful belly to belly. Batista goes out of the ring. MVP jumps on him but gets send back first into the rail. Back in the ring and MVP is using his chain to punch and choke out the Animal. Batista powers out but looks weak. Batista goes back on the offensive but MVP drop toe holds him into the corner. MVP exposes the steel and tries to drive Batista into it but Batista counters. We get a power slam and a spinebuster. Outside the ring MVP grabs a chair and uses it but Batista come back throwing MVP back first into the apron and head first into the announcers table. The Animal tries to send Batista head first into the steel post but gets reversed. MVP tries to send Batista’s head into the table but THAT gets reversed. Low blow by MVP and we get a short stall as both men catch a breath. MVP hits a MASTERFUL kick to the temple! And we go to commercial.
Back on SD and Batista hits a GORE GORE GOOOOOOOOOOOOORE on MVP. Back in the ring and he only gets a 2 count. Batista charges MVP in the corner and gets a face full of foot. MVP charges Batista out of the corner and HE gets face full of foot. MVP rolls out and gets a chair slamming Batista with it in the leg. MVP pull up the pad and goes for a DDT but gets backdropped. Batista then uses the chair and it looks like he’s killed MVP. Back in the ring for another 2 count. MVP sends Batista face first into the exposed steel turnbuckle. He then starts leveling Batista’s back with the steel chair. MVP up to the top rope and but Batista catches MVP and sends him flying. When Batista turns around, he is met by the monster Umaga who gives him a Samoan Spike. MVP makes the cover and gets the win. What a hell of a fucking match! The ending, while having a run in, didn’t even matter because it didn’t detract from the match at all.
Winner: MVP
Match Rating: ***3/4
Kane and Jamie Noble vs. Chuck Palumbo and The Great Khali
Chucky and Kane start out with fists of fury. Kane tags in Jamie who hits a cross body from the top. Chuck then tags in Khali who just takes over and just destroys Noble. Kane tries to come in and help but its all moot as Jamie is hit with a Khali Bomb and that’s all she wrote. This was a basic filler match, alright filler, but filler none the less.
Winners: Chuck Palumbo and The Great Khali
Match Rating: *3/4
Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair vs. The Edgeheads in a 3 on 2 Handicapped Steel Cage Match
No pyro for Edge, I think he was expecting it, ha. Vickie comes out before the match and says that she is adding another person to the match, the ECW Champion, Chavo Guerrero. What a cunt. Anyway, this match has CLUSTERFUCK all over it. There is a lot going on so its hard to keep track of. HBK gets backdropped into the cage and Flair gets speared. This is a mugging. HBK is tied up in the ropes and takes a wide open spear. Flair is left all alone with 4 guys. Flair tries to fight back but just cant do it. Flair has been busted open gets lawndarted into the steel. HBK is still tied up and can only watch. Edge goes for the cover but pulls Flair up to continue the punishment. Flair is trying to get back into it, his hair almost soaked with blood. Everyone then starts raking Flairs head on the steel. HBK GETS OUT and starts coming back! I cant believe it. I was expecting Taker to come out. But its short lived a the numbers are just too much. Flair then starts fighting back but once again, its 4 on 2. HBK is upside down and cant move as he takes ANOTHER spear from Edge. Flair is being bounced all over the cage and HBK is getting punished. HBK and Flair FINALLY get a come back. HBK sends EVERYONE into the steel, as Flair turns the match into a 3 stooges routine. Flair and HBK slap on their submissions but Chavo breaks it up. Everyone is down. Edge is going for the door when GONG the lights go out and Taker hits the ring. Edge shits his pants. Ryder, Hawkins, and Chavo all run interference allowing Edge to get the win. SON OF A BITCH!
Winners: The Edgeheads and Chavo Guerrero
Match Rating: ***
Well this was a fucking great SD. This is what it should have been for the past two weeks. Im not saying its too late, but its definitely not as good as it could have been. Lets hope the last weeks of build will be better. MOTN was, AGAIN, MVP vs. Batista. Just great shit. Thanks for reading, make sure you stop by the other columns here in IWF, the guys work really hard, so give them a once over. See ya next week!
Segment Rating: **
Nice little interview with Flair and HBK, good set up for their match at Mania. We haven’t seen a “mutual respect†feud in a looong time. This is one of the matches I am looking forward to. I hope Flair wins just to fuck over everyone who “thinks†they know everything.
The Big Show vs. The Redneck & The Reject
Well finally these two guys are in a losing situation. Another effective squash match TBS shows what he can do to guys who are BIGGER than Money Mayweather. Show shows off his power, and even a little speed. The end was good too as he knocked the fuck out of Shannon.
Winner: The Big Show
Match Rating: **
The Miz vs. John Morrison in the final Money In The Bank Qualifying Match
Carlito, Shelton Benjamin, Ken Kennedy, CM Punk, and MVP have already qualified, this is for the LAST spot. I guess we are going to have 7? What the fuck! So much for having Elijah Burke in it. As Cole said, this is an interesting match as tag team championship partners go at it. I swear to christ, if they let Miz in this match, I will throw a brick through my TV. We get some wrestling to start off the match at a quick pace. Miz hits a clothesline off the second rope and John slides out. There is some shithead in the crowd going BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING not 1 minute into the match. I am all about free speech but someone shut that cocksucker up. Let’s not even give the match a chance to start and rip on it. Fuck him. Anyway, Miz locks in a deep, deep headlock but Morrison gets out of it. Miz gets a one legged crap slapped on him but gets to the ropes. Morrison then works over the back and it develops onto a brawl. Morrison hits a nice athletic jackknife pin but gets a 2. Miz gets up and gets his corner clothesline. A little chase on the outside. Back in the match and Miz hits some move I have never, EVER seen before. Wow. I never thought I would be impressed with The Miz. Back spinning heel kick from Morrison leads to his neckbreaker finisher and we have a winner in a very good match.
Winner: John Morrison
Match Rating: **3/4
Finlay cuts a very convincing promo about Horny and JBL. I think he’s channeling some real life “I have kids†emotions.
M.V.P. vs. Batista (No Holds Barred Match for the United States Title)
I seriously think there is some heat on MVP or something because he has had to work with the big stiff for like 5 weeks in a row now. But you cant argue with success. Like it or not, these guys are having the MOTN week after week after week. Batista shows his power to start off but MVP locks in a side face lock. Batista powers ut of it and MVP gets out of the ring. MVP tries for it again but Batista once again is too strong and MVP runs. Batista finally takes over and gets MVP down and hits a stiff fucking boot. And might add, this crowd is fucking hot for Batista. MVP goes for his boot and misses but Batista hits just a club to the neck that drops MVP. MVP is shot off but he reverses it and hits a beautiful belly to belly. Batista goes out of the ring. MVP jumps on him but gets send back first into the rail. Back in the ring and MVP is using his chain to punch and choke out the Animal. Batista powers out but looks weak. Batista goes back on the offensive but MVP drop toe holds him into the corner. MVP exposes the steel and tries to drive Batista into it but Batista counters. We get a power slam and a spinebuster. Outside the ring MVP grabs a chair and uses it but Batista come back throwing MVP back first into the apron and head first into the announcers table. The Animal tries to send Batista head first into the steel post but gets reversed. MVP tries to send Batista’s head into the table but THAT gets reversed. Low blow by MVP and we get a short stall as both men catch a breath. MVP hits a MASTERFUL kick to the temple! And we go to commercial.
Back on SD and Batista hits a GORE GORE GOOOOOOOOOOOOORE on MVP. Back in the ring and he only gets a 2 count. Batista charges MVP in the corner and gets a face full of foot. MVP charges Batista out of the corner and HE gets face full of foot. MVP rolls out and gets a chair slamming Batista with it in the leg. MVP pull up the pad and goes for a DDT but gets backdropped. Batista then uses the chair and it looks like he’s killed MVP. Back in the ring for another 2 count. MVP sends Batista face first into the exposed steel turnbuckle. He then starts leveling Batista’s back with the steel chair. MVP up to the top rope and but Batista catches MVP and sends him flying. When Batista turns around, he is met by the monster Umaga who gives him a Samoan Spike. MVP makes the cover and gets the win. What a hell of a fucking match! The ending, while having a run in, didn’t even matter because it didn’t detract from the match at all.
Winner: MVP
Match Rating: ***3/4
Kane and Jamie Noble vs. Chuck Palumbo and The Great Khali
Chucky and Kane start out with fists of fury. Kane tags in Jamie who hits a cross body from the top. Chuck then tags in Khali who just takes over and just destroys Noble. Kane tries to come in and help but its all moot as Jamie is hit with a Khali Bomb and that’s all she wrote. This was a basic filler match, alright filler, but filler none the less.
Winners: Chuck Palumbo and The Great Khali
Match Rating: *3/4
Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair vs. The Edgeheads in a 3 on 2 Handicapped Steel Cage Match
No pyro for Edge, I think he was expecting it, ha. Vickie comes out before the match and says that she is adding another person to the match, the ECW Champion, Chavo Guerrero. What a cunt. Anyway, this match has CLUSTERFUCK all over it. There is a lot going on so its hard to keep track of. HBK gets backdropped into the cage and Flair gets speared. This is a mugging. HBK is tied up in the ropes and takes a wide open spear. Flair is left all alone with 4 guys. Flair tries to fight back but just cant do it. Flair has been busted open gets lawndarted into the steel. HBK is still tied up and can only watch. Edge goes for the cover but pulls Flair up to continue the punishment. Flair is trying to get back into it, his hair almost soaked with blood. Everyone then starts raking Flairs head on the steel. HBK GETS OUT and starts coming back! I cant believe it. I was expecting Taker to come out. But its short lived a the numbers are just too much. Flair then starts fighting back but once again, its 4 on 2. HBK is upside down and cant move as he takes ANOTHER spear from Edge. Flair is being bounced all over the cage and HBK is getting punished. HBK and Flair FINALLY get a come back. HBK sends EVERYONE into the steel, as Flair turns the match into a 3 stooges routine. Flair and HBK slap on their submissions but Chavo breaks it up. Everyone is down. Edge is going for the door when GONG the lights go out and Taker hits the ring. Edge shits his pants. Ryder, Hawkins, and Chavo all run interference allowing Edge to get the win. SON OF A BITCH!
Winners: The Edgeheads and Chavo Guerrero
Match Rating: ***
Well this was a fucking great SD. This is what it should have been for the past two weeks. Im not saying its too late, but its definitely not as good as it could have been. Lets hope the last weeks of build will be better. MOTN was, AGAIN, MVP vs. Batista. Just great shit. Thanks for reading, make sure you stop by the other columns here in IWF, the guys work really hard, so give them a once over. See ya next week!
