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The following was sent to us from [MENTION=60]The Linebacker[/MENTION]
Normal go home show alot of talking and not enough wrestling to the PPV showing events of things that happened on the last show. Undertaker showing up, Bruno happy to be outsmarting Ventura and Madden spouting crap all night long.
Show opened with Ventura out in the ring yelling about how Bruno thinks he is so smart and wished that he could look as sexy as him with half a mustache like himself. Ventura went about running at the mouth more about how Shiek is a non factor in the match and that he thinks Shiek has hidden homo tendancies. Just look at how his shoes curl up to a tip (at which point Ventura rubbed his chest some, seemed to be excited), and look how he keeps a nice big burly Russian at his side all the time as well. This screams bed buddies fella so its time to come out of the closet and embrace your inner gay. Join the Gay Gourmets and help us rid the world of this terrible travesty that people think we are. We are human beings just like you looking for love. Shiek comes down with Volkov and tells Ventura that he needs to shut the fuck up fag. He hates Fags and so does Volkov. We just like nice alcohol and destroying bars together that is it. No homo crap going on here and if the PLOW faithful think otherwise they are sadly mistaken. Shiek rambled some about how being gay was against his Muslim heritage and that he will bring the title back to the Muslim world where it belongs around his waist and how he and Volkov will celebrate on a nice bearskin rug...which he hurried up and changed to we will celebrate by killing a bear. Bruno comes out and says all three of them are meant for each other and tomorrow night he will walk out as the reigning champion again.
1st match- Santino vs Eric Young. This match was full of funny moments. Santino pulled out the Cobra and EY ran around the ring and ran under the ring for a moment and when he came out he had a turban on his head and flute. He played the flute and Santino massaged the cobra. Eventually Santino pulled out the win with a spank across EY's ass after a cobra strike. Santino played his air trumpet but went around looking for that flute and yelled something to EY about liking playing flutes and he looks like a master at it. Ryder came out as well and pulled out a pink mic all in glitter and said EY I have something to tell you WOO, WOO, WOO you know it. I am so glad that you took the bait that I put out last week since I am a Master Baiter I will see you at Dismember and you will go down on me, I mean down to me.
2nd Match- Bull buchanon VS Barry Horrowitz- a good little squash match with some offense brought by Barry but ended up going down for the 1,2,3 by the big bull.
Madden came out telling Slick that he needs to announce some of his team because he can't just show up tomorrow without a team. Madden is stomping his foot telling him to tell him. Slick walks out slowly laughing telling Madden to cool down and pull his panties out of a bunch. Madden told him he wears G-strings so there is no bunching you assuming prick. Slick says ok, ok, ok not only do Adonis, Street, and Rico have to deal with Buchanon they also have to deal with the Godfather oh and lets even up the odds some more and make it a 5 on 5 survivor series style match and I have a message for Ryder to shut up with the Woo's because Eric Young is putting the No. 1 contendership on the line so he better man up for once.
Madden tells Slick that he is on and that they better watch themselves and Ryder will be ready.
3rd match. Brian Clark VS Brutus- Brutus tried to tell Clark in the beginning with the right makeup and right hair stylist that he could look sexy and handsome. Clark throttled Brutus and tossed him around for awhile. Brutus grabbed something and blew in Clarks face, it was purple in color with a hint of blue (guess it was eye shadow or something). Brutus gets disqualified, Clark for the Win. Clark tosses Brutus out of the ring into railing and walks out all purple and blue.
4th match: Orlando Jordan VS Superstar Billy Graham. This match doesn't even get started as the Gay Gourmets come out and attack Graham and give him a hooker make over. Slick comes out and say well since you guys want to do this Graham is in the big 10 man match. Madden screams great get the oil out because Orlando Jordan will be in the match as well.
5th match: Bryan Adams VS Johnny B Badd- Johnny on the offense early on and knocks Adams down a few times. Adams storms back but but the match is thrown out when Brutus comes out along with Clark. Both Brutus and Johnny end up taking a PMS from Kronik and they both land in a 69 position on the mat.
Madden comes out again telling Bruno that his time as Champ will come to an end tomorrow but before he addresses that he says he can't wait to spill his load about the 5th member of his team Gay and has decided that it will be Marty Jannetty. Now Bruno please be a doll and clean yourself well because when Ventura gets done with you you will cry like a little baby tomorrow night when its all over so be a good man and shave that horrible chest hair. Bruno comes out behind Madden and tells him he will do no such thing and that all the ladies love his chest hair and to quit hating on him because he is beautiful no on talks about how fat and disgusting you are and since you seem to have all the advantages come the PPV Undertaker will be the special referee to help ensure things go fair and Volkov will be the enforcer to keep your Gay entourage out of the ring along with my friend Black Machismo Jay Lethal. So take that you big swine and he has a message from Slick for you, I am not in this war with you guys but he told me to tell you Warlord. Madden looked a little worried.
match 6: Brooklyn Brawler VS Undertaker- What a debut match for the Undertaker as he demolished Brawler in about 2 minutes of pure beating and finished him off with a tombstone.
match 7: Jay Lethal VS Adrian Adonis-- Well not a great match to end the show but after 19 minutes Adonis gets the victory after he gives Lethal what he call the French Tickler (looked like a sleeper hold but Adonis is kissing them). While Adonis is standing there with his hands raised in the air Kevin Thorne shows up and looks at Adonis and says I am number 5.
Heenan closes the show by saying wait til tomorrow night at Dismember to see what happens and I have just been given word that Jay Lethal and Kanyon will open the show on the pre-show as well. So there you have it. I can't wait to see what happens. What do you think Styker, Matt opens his mouth and Heenen tells him to shut up and just watch he might learn some things come the end of Dismember.
Normal go home show alot of talking and not enough wrestling to the PPV showing events of things that happened on the last show. Undertaker showing up, Bruno happy to be outsmarting Ventura and Madden spouting crap all night long.
Show opened with Ventura out in the ring yelling about how Bruno thinks he is so smart and wished that he could look as sexy as him with half a mustache like himself. Ventura went about running at the mouth more about how Shiek is a non factor in the match and that he thinks Shiek has hidden homo tendancies. Just look at how his shoes curl up to a tip (at which point Ventura rubbed his chest some, seemed to be excited), and look how he keeps a nice big burly Russian at his side all the time as well. This screams bed buddies fella so its time to come out of the closet and embrace your inner gay. Join the Gay Gourmets and help us rid the world of this terrible travesty that people think we are. We are human beings just like you looking for love. Shiek comes down with Volkov and tells Ventura that he needs to shut the fuck up fag. He hates Fags and so does Volkov. We just like nice alcohol and destroying bars together that is it. No homo crap going on here and if the PLOW faithful think otherwise they are sadly mistaken. Shiek rambled some about how being gay was against his Muslim heritage and that he will bring the title back to the Muslim world where it belongs around his waist and how he and Volkov will celebrate on a nice bearskin rug...which he hurried up and changed to we will celebrate by killing a bear. Bruno comes out and says all three of them are meant for each other and tomorrow night he will walk out as the reigning champion again.
1st match- Santino vs Eric Young. This match was full of funny moments. Santino pulled out the Cobra and EY ran around the ring and ran under the ring for a moment and when he came out he had a turban on his head and flute. He played the flute and Santino massaged the cobra. Eventually Santino pulled out the win with a spank across EY's ass after a cobra strike. Santino played his air trumpet but went around looking for that flute and yelled something to EY about liking playing flutes and he looks like a master at it. Ryder came out as well and pulled out a pink mic all in glitter and said EY I have something to tell you WOO, WOO, WOO you know it. I am so glad that you took the bait that I put out last week since I am a Master Baiter I will see you at Dismember and you will go down on me, I mean down to me.
2nd Match- Bull buchanon VS Barry Horrowitz- a good little squash match with some offense brought by Barry but ended up going down for the 1,2,3 by the big bull.
Madden came out telling Slick that he needs to announce some of his team because he can't just show up tomorrow without a team. Madden is stomping his foot telling him to tell him. Slick walks out slowly laughing telling Madden to cool down and pull his panties out of a bunch. Madden told him he wears G-strings so there is no bunching you assuming prick. Slick says ok, ok, ok not only do Adonis, Street, and Rico have to deal with Buchanon they also have to deal with the Godfather oh and lets even up the odds some more and make it a 5 on 5 survivor series style match and I have a message for Ryder to shut up with the Woo's because Eric Young is putting the No. 1 contendership on the line so he better man up for once.
Madden tells Slick that he is on and that they better watch themselves and Ryder will be ready.
3rd match. Brian Clark VS Brutus- Brutus tried to tell Clark in the beginning with the right makeup and right hair stylist that he could look sexy and handsome. Clark throttled Brutus and tossed him around for awhile. Brutus grabbed something and blew in Clarks face, it was purple in color with a hint of blue (guess it was eye shadow or something). Brutus gets disqualified, Clark for the Win. Clark tosses Brutus out of the ring into railing and walks out all purple and blue.
4th match: Orlando Jordan VS Superstar Billy Graham. This match doesn't even get started as the Gay Gourmets come out and attack Graham and give him a hooker make over. Slick comes out and say well since you guys want to do this Graham is in the big 10 man match. Madden screams great get the oil out because Orlando Jordan will be in the match as well.
5th match: Bryan Adams VS Johnny B Badd- Johnny on the offense early on and knocks Adams down a few times. Adams storms back but but the match is thrown out when Brutus comes out along with Clark. Both Brutus and Johnny end up taking a PMS from Kronik and they both land in a 69 position on the mat.
Madden comes out again telling Bruno that his time as Champ will come to an end tomorrow but before he addresses that he says he can't wait to spill his load about the 5th member of his team Gay and has decided that it will be Marty Jannetty. Now Bruno please be a doll and clean yourself well because when Ventura gets done with you you will cry like a little baby tomorrow night when its all over so be a good man and shave that horrible chest hair. Bruno comes out behind Madden and tells him he will do no such thing and that all the ladies love his chest hair and to quit hating on him because he is beautiful no on talks about how fat and disgusting you are and since you seem to have all the advantages come the PPV Undertaker will be the special referee to help ensure things go fair and Volkov will be the enforcer to keep your Gay entourage out of the ring along with my friend Black Machismo Jay Lethal. So take that you big swine and he has a message from Slick for you, I am not in this war with you guys but he told me to tell you Warlord. Madden looked a little worried.
match 6: Brooklyn Brawler VS Undertaker- What a debut match for the Undertaker as he demolished Brawler in about 2 minutes of pure beating and finished him off with a tombstone.
match 7: Jay Lethal VS Adrian Adonis-- Well not a great match to end the show but after 19 minutes Adonis gets the victory after he gives Lethal what he call the French Tickler (looked like a sleeper hold but Adonis is kissing them). While Adonis is standing there with his hands raised in the air Kevin Thorne shows up and looks at Adonis and says I am number 5.
Heenan closes the show by saying wait til tomorrow night at Dismember to see what happens and I have just been given word that Jay Lethal and Kanyon will open the show on the pre-show as well. So there you have it. I can't wait to see what happens. What do you think Styker, Matt opens his mouth and Heenen tells him to shut up and just watch he might learn some things come the end of Dismember.