Kayfabe Precision Tonight - Episode One (Alex Clark and Karl Senn)

[Closed]

The first ever episode of "Precision Tonight" is about to begin. Terra Blaze is sitting in the ring on the Precision sofa. The big electronic sign with Alex Clark and Karl Senn is hanging above the ring. The fans don't know what to expect from the first ever official Precision talk show, but knowing Precision it will have some no so friendly entertainment. Terra Blaze fits in her ear mic and begins to speak

"Welcome to Precision Tonight! My name is Terra Blaze and I will be the co host of Precision Tonight. Tonight our guests are Alex Clark and Karl Senn. These men have been allies all over the independent scene, but it seems like the big time has changed things. Alex Clark feels like he needed to create his own success, but Karl feels like he's been carrying him along for the past 5 years. These men will have a lot to say to each other, but any assaults on this show won't be permitted. This rule was enforced due to our other co host.....He has a history of pissing people off to say. So....please welcome the other host of Precision Tonight!"

Terra stops speaking for the moment as the fans look onto the entrance ramp​

 

[Welsh-Wizard-97]

Well, if fans didn't know what to expect from Precision Tonight before the show started, they damn sure know what to expect now as "Barbie Boy" basts throughout the arena. Now, considering that some ass hole had stolen the Barbie Girl theme from Alice, the fans didn't pop as loud as I would've hoped, but that all changed when the lighting and titantron turned the arena into a 6 year old girl's disco ball and something that looks like the Power Puff Girls cartoon hit the big screen came running out onto the stage from the "Alice Position".

Patrick Young: "He's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Anthony Pederson: "Oh no..."

For the first time in ten months, the most feminine bloke in professional wrestling history (Ignition's Spark division ain't god naff all on this!) is jumping and flailing around on the stage like a Chimpanzee that drank seven too many energy drinks, or as Alice would describe it... Dancing. So, anyway... Alice skips his way down to the ringside area, dishing out high fives and hugs right, left and centre as pink balloons and ribbons begin to fall down from the heavens, which is a little over dramatic for someone who's entire career spans two months and has only had a total of seven matches, like, ever. Reaching the ringside area, he sprints and slides into the ring, gets up and grabs a microphone from this Terra chick and takes a seat.

Alice Xander: "Uh, hi everyone!"

The Precision Universe - who may be slightly muffled by the sheer amount of rubber and helium that is for some reason still falling from the heavens - cheer rather loudly, with some actually yelling "Hi" back... Freaking weirdos.

Alice Xander: "Yeah, so the producers wanted a manly person to be here to protect the chick just in case the big sweaty people get mad and start bashing things... Which is why Terra is my co-host..."

Alice turns to Terra.

Alice Xander: "Your cool with protecting me if shit turns pear shaped, right?"

Terra, confused as all hell, also has a look of pure fear at the fact that she has now been elected as the muscle between the two even though she clearly is the more physically equip to deal with a violent situation than our beloved Barbie. (And also because she has balls... I've seen them )

Alice Xander: Okay, cool. So, Barbie Boys and Barbie Girls, lets not waste any time - since I want to save my time wasting for the actual interview - and bring out my guests, shall we!?"

Terra Blaze: "Don't you mean, our guests?"

Alice Xander: "I thought we agreed that I was to be the professional talker person thingy and you were just here to look scary and hideous so that I don't get mauled when our guests want to kill me?"

Terra Blaze: "I'll have you know that I agreed to no such thing, now if you don't mind behaving yourself while I introduce OUR guests."

Alice Xander: "... Fine, go ahead, man. It's not like I'm the super popular star and you're just a bodyguard that nobody cares about, so you'll obviously do better at introducing things than I would be..."

Alice crosses his arms in a pouting manner as Terra looks on the verge of physical assault... The interview hasn't technically started yet.

Terra Blaze: "I'M NOT A BODYG..."

Breath Terra, breath.
​

@Frosty

​

 

[Closed]

Terra Blaze hides her anger behind her smile and begins to speak once again

"Well, a very interesting return for Alice Xander. Now, we should get this show on the way. Our first guest is the man who cost Karl Senn the Precision championship. Not much is known about his reasons, and this will be his first televised appearance since then. I'm sure he has a lot to say for his actions, and Karl Senn will be happy to finally get Alex Clark out in the open. I would like to remind both men that any assaults won't go without suspension. Now, let's get this show under way. Welcome out Alex Clark!"​

 

[Mr. Thunder]

Alex Clark appears from behind the curtain with a vintage black suit and very high end sunglasses. The reaction to him is mixed of course. Alex walks slowly down to the ring area as his music blasts throughout the arena. He stops at the ring and smiles at Terra Blaze, and he also smirks at Alice Xander. He jumps in the ring and grabs a mic. He takes a few seconds to sit, but he does sit down next to Terra Blaze. Alex Clark begins to speak after a moments of silence

"Well, it is nice to back in Precision! You know, I've been getting asked time and time again on why I did what I did, and I honestly want to answer that, but I just need to take this in first. We have a beautiful lady hosting this show, and I'm not talking about you, Alice."

Alex smirks at Alice once again

"We also have a great setup here tonight. Great lighting and a big ass sign showing off my face. What more could I ask for in my big return? Oh yes, maybe some respect? You all finally get to see the legend that is Alex Clark and you show no reaction? Didn't I earn the right to be cheered after what I did to Karl Senn? No? Well, who gives a crap what you think? After a month of just chilling and thinking about what I was going to do, I decided I should just tell the truth. The truth is that I don't honestly care what any of you think. Look at me! I have the money, I have the looks, I have the girls and I now have the ring skills! I'm not going to chase after some reaction that guys like Ryan Blake, Joseph Diamond, Jack Rogue and Andersen Vega love to have. I'm better and bigger than all of them combined. I will do what I want when I bloody well please."

Alex stands to his feet and begins to look around the sold out arena

"You all don't matter to me! The only person who matters is me, and that's the damn truth. Some may call me a egomaniac, and they're true. My ego is big, but it fits in these $10,000 shoes. It fits damn good, and it looks damn good. I have more money on me than you all have in your bank accounts, and I don't need a money suit to prove it. So, how about you all just sit your asses down and shut the hell up? The true king of Precision is speaking."

Alex Clark begins to laugh as the boos begin to come in like rocket fire. He sits down and puts his arm around Terra Blaze. She is clearly uncomfortable with the current arrangement.

"Now, how about we talk about Karl Senn? I did what I did because I wanted to do it. I was following that jackass around for 5 years, and he always promised me the big time. He always said we would be at the top, but all I saw was him up there. He was keeping me down since he knew the true talent I was. He didn't want me to fly on my own two feet, and for that he made the biggest mistake of his life. I got up one day and I decided it was time to put him down. I knew Andersen Vega would need the help and I was right. I went out there and I took away his chance at defending the title. I mean, what did he even do with the title anyway? He became a internet meme when people didn't know who he was, and truth be told he wasn't all that good. He wasn't that good to begin with, but at the time I needed the help. I needed the guidance. I pulled the trigger when he ran out of those uses, and I took all of those years of frustration into my own hands. It took one move from me with the anger of the past 5 years to put him out cold. Now, I'm just ready to help myself, and that's all that matters. So to answer your questions, I did it because I wanted to do it. I did it because I was sick of Karl Senn, and I did it because it is my time."

Alex Clark throws the mic into Alice Xander's lap which startles him

"MY TIME!"​

 

[Welsh-Wizard-97]

What in the hell did Alice do to deserve a microphone getting thrown a little too close to his as yet unknown privates? Geez, the violence... Anyway, up until he got attacked by audio equipment, Alice was actually playing with one of the balloons (So thanks for ruining his fun, you bastard!). Anyway, Alice picks the mic up.

Alice Xander: "Oh, um... Shit, didn't know that it was my go... Uh..."

Alice gets up off the couch and walks over to the corner nearest to the timekeeper's area and asks him to come over. The timekeeper walks over to the ring and Alice begins to whisper to Mr. Time Guy (Without noticing the fact that he is still holding the microphone to his mouth).

Alice Xander: "Uh, Jim, that's your name, right?

Alice moves the mic to "Jim's" mouth. (He's an idiot...)

Jim: "No, it's Alan."

Alice Xander: "Okay... Jim, what's my line?"

Jim: "It's Alan, and hold on..."

Alan (I know his real name, but Alice is stupid) pulls out a script from his pocket and shows it to Alice. (I wonder if Alice can read?)

Alice Xander: "Okay, lets see here... Blah, blah, blah, Terra genericness... Blah, blah, blah, my entrance... Blah, blah, blah, a very heely good-guy promo and... Ah... Okay, got it. Thanks Jim."

Jim: "IT'S ALAN!"

Alice Xander: "Yeah, yeah!"

Alice walks back over to the couch and sits down... Alice picks up a balloon, unties the bit that looks like a foreskin and then sucks all of the helium out (... Not literally all, but he sucked something outta a foreskin, so just go with it). He begins to speak, sounding like Alvin got kicked in the balls.

Alvin Xander (Get it?): "Tewwa? If you want to feel impowtant, couldcha intwoduce my next guest? Hehehe, my throat tickles when I talk."

Terra looks concerned for Alice's mental health.​

 

[Welsh-Wizard-97]

After a long wait, Alice looks around to see that everyone has legit stopped moving. He looks confused momentarily, not knowing what to do. After another long while of thinking, he gets up off the couch and exits the ring, walking backstage as if nothing happened...

END OF SEGMENT​

 

[Closed]

After a long wait, Alice looks around to see that everyone has legit stopped moving. He looks confused momentarily, not knowing what to do. After another long while of thinking, he gets up off the couch and exits the ring, walking backstage as if nothing happened...

END OF SEGMENT​

Stay off drugs kids

 

[Welsh-Wizard-97]

Stay off drugs kids

Yeah... Alice does have a history of drug usage. I mean, he did slap Reginald in the face after coming to the ring smashed off his head on something. I'll chat with him to see if I can sort it out.