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Jose Tortilla

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So, I went to my high school reunion with a friend of mine who went to school there aswell.

We arrived, we were too early, like an hour or so. So he and I both did our own thing. So I saw a bar, and went to it. So a guy who I didn't know, approached me and said: 'Hey man, how is it going?' So I responded to him: 'Hey dude, fine. How are you?' He: 'Good, I'm exited, let's do a shot!' So I said: 'Woah! Man, I'm having my high school reunion in thirty minutes, I can't do that.' So he said: 'Ah, I see how it is, boy.' Me: 'Hmmff.. Let's do the shot.' So he ordered a double one! Damn it was strong. I thanked him for the drink. Then he said: 'Let's do another one!' Me: 'Oh man, come on! Really? I can't, bro. I'm sorry.' He: 'Ah, I see how it is, son.' Me: 'Arrhhgg.. Let's do another one..' So I took another one. And he kept being a weirdo and buying me shots for like 15 minutes. After all of that, I was completely wasted. I had to look at the ground to coordinate my location.

So my friend and I arrived at the reunion, loud music, lot's of people, but I was drunk.
I sat down somewhere and just chilled down.

Then the principal came out and was like: 'Well hello everyone! Have a great night and keep the party rocking!' So he pulled out a list with lines that said: Who has done this, who has done that, etc.. So he said: 'Who has been out of the country alot?' So everyone on my table who didn't talk to me earlier all pointed at me and were saying: 'Him! Him! Him!' So I didn't want to do it, but in all of a sudden I was on the stage. So he did a little story and handed me the mic. Me: 'Hello everyone, my name is Vinny. I really don't want to say anything stupid, because I've had some drinks earlier.' And in all of a sudden I saw some girls.
Me: 'I see two girls here tonight. Who I asked to the prom. And they said NO!' I was getting a little bit emotional and stuff. The principal tried to pull the mic out of my hands but I was quicker. Me: 'Well girls, it's allright now. Hey, you two got fat!' So one of them said: 'You're fat too!' Me: 'I know I'm fat, but I was fat in high school. Atleast I kept my figure, why couldn't you?'
 

Stopspot

Now I’m a big, fat dynamo!
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Cause this thing has been flying around the internet since at least 2010
 

Jose Tortilla

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Naa you're wrong. It ain't mine. It was for fun. But I also know the real version. Not what you are saying, Avicii.
 

#Heel1

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Anyone who posts below me and says "Cool Story Bro" fucksucks.

Ahhh... I just avoided a bad joke. It feels good.
 

seabs

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Crayo said:
Marvellous narrative sis.

vnDSm.png
 

Jose Tortilla

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:ace: Y'all serious? Friggin did 15 minutes to write this full story.