Michael Cole came out to the ring dressed as Jim Ross, big belly accessory and Barbecue sauce included. Mocking the old voice of the WWE's accent and ankle woes. He threw his hat at Jerry Lawler, and then ducked into “the Cole Mineâ€. Better hope you never see Cornette, we all know what happened to the last guy who mocked Good Ol' J.R.
As Lawler said he’d like to punch Cole’s lights out, “The Game†blasted from the speakers and Triple H walked down the ramp. He spoke of his upcoming match with The Undertaker at WrestleMania as a defining moment of both their careers.
He said he wanted The Undertaker to do him a favor: come to Raw next week so they could stand face to face, and he could look him in the eye and tell him he would lose. But just as Trips is about to pose for the crowd.....Ted DiBiase come out after Triple H’s promo. He said he had become an “afterthoughtâ€, and wanted to make his own opportunity by taking Triple H out on live TV.
Triple H knocked him out of the ring before he could even enter. The Deebs tries to get some offense, but since Triple H is better than the entire roster, he threw DiBiase into the steel stairs and knocked him senseless. The ass-kicking culminates with him using the Pedigree on DiBiase through the announcers’ table. Don't they have Spanish guys to use anymore?
Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne
So Sheamus is the new UNITED STATES CHAMPION OF AMERICA!!! He is a dominant force now, you know, after weeks of losing, he shows off this new found dominance against a guy who beat him cleanly in two minutes. After some Sheamus offense, Bourne takes Sheamus down with a kick, Evan goes up for Air Bourne and misses. It didn’t take long for Sheamus to kick his face off and pin Bourne and take the match.
Sheamus starts speaking, he gets interrupted by Daniel Bryan. He said he wanted to invoke his rematch clause, and he wanted to do it at WrestleMania. Sheamus responded by kicking him in the face and leaving the ring. Guess thats Gaelic for "You're on Fella."
Randy Orton got out of his tour bus, and spoke about how he liked rewatching footage of himself dismantling The Nexus “one punt at a timeâ€. He added that CM Punk “has no idea what sick and twisted really isâ€. Uhhhhhh yeah......I got the gist of it.....You hear voices in your head :snore:
Inexplicably, his promo was followed by a Divas match between Eve and Maryse. As Maryse taunted Eve and repeatedly screamed “Nobody caresâ€, she must be describing every Diva match that WWE broadcasts.
As the match continued, Cole stood up in his box and asked if it could end, since he had another “exclusive†about Lawler. In short order, Eve won, and then came over to Cole’s box and slapped him in the face. So Eve is tired of Cole's shit now too.....This could be interesting.
Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs. Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel
Next, former tag team champions Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov once again battled current belt holders Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel for the 32089472 time this month. But considering WWE has virtually no real tag teams, the constant rematches are never a surprise.
Slater and Gabriel win the match easily, but as The Corre collectively assaulted the losers, Kane and The Big Show came out to exact revenge for what The Corre did to them on SmackDown the previous Friday.
The two giants took out three of The Corre’s four members, but saved the best for last, double chokeslamming Ezekiel Jackson. Talk about killing the heat they just got from beating up the two most dominating figures on Smackdown....But hey, gotta start a match somehow.
John Cena Spoke About The Rock and The Miz
After a recap of what happened to John Cena on the previous week’s Raw, Cena appeared live via satellite from his home. He admitted that he had focused so much on The Rock that he had underestimated The Miz, and said he intended to make history at WrestleMania. How's that? By actually putting someone over?
Michael Cole Provoked Jerry Lawler
After a break, Cole and Jack Swagger pranced around in the ring. Swagger left the ring and stood glaring at Lawler as Cole introduced a replay from the previous week, when Lawler’s son Too Coke Brian Christopher confronted him.
Cole said that Christopher had given him the Lawler Family Photo Album, and showed photos of Lawler’s father while making disparaging remarks. He said both Lawler and his father were “gutless cowards and big old bulliesâ€.
As Cole called Lawler and his family “losersâ€, Lawler left the announcers’ table in a rage, taking Swagger down and running after Cole. But Cole retreated to his cage and Swagger clotheslined Lawler. He then got Lawler in position for Cole to practice his ankle lock. Cole is being booked perfectly here, believable asshole and makes Swagger look like a monster as his bodyguard.
If I was to put my booker hat on, I would incorporate Eve into this nextweek by having Cole beat her for the Diva's title, gives Cole more heat for beating a woman and could be an oppurtunity to bring in Awesome Kong as Cole's muscle for Diva's, since he is constantly shitting on their matches. You get to debut a new star and put Swagger back in the mix after this.
Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison
After a recap of Snooki’s appearance on Raw, her WrestleMania partner John Morrison faced Dolph Ziggler. Trish Stratus supported him at ringside, while Vicki Guerrero and Lay-Cool were in Ziggler’s corner.
Ziggler dominated the early part of the match, but Morrison then knocked him out of the ring into the announcers’ table. Michelle McCool blocked Morrison from rushing out through the ropes, but Stratus took her and Layla down.
An e-mail from the anonymous Raw general manager changed the conditions: it became a mixed tag team match, with Morrison and Stratus facing Ziggler, Lay-Cool, and Guerrero.
After a break, Morrison backed Ziggler into a corner. Layla tagged in, and Stratus dominated the contest until McCool kicked her from outside the ropes.
It all led to Guerrero entering and missing badly, and Morrison tagging in to unload on Ziggler. Meanwhile, Layla knocked Stratus out of the ring, and Ziggler took out Morrison’s legs. He tagged Guerrero in, and she pinned Morrison for the victory.
Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio
After a montage of interviews about Triple H and The Undertaker came a contest billed as a “WrestleMania Rewind matchâ€, pitting Randy Orton against his opponent from WrestleMania XXII, Rey Mysterio.
Mysterio’s mobility gave him an early advantage, but Orton soon took him down and tossed him out of the ring. Orton’s pin attempts failed, and Mysterio fought his way out of Orton’s chokehold.
A failed 619 set up the conditions for Orton to win, but he was interrupted by CM Punk, outside Orton's tour bus. He suggested he was about to attack Orton's wife, luring Orton away from the ring only to attack him with a wrench. Punk blows creepy kisses at Ortons wife, who doesn't look like she knows how to feel as this guy attacks her husband and stares at her all creepily.
After an announcement that The Undertaker had accepted Triple H's invitation to meet him face to face, which seems odd as he's presumably in the darkside and I didn't know they got cell service.
Alex Riley announced he had been rehired by WWE as Vice President of Corporate Communications. He then introduced The Miz.
He turned the logo on his mic over to make the "W" into an "M", and the lights went out for his dramatic redesign of the WWE Championship belt with his revised logo. He made fun of Cena's spinner belt, and said he didn't plan on ever losing his title.
John Cena Confronted The Miz
After his "I'm awesome!" tag line, Cena appeared on the Titantron. Workers took down the set around him to reveal he wasn't live via satellite, but in the arena in Philadelphia. He ran out to the ring to confront The Miz and Riley.
The two of them tried to overpower Cena, but he threw Riley out of the ring and The Miz fled. Riley leapt back in, and Cena put him in a submission hold. As The Miz returned to the ramp, he continued to punish Riley, until the referees broke his hold and The Miz retreated in frustration. Cena is bleeding from something, I don't know what, maybe he flew into a nerd rage and clawed at his face. Since he looked like an angry blueberry when he put Rioley in the STF. Not hating just observating.
Was a good show, considering the big name players like Rock, Austin, Taker and even Cena to a certain extent were not at the show. Just good to know, they don't fall apart when the bigwigs are not there to pick up the slack.
As Lawler said he’d like to punch Cole’s lights out, “The Game†blasted from the speakers and Triple H walked down the ramp. He spoke of his upcoming match with The Undertaker at WrestleMania as a defining moment of both their careers.
He said he wanted The Undertaker to do him a favor: come to Raw next week so they could stand face to face, and he could look him in the eye and tell him he would lose. But just as Trips is about to pose for the crowd.....Ted DiBiase come out after Triple H’s promo. He said he had become an “afterthoughtâ€, and wanted to make his own opportunity by taking Triple H out on live TV.
Triple H knocked him out of the ring before he could even enter. The Deebs tries to get some offense, but since Triple H is better than the entire roster, he threw DiBiase into the steel stairs and knocked him senseless. The ass-kicking culminates with him using the Pedigree on DiBiase through the announcers’ table. Don't they have Spanish guys to use anymore?
Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne
So Sheamus is the new UNITED STATES CHAMPION OF AMERICA!!! He is a dominant force now, you know, after weeks of losing, he shows off this new found dominance against a guy who beat him cleanly in two minutes. After some Sheamus offense, Bourne takes Sheamus down with a kick, Evan goes up for Air Bourne and misses. It didn’t take long for Sheamus to kick his face off and pin Bourne and take the match.
Sheamus starts speaking, he gets interrupted by Daniel Bryan. He said he wanted to invoke his rematch clause, and he wanted to do it at WrestleMania. Sheamus responded by kicking him in the face and leaving the ring. Guess thats Gaelic for "You're on Fella."
Randy Orton got out of his tour bus, and spoke about how he liked rewatching footage of himself dismantling The Nexus “one punt at a timeâ€. He added that CM Punk “has no idea what sick and twisted really isâ€. Uhhhhhh yeah......I got the gist of it.....You hear voices in your head :snore:
Inexplicably, his promo was followed by a Divas match between Eve and Maryse. As Maryse taunted Eve and repeatedly screamed “Nobody caresâ€, she must be describing every Diva match that WWE broadcasts.
As the match continued, Cole stood up in his box and asked if it could end, since he had another “exclusive†about Lawler. In short order, Eve won, and then came over to Cole’s box and slapped him in the face. So Eve is tired of Cole's shit now too.....This could be interesting.
Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs. Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel
Next, former tag team champions Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov once again battled current belt holders Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel for the 32089472 time this month. But considering WWE has virtually no real tag teams, the constant rematches are never a surprise.
Slater and Gabriel win the match easily, but as The Corre collectively assaulted the losers, Kane and The Big Show came out to exact revenge for what The Corre did to them on SmackDown the previous Friday.
The two giants took out three of The Corre’s four members, but saved the best for last, double chokeslamming Ezekiel Jackson. Talk about killing the heat they just got from beating up the two most dominating figures on Smackdown....But hey, gotta start a match somehow.
John Cena Spoke About The Rock and The Miz
After a recap of what happened to John Cena on the previous week’s Raw, Cena appeared live via satellite from his home. He admitted that he had focused so much on The Rock that he had underestimated The Miz, and said he intended to make history at WrestleMania. How's that? By actually putting someone over?
Michael Cole Provoked Jerry Lawler
After a break, Cole and Jack Swagger pranced around in the ring. Swagger left the ring and stood glaring at Lawler as Cole introduced a replay from the previous week, when Lawler’s son Too Coke Brian Christopher confronted him.
Cole said that Christopher had given him the Lawler Family Photo Album, and showed photos of Lawler’s father while making disparaging remarks. He said both Lawler and his father were “gutless cowards and big old bulliesâ€.
As Cole called Lawler and his family “losersâ€, Lawler left the announcers’ table in a rage, taking Swagger down and running after Cole. But Cole retreated to his cage and Swagger clotheslined Lawler. He then got Lawler in position for Cole to practice his ankle lock. Cole is being booked perfectly here, believable asshole and makes Swagger look like a monster as his bodyguard.
If I was to put my booker hat on, I would incorporate Eve into this nextweek by having Cole beat her for the Diva's title, gives Cole more heat for beating a woman and could be an oppurtunity to bring in Awesome Kong as Cole's muscle for Diva's, since he is constantly shitting on their matches. You get to debut a new star and put Swagger back in the mix after this.
Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison
After a recap of Snooki’s appearance on Raw, her WrestleMania partner John Morrison faced Dolph Ziggler. Trish Stratus supported him at ringside, while Vicki Guerrero and Lay-Cool were in Ziggler’s corner.
Ziggler dominated the early part of the match, but Morrison then knocked him out of the ring into the announcers’ table. Michelle McCool blocked Morrison from rushing out through the ropes, but Stratus took her and Layla down.
An e-mail from the anonymous Raw general manager changed the conditions: it became a mixed tag team match, with Morrison and Stratus facing Ziggler, Lay-Cool, and Guerrero.
After a break, Morrison backed Ziggler into a corner. Layla tagged in, and Stratus dominated the contest until McCool kicked her from outside the ropes.
It all led to Guerrero entering and missing badly, and Morrison tagging in to unload on Ziggler. Meanwhile, Layla knocked Stratus out of the ring, and Ziggler took out Morrison’s legs. He tagged Guerrero in, and she pinned Morrison for the victory.
Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio
After a montage of interviews about Triple H and The Undertaker came a contest billed as a “WrestleMania Rewind matchâ€, pitting Randy Orton against his opponent from WrestleMania XXII, Rey Mysterio.
Mysterio’s mobility gave him an early advantage, but Orton soon took him down and tossed him out of the ring. Orton’s pin attempts failed, and Mysterio fought his way out of Orton’s chokehold.
A failed 619 set up the conditions for Orton to win, but he was interrupted by CM Punk, outside Orton's tour bus. He suggested he was about to attack Orton's wife, luring Orton away from the ring only to attack him with a wrench. Punk blows creepy kisses at Ortons wife, who doesn't look like she knows how to feel as this guy attacks her husband and stares at her all creepily.
After an announcement that The Undertaker had accepted Triple H's invitation to meet him face to face, which seems odd as he's presumably in the darkside and I didn't know they got cell service.
Alex Riley announced he had been rehired by WWE as Vice President of Corporate Communications. He then introduced The Miz.
He turned the logo on his mic over to make the "W" into an "M", and the lights went out for his dramatic redesign of the WWE Championship belt with his revised logo. He made fun of Cena's spinner belt, and said he didn't plan on ever losing his title.
John Cena Confronted The Miz
After his "I'm awesome!" tag line, Cena appeared on the Titantron. Workers took down the set around him to reveal he wasn't live via satellite, but in the arena in Philadelphia. He ran out to the ring to confront The Miz and Riley.
The two of them tried to overpower Cena, but he threw Riley out of the ring and The Miz fled. Riley leapt back in, and Cena put him in a submission hold. As The Miz returned to the ramp, he continued to punish Riley, until the referees broke his hold and The Miz retreated in frustration. Cena is bleeding from something, I don't know what, maybe he flew into a nerd rage and clawed at his face. Since he looked like an angry blueberry when he put Rioley in the STF. Not hating just observating.
Was a good show, considering the big name players like Rock, Austin, Taker and even Cena to a certain extent were not at the show. Just good to know, they don't fall apart when the bigwigs are not there to pick up the slack.
