AMA LMS - Bobby Tremblay hypes the Northern Touch (promotes both matches)

[Canadian Dragon]

Public Service Announcement from Bobby Tremblay, Esquire.​

Bobby Tremblay is sitting in his private town car, enjoying a glass of white wine. He's wearing his usual designer suit and his patented rose sunglasses. He puts out a cigar, adjusts his watch and turns to the camera.

It’s come to my attention that the stooges in the back, the so-called heads of creative over at AMA, have decided by stroke of apparent genius to split up the greatest tag team in all of professional wrestling the world has yet to see. Instead of being featured as the main attraction as the deadliest duo in the game, well, they have been relegated to two singles matches in a sad night in Texas.

Bobby gives off an air of arrogance and disgust.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have absolutely zero doubt that The Northern Touch will dominate those matches, it’s not even a fleeting thought in my mind. But that’s not the issue at hand ladies and gentlemen, no.

He puts down his wine glass and takes off his sunglasses, setting them aside.

You see it’s obvious to me that my clients are already being systematically held down by the American-ran AMA. It’s no secret that America is the land of the intolerant and deplorables; so it’s honestly not shocking to me that we would already be treated with such blatant disregard for our talents simply due to our nationality. Outside of a select few individuals, whom I hold at the highest regards, it’s a borderline crime to the wrestling world that my clients, The Northern Touch, would have to demean themselves to such boorish and disgusting matches.

Bobby shakes his head, repulsed at what he's about to say next.

First off, my very good friend, who I’ve mentored since he was in diapers, Johnny Lou, has to face Killer Kandy in an intergender match? What kind of rinky dink backyard promotion are you running here boys? Do you want my protegee to kill someone on national TV? I mean no disrespect to Miss Kandy, either. She is a fine specimen, a phenomenal athlete, and a very important piece in AMA’s women’s division. But to pretend she is on the same level as an international superstar? A man who’s held gold on every continent? I’m sorry but the only conclusion I can make is that they see The Northern Touch as a joke. And that simply will not stand.

Bobby is getting even more physically flustered as he continues, but he uses said emotion to drive his point further.

Then, even more comical. Big, nasty ol Don Marshall, bigger than a brick shithouse and meaner than a junkyard dog. You’re going to put this psychopath in front of poor, weeny little Saus X. My god, the kid can’t even pick a ring name that makes sense. If that doesn’t tell you he’s green, I don’t know what to tell ya bud. It’s going to be a godamn bloodbath, and all Mr. X can hope for is a quick execution. See what I did there?

Bobby rolls his eyes and chuckles at his crappy pun.

And the nail in the coffin! AMA does not even promote my client's entry into the Gold Rush match. Do they intend on losing all of us money to perpetuate this falsehood? That the Northern Touch are not THE main attraction of AMA? This is something that I like to call, fake news. It's a term I came up with, and it's quite apt to describe this scandalous lack of promotional intelligence. If I was in a worse mood, I would even consider suing these amateurs for slander!


All that to say, seriously, who booked this crap? It’s disrespectful to my talents time and health. As you all know, a wrestler’s career can be cut short at any time. Isn’t that right X? Know that in Texas, regardless of AMA ‘s clear discriminatory booking practices, The Northern Touch will rule supreme. We will walk in draped in champagne and women, and leave Last Man Standing as the only team worthy of still being on their feet, draped in golden glory. So come June 15th, don’t blink. You’re about to witness history once again. Good night.

Bobby puts his sunglasses back on, smirks, and takes a long drink of wine as the camera fade to black.

 

[Canadian Dragon]

just fyi: not going to write a second promo for either Johnny or Don, and using this to cross promote both their matches as well and their entry in to gold rush @Cicada . hope that makes sense lol