- Cue the heavy metal music!
- The first main event is a rumble match where you win by grabbing one of two contracts above the ring. Russo would be proud
- Matt Sydal vs. Jack Evans to begin the series. Not too shabby an opener
- Who the fuck is this bald excitable guy?
- "Titles: IWA Champion". That's an endorsement if I've ever seen one
- I miss Jack Evans. Someone go to Mexico and fish him back out of there
- Zack Wylde is on commentary too BTW. METAL!
- Just noticed the turnbuckles are mostly assembled from ducktape. GRUNGE!
- Decent spotty match, sent the exact sort of message the show needed to send
- We preview some of the teams coming up in WSX including DIFH (with Seth Rollins!) and Team Dragon Gate (how did this ever came to happen?)
- Oh god it's Justin Credible, New Jack and Teddy Hart. The quality is just overwhelming.
- I'm not even gonna go over the rules for the main event. Let's just say "spots" and just enjoy the ride
- Justin Credible first, with an ECW chant, Teddy Hart is number two. It's my dream match
- Hart's career highlight is being a Stampede Tag Champ. Sounds about right
- Kaos is next. He's the longest reigning XPW TV champ in history. Lucky him
- I do appreciate the title histories though, attempting to give people a credible background
- Vampiro next. Everyone bumps crazy for him
- After the break, 'Splosions
- During the break, some masked guy was eliminated. Well shucks.
- Next out is Sean Waltman, who will be known as Syxx-Pac today. He sure knows how to manipulate his name for copyright reasons
- "He was in DX, they were badasses bro!" Oh shut up
- Chris Hamrick is here, a former Redneck tag champ (seriously, that's what they put)
- They should have put WRESTLED A BEAR
- And New Jack quickly follows. Damnit
- Hamrick takes a gnarly table bump for a guy his age
- New Jack proceeds to assault a ref. And then dive of a balcony. Welp, that's his whole moveset out
- 'Splosions!
- Next out is Youth Suicide. Not a sausage who this fella is
- He does wrestle whilst wearing a fetching trilby though
- Vamprio needs a bigger vest, his belly is poking out
- More 'splosions!
- He literally fell on fencing to cause that explosion. Deadly ass fencing right there
- Vampiro and Incredible battle for the last contract, as the commentator says it's for "the future of wrestling". No smarky comment needed IMO
- Vamprio gets the contract and we're out very suddenly!
