ECW 1999 Hardcore TV, PPV'S & TNN Reviews

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW Wrestling on TNN: Episode 10
October 29th, 1999
Poughkeepsie, New York

Joey Styles and Joel “I’m luscious, I’m lean, I’m the best they’ve ever seen ‘cause I’m a man among men and a well-oiled love machine” Gertner are in the ring, they welcome us to the show and Joel says this next match is a battle between the only grand slam champions in ECW history.

Taz vs. Sabu (w/Bill Alfonso)
I’ve said this quite a few times, and I’ll say it again. If you put Taz/Sabu in a match and keep it under 7 minutes it’s money and it will always be, hints why Barley Legal worked so well and hints why this is their best match since. This doesn’t have the hatred and viciousness of the PPV match, but they go right at it beating the holy hell out of one another with respect. Great brawl on the floor and on the ramp that takes up half the match, they brawl back into the ring where Sabu does his best to keep Taz grounded but it’s only a matter of time until Taz busts out some Tazplex’s and even trying to rebreak/fracture Sabu’s jaw again. A table is brought in and both men fight to use it, Taz then Alabama slams him through but Sabu gets his hand on the ropes for two, in a rare moment Taz heads up top and goes for the senton but misses. Sabu gets another table and sets it up in the corner. He does the run up the chair poetry in motion, like he did to Rhino last week for only a two count. A 3rd table is brought in he places Taz on it and comes off the top with a leg drop for the win. ***

After the match; The Impact Players run down and beat up Sabu, that leads to RVD making the save. The Impact Players bail, but Sabu attacks RVD and they trade blows. RVD makes the mistake of turning his back to Taz, who locks on the Tazmission. Sabu then putting the boots to RVD while he’s in the hold. He even shoves down Fonzie and Sabu keeps stomping on RVD.

Joey Styles announces that Sign-Guy Dudley is now being called Lou E. Dangerously. He even brought Mickey Whipwreck with him, but he lost to Mike Awesome in his return.

Lance Storm (w/Dawn Marie) vs. Tommy Dreamer (w/Francine)
This is fine, a lot like all their previous matches which I feel has been happening since January. Lots of brawling and moves, I guess Tommy’s back is fine now, as he’s taking some crazy bumps on it and he doesn’t even sell anytime he gets dropped or something hits him on the back. Joey mentions the 2 discs but that’s about it. Tommy brings out a Ladder and places Lance on it on the catwalk he goes to drop an elbow off the middle rope but Lance moves and Tommy’s head, elbow and back crash right on the side. JESUS that looks and sounded nasty. The finish of the match happens when Tommy hits the spicolli driver but Dawn breaks up the cover, that brings Francine in for the cat fight. As the ref is dealing with that Raven slides in and hits Tommy with a DDT, and Lance covers for the win. **

As Raven is leaving Justin Credible runs out and nails Raven in the head with the cane busting him open, Justin then proceeds to beat the shit out of him around ringside and back in the ring. The Impact Players beat him down some more until Dreamer makes the save with a chair.

After a long ass video on the whole Impact Players/Raven, Dreamer feud and Tammy/Dawn we return to the ring; Raven is bloodied in the corner he says he may hate Lance and Justin, but he hates him more. He doesn’t need his help and just like these people that leech of his stardom. Raven attacks Dreamer, but Dreamer lays him out with a DDT. Dreamer declares that Raven’s stuck with him, just as he’s stuck with Raven.

Backstage: Nova is in the dressing room, he says he’s gonna make this short and sweet. His partner got hurt so from now on he’s dedicating his matches to his partner and best friend Chris Chetti, what a smurf.

So during the commercial, the Baldies attack Kash on the floor, while Danny and Roadkill attack Nova in the ring. hat brings out Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten to lay everyone out with chair shots. Miss Congeniality steps into the ring and slaps Rotten a couple of times, daring him to hit her with a chair. Balls and Axl fight over who will be the one to hit her. During their argument, Jazz runs out with a chair and hits her from behind. All 3 celebrate before leaving.

Joey Styles says next week a WCW Hardcore star will be jumping to this very program on TNN and WCW doesn’t even know :hm:

In a parking lot, Raven says he got his head split open and now he’s left all alone with his demons. But he takes great solace in the fact, that all the misery that he’s gonna bring to him and the Impact Players. He says Justin will never be him, and Lance will never reach his level. Quote the Raven – Nevermore.

 

[Deezy]

brah it's not poetry in motion....it's air sabu.

we call it Got to Give it Up.....not Blurred Lines

 

[Crippler]

brah it's not poetry in motion....it's air sabu.

we call it Got to Give it Up.....not Blurred Lines

thank you.

 

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW Hardcore TV: Episode 340
October 30th, 1999
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Joey Styles is in the ring but is quickly interrupted by Lue E. Dangerously AKA Sign-Guy Dudley. Lue tells him to shut up and hold the mic so he can talk; Lou says he came here 6 years ago, as a fan. And he did anything he could to become part of ECW. Drove cars, took pictures and even set up chairs. He says he did that because he knew this company was special, and for 4 years he knew he was part of a special tag team, a team that set the world on fire. But they left me in the shadows, but tonight, I’m gonna make a name for myself….I AM THE GREATEST MANAGER IN WRESTLING! AND MY NAME HAPPEN TO BE LUE E. DANGERIOSULY! Heyman watches on from the editing place up top, I forgot the name. Anyway, he looks amused, as a “Fuck him up, Paul E.” chant breaks out, Lou says he will confirm all the internet rumors, and he has brought a former ECW champion back with him………………MIKEY WHIPWRECK!!!!!

ECW World Heavyweight Championship: Mikey Whipwreck (w/Lou E. Dangerously) vs. Mike Awesome (w/Judge Jeff Jones)
Hardcore TV finally does something right and airs something I want to see. Granted, it’s a Mike showcase, but it’s totally Awesome (pun intended) plus this is was Mikey was born to do, he was born to get destroyed and makes guys look Awesome, yes pun intended. Mike beats the shit out of him for 5 minutes, he then kills him with an Alabama Slam. Mikey does like 3 moves before Awesome has had enough and powerbombs him through a table at ringside, he rolls him back in and hits the Awesome splash off the top for the win. **1/2

Tajiri (w/Steve Corino & Jack Victory) vs. Jerry Lynn
This gets 10 minutes, so it’s naturally good for the most part. I love the opening minute or so as Tajiri throws some high kicks to Lynn’s chest and Lynn acts tough and eggs him on for more, so as he’s doing that he leaves his ribs wide open and Tajiri kicks the shit out of it. For the most part, Lynn sells the ribs like 40% of the match, but Tajiri only goes to the ribs out of desperation. He targets the head for the rest. After some quick counter and reversals, Tajiri just goes all out piece of amazing shit, he comes off the apron with a flying chair which busts Lynn open, he then goes under the ring and gets one of the monkey wrenches used to tighten the ropes and begins digging at Lynn’s open cut Lynn counters a DDT or brainbuster into an inverted chair for two, and makes his comeback. At this time he’s totally forgotten the ribs and just goes on to do Lynn stuff. Pretty cool spot, Tajiri looks like he’s about to hit a tombstone but instead throws Lynn up and drops him ribs first onto his knees. Both men go back and forth on big moves and near falls until Lynn hits a cradle piledriver but Corino attack Lynn and the ref just allows it, Corino goes to work on the ribs but Lynn gives no fucks and gives him a credible piledriver, he takes out Victory with a dive. Once he rolls back in Tajiri sprays the red mist in his eyes and hits a brainbuster for the win. ***

ECW Tag Team Championships: The Impact Players (w/Dawn Marie & Jason) vs. Tommy Dreamer & Raven (w/Francine)
This is clearly an angle match, Raven and Dreamer spend the majority of the match fuckin with each other and almost costing the other the match, but the other would make the save. They would also begin fighting one another at times before going back to fighting Lance and Justin, this goes on for about 5 minutes or so. It’s a mess, Tommy and Raven hit stereo DDT’s but Dawn breaks it up, which leads to Francine coming in for the catfight. Dreamer grabs Dawn and goes for a piledriver…..BUT RHINO HITS THE RING, he takes out Tommy as Raven watches on. But as he goes after Rhino Justin canes him, The Impact Players hit stereo Piledrivers but the LIGHTS GO OUT!!!! AND THE MOTHERFUCKIN SANDMAN IS ON THE EAGLES NEST!!!!! FUCK YEAH!!! HE MAKES HIS WAY DOWN THROUGH THE CROWD AND GETS ON THE APRON. HE DOES HIS AWSOME DRINK BEER ENTRANCE BUT WHEN HE GETS IN JASON TRIES TO ATTACK HIM BUT IT HAS NO EFFECTS SO SANDMAN CANES HIM! RHINO WANTS TO FIGHT, BUT Lance and Justin hold him back, Corino runs down and all three take Rhino out of the ring. Raven and Sandman go face to face, but Raven bails. Tommy and Sandman hug like Sandman just got out of prison and Dreamer looks like he just got his best friend back. Best moment of ECW 1999 for sure.

​

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! I HAVE TO NOW DOWNLOAD THE ORGINAL ECW 1999’s SHOWS JUST SO I CAN WATCH SANDMAN’ ENTRANCE IN IT’S ORGINAL FORM, I NEED ENTER SANDMAN IN MY LIFE.

 

[Deezy]

I like how all.the heels.wait and throw random punches while.sandman takes 4 days to get to the ring

 

[Crippler]

I like how all.the heels.wait and throw random punches while.sandman takes 4 days to get to the ring

maybe they were all in shock, or it's one of wrestlings many unsolved dumbshit. E.G. Getting distracted by entrance music longer than 3 seconds

 

[Deezy]

the power of Metallica

 

[Crippler]

well enter sandman is top 2 all time

 

[Deezy]

well enter sandman is top 2 all time

chuuuuch

 

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW Wrestling on TNN: Episode 11
November 5th, 1999
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

The show opens with the Sandman’s return to ECW, I love the gif so much I’m just gonna most it again.

Joey Styles and Joel “Joey Styles you can go play in traffic because I’m all the show needs to get the female demographic” Gertner welcome us to the show, Joey talks about N2R fanfest, before giving a rundown of the current PPV card.

The Baldies are in the ring, they call out Balls and Axl to see who are the real hardcore, chair swinging freaks. Balls and Axl come out and run off Angel and Devito, while Skull watches on. He then challenges them so Axl nails him in the back with a chair and Balls nails him in the head. Suddenly, PN News runs out and attacks Balls and Axl, Styles yells he’s joined the baldies. They beat them down, but New Jack makes the save, he does his usual hardcore, weapons spots...BUT ANGEL STAPLES NEW JACK IN THE EYE!!! Balls and Axl rush over and shield Balls as other wrestlers and medics come out to tend to Jack.

On the mean streets of Philly, the Baldies are walking around, Devito says people use to walk these streets in fear, but not anymore because we took your hood. Skull says Hey, New Jack, I’ve heard your name is not on the streets no more. I heard you went soft. PN says he use to be a bad guy. Angel says I can’t believe you let us play you like that. You said you were tough, the streets now belong to the baldies.

Little Guido (w/Big Sal E. Graziano) vs. Super Crazy vs. Little Spike Dudley
So this totally catches me off guard, I was getting so sick of these 3-way dances, and Guido dances but this shit right here. GOD DAMN! And it started pre-match, so a girl dressed as Spike is in the crowd. So Spike goes over and gives her his own pair of glasses. Guido being “tough guy, pitbull” gimmick doesn’t like that shit, so he goes over rips the glasses off her head and stomps on them. The best thing he’s done all year. Well, Spike is pissed and we get the return of amazing pissed off brawling yet can do all the high-flying stuff too Spike, Crazy is crazy and does his spots, and Guido is just the heel body used to practice moves on but for some reason everything just meshes tremendously. It feels like one of those X-Division matches when it was at its peak 2004-2007. Tones of actions, all 3 men get a ton of shine. I love that Spike always knew where Guido was so whenever he got the chance he would dish punishment out to him first. E.G. Crazy sends Spike over the top but Spike lands on his feet on the apron, he sees Guido on the floor and dives onto him. From that, we get this amazing crowd playing, with great chair shots and moves down with chairs. Spike is totally the star and shows he might be the 3rd best wrestler in the company behind Tajiri and maybe Crazy/RVD depends on what show it is. Sal gets involved first by squishing Crazy on a guard rail, he then goes to put Spike through a table but Spike counters and Acid Drops him through it instead. Spike rolls in and goes for an Acid Drop to Guido but he counters into the unprettier and eliminates him. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Typical ECW fuckery, eliminate the guy that was making this match what it was, too and keeping two guys that we’ve seen all fucking year. But with that being said Guido/Spike interaction was good, it’s not lightning in a bottle, but they’re just building off the energy spike left and the crowd are super into it so they have that working for them too. A couple of near falls as Crazy goes for the 3 moonsaults, but after the 2nd he sees Sal getting up and dropkicks a chair back into his face taking him out. As he goes for the 3rd that gave Guido enough times to get the knees up. That really doesn’t mean anything as no less than 3 seconds later Crazy hits Guido with a brainbuster but Guido kicks out, good for him. They trade forearms until Crazy has had enough and hits a sitdown powerbomb for the win. HOLY SHIT! That was good. MOTYC ***1/2

PULP FICTION

RVD says he is the top guy in this company, even when Taz was world champion all people wanted to do was talk about ROB VAN DAM! He says he knows Taz wants to punish him for that, but don’t be man that people call him the best wrestling in the whole fucking world and nobody ever said that about him ~ Survive if I let you, against the Whole fuckin show.

Simon never comes along, Simon always bring his BIG DICK!

Danny is crying and says I just lost my woman, she’s never coming back. And Roadkill I;m glad you’re here, and you know something? All you single ladies, you ready to go one on one with the DANACONDA? We’re in room 637.

Fonzie is with Sabu, Fonzie says Candido is crazy for making his return to PPV against Sabu, he’s gonna put him through a table and will be lucky if he even makes a return to the dressing room.

Simon says he's bringing his BIG DICK to Buffalo, and they’re coming together.

Jerry Lynn says people know him from his matches with RVD, but the next time he meets to Tajiri he’s gonna kick his ass, and kick it real good and he will know he’s messing with the new show.

The Baldies say they’re not hard to find, and it could be a lot worse for New Jack.

Simon says if you play with Simon you also have to play with his BIG DICK and his BIG DICK is real stiff.

Steve Corino says this is the biggest N2R of all time and there's gonna be some winners and losers. He says The Sandman brought his cigarettes, beer, cane but he also and brought his ass too, and Rhino's going to hand that back to him. Rhino says he wasn’t here in during Sandman’s glory days he doesn't owe Sandman any respect or admiration but he will give him an ass kicking. And after Sunday people will not care about you, they all will be talking about RHINO!

Raven says how could you do it, Tommy, how could you let Sandman into our happy family. He says Lance Storm is a primadonna at best but he'll look pretty with a face full of blood, and he can't wait to hurt Justin Credible. He says he would sooner watch his mother die than let Credible beat him because it's better to have a condemned soul than to have none at all. Quote the Raven, nevermore.

 

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW Hardcore TV: Episode 341
November 6th, 1999
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Backstage: Steve Corino is with Rhino and Jack Victory, he says the plan seemed so perfect. The ECW Arena, famous for surprises. The ECW tag team titles were about to go to the Impact Players, but the lights went out. And above the eagle's nest…THERE HE WAS! HE SANDMAN! All the fans crying, and happy their hero was back. Everyone in the ring was so scared and backing off except for one man. One man was ready dor the challenge, one man wasn’t scared, one man was ready. The Sandman brought his cigarettes, beer, cane. But one thing you forgot to bring, that we brought for you, and that was your nightmare. And that nightmares name is Rhino. Rhino says the promo he said from TNN’s pulp fiction.

The Sandman’s return is aired again.

The ending of Taz/Sabu and the post-match, fuckery from TNN 2 weeks ago airs.

Backstage: Fonzie says at November to Remember, his man RVD is gonna shine like he’s never shined before on you TAZ. RVD says all Taz’s fans have been chanting RVD while he was world champ, I’m more popular than you hell I’m the most popular in the company. Don’t worry Taz this is your shot to prove you’re the best, RVD says he plans on getting a few more hits in 4:20 styles. You know what I’m saying? THE WHOLE FUCKIN’ SHOW.

New Jack getting his eye stapled on TNN airs.

Backstage: Balls and Axl are somewhere in the building, Axl says you look around at where ECW has become and you have guys trying to make a name for themselves, the baldies. To do what you did to “Jarome” OH SHIIT! SHOOT NAMES IT’S REAL BREHZ! Axl says this isn’t about getting over lmao and what they did was ridiculous, Balls says he and Jack use to live together, we did everything together, it’s one thing trying to get over but it’s another when you come after our friend. Axl cuts him off and says tonight they crossed the line it’s not business anymore it’s personal.

November To Remember HYPE
Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka – ECW World Title
RVD vs. TAZ – TV Title
Jerry Lynn vs. Tajiri vs. Super Crazy
Chris Candido vs. Sabu
Impact Players & Rhino vs. Raven, Tommy Dreamer & The Sandman
The Baldies vs. Axl Rotten and Balls Mahoney (New Jack says he’ll be at the match)

The Lynn getting suckered in by Corino before getting jumped by Tajiri airs.

The ending of Lynn/Tajiri match from last weeks Hardcore TV airs.

A replay of Tommy saluting Sandman as he left 14 months ago, that resulted in Justin caning him like 14 times. We just had to end the fuckin show with Justin Credible UGH!

Fuckin 6 minutes ECW video package airs.

 

[Deezy]

Hey everything on this show is fake.....but this....this is real.

Every shoot angle ever.

 

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW November To Remember
November 7th, 1999
Buffalo, New York

Joey Styles and Cyrus are in the ring and welcome us to the show. Cyrus has one white glove on. Joey asks him about it and Cyrus says Buffalo is the bacteria capital of the United States. it's that time once again for the man that's so good on the mic that he only works once every eight weeks. Smart marks of the world, rejoice, Cyrus is back on PPV. Suddenly, Joel “I'm The One They Want to Pork When They're in Buffalo, and when I’m near Niagara Falls, the fountains come when they lick my balls" Gertner interrupts, Joel gets into the ring and says, seeing how he is the host of ECW on TNN, it follows that he should be out here to carry the PPV too. Taz now comes out, to no pop at all. Joel cowers behind Joey, as Taz says Joey hasn't returned any phone calls or messages or e-mails and asks where the god damned heat. Joey says he called him last and Taz says he's a lying bastard and he knows he tried to punk him out on TNN by implying he choked out RVD from behind and did a cowardly act. Joey says he did so, Taz says okay HOW DO I APPLY THE TAZMISSION? From behind, Joey then says you didn’t have to lock it on, he was fighting Sabu. Taz says he seized the opportunity, and you know what, if you didn’t like it. I DON’T GIVE A SHIT! If the company or Heyman didn’t like I don’t care. I do what I want. So, being that you punked me out that means you want to fight me, Joey. “Fuck him up Joey” chants breaks out, Taz says every one of these ungrateful pieces of shit, sons of bitches wanna see you kick my ass. WELL BRING IT! Joey says he’s sorry he offended him. Taz twists every word Joey says against him before giving him the 3 count to leave. Joey leaves, so Taz turns to Joel who is laughing, and Taz asks him “you think this is funny fat shit” He asks why didn’t he stop him when Styles said it, Joel goes to leave so Taz locks him in the TazMission. Taz says RVD will find out why I AM TAZ! THE HUMAN SUPLEX MACHINE. BEAT ME IF YOU CAN, SURVIVE IF I LET YOU! Cyrus thanks, Taz, and Taz says no thank you.

Simon Diamond and Dick Hertz come out, Simon says it’s a sad day when two clean-cut all-American, good-looking guys can’t hang out and be friends without hearing derogatory comments. Dick takes off his ring jacket and says go get him, tiger, before slapping his ass. Simon says he didn’t say to do that, but he’ll let dick slide this time. He then does this gay humor/dick pun promo until Jazz comes out. Jazz says she’s sick of Simond and slaps him, she then hits him with a DDT but Dick hits her with a move called the “Penile Implant” smh. Well that brings out Spike, he hits Dicks with an Acid Drop and the bell rings.

Simon Diamond (w/Dick Hertz) vs. Spike Dudley
This is like 3 minutes and is a total waste of Spike talent. He does his best to make Simond look respectable. Spike comes off the top with a wooden chair which busts open Simond, Simon does some stuff its pretty trash so Spike hits him with an Acid Drop for the win. After the match; Guido and Sal run out to attack Spike. They put the boots to him until Nova makes the save and we get our next match. UGH! *1/2

Nova vs. Little Guido (w/Big Sal E. Graziano)
Joey says Nova is the single most imitated wrestler in the business today lmaolmao who the fuck is writing this shit? This goes around 4 minutes, and the good thing about this is it’s all go, go, go super fast paced action the entire time. They both do moves to one another, the only highlight was Nova hitting a modified Samoan drop off the top rope. The match would end after Sal tries to get involved but that backfires and allows Guido to hit the Tomikaze for the win. After the match; The FBI continues to put the boots to him….But, Chris Chetti makes his return and makes the save but Danny Doring and Amish Roadkill now runs out to attack Chetti and beat him down. Thank fuck. *1/4

Steve Corino, Tajiri & Jack Victory come out. Corino says everyone here and watching at home, knows when a 3-way dance is happening, you have to have the GOD of the 3-way dance. Everybody knows Japanese wrestlers are the smartest wrestlers in the world. We have beaten Super Crazy so many times it’s so easy, and if Jerry Lynn can stop complaining about every broken nail or bruised toe you have. You will see my MAN! The Japanese Buzzsaw is the true king of the three-way.

Tajiri (w/Steve Corino & Jack Victory) vs. Super Crazy vs. Jerry Lynn
This is really good, as usual. Super fast paced, counters, reversals, and spots by all 3 that all get time to shine. No one teams up for a 2-1 or really sat back and watches on, also a lot of no selling. I still don’t know why Lynn has his ribs taped up if 1, no one targets them and 2 he doesn’t sell them at all. They brawl in the crowd why Crazy hits a Crazy moonsault off the balcony before they all go back to the ring, for more spots and near falls. Lynn hits Crazy with a cradle piledriver, but Tajiri hates Crazy so much that he drop kicks Lynn in the face and hits Crazy with a brainbuster eliminating him. Lynn/Tajiri gets about 4 minutes of 1on1, and we finally get some structure to the match, kinda as Tajiri targets the ribs for a bit first with the spinning knee to the ribs out of the tombstone then with some kicks. Tough guy Lynn “yells at him to kick him harder” because bruised ribs ain’t shit, and they really don’t mean shit when the best kicker in the business is kicking them. Anyway, Lynn catches the 3rd kick and counters into a Cradle Piledrives for the win. After the match; Corino jumps Lynn but that backfires and Lynn hits him with a Cradle Piledriver. ***

Da Baldies vs. Balls Mahoney, Axl Rotten & New Jack
This is like 8 minutes, so basically is a 4-2 for like for a few minutes. Angel wearing the staple gun around his neck like a chain was great. New Jack comes out once Balls and Axl start getting their ass kicked. This turns into the typical New Jack match, tons of weapons and violence. Jack nails Angel in the dick with one of those old school Vacuums he THEN STAPLES ANGEL IN THE DICK!!! They all brawl as New Jack sets up a table in the crowd, New Jack then climbs up a basketball backboard and hits this insane fuckin dive off it through….IDK because it’s a wide shot and we can’t see who it is. Jack and Axl come back to the ring where PN and Skull are left in the ring, Jack takes out PN with a video game console, he then staples Skull in the head, but as Jack is taunting Angel nails him in the back of the head with the guitar and covers for the win. NEW KING OF THE STREETS ~ SPANISH ANGEL.

Cyrus says the office want him to talk more to get himself over if that’s okay with Joey. Joey seems confused, and Cyrus says don’t kayfive the people.

Backstage: Fonzie is with Sabu, Fonzie says in a few minutes we will get to see what Sabu does best, Fonzie seems super melo and emotional here. He says Sabu is bigger than life. He fights with more heart than wrestler than any wrestler ever and tonight. Candido better be ready for the fight of his life. Sabu just lost his best friend, and he’s dedicating his match to Ticho and his family.

Chris Candido (w/Tammy-Lynn Sytch) vs. Sabu (w/Bill Alfonso)
Okay, I get that Sabu’s best friend just passed away and he wants to dedicate this match to him, which is great don’t get me wrong. But did this need 17 minutes? Especially when this has no backstory at all this whole year? I don’t remember them even being on screen together this year or even in the build? This should have been Rhino/Sabu II, wasn’t Candido back in a Lance feud, now I get Sandman came back and probably fucked up Candido as the 3rd man, but still you can leaving Candido off another PPV. It’s not like fans are begging to still see him. Damn, Sunny must be blowing everyone for anything at this point because she looks a mess. Why do woman buy black lipstick if you’re not a goth? She looks stupid and terrible. I already hate this. Sabu, you deserve better. Okay now the match, and this storytelling wise might be the best Sabu match this year as he constantly works the back setting up for the camel clutch and for some of his table spots that target the back, but again the problem is it’s 17 minutes and Sabu and Candido have trouble so we get a who lot of filler. Candido is really good in this, he’s finally committed to being a serious wrestler and tops all that taunt after a move shit. Also, IDK, if Sabu was off his game or “Dedication” match from Sabu, means he’s gonna show he can wrestle instead of giving the people what that paid for and that’s double jumps, planchas, and tables. So after 10 minutes Candido brings in a table but misses a splash which hurts his back even more so Sabu goes back to the camel clutch, the fans begin a show your tits chant. To which Sabu drops the hold and begins Sabu’ing it up that all it took? They do some more stuff and more “show your tits” chants break out, which really is terrible. Like you think after the 5th time she’ll be like okay, let me show my tits. C’MON! A table is a set-up with Candido lying on it, but Tammy comes in to save him, but that brings on Fonzie to attack her. Candido recovers enough to save Tammy from being laid on the table. As he pushes her off, he’s bent over the table, allowing Sabu to come off of the top rope with a legdrop for two. Sabu then heads up again this time with a chair, landing right on Candido’s back. Sabu then applies the Camel Clutch and Candido taps out. Way too long. But it had its moments. Joey says he’s found a new respect for Candido, so I guess that was the plan. **3/4

Backstage: Tanaka is running on a treadmill, before talking in Japanese. He then says “Tonight, I become New world champion”

Judge Jeff Jones says Mike may have never beaten Tanaka in two straight meeting, but tonight that all changes. Mike says he’s gonna break Tanaka’s damn back.

Joey Styles says Tanaka should be supremely confident because in their series in Japan and all over the world Tanaka holds more wins, but in ECW, MIKE HAS NEVER BEATEN TANAKA IN A 1on1 match.

Earlier Today: Lou E. Dangerously fires a bunch of people, Francine then has security escort him from the building.

ECW World Heavyweight Championship: Masato Tanaka vs. Mike Awesome (w/Judge Jeff Jones)
This is everything we’ve come to expect when these two are in the ring together, hard hitting, intense brawling, chair shots to the head. And the only two wrestlers I give a pass to for their lack of selling or no selling at all, they make Jerry Lynn look like Steamboat or Brock as sellers compared to these two. MIKE HITS A MOTHERFUCKIN’ SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE FROM HE RING INTO THE CROWD! Holy shit. Mike then comes off the top and nails Tanaka with a chair shot, but Tanaka fires up, he takes another which floors him but Tanaka is back up, as Awesome goes for a 3rd Tanaka hits him with a roaring elbow knocking the chair back into his Awesome’s head. Awesome kicks out of both the flying chair splash and tornado DDT. He then counters another move into a sit-down awesomebomb onto a stack of chairs, running clothesline dumps Tanaka on the back of his head. Mike then sets up a table at ringside. Both men fight on the apron, but Mike hits a sit down awesomebomb through the table at ringside. In a callback from Anarchy Rulz, Tanaka countered a Top Rope Awesome Bomb through a table with a top rope superplex through a table for two. Tanaka begins firing up and goes for a roaring elbow but Mike ducks and German’s Tanaka right onto the back of his head, TANAKA IS BACK UP! BUT BEFORE HE CAN TRY ANOTHER ELBOW AWESOME LARIATS HIM! Mike then heads up top and hits the Awesome splash off the top but Tanaka kicks out. Awesome then drags him to the corner and hits an awesome bomb off the top for the win. ***1/2

ECW Television Championship: Taz vs. Rob Van Dam (w/Bill Alfonso)
Oh man, what could have been. I remember them building to a potential title vs. title match but Taz went and ruined his in-ring career by signing with the WWE so we didn’t get that, instead, we get this Taz who isn’t even on TV anymore and the crowd is all against at this point. The match starts off with a really good feeling out process, it’s a little sloppy and it had a couple of miscommunications but that added so much as it feels like both guys have real heat and are trying to embarrass the other. The match proceeds to Taz taking out his anger and frustration out on RVD, and RVD bumping in only ways he can. I love how in every Taz promo he use to say his hands are his weapons but his matches always seem to involved chairs and tables. The finish was super underwhelming and out of nowhere, so Taz hits a leg/arm suplex through a table set up in the corner for two, Fonzie tries to get involved and does by slapping Taz. He quickly bails as Taz picks up a chair. As Taz turns around he walks into RVD leaping side kick off the top. RVD then heads up top and connects but only gets a two count. Both men fight up top and it looks like Taz is going for a belly-to-belly off the top but slips, he crashes to the mat as the crowd chant “you fucked up” RVD hits a split legged moonsault for two. RVD hits a spin kick and finishes him off with the five-star frog splash for the win. Normally I say I wish most ECW matches were shorter but this needed an extra 4 minutes or so, it seemed rushed at 14 minutes. ***

Rhino & The Impact Players (w/Dawn Marie & Jason) vs. Tommy Dreamer, Raven & The Sandman (w/Francie)
So Dawn comes out wearing the greatest dress ever designed, thought of, made, worn in history. She’s wonderful. And then Francine comes out wearing the IDK what it’s called but I like it, it’s clearly white trash at it’s finest. I miss when woman of wrestling dressed like whores. Good times. In other news the collective entrances by all 6 are longer than the whole match I don’t know what this is main eventing outside of the big names, this had no business over the world title or the tv title, shit the tv title shouldn’t be above the world title. Sadly, ECW missed the boat on this. Instead of giving me that all out crazy ECW brawl with all 6 going wild and fight we get a straight traditional 6 man. This is more angle and set up for future matches more than anything. E.G. Rhino/Sandman, the continuing of Raven fuckin with Tommy and Sandman. Credible running away from Sandman. All that, Sandman gets isolated for ¾ of the match lol until Raven shoves Tommy out of the way and he gets the hot tag, he takes out everyone as the match breaks down and the match picks up, everyone does some spots as Raven hits the evenflow DDT on Justin but Lance makes the save. Raven baits Tommy into setting up a chair and going for a double jump??? But as he does that Raven hits him with a drop toe hold sending Tommy face first into the chair. Raven then goes for a plancha but Rhino moves and Raven crashes through a table. Back in Rhino goes to Gore Sandman, but Sandman moves and Lance takes the gore instead. Sandman canes Rhino but Rhino won’t go down until the 3rd. He goes to cane Lance but Dawn stops him so we get the vintage catfight. Sandman pulls Dawn off and makes out with her. Justin is up and is sandwiched between Raven and Sandman, Raven goes to hit Justin in the back of the head with a cane but doesn’t see Raven coming towards Justin, so when Justin ducks Raven hits him. Lance comes in and takes out Raven, which allows Justin to hit the That’s incredible on Sandman for the win. JUSTIN WINS ALWAYS! Joey who clearly isn’t watching the show tries to say Raven did that on purpose. ** - **1/4

Guilty as Charged; Sunday Night, January 9th, 2000.

 

[Crippler]

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mike Awesome
ECW Television Champion: Rob Van Dam
ECW Tag Team Champions: Tommy Dreamer & Raven

ECW Wrestling on TNN: Episode 12
November 12th, 1999
Dayton, Ohio

Justin, Lance, and Dawn enter the building when Jason rushes up to them and says we’re leaving. Jason says the Sandman is drunk and he’s beating up cops. Rhino then comes over and says when he sees the Sandman he’s gonna grab that cane and shove it so far up his ass. Lance and Dawn decide they’re leaving and Justin says he’s beaten him once and will do it again. Lance says he’s an athlete and doesn’t need to put up with this, so Dawn and he left. Justin decides to stay with Rhino.

Joey Styles and Joel Gertner welcome us to the show, Joey asks have we seen the break up of the Impact players? LIKE SERIOUSLY DOES HE NOT WATCH THE SHOW? So after their biggest win of their ECW’s run so far, after one disagreement they’re gonna decide to break up? C’MON.

Tonight: Jerry Lynn vs. Steve Corino, Tajiri vs. Super Crazy & Rhino vs. The Sandman

In the bathroom; Tommy does his best Raven impression. Tommy says Raven can hide behind piercing and tattoos, but he’s just one of us. Life Sucks, just take it on the chin. He asks what Raven could do now that he hasn't done before. He'll beat him? So what. He says he doesn't care about his body and busts himself open by slamming his head against the stall wall. They're bound by blood now and tells Scotty to do the right thing.

Steve Corino and Jack Victory come out, Corino says a lot of things in ECW make him sick, but the thing that makes him sick the most is people that cry and whine and people who are scared to wrestle hurt. He says to look at him, he's been wrestling with a broken appendix for nine months now. Just because Jerry Lynn has a few bruised ribs, he doesn’t wrestle that much anymore, he calls Lynn to get his crippled ass out so he can end his career finally.

Steve Corino (w/Jack Victory) vs. Jerry Lynn
This is fine, it’s super short so it works. Lynn is all over Corino to start until Jack gets involved which allows Corino to go after the ribs. It’s super vicious and really good for the short time it got, Lynn’s selling is good too until it’s time for his comeback then it’s lolwat ribs. Lynn hits a cradle piledriver for the win. After the match; Tajiri hits the ring and sprays the green mist in Lynn;s eyes. Victory comes in and holds Lynn up so he can kick away at the ribs. Super Crazy makes the save, but as Crazy tries to help him up Lynn starts fighting him (you know, because he’s still blinded) Corino and co laugh and taunt at the stage. *3/4

Cyrus is in an office on the phone, He says neither or he or Paul is happy with it, so it has to change and says to try and make him look less fat on TV. He sees the camera and hangs up. He says on behalf of the creative department, he has a review of the commentary situation. He says Joey is good, but Joel Gertner has heat with the boys because he gets himself over at the expense of the talent, and he misbehaved at N2R by getting into a fight with talent. He says he's calling a meeting and he'd like Joel Gertner to come to the office so they can discuss his future, and he may want to explore other options. Onward and upward.

Joel Gertner is in shock and upset, Joey says’s there is no creative department or office. Joel says Joey is in the office. Joel begins sucking up and doing his job, Joey then decides to fuck with Joel and says there is an office and they are always watching.

Tajiri vs. Super Crazy
This is fine, Tajiri continues to shine at this pure piece of shitheel, e.g. they were doing their normal counter, reversal wrestling on the mat. So Tajiri gets up and claps along with the fans he then walks over to Crazy and offers the handshake but as Crazy looks around and isn’t looking at him. Tajiri roundhouse kicks him mark: They brawl through the crowd to where Crazy hits a moonsault off the stands, back in the ring. Crazy does a rolling surfboard before locking in a dragon choke, but then just breaks it. Because fuck trying to win. He then goes for the triple moonsault, Tajiri gets the knees up on the 2nd moonsault, the ref gets bumped, so Lynn comes out and beats up both men. He hits Crazy with a cradle piledriver and leaves which allows Tajiri to hit a standing moonsault for the win. *3/4

Steve Corino and Rhino are in the ring, Corino says it's time for Rhino to go from the greatest rookie to the Next Big Thing in Sports. So, Sandman, get your drunk ass out here.

Before the match, Fuckin Heyman cuts Sandman’s entrance short for a fuckin Axl and Balls promo in the bathroom, what kind of say this is this? Axl begins to talk…..BUT NEVER MIND THAT SHIT! The Baldies are behind the toilet doors and slowly rise up, like some movie scene the Baldies then bust out and beat them down that was amazing.

Rhino (w/Steve Corino) vs. The Sandman
Oh man, how I missed the Sandman. And now that I downloaded the original TNN’s I can watch Sandman’s entrance in 720p on my TV while I have the original audio from my laptop. Yeah, I’m a fuckin nerd like that. FUCK YEAH! Rhino Gores him as soon as he enters the ring, he begins beating him up in and out of the ring. Sandman takes over once the brawl goes to the floor, the match goes back and forth for a little bit until Jack and Steve get involved a few times but Rhino can’t capitalize on it, so Justin and Jason come out. Tommy makes the save but it’s still 5-2. That brings out Raven, who takes out all of the heels he helps up Dreamer. But as he turns around Sandman blasts Raven with a cane he then hitting him multiple times with the cane. Dreamer then pulls Sandman off and drags him to the back.

Backstage: Raven says he did the ring thing, Tommy. Why did you let the drunk beat me up? This is just like when I was 7 years old. When I came home from school with an A-, why dad beat the crap out of me. I can still smell the beer on his breath. I DID THE RIGHT THING! I asked my mom, she said you're lucky that’s all he does to you and Tommy and his mom let that drunk beat him up. He keeps repeating that he did the right thing.

 

[Deezy]

ECW is booked like 205 Live minus the hardcore shit.